Canaan can't trust her senses (fortheliving) wrote in valarlogs, @ 2013-06-27 15:07:00 |
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Entry tags: | !complete, canaan, motoko kusanagi |
"It keeps your fine motor control up."
Who: Canaan, Motoko Kusanagi
What: Motoko comes by to see Canaan's digs.
When: Recently, after this net post.
Where: Canaan's place.
Ratings/Warnings: PG-13 for Cybernetic Bodies.
Status: Complete!
Motoko got out of her car, and made her way up towards Canaan’s apartment. She took the stairs instead of the elevator. It wasn’t like she could break a sweat, and she didn’t like being enclosed anyway if she could help it.
“3-23,” she murmured, and knocked on the door.
Canaan had been in the middle of some very delicate wire wrapping work when Motoko knocked. Not wanting to put the piece down, she rose her voice loud enough to be heard through the door, "Come in. It's unlocked."
“Okay.” Her voice hadn’t changed, at least. Motoko opened the door, stepping inside and closing it behind her. She was dressed casually, and looked around for Canaan as she walked in. She never had learned much about the woman.
Motoko didn't have far to look. Canaan's work bench was a few feet away from the door. Shelves above it were lined with various colorful boxes that held components, tools, and materials. One of them had gun cleaning supplies in it.
She was sitting at the bench, straddling the chair. A pair of pliers was in one hand, a delicate piece of wire and beads in the other. A candy cigarette dangled out of her lips, "Let me finish this. I got a little preoccupied while waiting for you to come."
“Never understood why you didn’t just smoke.” She walked over and leaned against the work bench, her jeans riding down a little and her shirt riding up.
The expanse of skin that was revealed when that happened finally made Canaan glance up from her work and take in the sight of Motoko. The woman definitely looked different. Paler, and more... purple. It wasn't a bad change.
"Siam didn't approve. Tobacco is the difference between life and death in a heavy firefight. Nice look."
"Thanks, and he's right, I just wanted to say something to see your reaction." Her eyes went down the front of Canaan's shirt.
Canaan snorted. With one last twist of the metal, she set the pliers down and held up the pendant. The spiral of silver spun in her hands, sparkling beads catching the light like a kaleidoscope.
With a nod, she got up, then grabbed a candy stick out of a nearby cup and offered it to Motoko with a smile, "I would have noticed you eventually. Especially when you started showing yourself off."
“I’ve been trying to keep a low profile since I closed my last case.” She popped one into her mouth and sucked on it a little. Mmm.. “At least until I can confirm my next assignment.”
"Is posting on the net part of keeping a low profile?" Canaan smirked at Motoko, then pressed the new pendant she'd just made into the woman's hand, "This should suit you, even with the new hair."
Motoko twirled her tongue around the candy as she looked down at the pendant, a little taken aback. “It’s beautiful. You didn’t need to make anything for me.”
"I wanted to."
Canaan smiled at Motoko and headed into her small kitchen, which was pretty much just a few steps away. She opened her fridge and pulled a few beer cans out, one of which she tossed to Motoko, "So you're between cases?"
"Mostly. A few things I'm keeping my eye on, but otherwise, a lot of free time." It was driving her nuts, especially with her date-life generally sucking. She had been, for some reason, having a hard time getting anywhere with anyone she'd been trying for.
That was a problem that Canaan couldn't even understand. She wasn't the kind of person to get involved with people in general - it was safer for them in most cases - but Motoko had been a special case and was one of the few people that could get a rise out of her.
"Maybe you need a hobby. I bet you'd pick up jeweling pretty quickly."
“Me, working on jewellry?” Motoko looked at her. “Not sure that’s in my interests. Maybe computers.” She rubbed the back of her neck.
"I didn't seem the type either." Canaan opened her beer and took a sip, then walked through the small studio apartment and retrieved a small piece of wire sculpture from her window. It looked like a woven eiffel tower, "I started here. It was a play on cat's cradle, but all I had was wire. It looked pretty, and then I started seeing wire and jewelry differently."
She held it out for Motoko to inspect, "It keeps your fine motor control up."
“I’m not doing a cat’s cradle. I haven’t done one of those in ten years.” She’d had more serious pursuits. And it seemed a little stereotypical.
Canaan gave her a look, "I was explaining how I started. You don't need to follow in my footsteps. Why are you so contrary tonight?"
Motoko sighed. “Sorry. Things have been tense since I came to this country. Haven’t had an easy time, professionally and personally.Not trying to take it out on you.”
"Well, you are. And you didn't even bring takeout," Canaan observed, with a bit of a smirk. She was concerned for her friend, of course, but some things went unsaid between them. That was just how they generally worked, the few times they'd crossed paths.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
“Oh. Shit. I’m sorry.” It was easy to forget food when you didn’t eat. She looked down at the pendant. She had to trust some people, sometimes, right?
