“You have to choose your own path..." Who: Thor Odinson, Dani Moonstar What: Getting Coffee, Thor is a big reassuring teddy bear man. When: After this private message. Where: A cafe in Irvine. Ratings/Warnings: PG-13 for mentions of drinking problems and (non-character) death. Possible trigger warnings for alcoholism in general. Status: Complete!
This was a first as far as Dani could remember. She’d never had coffee with Thor Odinson over in the dream world, and she certainly couldn’t say she’d ever had his attention in real life. Seen his various films and things, of course, but not this.
She wondered if he’d recognize her, though, as the woman who’d been seen on that scandalous date with Natasha last year. It was easy to forget how small the world actually was. Dani wasn’t sure that he’d mind. He really just seemed like a gigantic asgardian teddy bear to her. At least, that was her impression in his messages.
Dani got herself a coffee and took a seat in one of the booths. She’d arranged for this coffee date somewhere in Irvine, since it was centrally located. It was a small coffee shop with cheap prices, which was good because her wallet pretty much had moths in it.
Thor broke out into a smile when he saw her. He had come to the cafe on one of his newest possessions, a motorcycle custom made for him, with some advanced safety features and bells and whistles. One of a type he would be riding in his new movie. When the company had discovered he liked it, and discovered he had a motorcycle license, he had been presented with one, with the agreement he would use it at least once a month leading up to and during his movie’s release.And that was something he had no problem agreeing to.
“Dani! Hello!” He shucked his leather jacket and his helmet as he came in, and moved toward her, otherwise wearing new jeans and a t-shirt that bespoke the legend that Asgardians Knew How to Cook. He gestured at the waitress and soon a carafe of coffee was arriving at the table, about as he did, along with a plate of various danishes.
“It’s good to meet you.” He settled down and extended his hand, pushing the plate to the middle of the table as he did so.
"It's good to meet you too," Dani replied, reaching out her hand to shake his. Her own handshake was strong, and it was clear that she'd had a lot of practice with that sword she'd mentioned on the network.
She'd been a little nervous about this meeting, but now that he'd arrived she couldn't help but crack a grin. He really was like a gigantic teddy bear. She almost wanted to hug him, "This is a generous array of pastries, I hope I'm not going to be eating them by myself."
Shaking her hand, he could feel the calluses and the strength there, and he smiled. His respect for her increased as he did so and as she spoke. “Not at all. I was hoping you would break bread with me, so to speak.” He liked old rituals, and breaking bread was one of the oldest. A guest and a host or even two guests who broke bread swore to not do harm to the other while their guesting lasted.
"I will definitely break bread with you. It would be rude not to, and these look delicious besides," Dani replied, with a grin. She looked the pastries over and selected one that looked like a monster version of a bear claw, then pulled it over to a napkin.
“They do appear delicious, yes.” He selected an apple fritter and took a bite, swallowed, then eyed her. She was a proud woman, a strong woman, and a woman with a past. She seemed hesitant to him, but he was not sure. He nodded to himself before he spoke.
“How are you feeling?”
His words and his look carried weight, and he was not asking simply how she felt, but how she was truly feeling.
This was harder than having a conversation with Scott Summers, Dani decided. She darted her eyes to the side and took a bite from her bear claw, chewing for a bit while she tried to decide what to say.
Well, it was basically a choice between telling the truth or a half truth. She wrinkled her nose, "I'm nervous. You're very good at putting people off guard. Like a gigantic teddy bear, actually. I'm kind of scared we're going to end this conversation with me sobbing all over you while you pat my back with your gigantic Asgardian hands."
Thor nodded. “I’m not a teddy bear, really, but would it be so bad, if it did end so?” He cocked his head to look at her, and hmmed, putting the apple fritter down. “I will not judge you, Dani Moonstar. I will not be the one to tell you how you should act. I am here because you are a person I believe in.”
His voice was a low rumble as he spoke, like far off thunder coming closer. Not a warning, but a natural thing.
"It might be a bad thing, yes," Dani replied, tilting her head off to the side a bit, "I'm not one for making a scene in public. Or I wasn't. I've actually been... very much not myself for the last few months."
