InsaneJournal

Who: Fred and George Weasley + Twins
What: Vacation, kinda.
When: Weekend of June 22nd
Where: Hotel room!
Rating: PG-13. Nudity's there, but not sex.
Status: Complete



They hadn't gone anywhere fancy -- not even anywhere really out of town. The decision to get the time off was too spur of the moment for the twins, and they hadn't really had much time to make proper plans (they did, after all, only have one teenaged employee and one disgustingly moody pregnant one. It wasn't easy to just take time off). They doubted Theo would mind much that they'd just picked the nicest hotel they could feasibly afford for the weekend. It was on the beach, so that had to count for something.

Anyway, it was good it was kind of close by, because deciding who was going to ride in the backseat when there were three of them was always the oddest thing.

"It's got a hot tub in the room. That's cool, right?" Fred was chattering (he always kind of felt the need to impress Theo, and rather went out of his way to do so) even as George returned from checking in, room key card in hand.

Theo had ridden in the backseat, dangling her feet out the window. “That is cool,” she grinned, looking up at Fred. Theo didn’t really feel like they needed to impress her at all. It was obvious she’d been impressed from the moment she’d met them. Wearing a t-shirt from the high school she’d graduated from (and yes, she was proud she still fit into it) and a pair of jeans, her red hair was in pigtails. It was an outfit that should’ve made her look innocent, but did nothing of the sort.

“Y’all should let me help pay some, though. It was kinda my idea.”

She kind of looked innocent! In the same way that barely eighteen porn stars looked innocent, anyway. Which was to say, not at all, but it was pretty damn hot.

Not that the twins watched porn. Jeez.

“You can get dinner,” George said, because he was practical like that. “S’this way. Fourth floor.” Elevators were the creation of both god and man. Yes.

“Sorry to have torn you away from your jam making,” Fred said, in a way that really just said he wasn’t sorry at all.

“That’s a good compromise,” she smiled, walking with him toward the elevator. She couldn’t help but stick her tongue out at Fred, though. “Hey, now. Y’all love m’jam. You can’t eat it if you’re gonna tease me about it!”

George pressed the button for the proper floor once they were in the elevator. Since there were no other people in it beside them, the twins both grinned in that dual cheshire way of theirs. “Was jam a euphemism?”

“What? No. What would it - ohhhh.” She giggled. “You’ve had my literal jam made from berries before. Stop thinkin’ with your willies!” Not that she cared, especially since she’d tugged Fred into a snog.

Sometimes they did things like that just to get a rise out of her. Which everyone here seemed fine with, and it worked how it was meant to. George tittered out a giggle, and Fred happily kissed her back, hands on her waist and all that general goodness.

The elevator dinged open and George stepped out of it with a skip in his step as he browsed door numbers. “Snog later, room nowww.”

“What, can’t y’all kiss and walk at the same time? What’d they teach you boys in your schools?” She wrinkled her nose as she stopped kissing, but walked with them hand in hand as they looked for their room number.

“We musta dropped out before them real important parts,” George said, affecting her accent rather poorly.

Fred laughed at that, even as he pointed with his free hand to the door with their number on it. “But you can teach us, if you really think we oughta know.”

For George’s insolence, he’d get snogwalked. She kissed him and managed to put the cardkey into the door lock, open it, and still move backward into the room. She may have just been gifted.

Really, she was. Which was good, since George was not so much, and her giftedness stopped him from tangling limbs and just falling straight over. Really, though, it was kind of nice and a bit exciting and he was sure he wanted to practice at it a bit more. Although, not all the time, because that seemed a little silly.

Fred only shook his head and poked about the room thoughtfully.

Once Theo was on the bed, breathing hard, she looked around as well. “Oh, this really is nice! Are y’all tryin’ to impress me or somethin’? Because if you want to pull off a bank heist or somethin’ like that, I’m in.” That had always just sounded fun.

She was kidding. Mostly.

“We’d make the worst bank robbers,” Fred said -- he was standing in the middle of the currently empty hot tub, as if just trying to get a feel for it’s existence.

“We really would,” George agreed, nuzzling closer to her, and offering little kisses to her neck line. “We’d all make out in stacks of money and get caught.”

“The hair would give us away,” Theo purred, snuggling into George’s touches and stroking his cheek affectionately. “Better we just roll around up here, I suppose.” She wasn’t sure how she’d grown so fond of them, but there she was.

To their credit, they were very likable. In a boyishly charismatic sort of way. Or something. “Woe. We shall have to just roll in the richness that is emotion and feeling, in that case.” Fred went for overly dramatic (like he was wont to do), while George giggled -- even whilst he rubbed his face against her hand like some kind of overly pleased puppy.