“There have been some fundamental changes to my life.”
The other woman waved a hand, quickly dismissing the takeout issue, "You had other things to worry about."
She took a seat on her couch, casually pulling her legs up, and invited Motoko to take the seat next to her. It was more like a loveseat than a couch, but it was comfortable and draped in colorful saris and blankets, "Do they involve these changes you've gone through?"
She nodded her head, then came over and sat next to Canaan. She liked proximity to this woman, though she’d never admit it. “Do you have a laptop? I can show you some of them.”
"Of course."
Canaan motioned to the small desk next to the sofa, which had a very slick modern laptop on it. There were few other things decorating it, though it was stacked neatly with books.
"It's got all the bells and whistles. You've got me curious, now, I have to say."
She reached over and picked the laptop up, perching it on her lap. She reached under the back of her hair, and a moment later she was plugging a cable into the side of the laptop. The screen started to move and change, going between programs and files. She turned it towards Canaan.
This was nothing that Canaan had ever seen before, and she'd seen some pretty advanced technology in her various jobs. She tilted her head to the side a bit, watching her files and things open and close and tab around.
Her eyes followed the cord to the back of Motoko's neck, "You're really doing that, aren't you?"
“Yes. This body isn’t organic, neither is my brain. My soul is there. My thoughts and feelings and emotions.” She smiled ruefully. “It took some tweaking to regain precise motion controls. My apartment is full of origami cranes.”
"... How did you get your soul into a machine?" Canaan squinted at Motoko. The body she was in was so lifelike that she had a hard time believing that it wasn't 'real'. Some part, deep inside her, wasn't sure how to feel about this. Why would you choose to be less than human?
“With someone who knows how to do such things. But it’s a question in the place I dream about. What makes someone human.” She flexed her fingers. “Is it the body, or the mind?”
"I don't know. What makes a soul a real soul? How do you know you're really alive?" Canaan frowned, and decided to take a long sip off her beer. These were the kinds of discussions she'd have with Siam when she was younger, but they never went anywhere. There was no reliable source and nothing was fact, you could only go on what you felt.
"Was this your choice, or was it the only option?"
“I don’t know. I feel like I’m alive, I think. I have emotions. Is a soul really tied to the body, or does the body not matter?” She shook her head. “When human thought and feeling is just data, why should a body matter?” She took Canaan’s hand, so she could feel the warmth and texture of her body. “I was killed, during a confrontation. Burned horrifically. It was this, or dead forever.”
That didn't seem like a choice, to the other woman. It seemed like a survival situation. She couldn't judge. Or she could, but she shouldn't. It hadn't been her body or her life. Canaan nodded, her hand caressing at the 'skin' of Motoko's hand. It... felt like real skin.
"...I don't have the answers. It was your life and only you could have made that choice. If you'd never said anything... I never would have known the difference."
“At least until I lifted something too heavy,” Motoko pointed out, turning her hand over in Canaan’s. It felt nice. “I might have made that choice, even without being forced into it. It feels like I’m in my natural element now.”
"Why is that?" Canaan continued to caress her hand at the other woman, even putting her beer down so that she could do it with both hands.
It felt amazing. “Because what does the sum of human experience mean, if you’re not willing to explore it? I’m stronger, faster, and smarter. I can think faster, and more things at once. Hacking is almost orgasmic. I dream I was in these bodies from a young age, and sometimes the dreams feel more like real life.”
Canaan hadn't had any of these dreams. She'd been in Orange County for months now, and had no idea what anyone was talking about. It made her feel jealous in one way and glad in another. If the dreams moved people to do things like this to themselves... she wasn't sure she liked that. It felt like some kind of invasion.
"But you aren't exploring human experience anymore. You're exploring something greater and different than that. You've stretched beyond the limits of what a human can do."
“I’m exploring some things.” She smirked a little. Motoko wasn’t sure she could explain it. If there was a way to lose herself into the vast internet itself, she just might.
"...Are you?" Canaan asked, raising an eyebrow.
“Yes. At least when I’m able to.” Something in Motoko’s tone and in her body language made it clear that there might be more to her choice of words.
"Is there anything that new body of yours can't explore?" Canaan's question wasn't simply out of curiosity. She wanted Motoko to explore her, and had wanted that since the woman had shown up at her door.
The body thing had been a mild turn off at first, but now she was over it and if Motoko was still capable of getting intimate with someone, she wanted to give it a try.
“No, Canaan.” Motoko pulled the woman almost into her lap. “There’s nothing I’m not able to or willing to explore.”