InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Bow wow chicka wow wow!"

Pinkie Pie (ilovemuffins) wrote in utr_logs,
@ 2011-11-28 22:05:00

Entry tags:

deadpool, pinkie pie

WHO: Deadpool and Pinkie Pie
WHEN: Tonight!
WHERE: Paris, France to start, but I ain't predicting where it'll end up.
WARNINGS: Unlikely unless you consider complete ignorance of the 4th wall and being random as shit warning type offenses.

Pinkie would have bet you that you could never eat that many muffins in one sitting. But boy, did she turn out to be wrong. Derpy had kicked them out of the bakery after they had finished the sixth tray, and honestly it probably would be for the best.

Still though, there was at least one more tray in there...

She turned and grinned at her new best friend ever. "Well, it'll take her awhile to make more muffins! What do you think we should do now?"

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screwthe4thwall
2011-11-29 06:23 am UTC (link)

Deadpool might've been on the verge of a muffin-induced coma by the time Derpy kicked them out. He'd been happy, and Al hadn't been there to tell him to watch what he ate or she'd spike his food with nasty things again.

And he'd been with someone who understood the importance of Kool-Aid stains being avoided. That never happened.

The merc with a mouth managed a heroic shrug. "Try and hit people from the top of that tower?" 'That tower', of course, being the Eiffel Tower. Hey, he was a merc, not a person who knew things!

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ilovemuffins
2011-11-29 06:25 am UTC (link)

Pinkie blinked, looking up at the really tall pointy place that people kept insisting she had to go see. Really, why did everyone seem to want to go really high? It wasn't like calling a race or anything fun.

"Hit them with what? We ate all the muffins. Besides, then they'd get mad and probably not buy them anymore. I've gotta make a profit, after all." She thought for a second, then her entire face lit up.

"I HAVE AN IDEA!"

Grabbing his hand, she made for the nearest portkey.

(Reply to this)

	screwthe4thwall 2011-11-29 06:44 am UTC (link)
	"Coulda just asked!" Being dragged places by a crazy pink-haired girl he'd only just met? Strange as it'd seem to anyone else, he could really go along with this... and not just because she understood him, of course! He'd have to find out if she loved Golden Girls... And the goddess that was Bea Arthur. Naturally. (Reply to this)

	ilovemuffins 2011-11-29 01:01 pm UTC (link)
	"No time! Time is wasting, time is of the essence AND time is money!" Pinkie skidded to a stop once they were done traveling, and pointed up at four giant stone faces. "I don't know who they are, but they definitely won't be buying muffins." (Reply to this)

screwthe4thwall
2011-11-29 05:39 pm UTC (link)

Ah, Mount Rushmore, America encapsulated in the face of... four old dead guys. He'd never understood it and he wasn't about to start. Especially when he realised that standing at the right angle meant you could see right up their noses.

"Boring, colourless old guys never buy muffins," they sucked like that. They didn't even buy Girl Scout cookies! Cardinal sin numero uno! "We should make 'em colourful!"

He totally didn't bring paintballing gear with him all the time for this very purpose, no sir. It was just a handy coincidence that sometimes happened to involve defacing national landmarks.

(Reply to this)

	ilovemuffins 2011-11-29 07:30 pm UTC (link)
	Pinkie's eyes lit up in a way that usually was only reserved for tasty baked goods. "75 points if you can get it up the nose of the guy with the beard!!" She grabbed a gun, thinking of how to compose a song about this brand new sport. (Reply to this)

screwthe4thwall
2011-11-29 07:51 pm UTC (link)

She'd stolen his idea! Oh, he'd ended up in a good place here - sure, Pinkie was no Siryn, but she was so much more fun. She'd never let him paintball national landmarks for fun!

Picking up his own gun, aiming in the right direction and covering his eyes, just to make things a little more fair, he let off a barrage of paint. Good ol' Teddy'd probably never looked so colourful before, and honest Abe definitely did look better with a splash of colour on his cheek.