Theo chose that moment to smile and be affectionate. “I really like y’all. Like ... a lot. Thanks for doin’ this. I never thought I’d date again, much less have a really sweet boyfriend. And two is just ... yeah.” She was blushing a little. Rolling in the richness that is emotion and feeling indeed, take that Fred.

The boys straightened up a bit, eyebrows raised in a way that came off as curiously interested. Fred stepped out of the hot tub in order to move over and sit on the opposite side of her than George. “We like you too,” they both said it at once.

“You deserve all the nice things you can get,” George went on. He wasn’t even making a joke, he just really meant it.

“I just wanted y’all to know you’re more’n a fling or me just using you for awesome sex.” She leaned against George, taking Fred’s hand. “Y’all make me happy. I hope I do the same f’r you.”

They’d never even considered the concept that they were being used for anything. The Twins were both well aware of the fact that they were not the easiest of choices when it came to dating. They were a little silly, rarely mature when they didn’t have to be, and they were -- well. Themselves, really.

“Of course you do,” George said, sounding a little surprised, even as he wrapped his arms around her waist.

“If you didn’t, and we thought you weren’t really interested, we wouldn’t bother.” Fred was always a little more straight to the point. “It’s not as if we were just lonely for company.” Which was true -- but Theo did sort of round things out into a nice feeling of completeness for them, although, like most things dealing with relationships, they were unsure of how to put it properly into words.

“I’m just sayin’ that I wasn’t expectin’ myself to be as fond of you as I am. I miss y’all when you’re gone. I’m happier around y’all than I’ve been in ten years.” She kissed Fred’s fingertips. “I’ve got the best boyfriends in the whole damn state, and I’m proud of it.”

Fred’s grin was crooked but pleased and he petted the back of his knuckles against her cheek.

“We are pretty awesome,” George said, kissing her cheek. “But we’re just trying to keep up with the best girlfriend ever, y’know.” They really did like her an awful darn lot.

That made Theo go a bit pink. “So, how’s the hot tub, Fred?” She shivered when they both touched her, happy gooseflesh breaking out over her arms.

“Empty, currently.” But Fred had a look on that said they could certainly remedy that if she felt so inclined.

“Big enough for three people, at least.” George noted. “We made sure.”

“Did you ask?” Theo giggled, imagining the poor scandalized desk clerk.

They grinned, wicked and awful all on purpose. “We did.” Someone had been scandalized, indeed.

That made Theo giggle, and she stood up to go flop in the still-empty hot tub. “Yeah, we should be able to fit in here. I bet you anythin’ that they think we’re filmin’ a porno in here.”

“Fuck,” Fred snapped his fingers.

“The camera,” lamented George, flopping down further until his head was rested in Theo’s lap.
“We knew we forgot something.”

The laugh that erupted from Theo wasn’t ladylike at all. It was a delighted, loud belly laugh that made her kick her feet a little. “Isn’t that what cell phones are for anyway?”

“Cell phones don’t come with a handy tripod,” Fred pointed out, but was mostly just pleased and amused at the laugh she’d just given. It’d basically been the most adorable thing he’d seen all day. Which was saying a lot because George had been pouting pretty cutely earlier.

“Also, clearly, you can’t record a feature length film on a phone.” George’s tone was very ‘get with the program’, even as he rolled off the the bed and Theo’s lap in order to go poke around with the tub. It wasn’t any use to them empty, after all.

“You know, they sell tripods for cell phones now,” Theo grinned. She watched them move before stretching out and flopping on the bed. “Not that I have one or anything.”

“Of course you don’t.” Fred agreed with a little giggle, even as he kicked his flip flop sandals off.

“And why would you?” George went on, fussing with the water spray and whatever else all those little knobs were.

She toed off her own sandals. “It seems silly. If you’re gonna get a tripod, get a real camera too, dangit.” She moved to help George with the dials, making sure to set the water nice and warm. What was the point of a hot tub if it wasn’t hot?

There wasn’t one. And a cold tub just sounded stupid. Or possibly was just called a pool. While they fiddled, Fred saw no reason not to just strip down and get in. Really, he wasn’t the most patient of people. George just fondly rolled his eyes.

“Our little sister wants to have a Fourth of July party,” he said, changing the subject completely.

“That sounds fun. I bet y’all are the sort to have sparklers, huh.” She didn’t question the notion of Brits having a Fourth of July party; the point was really just to grill meat and light things on fire. “Just don’t lose any limbs. I can’t put those back on.”

