InsaneJournal

Who: Weasley Twins + Theophilia Hotass Flowers
What: The twins did something for Theo.
When: 8/14
Where: Twins place. Theo's place.
Rating: R for handwaved sexy.
Status: Complete!





It was stupid early in the morning and the twins were excited for various reasons. One, they'd stayed up a good portion of the night working on something very important. Two, they were going to do that something very important today. Three, they actually had a wedding to stand up in later on in the day so they were going to both look very swank and have Theo there dressed up just as swank, except with way more cleavage and nicer curves.

Anyway.

Fred was both calling Theo on his phone and knocking at her door at the same time. Stupid early in the morning yes, but he knew she'd be up because she ran a bed and breakfast and who didn't get up at five AM when they ran a bed and breakfast?

She was wearing cutoff shorts and a bikini top when they came to the door. She’d already done her hair, just because she could wear hot rollers while puttering around in the kitchen. The result was long red hair in curls, looking vaguely regal, while the rest of her was ready for the beach.

Opening the door and answering the phone at the same time made Theo giggle. “Hi, Fred! How’re you likin’ your body again?”

"Aw, you know, already?" Hanging up his phone, Fred pouted, but really for only the shortest of moments. It did, of course, occur to him that caller ID might have given it away. He leaned forward, pressed an excited kiss to her lips and let himself in.

"And you know. It’s about the same.” Which it was. That body swap thing had been a good time. “You're looking a proper kind of attractive," he told her with an eyebrow waggle.

“Y’all know I can tell y’all apart. I know you hate it, but I can’t help it.” She put her phone in her back pocket, wrapping her arms around his shoulders and kissing him. “Well, thank you, I appreciate the compliment. What’re you doin’ up so early, anyway?”

Not able to help himself (despite his near one minded excitedness), Fred stole a few more kisses, and then bit playfully at Theo's neck.

"Doing. A thing! With stuff. Hey, we need to commandeer a closet. Like, possibly one you don't use much?" He was practically vibrating with energy -- he’d been a lot brighter in mood than usual (which was saying a lot) since George had started dreaming, too.

She sighed at the nibbles, but his request was odd. “Well, there’s my mom’s chest of drawers in my bedroom. I only use it to keep winter clothes in, but since I live here, it’s mostly just to remind me of Mama.” She ran her fingers through his hair, smiling a little more lopsidedly. “What’re you gonna do to it?” That wasn’t precognition; that was knowing Fred.

Fred pulled his phone back out and texted furiously for a moment, frowning as he waited only a second for an answer, before he stuck it back in his pocket and then gave a thoughtful sort of nod. And then he rose his eyebrows at Theo. "Oh. Head pettings. More, please." Distracted much, Fred?

Yes, actually.

"I said already. We're doing a thing. You might wanna move your winter clothes. Like. For forever, or whatever."

Scritching a bit at his scalp, she enjoyed the way he tended to get distracted when she touched him. “Okay. I could always donate ‘em to Goodwill or somethin’, it’s not like I’ll ever use ‘em.”

"Well, you don't hafta get rid of them, just move them." Fred said it flippantly, because hey, you never knew when you'd need a good jumper or whatever. Even in this weather. Then again, all she really had to do was stick around with him and George for a while more and his mum'd be knitting her something every winter anyway.

"You're gonna love this," he said, grabbing her hand mid scritch and leading her into her own bedroom. "Seriously." a pause, as he looked around, "this one, here? The Wardrobe?" He opened it as if taking note of size and width. "Oh, yeah. Perfect."

She giggled when he tugged her toward the bedroom, wondering what exactly they were going to do in or with her closet. She figured they were going to put a false bottom on it or something for pranks, especially if they knew that Percy was having a wedding here. “Well, let me move the clothes, then.”

A couple of jackets and sweaters later, she had everything tidy and stored in her own closet. “Okay, what now?”

"Now," Fred said, sounding a bit prim (for him) as well as distracted. "Now you go find something else to do for a while, while me an' George do some work." He was already pulling his phone out again, and getting really into peeking into the wardrobe as if he might find something more in there.

It wouldn't be too hard, they'd been experimenting with doors in their own place for the better half of the week, but that didn't mean it didn't take some concentration. Plus this was a way longer distance. The twins, however, were nothing if not dedicated to their craft.

She chuckled to herself, shaking her head and stripping out of her shorts. She had a little black dress to get into and makeup to apply if they were going somewhere later.

For a while, Fred fiddled, talking to George on his phone, the cell pressed between shoulder and cheek and his wand out and at the ready.

He murmured little words and flicked his wand now and then before going back to his phone, or occasionally looking over his shoulder to see what Theo was up to. The little black dress was distracting, but not in a bad way. Later he and George would make the game more even by getting into their waistcoats. God, they'd be irresistible.

