Vanille Dia prayed for a miracle (a_new_dawn) wrote in valarlogs, @ 2013-06-25 16:11:00 |
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Entry tags: | !complete, oerba dia vanille, oerba yun fang |
"Everything just felt so hollow inside, and I..."
Who: Vanille, Fang
What: A semi-awkward lunch and reunion!
When: Recently!
Where: A cafe somewhere.
Ratings/Warnings: PG-13 for... girls checking out other girls I guess. I'm not even sure there's cursing in this log.
Status: Complete!
Fang got there early. She had had trouble sleeping, plagued by the strangest, most disturbing dreams. Pulse, and losing her parents all over again. Meeting Vanille again.
She didn’t know what it meant, but it had made her angry and sad and … angry again. She ordered herself something salty and tapped her fingers impatiently on the table. She didn’t know how this meeting would go, so she pushed the dreams from her mind.
The dreams were still a thing that Vanille rarely had to worry about. She hadn't had any of her own, yet, and had mostly been keeping track of what everyone else dreamed about. It was better not to worry about what she might dream about someday.
Plus, she had enough worries! Because Fang was here. Fang was here and she didn't know what to do about that. Did it mean anything? Did she want it to? She hugged herself as she headed into the restaurant.
Sitting up as the red-head entered, Fang found herself digging her fingers into the table. She was a little older, they both were, but it was unmistakably Vanille. Emotions buried for years welled up just below the surface, and she had to blink her eyes to clear them and force herself to not run at Vanille and hug her.
She looked so healthy, and good, and a little nervous but that was understandable. And she was so hot.
Fang bumped her cane, but caught it before it clattered to the ground.
There was no one else in the world that was going to look like Fang, even several years later. Vanille's eyes latched onto her nearly instantly after a quick scan of the room, and she stared. She stared, and stared, taking the sight of her in. The other woman had grown up so proud and strong and gorgeous.
Tears welled up in the corners of her eyes. It was really her. It was really her friend, "FANG!"
And then, her arms were out and she was running towards her friend, and anyone in her way decided it was wise to move out of it.
Fang stared at her, once she'd been spotted, unsure how she should react. She wanted to hug her and never let go, ever. Her eyes were drinking the other Australian in. She didn't feel proud or strong or gorgeous. She felt like she was sixteen again and trying to figure out how she was going to tell Vanille she liked women.
She pushed herself to her feet and then Vanille was in her arms and Fang didn't care if the whole world was watching. She hugged her tight.
If the whole world was watching, Vanille never would have noticed. Everything faded away as soon as the two of them impacted. Fang, it was Fang, and she was there and holding her and she smelled so good and was so warm.
Vanille squeezed Fang tightly and wept openly as she did so. She wasn't ashamed of it at all.
"You still use strawberry," Fang said, voicing an old complaint, but she was anything but unhappy with the idea. Vanille smelled wonderful. She kissed her hair and stroked at it.Part of her wanted to break down too, but she was the strong one. She just held her.
"'Course I do... strawberries are the best thing in the world..." Vanille said, between sniffles. The sweet and fruity smell reminded her of better times, too, times from before when Fang had been around. It was the only scent she had that reminded her of her friend, so she'd bought tons of strawberry scented shower products when she got to the states.
She squeezed Fang more, soaking in the physical reassurance of her presence. The other woman's ribs creaked a bit, but she didn't relent, "Oh I've missed you so..."
Fang let out a little, choked sound. Vanille was going to crush her ribs but she didn't really care - this was the most awesome hug in the history of hugs. She didn't want to let go - she wanted to get closer, but she had no idea how Vanille swung and it was too soon anyway.
And part of Fang wasn't ready to give up the bachelor lifestyle, anyway. Not yet. "I've ached for you."
"Everything just felt so hollow inside, and I..." Vanille squeezed tears out of her eyes, "Fang, you were gone and I felt like the world was going to open up and swallow me. I did. But I had t'keep going, I had to..."
“I thought you were dead. I raged and screamed and pleaded to see you an’ know for sure but they said it wasn’t good that there wasn’t...” They were making a scene. Fang started to edge them towards the table, but she didn’t let go. “I would have stayed, I would’ve never have left your side!”
"But I never would have wanted that!" Vanille declared, pulling away to frown at Fang. Her eyes were red and puffy from crying, and she smacked her fist against Fang's shoulder, "Not like that, no. I... You woulda wasted away waitin' for me, and what if I never woke up?"