They’d questioned the notion themselves. But then decided after a moments’ thought that they were technically American anyway, and they quite liked a party for no reason. Lighting things on fire really did help.

“We wouldn’t lose limbs. Maybe just digits.” Just a missing finger or two never hurt anyone! “Gin wants fireworks.” George was half muffled as he removed his t-shirt.

“Which we’re normally okay with, but if we’re using our mum’s place for it....” Even Fred looked a little concerned over the idea of facing the wrath of his mother if they were to accidentally set a fire.

“I’ll be sure to watch you lot.” Theo rolled her eyes as she took off her own t-shirt. “I swear, havin’ red hair sorta makes y’all think I’m an impromptu cousin or somethin’, doesn’t it?”

The boys burst out into loud, obnoxious giggles over that one.

“That’s terrible -” Fred started, but couldn’t seem to finish.

“ --we’d never date a cousin. Gross.” George wiped away an imaginary tear from laughing.

Theo just stuck out her tongue and wiggled out of her jeans. “Guess that’s my Virginia showin’, huh.”

“Must be it,” Fred agreed, making little splashes in the water, even as he watched both Theo and George undress.

“No other explanation.” George wriggled out of cargo shorts and then hissed happily when he stepped into the tub. “Ooh.”

Eventually, Theo sunk into the water with a quiet hiss. “This is ... really really nice.” She moved so she was between them, leaning against them both. “Y’all did really, really good. I feel like I should thank you or somethin’.”

Y’all. The twins still clearly got a kick out of that word, considering they lit up every single time she said it. They’d gotten a little better at not commenting on it constantly though.

Instead, they preened a bit, looking smug and proud at the same time. “Well, you know,”

“We try.” Really, they kind of did. Not for everyone, but definitely for her. “We take thanks in the form of kisses.”

She smiled, moving to kiss Fred first, settling in his lap and sighing when a jet ran over her back. “Know I’m gonna get called a cougar for datin’ y’all, but I couldn’t care a bit.” Really, when your boyfriends were gorgeous identical twins, could anyone be bothered to care what other people thought of them?

George tsked a little, clearly disagreeing with the sentiment. “No one oughta be calling you old. You just tell us if anyone’s bothering you about it,” he said, “We’ll set ‘em straight.” They exactly weren’t fighters, either of them, but they were creepily intimidating sometimes, and that really did count for something.

Fred had no proper words for all that, more intent on creeping his fingers around Theo’s waist and kissing her quite properly.

“Sweethearts, the both of you,” she purred. She liked snogging both of them, but there was something even cosier and comfier than kissing them on a bed or a sofa.

It was definitely a nice change of pace -- not that everything still wasn’t a bit new for the three of them -- but there was something to be said for not falling into a routine. Fred nibbled at her lips between kisses, and George settled his hand in a spot where it touched both Fred and Theo’s legs, kissing at the small of her back and licking the water from it.

That made Theo outright shiver, and she gasped, leaning back against George, whimpering quietly. Sometimes she felt badly, like she’d gotten in between whatever perfect, wonderful thing they had, but then they did sweet things like this. If they wanted her there, she belonged there - or so she told herself.

They liked her there. Fred and George were good together -- but thought everything was a little more fun with Theo. Like she fit, and that was good because sometimes the Twins were entirely too complacent with what they had alone.

Mindful of water levels and flexibility and what have you, George leaned her back enough to steal kisses of his own while Fred nibbled and kissed at her stomach. Really, this had been a good choice.

Oh. Oh, that was nice. Theo tangled damp fingers in George’s hair with one hand and Fred’s hair with the other, wondering what sort of amazing, blind luck she had managed to acquire. “So, are your parents gonna be around for this party? Or is Ginny plannin’ on disappearin’ ‘em?”

If the twins seemed offput by talking about parties or their family while making out, they didn’t show it. Instead, they replied between kisses and itesin short turns, finishing each others’ sentences without any problem at all.


“Ginny’s made a plan --”

“--to hide the bodies.”

“Sending them on vacation.”

“Why, did you wanna meet ‘em?”

“Some other siblings would be around, likely.”

“Of course I wanna meet your family. I just said I really like y’all.” She blushed, feeling a bit sheepish after actually saying it out loud. Just hinting had been way easier.

They smiled, pausing in their kisses and nibbles and little touches in order to look at her properly. “You can meet ‘em all. The party’ll be a good start.” George looked oddly fond over the idea.

“Just as long as you don’t fall madly in love with any of them. We don’t share with them.” Fred was just, well, Fred.

