InsaneJournal

Is it weird that I’m jealous of a toaster now?
Who: Billy Horrible and Tinkerbell
What: Coffee date, then Iron Man 3 viewing
When: May 2/3
Where: Coffee house, movie theater
Rating/Warnings: None/Low
Status: Complete


Tink was wearing her amazing Iron Man shirt over a long-sleeved thermal shirt and a pair of jeans. It was warm enough that, even though it was 10pm, she didn’t need a jacket with her outfit. Okay, so it might not be a sexy, come-and-get-me kind of thing, but she didn’t feel the need to show off curves for Billy. He was just a good friend, right? A good friend who made her feel gooshy in her tummy sometimes.

At 10pm she was waiting by the front door for him to come and pick her up.

To be fair, most human socialization and interaction made Billy’s insides feel gooshy. Probably not in the same respect as what Tink was on about -- but he made a pretty special case for her, too. Like, the kind of case where once in a while he wondered if it was okay to kidnap people and then take over the world for them. And then give them Australia as an apology for all that kidnapping stuff.

Or, you know, maybe it was just a crush.

Either way, he pulled up by her place at 10pm on the dot, and actually thought it was a good idea to get out of his car to meet her up by her doorstep. “Hey!” He greeted, overly enthusiastic and twitchy. Like always, really.

It’s okay. Tink thought the twitches gave him character. Whatever that meant. She was starting to think that his quirks... you know, the eye twitch, the mentioning condoms in text messages, the gif wars... she was starting to think all of that was absolutely adorable and not just nerdy. Well, okay, it was nerdy, too, but it was adorable on top of being nerdy.

Long story short (too late) she was starting to develop more than friend-ly feelings toward Billy. Sorta. Kinda. A little bit. Tonight would probably push her in one direction or the other, hopefully.

She brightened as he came out of his car, and gave a little wave, then headed over to meet him half-way up the walk. “Like my shirt??” She asked, looking incredibly excited as the little, blue circle of LEDs glowed on her shirt.

“Oh yeah, flippin’ sweet.” Billy said, and wondered how often women prompted men to just stare at their chests. Not that he was doing that. That would be weird. And totally ungentleman like. But he did have to look a little, right? Or else he wouldn’t be able to look at the t-shirt. “Do you think they’ll make you turn it off in the theatre? Does it turn off?”

He gestured a little toward his car, unlocked the passengers side door and opened it for her.

Tink had boobs. Not all girls had them, she found. Some girls were just too skinny, and didn’t have boobs and hips. She wasn’t pudgy, or even overweight, really, but she was bigger than a lot of girls. Just because of the boobs and the hips. If she’d known that the shirt was accentuating her breasts, she might have second thought it. But no, the shirt was way too awesome. She would have worn it anyway.

“Yes, I can shut it off.” She said, then lifted her hand up inside the shirt and turned it off as she followed him to the car and climbed in. A gentle “thank you” escaped her as she slipped into her chair.

Oh, god. She had to like... stick her hand in her shirt to turn it off. That wasn’t awkward and weird at all. Billy only gave a weird noise in response before walking over to his side of the car. No need to start it up or anything since he’d kept it running with the flashers on.

“So? Coffee? Any place you like to go?” It was definitely going to be a decaf kind of night.

Well, yeah. The switch was on the inside. Anyway, she was wearing a shirt underneath! Welp, whatevs. She had no idea that it made him feel awkward and weird. She simply got comfortable in his car, leaning back a bit in the chair.

“Ummm... somewhere close to the theater? I’m definitely gonna need some extra caffeine to stay bright and attentive during the movie.” She gave him a smile. “Lots of chocolate and sugar.”

Staying up for an action movie wouldn’t be hard. Staying up in general wasn’t hard for Billy -- he was a night owl. This was like the middle of his day instead of the night. Over caffeinating just made him a bit sick, though, particularly when he was already a smidge nervous.

But chocolate was never a bad thing. Speaking of! “Oh yeah!” He said, pulling off toward the great beyond. Or a coffee shop near the theatre. Whichever. “Check the glove compartment, huh?” Inside she may or may not (okay, definitely she would) find an oversized package of tan m&ms. Sure, they didn’t come in the normal packages anymore, but that didn’t mean you couldn’t order them special online. And she had said they were her favorite, right? That wasn’t paying too much attention to a friend in a creepy manner, was it?
It was always so hard to tell where that line was.

“Hmm?” Tink gave him a confused look, then reached forward and opened the glove compartment, and OHMYGOD M&MS. Her favorite kind. She may or may not (okay, she definitely did) have let out a little squeal. Just a little one. “Aah! My favorite! You remembered! Thank you thank you thank you!!” She remembered that conversation they’d had, too. With a swift motion, she grabbed the bag and hugged it to her chest. “Movie candy snack? CHECK.”

“No problem! Now we’ll only need to worry about Icees,” Billy said, with a grin that was bright and directed at the road instead of her. They’d been sitting in his apartment for a few weeks now, just waiting for a movie with Tink. It was kind of sappy, he was really going to have to watch himself before this shit out out of hand.

“Oh,” he said, a forced smile in his voice. “There’s a coffee shop!” he pulled in to park.

“Oooh, Icees!” Yes, they’d talked about Icees, too. And played video games at the--”We have to get to the theater early enough to play games!” She added suddenly, climbing out of the car once they were parked. She left the beloved candy on the front seat so she wouldn’t be tempted to tear into it while waiting for her coffee.