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	ilovemuffins 2011-11-29 10:47 pm UTC (link)
	Pinkie closed one eye, stuck her tongue out the side of her mouth and took aim. It took a lot of skill to hit a giant stone nostril with a paintball gun. Luckily she had practice. "Wahooooo!" she squealed in glee as the Presidents each took a glut of bright pink paint to the nose. (Reply to this)

screwthe4thwall
2011-11-30 05:32 am UTC (link)

Deadpool grinned when he saw that. This girl had style, a bakery full of treats he could raid when he wanted, and she could aim? Was Bea Arthur blessing him from the beyond? He had been a good little merc this year...

And it wasn't even Christmas yet. "See, that's lookin' better already!" Actually, aiming this time, he focused... and shot Washington right up the nose. That shouldn't have been so fun.

(Reply to this)

	ilovemuffins 2011-11-30 05:35 am UTC (link)
	Pinkie had no idea that you could find things that shot color at stuff, and frankly, her life was vastly improved by it. She was grinning manically from ear to ear until the horrible happened. "... it's out of stuff!" She frowned, sitting down on a rock. "I mean, this was fun, but it's not fun if it's out!" (Reply to this)

screwthe4thwall
2011-11-30 06:12 am UTC (link)

And the merc with a mouth's heart of gold shone through. Kinda. That's how he'd explain to anyone who asked just why he handed over his own gun, which was still mostly not-out, and pulled out another from that oh-so-magical endless bag of his.

Mary Poppins, eat your heart out.

"Wanna go shoot at actual people?" it was an innocent enough question by Deadpool standards. "There's this place where I know people could benefit from a shot to the butt."

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ilovemuffins
2011-11-30 06:17 am UTC (link)

Pinkie's eyes got so wide that there was every possibility there was something was wrong with her thyroid. She gave him a huge, quick hug then leveled the gun over one shoulder with ease.

Too much ease, really.

"It would only sting a little, right? Not really hurt them?" Pinkie may be a little random, but she wasn't out to really cause injury to innocent people.

Parasprites and Zombies on the other hand...

(Reply to this)

	screwthe4thwall 2011-11-30 06:26 am UTC (link)
	Hey, hugging without stabbing or other attempted murderousness, that was new! "Shouldn't hurt 'em, these guys have enough padding," Deadpool, making snide comments about Hollywood stars? Say it wasn't so! "Just get ready to run if they're lookin' stabby." (Reply to this)

	ilovemuffins 2011-11-30 06:27 am UTC (link)
	Pinkie grinned, hurrying again to the portkey. "They'd have to catch me first! I love a good prank!" If they were all padded it probably meant they were used to these sorts of things anyway. (Reply to this)

screwthe4thwall
2011-11-30 06:39 am UTC (link)

Oh, he loved a broad who went along with his crazy so easily. With a grin, he took her hand and touched the portkey, it throwing them into pretty much the middle of Hollywood... or, at least, a place where they could see the sign. Geography had never been Deadpool's strong point at school.

Hell, Napping 101 was his only true strength.

"Hollywood! All movies and glamour and... ladies with no clothes on sometimes," not that he'd have experience in that, no ma'am. He was a good little Deadpool. "Fifty points if you make them jump five feet or more."

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	ilovemuffins 2011-11-30 06:45 am UTC (link)
	Pinkie grinned, crouching down in a nearby bush and silently regarded a really tall, scruffy looking guy with a skinny lady and a whole bunch of kids. "Bet I can get 'em all before they get away!" she whispered, sticking her tongue out at him for good measure before firing. She did manage to tag all eight before the screams died off. (Reply to this)

screwthe4thwall
2011-11-30 06:54 am UTC (link)

...Did she really just tag Brangelina and their annoying brood? Pinkie was clearly a woman after Deadpool's own heart. He'd been longing to do that for years.

