Bella Donna Boudreaux is a cheerful assassin (petitmort) wrote in valarlogs, @ 2013-09-20 00:48:00 |
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Entry tags: | !complete, bella donna boudreaux, commander tyra shepard |
Who: Belle Boudreaux and Shepard
Where: The Ranch
What: chatting
When: 9/18
Warnings/Rating: PG-13 for language
Status complete
Belle was pleased when Emma sent her to the ranch on an errand. Emma’s personal assistant was on vacation to cope with breaking up with her boyfriend, and Belle was fine with the extra tasks. With Winston spending more time in Boston she needed a distraction, anyway.
She was supposed to deliver something to Wrex, which would give her a chance to chat with him, and hopefully she’d seen Tyra as well. She would take any excuse to waste time with Tyra, and maybe on the way out she’d poke her head in on Scott to see what he was up to. She didn’t think Emma would care, this felt like busy work, anyway.
She smiled as she bounced into the office building, grinning at Jenny. “Hello! Is Wrex available?”
“He’s out at the moment,” the red-head said, looking at Belle over her glasses. “What can I help you with?”
“I got this,” Shepard said, coming out of the rec area. She gave Jenny a flirty look, then turned her head towards Belle and grinned. Jenny just rolled her eyes.
Belle smiled at Jenny, then turned to Shepard. “Let me get my official work done first.” She handed the envelope over. “Missus Summers wanted me t’ deliver that. God only knows what it is.” She didn’t give a single fuck.
Shepard took the envelope and looked at it, then walked into the back to drop it on Wrex’s desk. She came back a moment later. “We’ll let him worry about it, then.”
Belle nodded. “Sounds good t’ me. You mind givin’ me a tour? I ain’t seen this place before and I keep hearin’ about it.”
“Sure. I can give you the personal tour,” she replied, putting her arm around her and guiding her outside. Mostly to hear the snort that Jenny let out.
Belle laughed and looped her arm around Shepard’s waist. “I hear the barn’s pretty romantic.” She teased, smirking at Shepard.
“Yep. Especially with all that hay and sweat.” She winked.
Belle laughed and let go of Tyra so she could light a cigarette. “How’s life? Glad t’ see you up again.”
“Better now that I’m not dying. I can’t stand being laid up. Rather die on my feet.” Shepard laughed.
“I understand. I’m real glad it wasn’t me that was laid up.” Though she hated that other people had been sick. “Got some work for you, if you’re interested, but that isn’t what I wanna talk about right now.”
“Just let me know when you want to. What do you wanna talk about?” Shepard glanced at her.
“That came out wrong. I don’t have anything to talk about, ‘cept figuring out when I’m going to kick your ass at pool again. I just don’t wanna talk about that now.” Belle took a long drag off her cigarette. “It feels like it’s been awhile since we talked, if you don’t count on the phone.”
“Yeah, I think I needed this,” Shepard replied. She stopped and turned to look at Belle. She lit up her own cigarette.
Belle nodded, turning her head to exhale. “Probably. You’ve been through a lot recently. Been nothin’ but shit everywhere for the people I care about these days, save a couple.”
“I’m fine.” as long as people didn’t keep bringing up her and Dani.
“Good, ‘cause I got enough people fallin’ apart around me.” Belle stubbed her cigarette out on the side of her zippo and pocketed the butt. “Vanille killed someone who attacked her a few days ago. It was necessary, but she’s just a kid still in a lot of ways.”
“First kill is always the hardest.” And the second, and third, and tenth. It got easier to do, but it was no easier on the soul. “Just hope that there’s not a second.”
“Second time I’ve heard that today.” Belle noted. They were both right, but it was different this time. “Vanille’s not a soldier. She didn’t sign up for it. I’m glad she fought, and I’m glad nobody important was hurt, but I’m worried about how she’s gonna deal with it when it hits her.” Because it would, and that would define her as a person from that moment on.
“The only way any of us can. A little bit at a time. You and that girl of hers will need to help her through it.”
“We all face it alone, in the end. The only way out is through, and nobody can make that journey for you.” She sighed. “I mentioned maybe havin’ NIcholas move in, and she got all fake happy about it, and now I wish I hadn’t said nothin’.”
Shepard pondered that for a moment. It was true she’d always faced things alone, but she’d also had that pillar of compatriots to rely on. Just knowing they were there was often enough. “She’s probably confused, and a little jealous. It’s an irrational kind of hurt. Is Vanille still living there? You kind of can’t say nothing.”
“Yeah I can if I also don’t ask him t’ move in. It was a stupid idea.” She shrugged. “Especially right after she had somethin’ so traumatic happen to her.”
“It’s hard to think straight when you’re in love,” Shepard replied, in an almost sing song voice.
Belle shoved her with one hand rolling her eyes. “Yeah, ‘cause that’s totally my problem.” Except maybe it was, and Belle didn’t know how to deal with that.
“Yeah? What are you going to do about it?” Shepard swatted at her hand. “And don’t tell me your job comes first. Some day you won’t have that job and then what will you do?”
“Be dead, probably.” Belle shrugged. “If not, find some halfway decent city, settle down, get a bunch of dogs and quietly drink myself to death.”
