InsaneJournal

I just gotta remember that I have people in my life who can help me
Who: Belle and Vanille
Where: their place
What: dinner and hugs
When: earlier in the week
Warnings/Rating: pg
Status complete

Belle was getting worried about Vanille. She hardly ever saw the girl anymore, and she wasn’t showing up for work. Between Cerberus and taking care of Nicholas she wasn’t spending much time at home. It made her feel a little guilty.

So she started cooking when she came home from work and didn’t stop until she’d made a complete meal for them both. Plates in hand, carefully balanced, she went to Vanille’s door and knocked.

Since she couldn't remember how to control her powers, Vanille had mostly locked herself in her room. The dreams she'd had since her brand had come in hadn't really offered her any insight. It was obvious that they worked all by themselves when she got emotional, though, and she didn't want to hurt anyone else.

She missed people, though, so when Belle knocked on her door she hazarded opening it up a little. Maybe if she kept her hands behind her back...

"Uhm... Hi, Belle."

“Made you dinner.” She offered the plate to Vanille. “You doin’ okay, sweetie? I ain’t seen you much recently.”

Vanille eyed the plate, chewing on her lip a bit. It smelled really good, better than any of the food she'd scrounged for herself on the few times she'd left her bedroom - usually when she knew Belle wasn't around.

"Oh I'm just..."

Hiding from the world. She frowned, "I'm alright. That smells really good. If you uhm... leave it on the table there I'll pick it up."

Belle’s eyebrows went up, and she looked at Vanille carefully for a moment, as though considering her next move. After a moment she nodded and did as the girl asked. “So you just not gonna touch anyone ever again?”

"Well if I don't fling my hands at anyone, then... then they won't get hurt, right?" Vanille responded, her tone a bit like a child who'd been just been scolded. Her brow was wrinkled, and she looked down at the floor a bit, "I'm not that Vanille, you know? She's a lot more skilled than I am. I'm going t'end up poisoning you or electrocutin' you or something..."

“Don’t mind too much, if it gets you outta your room.” Belle admitted. “You can’t hide forever, and you ain’t gonna get better at controlin’ them if you don’t try.”

"But... you had to get the doctor that one time, and she pulled Mr. Wolfwood all apart, and he was still kinda sick for a while..." Vanille replied, her hands still folded behind her back. She clasped them together tightly, just in case her emotional state was about to summon a spell at random.

"The only thing I can try is NOT usin' them at all! Nothing I can do is good! Everything I can do is horrible!"

“Yeah, and he’s fine now. He’s not even mad at you, sweetie. But you’re only gonna hurt more people in the long run if you don’t get some kinda control over yourself.” She moved closer to Vanille, but kept her hands to herself for the moment.

"What if I kill someone?" Vanille whispered. She knew that Wolfwood wasn't mad at her anymore - he'd said so himself. But he'd also been extremely brief with her, and she was certain that their introduction hadn't exactly made her into his favorite person.

It was hard to forgive herself. It would have been even harder if he'd been permanently harmed, or worse.

“If you stay inside the only people you’re gonna hurt is Fang and me. I know I’m not gonna leave you in here for the rest of your life, and Fang ain’t, either. It’s scary, I know, but you gotta be brave for your own sake, sweetie.” She reached out to touch Vanille, to show that she wasn’t afraid.

Vanille was less than convinced, though she didn't back away when Belle reached her hand out. She did, however, wait to see if a green cloud showed up, or any of the other signs that her magic had gone off.

It didn't look like it had, and she took a deep breath, then let it out, "I just wish I knew that I could go back to livin' normally... But I don't know it for a fact. Everything's all... it's like the car crash, only worse. You think you're safe and then somethin' like this happens."

Belle nodded, brushing her fingertips over Vanille’s cheek. “I know. It’s a horrible thing t’ deal with, but it’ll never get better if you stay inside and mope forever. You can’t be happy with all that fear, and the only way t’ get rid of it is t’ take a chance. I promise I’ll be there for you no matter what happens.”

"Well... you can't be there for me if I kill you..." Vanille replied, pouting a bit. But Belle'd managed to talk enough sense into her to feel free to move her hands again. Which she did, to cross her arms over her chest. It accentuated the pouting.

Belle knew she was winning, and her smile told Vanille so. She playfully poked the girl’s stomach. “I’d haunt you, but in a good way. You’ll be layin’ in bed all alone in the house and the door’ll creak open and you’ll get this feeling like a millions fingers all ticklin’ you at once.” She tickled Vanille’s sides for emphasis.

Vanille giggled and squirmed, then squirmed some more, and started outright laughing.

She'd needed to laugh so badly that she kept on laughing for a little bit, just to capture the feeling of it. Even now, when she was so certain that nothing would be okay again, Belle had a way of restoring her ability to hope.

When she finally was able to stop, she wiped a quick tear out of her eye, and then glomped onto Belle, "I'd rather you tickle me while you're still alive, silly woman."

Belle hugged her back. “You’re not gonna hurt me, sweetie. I know that for a fact.” She was so glad to hear Vanille laugh again. The house was too quiet with her hiding away from the world. “You best eat before your food gets cold.”

"Well, if you believe it, then... then I'll just hafta believe it, too," Vanille decided. She gave Belle another squeeze, then went to claim her plate, "Maybe we could eat together at the table."

“That would probably work out better.” Belle picked up her own plate and opened the door wider. “We’ll go out t’ a movie or somethin’ later if you want. That way you can get out again without havin’ to be around too many people.”

"Oh, Belle..." Vanille would have glomped the other woman again if there wasn't a plate of food in her hands, "You really are the best, you know? That's a great idea!"

“I know, sweetie. That’s why you love me.” She winked at Vanille and led the way out. “I’m just glad you’re feelin’ better.We all have stupid crap t’ deal with because of these dreams, I’d hate for it t’ get in the way of your life.”

"I just gotta remember that I have people in my life who can help me... even if they've got their own problems to handle, at least they can help cheer me up!" Vanille declared. She smooched Belle on the cheek, then started heading to the table, "Now let's eat!"