Literally Pirateninja (shadowcat) wrote in valarlogs, @ 2013-06-06 13:40:00 |
|
|||
Entry tags: | !complete, kitty pryde (shadowcat), obi-wan kenobi |
You’d think I’d be used to this kind of thing.
Who: Kitty and Obi-wan
What: comfort and Advice
When: 6/4
Where: Kitty's place
Status: complete
Rating PG-13
Triggers: Discussion of torture
As usual, Obi-Wan had a great many things he felt he needed to do and a limited amount of time to accomplish all of them. And, as usual, he felt guilty once he realized, at least by his perception, that he was failing to be everywhere he needed to be. This time, it had been Kitty who had fallen a bit by the wayside, which wasn’t typical for their relationship. Perhaps it was only that since their shared storybook adventure dream, good things seemed to be looming on the horizon for her. Or so he’d assumed. Now, he had doubts, because Obi-Wan had begun to feel a strong sense that all was not well with Kitty Pryde, and so he stopped by her house unannounced one night after working on the De Chagny Theater.
It might have helped that Faiza had dropped more than one hint that he should check in on his friend.
Kitty hadn’t been sleeping. She’d put on her brave face for the kids, but Alicia hadn’t been coming around, and she still didn’t know how to talk to her about what happened. She knew the red-head didn’t even remember it, which wasn’t entirely fair, but it was what it was.
Part of her wished Faiza hadn’t put her ear back. That way she could have a physical scar to prove that it had all happened. She felt guilty.
Obi-Wan walked to the door and knocked. The sun had set and it was around the time that stars would have appeared, if the city lights weren’t so close and so bright. Now that he was in close proximity, he could sense the stress, confusion, and sadness that lay on the other side of the door. Before Kitty had a chance to answer, he had knocked a second time, out of concern.
It took that second knock for her to answer. She looked frazzled, and there were thick hollows under her eyes. She blinked at him, and immediately clamped down on her distress. Too late, but she made the effort at least.
“Hey.”
Obi-Wan lingered in the doorway, his brows slightly drawn before the lines around his eye softened. It was in his nature to ask straight out about what had happened, but it was also in his nature to be gentle with a suffering friend. He tilted his head. “Is this a bad time?”
“It’s always a bad time. Come in.” She stepped aside to let him in. She wondered if it might be a good idea to move away, but she figured trouble would follow her and she didn’t want to be alone.
His eyebrows knit again. That was not the response of the Kitty he knew. Obi-Wan followed her inside and closed the door behind him. Something terrible had happened. He could sense the vibrations of fear and anger that filled the house. They made his skin turn cold. “What’s wrong?” he asked, more direct, but his voice still gentle. “What’s happened?”
She rubbed at her arm, unsure how to tell him what had happened. Or if there was any way to really express her confusion and guilt and self-blame.
“Last week...do you remember all those weird posts on the net? From people who weren’t...exactly themselves?”
Like most men his age, Obi-Wan occasionally lost track of the Internet from time to time. He was, however, aware of what Kitty spoke of. He nodded, walking to the sofa and taking a seat, hoping Kitty would follow. He wanted to make her comfortable, if he could at all.
“They were possessed by the dead,” She took a seat as well, and spoke as though she were talking about a brunch she had last Tuesday. “Some of them were pretty nasty people. Possessing very good people. I was...well I’m dating this woman, and she was possessed.”
“What?” The word came from Obi-Wan’s lips very suddenly, but how could he have predicted Kitty would have said anything like that. He cleared his throat. “Oh God. What happened?”
“What. That’s a good reaction? Want a drink? Like water or something.” Kitty moved to get up, then gave up on the idea and rubbed her face. “Whatever...thing...was inside her, used her body to do some pretty terrible things to me and a friend.”
“Something a bit stronger, if you have it,” he said. Truly, he hadn’t been drinking much at all, out of respect to Faiza, even though she never would have requested it of him. Right now seemed to call for a drink, however. “When you say terrible things, what do you mean?”
Kitty didn’t say anything until they both had a glass of strong liquor. She settled back down and weighed her words. As she usually did, she was blunt. “We were tortured, and it used some kind of spell to make us share in each others’ pain.” She still had phantom pains in her fingers and ear.
Obi-Wan brushed his hands across his mouth, his face stern and lined with grief. “Who else...? Is it someone I would know?” Illyana or Clarice, perhaps.
“I don’t know if you know her, but I don’t think she’d want it well known. No one I lived with, but someone I’ve dreamed about.” Kitty rubbed at her earlobe, like a nervous twitch.
He nodded and waved his hand. He didn’t need to know; he just hoped it wasn’t someone he was well-acquainted with.
Obi-Wan did, however, pick up on some dark energy that pulsated at Kitty touched her ear. How odd. And oddly important. He took a drink and thought for a moment. “You know, Faiza has been hinting for days that I should stop by. She knows about this, doesn’t she? Of course, she couldn’t say anything.” He paused. “She helped you afterward, didn’t she?”
Kitty bit her lip, hard, and sucked on it for a moment, then she nodded her head. “Yeah, she patched me up. My friend, too. A couple of other girls who’d been tortured by someone in another friend’s body. It was a bad weekend.”
Obi-Wan rubbed his forehead. He’d always known his love was a good woman, but he was beginning to suspect she was a great one. The scene sketched in his head was a gruesome one. He set his glass, now drained, on the coffee table. “May I ask how bad it was?”
