Enjolras isn't a statue, really (solo_patria) wrote in valarlogs, @ 2013-06-11 17:30:00 |
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Current mood: | better |
“What a way to meet in person isn’t it?”
Who: Azelma, Enjolras, Eponine
When:June 5th, Aka Barricade Day one
Where: Chez Thenardier, or at least their part of Haruka and Michiru's place
What: Caught up in his memories, the 1832 version of Enjolras has been noticeably struggling and tries to do something about it. A breaking point, a resolution, and Thenardier sister friendships
Notes/Warning: Drug use, Depression, Discussion of Death, High Risk Pregnancies. This is intense but worth it.
Azelma had been meaning to get rid of them for the longest time. And what better way than to ‘help’ a friend by giving them to him cheap. Sure it wasn’t the best of ideas for forgetting or dealing with issues, but it had more than helped her in the past. She wrapped the pills inside an envelope, then rubber bands before going to wait out back where her sister wouldn’t see.
As for Enjolras, he had left the cafe for just a moment hoping it would be there when he returned, that today was not going to turn into the chaos the barricades themselves had been. He knew enough to know that drugs were quite illegal here and he could face quite a bit of trouble, not to mention, death if this went wrong, but presumably Azelma had had more and been all right.
So he would simply...buy the pills and hope that they helped him. He did not want to remember anything tonight. Did that make him a coward? Yes. Did that mean Patria would disdain him for sinking so low? Again, he decided yes, but then, she had already not been much for coming to him here. So, he went ahead, walking the distance from the cafe to Eponine’s place, taking a few deep breaths while doing so. He was damning himself, and knew it but...
How else was he to face these things?
If Éponine had been even remotely aware of what her sister was up to, she would’ve forbidden it. And probably used some very inventive phrases to describe how stupid an idea it was, even if drugs like that could have their uses in dulling pain or helping people forget.
Who was to say they’d even affect their dreams? They weren’t exactly usual.
She was stood under the tree closest to the house so she wouldn’t hear, having made sure the tv was on and all so as to trick her sister into thinking she was watching it. When she noticed him come up with the box and the drink , she pushed herself from the wall and held at her lower back.
“Nice to see the face behind the blog, finally.’
“And the same.” Enjolras offered her one of his half smiles. He would have tried for more, perhaps, if he was better equipped to deal with this century and this world right now, but he was not able to snap himself from the mindset of the past just now. Still, part of the smile was there, for a friend. “What a way to meet in person isn’t it?”
It wasn’t like the TV could really fool Éponine. Gavroche had pulled the same trick more than once, so... a simple investigation, less than a minute, proved that her sister had somehow managed to slip out of the house. Which, really, was a feat and a half - true, she was a Thénardier, but she wasn’t the most subtle sometimes...
Intent on finding out just what was going on, she slipped outside, trying to listen out for something, anything that’d give her some kind of idea...
“I guess it could have been better, yeah. Been meaning to get rid of these anyway. Nearly forgot I had them. Last thing I need is for my sister to find out I had them in the first place. And It’s not like she counts how much money goes through my hand.” She took the donuts and drink and held out the little envelope of pills. “You take only one, it last about four hours. Wait an hour, take another. Or else you’ll trip so hard you’ll try and drink from the toilet like a dog.”
That was an image wasn’t it? Enjolras snickered at that and passed over a bill before grabbing the envelope. “That IS good to know. I hardly want to ‘trip’ exactly. Just to...well. Forget.” He had watched them die, all of them before his eyes, well, ears in one case and...if anything made him feel better in that grief being comfortably euphoric might do the trick.
“Thank you.” He said, and meant that. “This is...I hardly want it to become me but I...”
What he was about to say, he couldn’t even remember now.
Whilst Éponine wasn’t able to make out most of what was said, if any of it, it certainly seemed suspicious enough from where she was, just out of sight around the corner. Part of her, at this very moment in time, was all too tempted to go into full-on overprotective sister mode...
But was that the right answer? If that exchange was as suspicious as it looked... oh, dammit, she couldn’t keep hidden, couldn’t keep herself from intervening. “Azelma Thénardier. Mind explaining what’s going on?”
SHIT. Azelma jerked her hand back with the $20 and stepped away. “N-nothing! What are you doing out here. You were busy with finals stuff.” Is trying to keep the obvious sign she was lying down as little as possible. Her sister was scary when protective. “It’s really nothing. Enj here just thought to bring me some snacks because I’ve been having cravings. Yeah. Cravings.”