“That’s not a valid long term plan,” Tyra replied, rolling her eyes. “I was facing extinction and I still planned on a family. You have to have that thing to look forward to.”
“I don’t want a family. I gave mine up.” She shrugged. “I don’t have a long term plan. I don’t have any plan for when I’m not working anymore.” Which was part of the reason she was so determined to keep working. “Beside, you think he’s going to sit around and wait for me t’ be done gettin’ shot at an’ pokin’ at crazy people with a stick? That ain’t happening and it wouldn’t be fair for me t’ ask him, anyway.”
“No, I somehow think he’s going to join you in the getting shot at and poking crazy people with a stick,” Shepard replied, giving Bella an amused look. “Because you really know how to pick them.”
“Pfft.” Belle noted, but there wasn’t much actual derision in her expression. He would probably make an okay agent. As good as the assholes she was dealing with normally, even if he didn’t have superpowers. “This is revenge for giving your girlfriend unsolicited advice, right?”
“Yes.” Shepard grinned at her. “But Dani isn’t my girlfriend.”
“And Nicholas ain’t my boyfriend.” Belle replied, shrugging one shoulder. “She’s cute, but pretty fucked up.”
“No more or less fucked up than me or you,” she pointed out, elbowing Belle. “At least she’s trying to pull herself together. Fuck, she’s more put together than some of my crew was.” She thought of Jack. If there hadn’t been Liara, she probably would have pursued Jack harder. There had been a layer of raw emotion underneath the cursing and violence and tattoos that she’d wanted to get to. She’d been so proud to see the woman teaching people when she’d seen her again.
“That’s fair. I wouldn’t fuck me if I was anyone else.” She shrugged. “We’re all fucked up one way or another, and if we weren’t, the dreams would do it for us.”
“Just take my word for it. Fighting and fighting without having something in mind for when the fighting is done?” Shepard shook her head. “No way to live. Make Wolfy your boyfriend, God knows he wants it.”
“It’s worked fine so far, mom.” Belle said with a sigh, rubbing the bridge of her nose. “The difference is I’ve accepted that what I’m fightin’ for is impossible, so I know I’ll never get a chance t’ rest.”
“That’s bullshit.” Shepard pulled out a cigarette and lit it up. She tried not to smoke much, but she was feeling frustrated. “Maybe you need to start working for people who’ve fought the impossible and lived to talk about it.”
Well, fine. Belle pulled out another cigarette as well. “Yeah? There any point in this conversation where you won’t be critcizin’ my career choice? ‘Cause I’d be happy as hell t’ skip to that part.”
“Would you like an alternative?” Shepard asked, raising her eyebrows. “Wouldn’t be much different. Just different boss, and some different mission specs. Off the books.”
“Not even sure I’m on the books now. I’d be workin’ for you.” It wasn’t a guess. She knew Shepard was in something, she just didn’t know what.
“Yeah. I don’t even have most of my squad on this, from my dreams.” She kept the two separate - the Normandy Crew were her family and they were for a certain kind of mission. They had their own lives and she wasn’t going to drag them into the ops she’d been involved in since she ‘retired.’
“But you’ll bring me in and probably Nicholas.” She shrugged. She was used to getting the dangerous jobs.
“Yes. Some others.” She wanted Dani in, but she was sick and there was part of her that wanted to protect her. Some other people too. She had to rebuild her team, anyway.
“I’ll think about it. What can you tell me about it right now?” She wasn’t going to move with any kind of haste, but if she didn’t have to worry about leaving Nicholas, that would take a lot of pressure off.
“We do a lot of the hotspots around the world. Infiltration missions. A-team type crap too. Info gathering. Technically we’re supposed to avoid combat.” Shepard smirked at that.
“Right.” Belle noted with a laugh. “Of course. Same with me.”
“I report to one man. Name’s Anderson. He acts as the go between between us and the rest of the government.”
“You trust him?” That was the most important thing, in the end.
“I’d trust him with my life and my family,” she replied. “He’s like a mentor.”
She nodded. That was enough for her. “I’ll think about it.”
“And Wolfwood?” Shepard took a toke of her cigarette. “He’s thinking about it too.”
“I’m hurt, Tyra.” Belle said, pressing her hand to her bountiful chest. “Probably talk it over with him, see if that’s what he wants.”
“You do that. Me, I need to talk to some other people.” Figure things out with Dani. Because they should. If Dani never wanted a family, that was going to pretty much be the end of anything more than friends with bennies.
Belle nodded. She didn’t figure she’d get any names if she didn’t agree to this, and it was a big decision. It meant a lot of things would change, and she had to figure out if that was okay with herself before she talked to anyone else about it. “Gonna be weird stayin’ in one place for longer’n a few months.”
“Weird, and kind of wonderful. Think about it.” She winked.
“I said I would.” Belle said with a laugh, shaking her head. “Let’s meet up Friday evenin’. I’m busy up until then, and we’ll be workin’ Saturday.”
"Sounds good to me," she replied. "I'll see you Friday."
Belle nodded and stubbed out her second cigarette. “I was gonna harass Scott before I left, but now it’ll have t’ wait for another time. I should get back before Mrs. Summers tries t’ order lunch and has t’ go get it herself. I’ll never hear the end of it is she has t’ trot her own ass t’ the front door.”