"Be still my manly heart!" he murmured in awe, before shaking his head and picking out his own celebrity target. He decided on a kinda crazy looking guy, who looked pretty tiny compared to his wife. He'd take mercy on the kid, just this once. "This is for Oprah's couch!"

For good measure, he tagged them both twice, and he was pretty sure he'd never heard a man scream be that high-pitched. Damn, he was good.

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ilovemuffins
2011-11-30 06:57 am UTC (link)

Pinkie blinked, tilting her head slightly.

"Was that a man or a lady? It totally sounded like a lady, AND he's wearing high heels."

Well, they looked high anyway.

Taking aim at a bunch of mean men with cameras crowding around a nice looking older lady with white hair, Pinkie managed to chase the rabble away from the woman. She didn't know who "Betty" was, but she'd be free to have a nice dinner now instead of a lousy time with some jerks asking her to smile big.

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screwthe4thwall
2011-11-30 07:04 am UTC (link)

Deadpool shrugged. "You tell me. Been tryin' to work that out since MI2." I mean, one of them probably had the stuff, considering the kid, but... he was going to stop thinking on that right there.

When she did that, his jaw dropped. She saved Betty White? The Betty White, the woman so awesome and badass that he kept a poster of her on his wall right next to his Bea Arthur shrine? "You're seriously my best friend forever now."

Or maybe more, if he played his cards right! He couldn't be cursed with the womenfolk forever, right?

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	ilovemuffins 2011-11-30 07:06 am UTC (link)
	Pinkie beamed. "Wasn't nice of them to crowd her! Look at her, she's totally hungry!" She paused, tilting her head again. "Actually, so am I! Let's go eat food!" (Reply to this)

screwthe4thwall
2011-11-30 07:17 am UTC (link)

Well, they had to stop paintballing celebrities for fun at some point, and they had done their good deed for the day and saved Betty White (hallowed be her name), so... Deadpool could go along with that.

"Just pick any one of these fancy places and go for it," he'd figure out ways of dealing with whatever happened. It was the only other talent he'd picked up during school, and a more useful one than just napping. "Don't think we're allowed to paint the waiters, though."

(Reply to this)

	ilovemuffins 2011-11-30 07:19 am UTC (link)
	Pinkie closed her eyes, then followed her nose the the one that smelled the yummiest. It was spicy and sweet and delicious all at the same time. "Gosh, that'd be silly. Then your soup would taste like paint, and who'd want a thing like that? Might as well just go and eat a rainbow!" (Reply to this)

	screwthe4thwall 2011-11-30 07:26 am UTC (link)
	...Eat a rainbow? Deadpool got the feeling she wasn't talking about eating an entire bag of Skittles (which he had done, once upon a time, and Al had never let him live it down). "See, this is why I need someone with me," maybe not sidekick, but... mini-Pool? He'd have to think on the name. Pinkiepool, maybe, that sounded good. "Must be why I keep getting kicked outta places." (Reply to this)

ilovemuffins
2011-11-30 12:59 pm UTC (link)

"They keep making you eat the paint? That's not nice of them! Don't worry, I won't let anyone do that tonight."

They were seated relatively quickly, but Pinkie bounced from one foot to the other until they were. She wasn't the greatest at waiting. She didn't know what Thai food was, but it smelled really good and she was starving, so it didn't matter!

"And I really won't let anyone kick us out! That'd be silly, how could they get our money then?"

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screwthe4thwall
2011-11-30 02:42 pm UTC (link)

Well, there had been that one time with Weasel and the bet he could heal it out, but... that was besides the point. It totally hadn't been worth the temporary poisoning.

"They'd find a way. Once knew this guy who could make money vanish from your wallet like that," a point he emphasised with a snap of his fingers. Of course, once Deadpool'd found out about the thievery, he put an end to it in the only way he knew how - by breaking his jaw for fun, and stealing his nifty pocket-picking device to torment Al with.

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