Zuko thinks that's rough, buddy (fireprincezuko) wrote in valarlogs, @ 2013-08-20 19:00:00 |
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Entry tags: | !complete, draco malfoy, pansy malfoy, zuko |
Who: The Malfoys
What: Fixing a body-swap problem with magic?
When: August 8 [during body swap plot]
Where: The Malfoy Apartment
Rating: Low
Status: Complete
When Zuko and Pansy had first told him what had happened it had occurred to him to use magic to fix it but then this Emma woman on the net claimed responsibility so he hadn’t thought to try. But they were on day 5 now and he really needed his husband back. And not just because he was as horny as hell. Though that was a factor. So he planned to suggest that they let him try.
It was definitely a factor. Probably right up there with Zuko whining about clothing and hair and how awful all of it was. He was basically just sitting on the couch in hiding as often as he could be, and today was only different in the fact that he was sitting next to himself (Pansy) and staring at Draco thoughtfully.
“You want to try what?”
Pansy was sitting with her arms folded across her chest--which was a lot easier to do without breasts in the way, btw--and was watching Draco with a suspicious expression on Zuko’s face. “I’m not so sure that’s a good idea.”
“I want to try and use magic to switch you back” Draco told his husband before looking at his sister, “Well it’s the only one I’ve got and I think it’s worth a try. I’m completely sick of this so you two must be. And nobody else seems to be doing anything about it”
Zuko, admittedly, knew nothing on the theory of magic. The only thing he knew about it at all was from what he’d seen Draco and Pansy do. “Huh,” he said, and furrowed brows that were not really his. Because he was his sister in law. Newsflash, in case no one had noticed before.
“Well. I mean. If you’ve got a plan, I guess I don’t see how it could hurt any more....” He really, really was sick of this.
“So long as we don’t get splinched.” Pansy said, frowning, and glancing between Draco and Zuko in her body. This was so weird. And she was going to eat salad for a week. Being with Peter had made her body a bit more soft.
“I don’t even know what spells you’d try.” She added, now sounding a little worried. She didn’t want to end up... losing an arm, or something.
“Well I was going to try the spell to stop other spells first, just in case it’s anything like that. Then if that didn’t work maybe an unsticking spell, which might release you enough that I can switch you back round and then I was going to get imaginative” Draco admitted with a shrug.
“Imaginative,” Zuko repeated, and was annoyed when his tone didn’t reach that too-low level of incredulous that he could manage in his own body. He shook his head, as if his own tone decided things. “Do it. Please. No offense, Pansy, but I don’t like being you.”
Pansy didn’t look all that reassured. But if Zuko was willing to try, it wasn’t like she could say no. And she didn’t want to say no, either, really. She wanted out of this body. As scary as it was.
“...All right. Just... if you kill me, I’m going to haunt you for the rest of your life.” She said in a very serious tone.
“Noted” Draco told her with a smirk, “It’s not really my aim to kill or maim either of you” he added before removing his wand from his back pocket. “Okay, so first Finite Incantatum” he said before performing the spell.
Zuko just waited. Because he wasn’t sure what else to do. He shifted his position on the couch until he was sitting on top of one of his feet and the other was pulled up close to his chest. Which was not his chest, because breasts. Awful.
Pansy waited, then turned to look at Zuko in her body and back to Draco. Nothing happened, that she could tell. “Well?” She said, shifting in her seat.
“Well looks like it’s not a spell then” Draco sighed, “Figured that would be too easy so unsticking spell next, I’m hoping to kind of unstick you from your bodies and then swap you around” he frowned, it sounded a lot less crazy when he didn’t say it out loud.
No, it sounded pretty nuts. Zuko wasn’t even sure he got it, but he remained hopeful anyway. If bodies were like shitty glue or tape or something then he supposed he’d be grateful just this one time. He chewed his (Pansy’s) bottom lip and rose expectant eyebrows. “You can do it,” he said, a little too encouragingly.
Pansy wasn’t really sure about all of this. She had a feeling that none of it was going to work. But she didn’t say it out loud. She just sat there, being slightly pessimistic, and watched her brother expectantly.
