"Him, then. My apologies," Teja corrected himself -- all his instruments had been ladies save one very business-only piano, so he only assumed. He looked over the broken bass, shook it to see how waterlogged the body might have gotten from the unforeseen dip in the loch, before pulling out his phone and texting the Gibson assembly boys they still kept on hand. "This'll take them about an hour to get the parts, bring them, and refurbish your old buddy. I know how important heirloom guitars are; I've got a couple, myself." He gingerly set the bass back up on the bar, and went back to work.
"2012 AD, but we've got an extensive After Dethklok history accounted for back at the 'haus. Technically, I was born around ADK 31 from my father's timeline, though he jumped ship technically around ADK 20, left that reality and married a lady in a different world. I was officially born in 1977. You can say that reality travel's been a sort of Wartooth tradition." He grabbed the unused glass and spun it in his hand.
He continued, "I grew up in this reality - or at least one near identical to it - since I was about two, and I've been doing the job of Dethklok welcome wagon since I was fifteen, or somewhere around there. In my time in this reality, I've seen six Offdensens, four Skwisgaars, two Tokis, one of your father, three Pickles, and three Nathans - though there's one Nathan that's come and gone at least three times. In the time they've come and gone through here, there's also been four second-gen Skwigelves, five second-gen Warteeth, and one bastard McKellen. We haven't had any Murderfaces or Explosions of our generation until you came around. Uh... And I had a couple nephews who lived here until recently, and another niece, but with the exception of yourself and myself, all that's left in legacy babies, is my first niece, C.V."
Teja paused to take a few orders, fill them, and return to what he was saying. "Oh, and due to the world being absolutely clownshit insane, sometimes we get the gentlemen in as ladies. Their genetics match exactly, save for that one little chromosome. However, I've yet to meet any one of our generation who is the child of any of the ladies of Dethklok. Got any questions so far, Kemosabe?"