She put her danish down and poked at it, "Someone I cared about died, and I fell apart over it. I left, and started drinking. Worse, I left someone behind, here, who I cared about. I loved him. When he came after me it didn't end well, and the drinking really only got worse after that."
She took a deep breath, let it out, and sipped her coffee.
Thor nodded slowly. “Sometimes, we must become what we are truly, in order to survive that which would destroy all we know and love.” His voice was soft, then, and knowing, and he spoke with the weight of someone who had known sorrow.
“A pain that is hard to get past, made worse by the way things happened. I am sorry, Dani. Such a thing is never easy, for anyone. And you seem to bear it well, for all the pain you have seen. You speak, and breathe, and you are here. That speaks well of you.”
"I very nearly wasn't speaking, or breathing. I honestly don't know how I survived all of that at all," Dani replied, her voice a bit hoarse. His words hit her in places that made emotions immediately rise to the surface. She hated when she felt vulnerable, but that other side of her, the less pragmatic one, thought with Thor it was probably safe enough.
"... A lot of things happened. Things I'm not proud of. They say you have to hit bottom before you realise you have a problem, and my bottom was so far underneath the kind of woman I want to be that I'm not sure I've crawled out of it yet, even after three months of treatment. I don't want to talk about that. What happened, I mean. I know I have to face it. I know I have to face the people I left behind. I just don't think I'm ready yet."
“You do not have to. And it you are not ready to, you should not.” He nodded to her. “Sometimes we make mistakes so foul, we carry their weight, partially, forever. I set my world to war with impetuous actions, and nearly led to the death of my people and of another race, an entire world. I drew Earth into the fire as well and my actions led to the deaths of thousands, though indirectly, and with much help from those of malicious intent.” He spoke softly, passionately, and openly, his face showing sorrow and pain at what he spoke, but determination.
“Sometimes, the only way we can move forward, move out of the darkness of our mistakes is simply to start walking. Not for the purpose of being forgiven, not to be a hero, or a person who everyone will respect or like, Simply to be ourselves again. And that takes time.” He took one of her hands and held it gently.
“I cannot and have not been able to be who and what I am without those who give me faith, friendship, and love. You will find you gather them along your walk, and you will wonder why they believe in you, why they bother, when you are broken. And yet, they do and will. So I say to you simply this; so long as you walk this path, so long as you willingly try to move forward, you wlll not have to do so alone.”
Thunder rolled far off at his words, and lightning crackled around his eyes and he nodded.
For a while, Dani wasn't even sure what to say. Thor's words had stunned her into silence. The man was as intense in his emotions as he was generous and kind. It was rare to come across someone like that, and being in his presence was extremely humbling.
It figured, really. She was in the presence of a God after all.
Her hand squeezed his, and she nodded her head slightly, "I would like that... to do that... to walk and keep walking and not be doing it alone."
Tears threatened to rim her eyes, and she bit on her lip. She didn't want to cry. She was still convinced she didn't deserve to feel any amount of self pity over this, and to her, crying was weak.
Thor smiled softly. “The first step in my estimation is being able to let yourself be human, Dani. You cannot move forward if you are tied to the past by your inability to move.” And he moved around the table, and gently, carefully, took her into his arms.
If it was anyone else, she probably would have fought him on it. Dani wasn't really the touchy-feely type any more than she was the cry in public type, and after the last few months that was even more true.
Maybe because it was Thor, maybe because she just really needed it, she let him hug her. In fact, she hugged him back.
"Thank you..." She whispered. Her voice was hoarse with tears she still wouldn't admit to.
“Of course, my friend. What else are friends for?” He simply held her, and nodded, stroking her back as he would any friend, even his lady. And he dared anyone to call Natasha weak to her face. Or behind her back, really.
He nodded to her and pulled back slowly.
“You have to choose your own path, but you will find you will not be alone on it. Sometimes, you must find a community. A tribe.” The Norse believed in tribes as well.
Dani nodded her head. She'd lost a lot of the tribe she'd grown up with, even before she'd traveled here the first time. The lack of family in her life had left a hole, one that hadn't been easily filled, even with Obi-wan in her life.
The X-men had been her new tribe in the dream world. Scott was trying so hard to make her feel welcomed now that she was back. Maybe she needed to let a few more people in, "Yes. I think you're right."