Next Draco tried Waddiwasi but all that happened was the magnets in the kitchen fell off the refrigerator, “Okay, so now we’re into made up territory” he sighed.
Pessimism seemed to suit Pansy pretty well in Zuko’s body, and pretty much no one was surprised about that, he was sure. In fact, Pansy was doing a pretty good job of looking exactly like Zuko might in general, and it wasn’t just the face.
Well. He supposed there was a reason they always got on pretty well.
“Nice magnet trick, anyway,” he said, but was feeling a little concerned now too. Made up territory sounded worrisome.
“It was worth a shot, I guess.” Pansy was also a bit irritable because she couldn’t do anything to help. She was useless in the FireBender’s body, without her magic and her wand. It was just a stick of wood with her in Zuko’s tall, skinny frame. (Well, taller and skinnier, anyway.)
“What do you have in mind?” She asked, wondering how creative her brother was going to have to get here.
“Try as many different latin words that mean swap as possible?” Draco suggested, “Worth a go right?” he said looking at them both but looking at Pansy mostly. She may not have her wand but she knew magic.
“...Do you actually know Latin?” Zuko seemed unsure now, shifting on the couch until he was sort of flopped over the arm of it. Dejected, like a cartoon character. “I don’t think this is working.”
“Most of the spells that we learned at Hogwarts were in Latin,” Pansy explained. “Or a weird, magical, bastardization of Latin. I don’t think anything he can come up with would do any harm, but it might not work.” She turned to look at her brother again. “...whatever you can think of. I’m at a loss.”
Draco nodded, “If it works it works but if not then it won’t do anything” that was his theory anyway. “Okay” he said pulling a piece of paper out of his pocket before holding out his wand, “permuto”
And then--! … Nothing happened. Zuko frowned. He was going to warp Pansy’s face permanently, and didn’t seem bothered by that fact at all. “Ah.” he said, dryly. “I think I feel different.”
“It’s a good try, Draco.” Pansy said, giving a little shrug. “I don’t feel any different, but that doesn’t mean...” She glanced over at Zuko, then back to Draco again. “You don’t have to stop trying.”
Draco nodded, determined. “Okay” he said, finding it sweet that she was encouraging him. “Transmuto” and this time something did happen. Pansy’s body was now dressed in Zuko’s clothes and vice versa. While somewhat amusing it hadn’t been what he was going for, “Bugger” he sighed.
Luckily, Zuko hadn’t really tried dressing in anything other than his own clothing anyway, so it was basically just like--- well. Nearly the same.
Zuko gave a sigh and a look that was not nearly as encouraging as Pansy was managing to be. He loved his husband and all, but he was allowed to be disparaging.
Pansy almost jumped when her clothes changed. She raised an eyebrow at Draco, then shifted and wiped her hands on her new pants. “...well, at least we’ve got the same taste in clothing.” She gave Zuko a bit of a smirk.
Draco frowned, “Something has to work” he said, close to whining but not quite there yet. “Okay I have a couple more words to try” he told them.
Deciding that pouting and sighing was getting them nowhere, Zuko only nodded and sunk into a posture that he liked to think might have been patient. It couldn’t be worse. Either something would work or they’d have more magnet or clothing mess ups, right?
“Okay.” Pansy said, glancing once more between Zuko and Draco. She really, really wanted a drink. A strong one.
He tried a couple more and nothing happened, he shrugged his shoulders, “Well, I still think it was worth a go” he said, “Maybe my magic just isn’t strong enough or I don’t know enough for it to work”
“Or maybe it’s just something that doesn’t work with your magic,” Zuko said, not unkindly. Draco shouldn’t blame himself for not being able to fix it. He licked his lips, glanced over at himself -er, Pansy, and shrugged. “Let’s just get drunk.”
Pansy opened her mouth to respond. There were things in their world that were immune to magic, and certain magics that protected from others. Perhaps this was one of them?
But then Zuko mentioned getting drunk. A little grin broke out across Pansy’s open mouth, and she spoke. “Now, that’s the best plan I’ve heard all day.”
Draco gave them both a small smile, "Okay that we can do with no magic needed" he said, "I guess the best we can do then is hope this doesn't last much longer."