She shook her head and looked down at the floor between them, "I was sleepin' for years an'years... I just... It woulda been nice to know where you went so I could follow you."
“I didn’t... if I’d known...” Fang frowned, looking down at Vanille’s breasts the ground between them. “I wouldn’t have just...left you. I woulda stayed in Perth, found somethin’ there to do. Probably what I’m doin’ now, but there.” She rubbed at the back of her head. “Probably found plenty o’people to pass the time with, I guess.” But she would have been there when Vanille woke up and she would have...confessed?
Maybe she shouldn’t confess.
It wouldn't have been a horrible confession, but Fang had no way of knowing the sort of friends with benefits relationship Vanille currently had going with Belle. The younger woman was hesitant to mention it, especially right then, "That woulda been nice... there wasn't anyone there when I did."
Her voice was tiny. She didn't want to talk about this anymore, "I don't wanna dwell on the past, I wanna talk about... the now, let's not think about it."
Closing her eyes, Fang exhaled slowly. It was painful to think that Vanilla had woken up alone. "I'm so sorry, Vanille...But you're right, lets talk about now!" She pulled away to sit. She even pulled out the chair from the table for Vanille.
Vanille stepped away slowly, then clapped her hands together excitedly, "I'm so happy to see you, though! And I'm starved, is this place any good? I've never eaten here before."
It was like night and day, the difference between her mood a second ago and now. She grabbed up a menu after she was settled in her chair and looked it over excitedly, "Ooo, grilled sandwiches."
"It's pretty good, I stop here sometimes after work, when it's late, so I don't really know how good the day staff is." Fang grinned, the expression lopsided, the gleam in her eyes fond. It was so refreshing, that Fang felt her heart grow warm. It was like something had been wrong with the world and it was now made right.
Everything was completely okay with the world now, "Well I think we probably scared 'em off with that ruckus we made a bit ago, but maybe if I smile at them enough they'll realise we don't bite!"
Vanille giggled a bit at her own joke, then tucked some stray red curls behind her ear. She almost couldn't sit still for the excitement she still had just to be in Fang's presence, "I'm gonna get this strawberry milkshake. It doesn't go with anything but I don't care."
"Speak for yourself, Vanille. Fang ain't just my name." She grinned at her own joke, then swiveled her head as a woman dressed in tight jean shorts walked past. She coughed, then looked at the menu. Or rather, at Vanille over the menu, in time to watch her tuck her hair behind her ear. Oh god. She was hooked by that.
She didn't even notice Ms. Legs walk past a second time.
Vanille did, though. Right out of the corner of her eye, enough to tilt her head off to the side just slightly and raise an eyebrow. It was a quick reaction that soon melted away as she put the menu down and focused on Fang, "So you bite, then? I don't think that's very nice."
Oh. Oh. Had Vanille just...? Fang could barely contain her excitement. "That depends. There are good ways to bite someone, an' good places." She flashed her teeth in a cocky smile and trailed a finger down her own throat.
That was quite a display. Vanille raised her eyebrows again for a second, then squinted at Fang, "Well yeah, but you wouldn't want t'bite those places in public, would you?"
“Depends, still. On where you are in public.” She grinned. “There was this one time in a park...”
"... In a park!? Really?" Vanille's mouth went temporarily slackjawed, just thinking about it. Even if it was just playful biting, that was still pretty bad! Or pretty good. Or maybe it was a little bit of an exciting adventure, but still, it was naughty!
She pointed at Fang, "You've grown up even more troublesome than you were!"
It wasn't really a complaint, though. Her tone was fond.
Fang threw her head back, laughing uproariously. The tone of Vanille’s voice and the amused look on her face were funny, and heartening. “Well, I could tell you things but your ears would fall off, and they’re too cute for that.”
"Oh but now I want to hear them, that's no fair..." Vanille trailed off and pouted a bit, "Even if my ears did fall off."
The waiter came over and she quickly placed her order. She was actually glad for the break in conversation, because she was pretty sure that her face was the color of a lobster.
It was the most adorable thing ever. She licked her lips, and then placed her own order, without tearing her eyes away from Vanille’s face. “I guess I really enjoy the company o’other women.”
"So do I! They're the best," Vanille agreed, clapping her hands together again. She wasn't as naive as she seemed, not entirely, and she knew that Fang meant more than just hanging out with a female friend. Even if her response didn't quite sound like it.
“They are,” Fang said, her tone interested. “What sorts of things do you like doing with women?” She had to ask, and she was interested in seeing Vanille’s reaction. She was adorable.
