What Free Imaginations Lead To "Well, that's different..."
Michael wore a most perplexed frown at the prospect of having to handle the newest item in their inventory. "It's not quite..." He began, scratching one hand behind head. "What I had in mind, you know?"
No wonder the female staff had been a little flustered around the laboratory. Described as a 'portable lightning generator', he supposed that the idea of casing it in rubber was a necessity, but when the contraption ended up looking less like a rifle and more like a... That was when even the most professional of marksmen would start to have regrets about the thing's... Handling.
Mouth parted to say something, then closed and the hand from before slid around to chin in silent contemplation. How in the devil was one meant to even conceal it, let alone act formidable in the face of danger? It was a damned affront to one's dignity, was what it was! To that end, he gestured over the designer; a man who seemed forever on the verge of a squinty-eyed breakthrough in mathematics, yet always managed to wear the most crumpled attire aboard, no matter how newly washed it was.
"When you, uh... Came up with this..." A clearing of throat, before speeding up with an, "Additiontoourarmoury, um - what possessed you to... Come up with the final... Specifications?"
"Ah, well, you see! Funny you should ask that! I was ferreting about the house and came across this rather unusual-looking umbrella! And I thought-"
"Yes, yes, but... The, um..."
"Yes...?"
"The triggering mechanism is a little... Johnson, you're not on opium, are you?"
"Good Lord, no, Mister West! I'd never touch the stuff! Why, if the wife caught me having so much as a-"
Holding up a finger for a moment of silence, Michael took one last look at the device, glanced back at the engineer and decided that this was probably something best left to diplomacy.
"When you see Inquisitor Fry, be sure to solicit her opinion on the, um, the device. I think it might benefit greatly from her expertise in social etiquette."
"Social etiquette, Sir? Excuse me for asking, but whyever should that come into the equation? We're here to vanquish the ghoulies, sir! The things which go bump in the night! The ever-present danger from the world of beyond!"
"Yes, I realise all that, but... There are certain things which a lady might be better off not carrying around with her. If you get my drift?"
"Ohhh, I understand, Sir! Of course! The weight of the thing! As soon as we've carried out preliminary tests, I'll be sure to rush her a smaller edition of the device! It might vibrate a bit, mind, but it'll be quite useful in a pinch, I should imagine!"
Michael could only nod in amused silence. There were particular matters which a woman was simply better placed to protest. Hopefully, involving a facial slap and plenty of 'how-dare-you's. He only hoped he would be there when the inevitable cry of astonishment was made at the young man's presentation. As for Michael, it was clearly time for a drink...