He smiled as he sat back. “The Norse have an old custom, one I think some of the tribes of Americans also hold to. Blood adoption. Would you be willing, milady, to walk with me in the way of blood, to choose to join families, and faiths, and to choose to be siblings, by blood, by choice, by hope?”
"It's an honor even to be asked, but... That's something I would want to put a little thought into. It's no small decision, what you're offering." Dani sipped at her coffee thoughtfully. It was something to work for. A clear goal, beyond sobriety and trying to mend things.
"I wouldn't mind joining your family, but to be your sister... It can't just be because I need your support. I want to be someone capable of offering something in return. I hope you understand. Give me a little time."
“Of course.” He smiled to her and nodded. A wise answer, and one that showed she was far more put together than she, perhaps, knew. He listened to her.
“I understand. And it is a good answer. Perhaps, sometime, we will adventure together. This place definitely provides enough adventures.”
He smiled wider. “What will you do, to acclimate, here?”
"Well... right now, I'm working at the Ranch. Not so much working, actually, as..." Dani searched for the word. Volunteering didn't seem to quite fit, though the money she'd have earned pretty much went back to Wrex and in return he made sure she wasn't starving.
Indentured servitude made both Wrex and her sound bad, "Volunteering full time. And I... go to meetings."
“Good. Support is good. Hmmm. Volunteering there, you know young Billy Batson then? I understand he volunteers in the admin building there.” Thor chuckled. “I had chance to meet him during the War at Martha’s Vineyard.”
"I might have come across him a few times. I haven't really gotten to know everyone yet, there are a lot of new faces around. What's this about a War on Martha's Vineyard?"
Dani sat back in her chair a bit, deciding now was a great time to nibble more on her bear claw.
“One of the wedding attempts of Tony Stark and Pepper Potts. It was interrupted when the area was invaded by thousands of Orcs, Ring Wraiths, Oliphaunts, and other foul things. The war lasted three and a half days.”
His voice was soft, and sadness and tiredness filled it.
'One of' sounded like there'd been many wedding attempts. Dani raised her eyebrows as Thor spoke, wondering how many times those two had tried this now. That guy didn't seem to ever get a break.
Orcs and Ringwraiths sounded like some fantasy books had invaded. Or those movies, the ones with all the walking. She questioned, not for the first time, her life choices when it came to returning to Orange County. Shit had definitely 'gotten real' in her absence.
"... That's... Pretty crazy. At least it only lasted three days."
Thor nodded. “Aye. And we got most out quickly. Twas a war of containment as much as anything else.” He smiled softly as he sat back, and devoured, in several neat actions, his apple fritter.
“Despite that, the last year has held many good things. I am married, and that came out of tragedy twice over. I am starring in two movies, and that came out of nearly dying under the thumb of a Sentinel. THe OC has many crazy things happening, but I would not live anywhere else.” Of that he was sure and his certainty shone in his eyes.
"You married Natasha, right? I'm not sure if I heard that correctly or not. We used to be friends before I left. I'm glad she's got someone like you to treat her right." Dani grinned a bit. Natasha was a great person and she'd been so lonely when Dani had left that it was a shame, really.
She wrinkled her nose as she sipped her coffee, "People have questioned my sanity since I got back, even me. But this place is... well, it's not going to ever be boring, anyway."
“I did. She surprised me and proposed to me, then we eloped. We’ll have a big ceremony this fall, but we wanted to be tied together in that way.” They had been bound by heart and soul before that, but it meant something to them both. And he nodded to her words, grinning wider.
“Never boring at all. Dragons and orcs and terrorists oh my....” His eyes danced as he paraphrased the old saying. “And friends, who will not desert you. That too.” He nodded again, eyes warm as he spoke it.
"That last one is probably the most important, considering the first three." Dani laughed one of the first laughs she'd laughed in a while, and toasted him with her coffee, "Here's to friends who are crazy enough to stick by your side through Dragons, Orcs, and Terrorists."
Thor raised his own cup and toasted her in return. “To friends. New, and old.” And he drank. For after all, friendship was important to him, too. And having a new friend in Dani? That was a very good thing. In His opinion,anyway.