Theo giggled and then sharply nipped Fred on the shoulder. “I don’t want them, I just want them to know I want y’all. That I’m ... serious in my intentions.” She wondered if she could sound more Southern. She’d even thrown a y’all in there.

They seriously loved that y’all. Had they mentioned that in the last three to five minutes? They loved it. Fred giggled at the bite, but then went on like it hadn’t happened at all. “Aww,” he said.

“Are you courting us?” George asked, clearly amused. So Southern.

She went beet red. “Maybe.” She just wanted to make sure that things were legitimate. “I just don’t want anyone sayin’ I’m just here for the sex, or ‘cause of y’all’s perfect bottoms. I mean, it helps, but I really do like y’all.” She worried about them when they were gone. She wanted to take care of them.

“Psssh,” Fred looked absolutely cheeky about all this, and he couldn’t help himself. Perfect bottoms? Really? He rose his eyebrows at George.

Who, of course, smiled back and silently mouthed something that seemed close to ‘cantaloupe halves’.

Oh, well. Fair enough. “Who cares what anyone else says, anyway,” George finished off, nipping at her side as if in punctuation.

“I care ‘bout what your family says, y’all are close.” She sighed contentedly, running her fingernails down George’s back. “And I can’t believe nobody’s told y’all about your bottoms. Seriously?” She raised an eyebrow. Who were they dating before? ... oh, right, nevermind.

It was hard to compliment someone who looked exactly the same without becoming a little too egotistical. Not that they didn’t do it sometimes, anyway. They giggled over it, too amused. George turned into the sort of back scratch, sighing happily.

“Our family’ll be nice. At least some of ‘em.” So long as they didn’t ask too many logistical questions, or something.

“Well, hopefully they won’t get too graphic.” She wrinkled her nose, resuming running her nails up and down George’s back since he seemed to like it so. Really, nibbling on George’s earlobe was its own sort of fun since he made this happy melty noise.

“We’re British,” Fred pointed out with a little laugh. “No one gets too graphic.”

“Mmm, no,” George agreed. “We all agree not to talk about anything beyond when we’re getting married.” God but those back scratches were nice, and so he made another one of those silly noises.

The happy noise made her giggle, and she stretched out her legs. “Take it from someone who’s been there. Sometimes bein’ married is a little overrated.” She did appreciate that their family was terribly English, it’d be a nice change from her own family.

"No worries, Mrs. Flowers," Fred said, giving a rather languid stretch himself, slouching down until he was nearly neck level in the water.

"We don't think marriage is in our cards at all." Gee, wonder why.

Fred glanced up at the ceiling, petulant. “Can we have more making out now?”

Who was she to deny him that? She ducked under the water, tugging on his feet to tug Fred into the water too, snogging him once he was all the way under.

Well, that was new and exciting! Underwater kissing was immediately something Fred considered something his new favorite, even if it was a bit hot. It was also the other kind of hot. After a moment, he pulled up a little, giggling and paying attention to the curves of her waist with happy fingers.

“Please don’t die,” George said, like some sort of voice of reason. Which was laughable.

Theo laughed giddily when she and Fred surfaced, grinning at George. “Promise. Don’t know if I really can, if my dreams are any indication. I should be near a hundredish!” She screwed up her face.

The twins burst out into laughs over that. “Really?” Asked George, moving closer to the two of them.

“Does that really make you a cougar, then?” Fred was sometimes awful. But he kissed at her neck and breasts to make up for it.

“In my dreams, I was born in the eighteen-hundreds. I was a medium on vaudeville.” She leaned against Fred’s torso, reaching out for George. “If I’m really that old, yes. Y’all can call me a cougar.”

They weren’t going to anyway, because they might have been a bit rude sometimes -- pranksters et al, but they weren’t really jerks. It’d be awful mean to call their girlfriend old.

George scooted forward enough until he was pressed up against Theo, chin on her shoulder. “Do you just live forever then?”

“I think I just know how to age more slowly. Dunno. I haven’t gotten to modern times in my dreams yet, it’s still the nineteen-thirties.” She blushed a little. “It’s nice, actually, kinda like watchin’ a movie with me in it.”

“We could make movies with you in them,” Fred said.

George gave him a look and then leaned over to fix his hair a bit. “So you just -- tell fortunes and stuff?”

She laughed at Fred, leaning over to kiss some of the water from his neck. “You just want to co-star.” George’s question made her nod, stretching her legs out in front of her. “Some, but mostly I talked with people’s dead relations. The weird thing is, dream me ain’t fakin’.”

There was something very comfortable about being able to talk a bit, make out a bit and then go back to talking when it came to Theo. It felt normal -- something that the twins had always done with each other, and she just fit into the equation comfortably. No rush -- they’d always be there. There’d always be time.