There wasn’t a wait, so Tink moved straight up to the register and ordered her drink. A small, iced, blended thing with caramel and chocolate and whipped cream. More milkshake than coffee, though she had them add extra shots of espresso.

Billy ordered a decaf coffee (taking Alice’s advice from ever ago) that would add enough excitement to his life from the sugar he’d put in it alone.

Once their drinks were up, they scooted into a little booth near the door. “Yeah for sure,” he agreed, “I’m up for maybe winning at air hockey this time.”

Tink grinned, the little straw sticking to her bottom lip as she leaned across the table at him. “Oh, I’m sure if you put your mind to it, there’s nothing you can’t do.” It was a Tink attempt at flirtation. Not a good one, but she was giving him a fun smile.

Yeah, he had absolutely no idea she was flirting there -- it was pretty vague, honestly. He only smiled, his left eye giving it’s signature, nearly nervous twitch. “Well, uh, thanks,” he said, even though he was a bit of a realist and just sort of disagreed.

She sipped for a moment. Long moment. Thinking. And then the cold started to burn in her nose. “Ahhh,” she said, wincing and scrunching her face up. “...brain freeze.” She lifted her hand to pinch at her nose.

“Errgh,” said Billy in something close to sympathy before sliding his hot coffee over to her. “Even it out! It works! It’s science!” And he’d know. You can just call him Dr...Billy. Thanks.

“So long as you’re not scared of the germs.” But that wasn’t about to stop Tink from sipping his hot coffee. It was pretty hot in a mouth that had just been all frozen. Maybe even burning-tongue hot. But she wasn’t going to let that get her down.

Actually, that took her mind off the brain freeze! “Thanks,” she said, giving him a smile as she pushed his cup back to him.

“Oh, you know.” said Billy, who wasn’t all that worried about Tink type germs. Not like he’d been worried about teenagers who wanted to lick you in grocery store germs. “That’s what I’m here for.”

The smile was warm. It, along with the hot coffee, helped to melt the brain freeze. Tink sipped again from her cold drink. “So! Are you excited? IRON MAN THREE.”

Take it easy there, Tink. Brain freeze sucks. “I could HEAR your capital letters,” Billy said and gave a genuine laugh, as opposed to his normally kind of spoken one. “I am excited! Obviously.”

Why be careful when she had Billy’s hot coffee to save her? “I could, too!” Tink laughed with him. “I mean... yes. Have you read any reviews, or anything? I’ve been staying away from too many trailers and stuff. Don’t want to spoil it!”

“Nah, I avoid review sites until after I see stuff.” Billy was big on media, and it was pretty obvious, but he was even better at making his own opinions. He sipped his decaf and rose his eyebrows a little lamely. Billy? He wasn’t the best at small talk.

“Me, too!” It was okay that Billy wasn’t great at small talk. Tink could small talk enough for both of them. “I mean, I hate it when the critics all say something’s great, then I see it and it turns out to be awful. Or vice versa. So I didn’t want to have any expectations going into this one.” She sipped again. It wasn’t quite to brain freeze status. But it was close.

Nodding in agreement, Billy scratched the back of his neck at the same time. “Anyway, reviews are so biased -- I could love something everyone else hates or be really upset when the hype for something great is too exaggerated...”

“Absolutely.” Tink agreed, also nodding. She took another sip, taking care not to let the ice cold milkeshake-y beverage touch the roof of her mouth. That caused more of the brain freeze. Or, that was the theory. “Should we get to the theater early for that air hockey game? Or um... we could find something to fiddle around with on our phones. Words With Friends, or something. If there’s a line already forming?”

“Yeah,” Billy said, looking at his wrist which clearly had no watch on it. “Scope out the place. Form a plan of action. Take over--er. Figure things out.” He finished off his coffee in one too-large gulp and burned everything in and around his mouth. That was okay. The icee would be better later for it.

“That sounds great.” Tink said. She hadn’t quite caught on that his word choice might have been a little strange. She climbed out of her chair to turn with him and head out of the coffee shop. “You know, I hope that the chemistry between Gweneth Paltrow and Robert Downey Jr. is better in this one than the last two. Three, I guess, if you count Avengers.”

“Right?” Billy wasn’t going to disagree with that. “I have better chemistry with my toaster.” Then again, it was really just a very nice toaster. It deserved his chemistry.

Tink laughed. “Is it weird that I’m jealous of a toaster now?” She asked, only mostly teasing. Partly. Kinda. Her cheeks went pink.

Billy blinked, and then went a little pink himself. Luckily, it was kinda dark outside, and he was turned toward his car to unlock the doors. “I’d give up some of my toaster time for you.” Which really made it sound like he did weird things with his toaster, now that he considered it.

“Well, I don’t want to drag you away from anything important, you know.” Tink said. Her cheeks were burning now as she climbed into his car. “I know how needy toasters can get.”

Somehow, Billy managed to get to the driver’s side and worry about his seatbelt and starting the car. “Oh. Well. You know. Once in a while you’ve gotta... make toast.” So. Lame.

There was a beat of silence after that. Tink nodded, first trying to figure out if that was really what he’d just said, then trying to figure out how she was going to respond. Finally she said, “Yes. Toast.” Then she cleared her throat. “SO. Iron Man!”

He coughed a little too, his pink fading away just a little. “Right. Iron Man. It’s gonna be awesome. The coolest thing since sliced bread.” At least he kept it consistent.