“We’ve blogged together.” Enjolras explained, and wondered why this felt so much like being caught by one of his early school teachers reading a biography of Saint Just, instead of working on his Latin. Eponine was certainly more agreeable than any of them had been. Perhaps this was one of those things when you were in some kind of trouble that just happened.
“Hello, Eponine.” He nodded at her. “It IS good to see you. Are you all right?” Considering what this day WAS.
It was hard to find the motivation to do ‘finals stuff’ on days like this day. Éponine had barely been able to keep her mind even remotely on-track, which meant she was spending more time being concerned about her siblings than studying - she blamed what Courf had told her for that.
“As good as I can be, considering.” That wasn’t something she was going to tell Azelma. She hadn’t told Gavroche, after all, and there was no reason for her to break that trend... “Considering how much we have in the house, I’m struggling to believe that excuse...”
“Enj was just going.” Pushed close to him and tried to get him to hurry along. In doing so she bumped his hand and dropped the envelope. And fate must hate her because it just rolled in front of Éponine. Just fucking great.
“Yes I DO need to get back to Courfeyrac.” Enjolras explained. “Things were relatively quiet when I left. He does not do well with that so..” he bent for the envelope quickly, hoping this would be something that worked out. “Thank you for the....coupons.” he added, nodding to the envelope. Right. That was going to work.
Sweet Jesus, these two were completely and utterly terrible. Éponine didn’t even know where to begin. She bent down and picked up the envelope, arching an eyebrow at that rather lame excuse. “I’m pretty sure this and coupons have next to nothing to do with each other.”
“Uh.. No. They are! For uh...A pharmacy in town!” She never was good at lying to her sister, so she’s already shaking at the hands and breathing too heavily.
“No doze.” Enjolras explained “And five hour energy.” Both he, and the person from this world who he shared the body with were fond of it after all. It was a decent explanation given how ridiculous the cost of those things for the size were. He ought to have been appalled but they had kept him awake enough that he could work and not dream, so...you grew used to the small annoyances not quite worth fighting. ...Like the way that you grew used to this life’s Courfeyrac.
“Long term.” he added, as if that helped anything.
Right. This was getting ridiculous, and Éponine, frankly, wasn’t going to put up with it. “Apollon Enjolras. If you don’t tell me the truth, I’m breaking into your place and stealing your flag."
What WAS the truth here? The truth was Enjolras was a hypocrite and knew it, after what he’d put Grantaire through in the past. It was even worse in fact considering what his choice was. “I am a hypocrite and failure.” Was what he answered, steadfastly, not bothering to drop his head because he hardly deserved the luxury. “One who needed to forget, and so...” He nodded toward the envelope. “They do not, however, have a thing to do with Ro...with Azelma.”
That’d worked out a lot better than Éponine had expected. She’d have to keep that particular threat in mind, just in case a situation like this happened again. Never mind that she really didn’t have anywhere where she could keep said flag. “Enjolras, there are better ways to forget than to do things like this... it’s a temporary relief, maybe, but it might come back ten times worse.”
While they were talking she slowly started to try and walk away. It did have something to do with her because she was the one who had been using them before Valerie was conceived. That and some other harder things on occasion - thankfully never becoming an addict.
“And I can think of none.” Enjolras told her, sighing. “I hardly want to become...Grantaire in the dreams. There is one example straight away. It is hardly as if I have done this before. Laudanum when I broke my arm in Paris but...” He frowned. “I would not forget forever but today, tomorrow. This is the first year of remembering and...I have no love for what it’s doing to me.”
Enjolras would get his answer, whatever Éponine could come up with, when she wasn’t busy being concerned about her sister. She gently took hold of her sister’s hand, tugging her a little closer. “Hey. Stay with us... I know you promised, but I know that it can’t have been easy on your own...”
They were together now. With les Amis, they even made a kind of family... true, not in the strictest sense, but who cared about things like that anymore?
“I’m sorry... I shouldn’t have... And I meant to get rid of them and I thought it would help with like a one time thing and I didn’t want you to find out or be disappointed in me and... and...” And she’s slowly losing breath and spiraling down into a bad place. She can’t help it. “I’m sorry Enj. I shouldn’t have offered. I should have thrown them out. Please don’t be mad at him its my fault.”