Finally, he blinked, pushed away from the wardrobe and closed its doors before sitting back on his heels.

"I think it's done," he said, sounding delighted.

“You think what’s done?” She was pinning her hair into an updo, letting a few tendrils fall a bit around her face. She turned to look at him over her shoulder, smiling as she buckled the strap to a heel.

"Kay," he said to his phone and then hung it up, standing up with a look-no-hands necessary sort of motion. "C'mere," he said, and offered her his hand. "You're gonna like this, promise."

And the George literally walked out of her wardrobe, looking entirely too smug.

As he should have.

The fact that they both clapped in delight probably lack showmanship, but fuck you they’re awesome.

It was probably a good thing that she hadn’t yet put on lipstick. Her jaw dropped a little and she all but ran over to George, wrapping her arms around him and snogging him harder than she’d ever snogged either of them. “Y’all are brilliant!”

"We are brilliant," Fred agreed while George got his mouth all bruised up and seemed more than pleased about it. "Try it out," he urged when he thought maybe his brother might need to breathe. "Walk through!"

“You thought of this when I was sad we’d never be able to move in together, huh.” Theo grinned, then opened up the huge wardrobe. She trusted their magic inherently, and figured this would be as good a time as ever to let them know she was starting to know things she shouldn’t know. And just like that, she was in their room, which prompted her to giggle again as she sat down on their bed.

She wondered if they had time for a quickie before they had to leave.

"We might have," Fred agreed, grabbing George's hand and walking through the wardrobe to follow her as if they were just walking into a different room of the same house. Which now, kind of, they were. "Seems fitting, you know? Since we both've got our--businesses and all." They both beamed, bright smiles that were just as pleased as smug.

“All the extra space, no need to spend gas on visits all for the price of closet storage.”

“And I can crawl into bed with y’all when I have nightmares?” She smiled, crossing her legs and leaning back. “I miss y’all sometimes, you know. Then I worry I’m gettin’ clingy and stay home on purpose and make too many pies.”

"You can crawl into bed even when you don't have nightmares," George said, giving her a nearly puzzled look that clearly said 'lady, you are sort of crazy, but we are tolerating it because it is also kind of adorable and how do you feel about that?'. He plopped down on the bed next to her.

"We like pie an' all, but you shoulda just been comin' over," Fred agreed, rummaging through the clothes they'd laid out on their extra bed in order to clear out the closet. Wouldn't do to have to iron things before this wedding.

She crossed her legs and bit her lower lip. “I just don’t want to ruin a good thing by bein’ clingy. I haven’t dated since I got divorced, and it’s been a while. I know y’all haven’t dated many girls and wow, really, just the one?” She blinked, realizing she’d been leaning against George.

That reminded her of wanting to tell them. “So, I can do ... psychic things now.”

"Just the ---one?" They both repeated in question, hazel brown eyes turning toward Theo.

Fred rose an eyebrow. "Wait, what?"

“Y’all only dated one girl before me, right?” She bit her lower lip. “I um. Have these premonitions. And when I touch people, sometimes I know things ‘bout ‘em I have no reason to know. Like when I saw your brother the other day, I just touched his hand and I knew that he was mad about raspberry anything.”

The twins looked a little flustered over that at first. Fred scratched the back of his neck, and George tilted his head to the side curiously.

"Yeah." They both said, and then Fred laughed. "Just the one, actually. It's true."

Hey, in their defense, there weren't a lot of really cool chicks who wanted to date a set of twins who may or may not pull practical jokes constantly.

"That's really cool, actually." George said and then pressed close. "What am I thinking right now?"

“Pushup bra,” Theo smiled. “The answer to your question is I’m wearin’ a pushup bra.” She shrugged. “It’s the dreams.”

"Damn," Fred said.

"You're good," George finished. Fred had clearly been thinking it, too. Which was actually probably telling, considering.

"Reminds us of divination. You're not gonna start warning people about omens and junk, are you?"

“Of course I wouldn’t. But I did know that one of the people from my dreams had something horrible happen. I texted her to see if she was all right, and her parents were murdered.” Theo sighed, leaning against George more heavily. “But I know which of you is older.” She didn’t let on that Percy had told her.

It was fair to assume that some things from the dreams bled over here. If the twins had to be honest, they did kind of get chatty and friendly with a guy who in their dreams was possibly an evil murdered. So that was kinda weird. He seemed nice here, though.

They both puzzled over her next admission though. "That can't be mind reading," Fred said, crossing his arms.

"Since we don't even know." George finished, like always.

A pause.

"Who?"

“George.” Theo looked at Fred and smiled. “Only by a minute or so.”

"Really?" The twins glanced at each other, skeptical, before turning back to her and shrugging, like, you know, it's cool info but it doesn't matter much twenty three years after the fact. "How do you know?"