“You may, and maybe I’ll tell you.” She held up a finger in order to stall him while she downed her entire drink, then she put the glass down. “She dug into her fingers, and her thumb, ripped out her nails. She cut my ear off. She cut off her tongue.”
Thank heaven Faiza was able to put everyone back together again! Obi-Wan was sick to his stomach. How terrifying it all must have been. "How did it stop? You said she was possessed."
“Nate saved us. I guess he picked up our distress. He’s... close to my friend. Not sexy close, but close.” Kitty filled her drink again, and looked down at it morosely. “...they had to ..basically kill Alicia and bring her back to get her free.”
“Nate? Really.” His eyes widened a bit more. The boy was special, no doubt about it. But what Kitty said next caused Obi-Wan to wince. “Oh my...” he sighed, shaking his head. To witness that, to experience it first hand--how devastating, life-changing!--and he himself could relate all too well.
He placed a hand on Kitty’s shoulder. “Don’t think of it like that. Think of it as whatever it was the possessed her had to be set free, and Alicia survived.” His fingers moved to gently graze her ear. Faiza, as always, had done a perfect job.
“She survived, but she doesn’t remember much. I’ve barely even spoken to her since. I can’t bring myself to.” She played with the rim of her drink. “It isn’t fair, and I know it isn’t fair. And she needs time to adjust to that kind of...violation. I’m intimately aware of how it feels to have someone use your body.”
Obi-Wan frowned, looking inward for a moment, aware of his desire to protect people by keeping secrets; and, more to the point, knowing how frequently he hurt his friends in the process. And yet he did it again and again. “I know I may sound like a hypocrite, but you could do more harm to her, and your relationship, by not telling her. If I was in her position, I’d want to know that my friends could forgive me, even if what happened wasn’t truly my fault.”
“I’m scared, Obi. That I can’t forgive her. Which is stupid, I know. I’ve forgiven a lot worse, but that was always watching..something else get hurt like that, and not me. It makes me a selfish bitch.” She closed her eyes. She supposed she’d have to make the first move eventually. “I’m worried she won’t forgive herself, either.”
He nodded. He knew full well how fragile relationships could be. “It doesn’t make you selfish. She wasn’t the one who did it, but it was her face you’ll always have attached to the memories.” Obi-wan paused. His face was gentle. “Are you in love with her?”
Kitty blinked. She hadn’t expected the question. “Y...yes? I’m really bad at..casual relationships. Emotions always get mixed up even when I’m trying not to let them. I worry that it’s just...not real emotions. Fake, rebound oh god I need comfort emotions...This really isn’t helping.”
Like a father, Obi-Wan just wanted to hold Kitty then. She felt everything so deeply. He did, too; he was just better trained at burying it. “No no, it’s okay. Time. You need time. Your mind is spinning like a top. I can sense it.”
“I still need to call her, at least, she deserves that much.” She wasn’t sure what they’d talk about but she had to try. It wasn’t much of a relationship if they didn’t try.
“She doesn’t remember anything?” he asked, combing his beard.
“A little bit. Like she remembers how it felt to be..violated. And I suppose she remembers warning me. Nothing after that.”
He nodded somberly. So Alicia had attempted to warn Kitty. Obi-Wan found that quite interesting. “Hm. Is there anything I could do to help now? I’m so sorry I wasn’t aware of what was happening. I’ve been...”
He wondered if he’d been too focused on himself, buying a ring and planning his proposal, and planning on moving into Faiza’s house. And there was the terrible business with Alma. There didn’t seem to be enough hours in the day to do all the things he needed to do and be in all the places he needed to be. Jedi or not, he was only one man. “Just tell me if I can be of any help to you now.”
“You have a life, Obi, and I wasn’t trying to draw any more attention to things than I had to.” She gave him a smile. “You’re helping now. A lot. Just being here right now. I really needed someone to talk to who wasn’t as close to the situation.”
It had been so long since he’d tried to have a life that he still second guessed himself at every turn, but Obi-Wan nodded and told himself to accept Kitty’s words. He rubbed his hand along his arm, thinking about the ring he’d brought along with him, but feeling he ought to put off showing it for now--though the box was in his pocket and the lump was rather obvious.
He poured both of them a little more to drink. “Thank you, but I do wish I could have helped sooner. I get so buried in my work.”
“I wouldn’t have been very reachable for the first couple of days... I needed some time to recoup.” She smoothed out her shirt. “You’d think I’d be used to this kind of thing.”
It wasn’t a light comment, considering everything, but the corners of Obi-Wan’s lips turned upward anyway. He lifted his glass and, leaning back against, the sofa, rested it on his chest. He sighed. “If you were used to it, that would be the time to truly worry.”
“I think I am used to it, but it still affects me. Which is better than it not affecting me any more.” She reached over to fill her glass again, and chewed on her lip. “Or I’m just used to bad things happening.”
Obi-Wan thought about how young Kitty had seemed a year ago, when they’d met. And how their relationship had grown. Like a father, he wished he could give her everything her heart desired; but also like a father, he knew she needed even more than that.
He placed his glass back on the table and extended his arm to her.
Kitty looked at him, then slid over and curled into Obi-wan’s arms. She squeezed her eyes shut and buried her face into the Jedi’s chest. She breathed deep.
He didn’t say anything as he smoothed his palm down Kitty’s hair, sighing deeply himself, and hoping that everything would come together in her favor. And if it didn’t, he’d still be around, even if he was, as always, a step behind.