Enjolras had no idea what to do here. Not really. Oh sure he’d had his share of watching Jehan try to talk Courf out of a panic, and had gotten him to breathe those late nights on skype when he got texted with that message but...it wasn’t like he could do anything wrong there that would make Courf lose a baby or anything. It was a bit different, and.... He decided he would try the approach anyway, as much as his own heart was racing.
“Breathe.” He told her, reaching out to grab her hand. “Whenever I squeeze breathe in or out with me.” He kept his voice pitched calm, but there was a note of command in there too, more like someone with an authority granted by the trust of others, and not just put there by other means. He hoped he had her trust as much as he had les amis’.
“This is not your fault”, he added , squeezing and taking in a breath, and so on. “I should not have taken you up on...I suppose you ARE right that we ought to get rid of them. It will not do for anyone to have them or find them. I was overwhelmed but...That still is not a reason. Cosette mentioned as much, online. It was my choice though. Not yours.”
Seeing this may well’ve removed any doubts that Éponine might’ve had about choosing Enjolras to be the baby’s godfather. Whilst it was all too easy to panic at times like this, he’d somehow managed to keep a level head... and from what she knew, what he was doing was very likely to help. “I’m not mad at either of you. Wouldn’t us anywhere, right?”
For any other man, her brother aside for obvious reasons, she would have triggered even more. But she’d known Enj as Demo for the longest time, spoken to him over messages and comments on each other’s blogs posts. At his ‘command’ she listened and closed her eyes to focus on the breathing, focusing on nothing else but that. Azelma swallowed hard and reached down to hold the lower part of her stomach. “I’m sorry... I’m trying to calm down.”
After about a minute or so of just the breathing she looked to Enj and smiled. “Thank you...” She’s not letting go of his hand any time soon, though.
There was a huge part of Enjolras right there that wished that he could go back to when doing things like this, instead of being left with a past that he could not quite deal with, had been the norm. Not that he had stopped any activities of the past but...his focus had been so different. With Azelma right now, and like this? He was remembering to some degree what things had used to be. And he missed them. There was another moment like this, where he tried not to let out a few tears of frustration at the way things had gone, and then he was returning the smile for Azelma.
“You’re welcome. And it really IS okay. I...you didn’t do anything worse than I just have, if that helps any? I’m sorry I started this. The memories I’ve been having...” He shook his head. “I think they’re making me nuts after all. Or sick, like they made Grantaire. That isn’t something you could, or should have to, help.”
Azelma smile a little more. “I guess so. Hey. Want to feel something? Before I drag you in and make you play Uno with Éponine and I while we eat these donuts and order a pizza because not letting you out of my sight now that I think about it!” Smiled and took the hand that was holding his and pushed rather firmly to just on the underside by her hip so he can feel. “See!”
“Courf might have a problem with that part.” Enjolras told her, and laughed, actually. He hadn’t really done this kind of thing since...it’d been...around Christmas anyway. Maybe a little bit after when they’d gotten on the network. “I did kind of promise him I’d come back to his thing but for now? I’d like that. A lot.” What was weird was that he barely remembered a lot of the last couple months but that didn’t matter at the moment, while he did reach out to feel. “She’s moving then?” he asked.
“Yeah!” Smiled and wiped her eyes of any tears from the panic had brought. “Come on! We have donuts and we can get pizza and all sorts of stuff.” Took his and Éponine’s hands and pretty much dragged them both into the dining room. She went out to go find the Uno cards, and change into pj’s!
Éponine always tended to forget just how strong her little sister could be. That she could drag them both... well, it probably meant something. She’d think on what exactly later. “...That has to be one of the fastest changes in mood I’ve seen for a while.”
“I have no idea what’s going on.” Enjolras admitted, as he let himself be dragged in, and gave Eponine an apologetic sort of shrug. “I mean I know I owe a lot of people an apology for the last...several months, and especially you right now but I kind of need to...” he nodded at the envelope he was still holding onto. “Where’s the bathroom?”
“Second door on the right,” Éponine gestured down the nearest hallway. This place was stupidly huge, it had to be said, even with practically all of the Thénardier family lurking around... “Apologies can come later. First, I think we have to lose terribly at Uno.”
“That’s worrying.” Enjolras flashed Eponine probably the first genuine grin she’d ever gotten from him and slipped away to dump the tablets, watching as they swirled around and down the drain, and then back to the card game. Well, first he was tugging out his phone and texting Courf a quick note that he’d be back later. He had a lot of things to make up for, to a lot of people, but starting here would be a good first step.