“Someone who knows your mama told me.” She ran her fingers over Fred’s hand, pulling him closer to her. “Are y’all gonna be mad I’m harder to hoodwink?” She’d be more difficult to prank, and she knew how much they loved that.

Fred wrinkled his nose, but squished himself between George and her. “Percy knew this whole time and never told us? That prat.”

George snickered because clearly he was older and could do that now.

“We won’t be mad. You’re already kinda hard to mess with anyway.” And they wouldn’t say so, but they rather just enjoyed being nice to Theo anyway. She laughed at all their worst jokes.

“Y’all know he’s havin’ his weddin’ here, right?” Theo smiled, already excited to help Percy on his big day. She wrapped her arms around Fred’s waist, kissing along his neck. “Tonks and I are gonna team up soon to play tricks on y’all. She’s cute. I wondered if she’d ever fancied one’a you and she looked like she was gonna hurl.” Theo had liked her immediately.

They both laughed at that, bright near barks of noises. “No way,” Fred said.

“She’s like a sister,” George went on.

“Weasley clan, all that.” But they’d have to be on the lookout now, for pranks from their friend. Psychics and magic could only mean trouble. Clearly they enjoyed that thought.

Fred wriggled and then pulled Theo onto his lap, and half on George as well, and the boys smiled pleasantly. “Do we get to plan anything fun for Percy? Spike the punch?”

They wondered, also, how well her hair was held, because sex would be awesome, but wedding pictures lasted forever and that was sad.

“You can spike the punch only ‘cause I was gonna do that anyway and make the punch sangria. Y’all can do a fireworks show or somethin’. That’s fun and romantic,” she smiled. She kissed Fred gently, stroking his cheek.

They might have griped more, but even if Percy was neither fun nor romantic, they weren’t about to actually ruin their brother’s wedding. Particularly if their girlfriend was planning it.

“Yeah, yeah,” they both said, and then George pointedly considered the little alarm clock by the bed.

“Didja use a lot of hairspray or something?”

“No, but I brought a brush, why? Are you going to try to redo my hair?” She knew what they were getting at, but couldn’t help but play coy. It was way more fun.

“You’re an awful woman,” they both told her, but she knew what they really meant, which was not what they’d said, but something else completely.

Obviously.

Theo batted her eyelashes at them, then tugged Fred down into a kiss. “Y’all like it,” she beamed. Which made her happy. She was stupid in love with the two boys, and hoped they knew it.

They weren’t really blind to it! They had, in fact, just spent a good portion of all their free hours figuring out an insanely difficult magic spell just to be closer to her on a constant basis. Admittedly, they would probably also use the portal for evil (she had a fridge to raid, too!), it was mostly for good.

“Of course we do,” George said, even as Fred pulled her closer for another kiss.

“We’re going to wreck all your hard work of getting ready now.”

“It wasn’t that hard,” she chuckled. She held up a dainty ankle to George so he could undo the strap on her shoes, lest she give someone a stiletto where they didn’t want one in an intimate moment.

That would be terrible and tragic. George set to work accordingly, fingers nimble on the thin straps. Stilettos were hot, by the way, good job Theo.

“That’s cool,” Fred was saying even as he moved to see if there were any more fastenings that he might undo on her dress. It was clear they were still riding high on their magical accomplishment, proud and buzzing with pleasure.

Theo purred when she touched Fred, closing her eyes. She got memories when they touched, and she got what he was thinking about. “Fred, you’re a damn pervert and I love you for it.” She bit her lower lip, shivering a little.

They might not ever get used to that, but they couldn't say they didn't like it. Fred only laughed, calling to mind the dirtiest thing he could think of before leaning Theo over properly to kiss her like he fucking meant it. Which he always did, but this time it was with a message. And that was fairly awesome, wasn't it?

She liked that they’d never have to be saps around her. She’d never have to be that needy woman who wanted her man to tell her they loved her, to tell her sweet little nothings in her ear. Theo just knew. She knew Fred and George adored her, had worked hard on the portal from her place to theirs, and she could’ve almost cried from how happy she was. “You boys are little angels, y’know that?”

“Nah,” said George, but they both seemed happy about it anyway -- taking the compliment at the same time as they took her dress. They very well might have been angels though, considering they were kind enough to not just let it fall on the floor in a messed heap, instead settling it by their waistcoats and suits.

The twins in waistcoats was going on the very long list of things that Theo loved about her boyfriends. She couldn’t help but giggle once they were all naked, toes curling as she crawled over to kiss George. God bless lip stain; it didn’t smudge.

They probably wouldn't have minded, even if it did. The twins weren't exactly offended at the idea of looking messy or unmasculine at the best of times. They just were, and they were okay with that, proud to be.

George kissed back, happy to do so, even as Fred decided that he could put his tongue to other uses in other places. Look, they were pretty generous dudes.