The first reaction she got was a blush that was deeper red than before and nearly rivaling the girl's hair. It spread up to her ears, and then down her neck to her chest. Then she ducked her head, "Oh, well... I really like... I like t'snuggle them. And I like when snuggles lead to other places, it's... real nice... and I like sittin' on their laps, and just... being with them."
Fang’s breathing grew a little shorter the redder Vanille got. It was easy to relax with her, but they were both adults now, and...well the woman was making her feel sixteen and horny again - but that wasn’t hard to do.
“That’s really sweet...”
"I do lots of cuddling with Belle," Vanille agreed, with a nod, "She thinks it's sweet, too!"
"Oh." Fang was saved by the arrival of their appetizer, and she popped one into her mouth to prevent herself from saying something stupid. What had she expected? Swallowing, she said, "Cuddlin's good..."
Vanille dug into the food, making assorted noises over how delicious it was. The disappointed tone in Fang's voice was obvious, and made her heart sink a bit. She wasn't sure what to do to make it better, "I don't think it's... a mutually exclusive cuddling relationship?"
That somehow didn't make it any better. In fact, it made it worse. Vanille deserved to be the center of someone's world. The sole being around which her lover orbited. At least when it came to sex and romance.
No relationship could survive that kind of obsession.
"Oh. I guess that ain't bad."
It just wasn't that kind of thing. Sometimes Vanille wanted it to be more than that kind of thing. Sometimes the fact that they didn't put a label on it was just the kind of thing her mind could grasp.
"It's really nice! I keep sayin' that, but that's 'cause it's true. I wouldn't even be here without her, she arranged for my visa and everything."
"Well I owe her some thanks." Fang wondered if that was the mysterious phone call, and she was unsure if she was happy about that or not. Anyone who was that protective of Vanille made her happy, but at the same time... It made her intensely jealous.
"Oh I do, too! I don't know if I'll ever be able t'repay her, you know?" Vanille didn't think that cuddles and the other things she offered were really enough. It troubled her sometimes, when she let herself think about it.
She decided not to think about it, and instead take a long sip off of her shake.
“I think if you’re just yourself that’s enough. It would be, for me, anyway.” She nudged Vanille’s foot with her own. “Everythin’s okay with you? Health wise?” She was allowed to worry, the last she knew, she was dead!
"It took me a while to fully get up t'snuff, but I think I'm okay now!" Vanille declared, smiling. It was nice to know that Fang cared enough still to ask those kinds of questions, though she didn't want to think about the rest of it too much.
"Sometimes I get a weird neck pain, but that hasn't happened in over a year, so I think whatever went wrong there got itself working right again. You?"
“Still keep my cane with me in case my leg spasms, but it’s been pretty good for a couple years now,” Fang replied, feeling a little stupid. It was just her leg, nothing compared to a coma!
"Oh no, you've got a cane?"
How had Vanille not noticed that? It was probably nearby and if it got any bigger it'd bite her. She looked around for it in fact, her brow puckering with worry, "That's not good at all."
She lifted up the cane to show Vanille. It was made of a smooth wood, with a dragon head on the end. “It’s okay. It’s useful for smackin’ people around.”
"Well it's kinda fancy too, with the dragon head on it and everythin'." Vanille nodded her head, then giggled over the idea of her smacking people with it.
Mainly because she could completely picture Fang doing it, and a mental picture of a younger Fang walking around smacking people with a cane was now running around her head. It was amusing, "Figures you'd have somethin' to smack people with even now!"
“What? It worked out when we were kids an’ someone was up in your face.” Only now she might stab them. Except that would land her in jail, so maybe not.
"I know, that's why it's so funny! I'm imagining you hopping up on the table now and threatenin' people like you're the war chief again or something..." Vanille replied, still giggling, "Only oh! Don't do that for real though, I don't want to get kicked out."
Fang had been halfway to her feet, too, when Vanille said something. She darted her eyes and sat back down. “Sorry...”
"Don't be sorry!" Vanille giggled, "It's just that I like bein' here with you and it'd be a shame if we got sent away before our food was done, y'know?"
Their main course picked right then to arrive, and Vanille picked up a french fry, then pointed at Fang with it, "You'd be hungry and sad, and you know you would. Then you'd get mopey and cranky."
“Well, I’m really hungry, so that’s a good idea!” And Fang dug in! She wouldn’t want to be mopey and cranky. Her best friend was sitting in front of her!
That was the best part about it, as far as Vanille was concerned. Her best friend was back and in her life again, and nothing at all could be wrong with the world as long as that was true.