Azelma returned after a short while longer in owl pyjamas with hearts, the Uno card deck, and her laptop so she could put music on at a low volume. “Okay!” She smiled and set everything out before grabbing the phone to call for pizza and it being a guy on the line she tensed and shoved the phone at Éponine then turned to grab plates and a bag of Cheetos. The plates for the donuts. She sat down and tried to actually shift the baby inside her by way of pushing and poking at her stomach to get a comfortable position. “Get. off. my. spine. you. little. thing!”
An actual grin from Enjolras? That had been a surprise... Éponine was, naturally, more than willing to make that order for her sister, not wanting to force her into any uncomfortable situations. Really, it was a good thing that at least one of them was okay with men...
“I don’t think she can help being on your spine, Az.” And if she could, Éponine doubted she’d want to. Thénardier babies could be notoriously evil.
Enjolras snickered at that part. “I COULD text Joly. Ask him if babies are supposed to be on spines? See how badly he freaks out.” What was that? He hadn’t actually felt like this kind of thing was funny in...months. “If nothing else, it might be entertaining,” He added, slouching against the back of a nearby sofa.
“Why would he freak ou- Oh oh! You can tell him you’re going to be the Daddy! Leave out the whole ‘God’ part of it! Huh?! Huh!?” Giggled and made an expression Éponine would not have seen for a while! She squinched her nose up, bit her bottom lip while she beamed and shut her eyes tight. This was also paired with a gigglesnort. Her shoulders may have raised up just a little bit.
That was certainly something Éponine hadn’t seen for the longest time! She couldn’t help but smile, shaking her head. “I think we’re all determined to give Joly a heart-attack... and for the record? I approve. Massively.”
Terrible, Éponine? Of course not!
“Oh my GOD.” Enjolras started laughing too, like he’d laughed with Joly and Courfeyrac back at New Years, before things had gone completely crazy. “That is incredible.” he told Azelma, smirking. “And it goes with my...oh christ, my post. “ He frowned a little, shaking his head. “Well. That was a mature way to go about it. I couldn’t have tried Craigslist anyway? But yeah, maybe I WILL.”
It’d probably be awesome, after all.
Azelma giggled like a little idiot and dealt out the cards. “And. And! I have ultrasound pictures! You can send him. And send a picture of my baby bump to his phone!” Evil? The Thénardier way!
Dear God, Éponine was so proud of her sister’s evil right now. It was more than just the Thénardier way! If they didn’t traumatise at least one person a week, they were clearly doing something wrong... “This is going to be beautiful. How long are you going to keep it up?”
“This is sort of amazing.” Enjolras smirked. “Better because I don’t do this kind of thing at ALL. If it was Courf, he’d probably catch on sooner.” Of course, he’d also probably assume Courf had done that kind of thing before Enjolras but... It wasn’t like he’d definitively said he hadn’t slept with women in the post today. And it’d been January when they’d talked about his other...issues so...
You know. He could have had enough time for this right now, thinking about it that way.
Smirking at both of them, feeling lighter than he had in, like, forever, Enjolras pulled out his phone.
“I’ll go get the ultrasound pictures and you can send and actual up to date picture of my baby bump!” Scurried off to her room and giggled as she went in search of the pictures!
“We should take bets on... something. Like if Musichetta or Cosette going to slap you for this.” It wasn’t like there were very many women that associated with les Amis, right? They were the obvious choices... “Or if someone faints. That’s always a good one.”
When Azelma returned she was carrying the little box Éponine had gotten for her for all the ultrasound photos, doctor’s notes, baby book. She took the ultrasound ones out and handed him the copy. “Here you go!”
“They’re going to think the anniversary's really driven me insane now.” Enjolras smirked and whipped out his phone to start asking gestational questions. “Let’s see. I’d better use writer speak for this. Like he ever shut that off these days. Okay, it was easier to let...Other Enjolras? Older Enjolras? Whichever, handle the writing because damn, the man was good. But, even so.
“Should I hit up Bahorel too? Ask him for advice and then send him the picture with an exclamation point? He tries to go into team dad mode enough.”
“I think you should. Just to see if he comes up with any interesting ‘oh, god, Enjolras, you didn’t do that!’ ideas.” Sure, Éponine liked Bahorel and all, but it was fun to freak him out!
Azelma giggled and made sure of their evil before starting the Uno game. The rest of the evening is pretty much her kicking their ass at the game and just having a great time!