Fred tilted his head to steal a kiss, while George went on talking.

“Talk to the dead? What about, even?”

Their whole relationship was easy, which appealed to Theo. Mr. Flowers had never been easy; he’d been a type A personality all the way, the sort of person who freaked out when things weren’t ‘just so’. Being able to be messy, to be herself at all - Theo loved it.

“Whatever they wanted, really. It’s not like they stop seein’ us once they go. If anything, they’re more perceptive. Most people just wanted to talk to dead relations.”

“That’s kind of morbid.” The twins were still, in some ways, quite young. They were blessed with that strange belief yet that they were nearly invincible and immortal in some regards -- neither thought about death in ways that affected them because they’d never experienced it in a way that did.

“We should have gotten champagne for this tub. God, that would have been better, wouldn’t tit have? We’ve failed.” Fred was easily distracted.

Theo smiled to herself. “Someday, there’ll be someone you want to talk to more often. I’d give my eyeteeth if I could talk to my mama again.” Theo nuzzled into Fred, closing her eyes. “I brought some wine if y’all want it?” It was rare she went anywhere without a bottle.

Snuggling naked in a hot tub was probably not the best time or scenario for asking after peoples’ dead mothers, and so the Twins just didn’t for now. That would be terribly awkward. “Yes,” said George, nibbling at her shoulder.

“But only if we’re allowed to be hedonistic heathens and drink it straight from the bottle.” Fred petted his fingers through her hair, which was so much more red than theirs.

“Is there any other way to do it?” Theo smiled, purring and closing her eyes as Fred stroked her hair. She lingered that way for a moment before getting up and walking naked and dripping to her bag. “Brought strawberry this time, from last year. Gotta test it ‘fore I sell it.” She winked at them, grinning broadly before walking carefully back to the hot tub.

“Of course,” the two gingers said in unision, clearly more interested in watching their very naked girlfriend walk around in the nude than they were in the finer points of trial and error with wine.

She eased her way back in, blinking at their stares. “What? Did I get somethin’ on me?” She proceeded to uncork the bottle.

“Right,” Fred said, reaching up to help her step back into the tub because clearly they were gonna live in here for the entire weekend.

“Pretend you don’t know you’re the most gorgeous woman in the state.” George finished.

She just looked down, blushing and smiling. “Y’all are terrible. I’m nothin’ special.”

They just stared at her, expressions blankly amused. For a short beat, they said nothing at all, because really, sometimes silence and disbelief were the best compliments.

But then Fred ruined it by giggling. “Heh. Y’all.”

She laughed, blowing a raspberry on Fred’s shoulder. “It’s a useful word!”

“We love it,” they both said, sounding quite earnest, considering the details of the situation.

“I like y’all too,” she smiled, lifting her legs to her chest and giggling. Sometimes when the twins were like this, they made her feel like all of the debacles and sleepless nights with Mr. Flowers were lifted from her memory.

They only giggled at that again, sipping the strawberry wine straight from the bottle and then passing it on amongst themselves -- stealing little kisses and touches between drinks.

“So, verdict on the wine? Think it’s good enough to sell?” She took a swig of it herself, rolling it around in her mouth for a moment.

"It's really good," the said, marveling some. Theo really did make the best edible sorts of things, and while they weren't exactly poor at cooking, they were sure they'd never compare.

"Did you make a lot?" George asked, suddenly. "Can we buy some? For the party?" Supporting the girlfriend and getting people drunk all at once!

“I’ve got a few cases, yeah.” She bit her lower lip and grinned. “Y’all really like it that much? I don’t have to charge you, you know.” She wasn’t hurting or wanting for anything.

"We do like it. It's light and refreshing and other wine type compliments."

"We don't mind paying. Seems fair, you know. But boyfriend discounts are also appreciated." Fred set the bottle down and pulled Theo back into his lap.

“You’ll get it at cost, I’m not gonna charge y’all more’n that,” she laughed, loving that Fred picked her up like she was a doll. Reaching out for George, she pulled him close too, licking a bead of water from his chest.

She was just easy to move! The fact that she never really wriggled against it only made it easier. Deciding that their not real haggling was over with, Fred occupied himself by nibbling and kissing any portion of her skin that wasn’t in the water. George stole proper kisses because he felt like it was his turn.

It really was George’s turn. Theo sighed contentedly when he kissed her. George tasted a little sweeter than Fred, though she doubted they’d agree; maybe it was her own biochemistry that made them different to her. Different, but equal, and a matching set. She’d never separate them.