InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Destiel is canon"

Tobias Beecher [Oz] (otherofoz) wrote in utr_logs,
@ 2008-02-26 15:50:00

Entry tags:

chris keller, tobias beecher

Who: Beecher and Keller
What: There's no telling
When: The 10 minutes after he said he'd be there, here.
Warnings: Swearing, Violence. A good R. Past that, I'll let you know.

It actually only took Tobias nine minutes, at a good run, to get back to the house he apparently owned, from the port-key; it was amazing, what a combination of fear and anger could push him to do. Still, showing up at the door winded and quickly losing the adrenaline high from the excursion probably wasn't the safest was to start this.

Then he remembered, this was Chris. He wasn't exactly safe around the man to begin with. Huffing a sigh, he shoved the door open, slowly and carefully stepping inside.

"Chris?" He just wanted a warning, some sign of where the man was, before they got into it. That was really all he could ask for.

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willkillfortoby
2008-02-26 09:23 pm UTC (link)

There was the sound of a curse, a heavy bottle dropping and rolling across the floor and a shuffle before Chris' voice sounded from the kitchen, "Beecher?" The man was still drunk, swaying between several rections to all of this. He had been so gay the night before and obviously Toby couldn't handle it, didn't want it, so he ran off (In Chris' version of things) and got high. So, Chris got drunk. He got drunk and was still drunk. He hated Toby for leaving him, he hated himself for being so weak and he hated the world for bringing him back to life to be rejected by some fucker like Beecher. He hated the man, he loved the man, he wasn't sure-Chris was torn, drunk and at that moment, laughing.

"Beecher, you finally showed up," He stood from his chair, swaying like mad as he tried to balance himself, one hand going into the air as counter weight, the hand having a dirty bandage on it, "Good for you. Good for me." It was hard to gage Chris when he wasn't drunk. It would be an even harder feat now.

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otherofoz
2008-02-26 09:47 pm UTC (link)

Toby watched the man warily, eyes going from the empty bottle, to the sway in his posture, to the bandaged hand, and suddenly, he had an easy in. He stepped forward slowly, but this time with purpose, reaching for Chris' bandaged hand.

"What happened to your hand?" He gave the rest of the man a quick glance; nothing else seemed damaged too bad, so he couldn't have been in a fight. Toby tried to meet Chris' eyes, wanting to see if he could get the connection, if Chris would still let him that close.

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willkillfortoby
2008-02-26 09:52 pm UTC (link)

"Whoa," Chris pulled his hand away, lookng at Toby with a grin and a warning glance, though he wouldn't meet the man's eyes, avoiding them, but not in an angry way, more like a child who was caught doing something wrong and was ashamed, "Nothing happened to it. I happened to it, Beeche," Chris raised his eyebrows and tilted his head as he steadied himself and looked at the bottle on the floor, "You still high? I'm still drunk."

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otherofoz
2008-02-26 09:56 pm UTC (link)

"What did you do?" The concern was careful, not wanting to sound scolding, sure that would just make the man shut down. It wasn't like he had room to talk. He finally just let the hand go, deciding to take Chris at his word- even if he knew this was the last time he should really be doing that.

At the question, he followed Chris' glance to the bottle, before letting it stay on the floor. "Not really. It was just a little dope, anyway,"

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willkillfortoby
2008-02-26 10:00 pm UTC (link)

"I fucked up," Chris laughed and tilted his chin up, staring at Toby's face, "Fucked up," When Chris was drunk, he had worse mood swings than a person could sensibly deal with and from sentence to sentence it was hard to tell if he was angry with Beecher or himself, "Burnt myself," He held up his hand, grinning widely, "Tried to burn it off. Hurt like fuck Beeche, but you know how it is." He stepped a bit closer to the man, almost threatening in his stance as he looked at his hand.

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otherofoz
2008-02-26 10:04 pm UTC (link)

Lucky for the both of them, Toby wasn't exactly sensible. His concern for Chris trumped his fear, and he stood his ground even as Keller approached, looking ready to strike. He'd been serious; he'd take the beating, so long as Chris wasn't doing it to himself, as he seemed to have already done.

Still, being ready to take it wasn't quite the same as inviting the violence, so he decided against speaking, not wanting to set Chris off any sooner than he was already going to snap.

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willkillfortoby
2008-02-26 10:12 pm UTC (link)

"You know, Toby," Chris muttered, huffing out a laugh, "You know, I love you. But that isn't right," He started shaking his head slowly, "You know because you ran, Beecher. You ran, and you got high," His voice sounded so matter of fact as he smiled a bit, "I fucking disgust you, and you-" His unbandaged hand raised up to poke Tobias in the chest, "You don't even have the balls to say it. How do you think that makes me feel, Beecher?" His eyes were getting darker as his brow furrowed-He wasn't far from that snapping point Tobias knew was coming.

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otherofoz
2008-02-26 10:20 pm UTC (link)

The contact felt like fire against his skin; or perhaps hat was just the tension between them, sparking dangerously. He kept his eyes on Chris' face, watching the reaction, preparing himself for what his words were going to bring. Still, he had to say it, to clear the air, plant the seed of understanding in Chris' mind, to keep him from getting too deep in his rage. "You don't disgust me. I love you, you would never disgust me, baby, please... I was wrong, I love you, I won't do it again. Chris, please," He would keep talking, carefully shifting on his feet, until he got a reaction out of Chris.

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willkillfortoby
2008-02-26 10:28 pm UTC (link)

Chris bowed his head as the man spoke, taking deep breaths, his good hand fisting and relaxing at his side as the man spoke, "No," He said firmly at the end of it, head raising and finally he made that eye contact and it was all there-his hatred, his anger, his shame, his hurt, all of it-as he stared at the man, "No, Toby. I. Don't. Care." And there it was. Chris' breaking point.

Not even taking a moment to prepare himself for action, not giving it away, he punched at Tobias, the same hand grabbing for his shirt after it made contact, as there was no way he could do much with his burnt one, "Don't lie to me, Beecher, I don't want you to fucking lie to me. I just wanted you to love me," He yanked the man close to him, glaring at him, "And you fucking lie to me."

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	otherofoz 2008-02-26 10:33 pm UTC (link)
	And there was the hit he had been expecting- it took him a second to regroup, only managing to catch 'lie to me.' out of Chris' words. He shook his head, chin tucking against a shoulder to brace himself for the next punch. "I'm not lying. I love you. I do, Chris, please baby, listen. I messed up, I-" (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

willkillfortoby
2008-02-26 10:41 pm UTC (link)

It was nice to hear the man call him 'Baby'. Chris had a moment of thinking that before shoving him away and yanking him back with his arm, shaking him, "You're fucking right you messed up, we messed up, Beecher, me and you. Me and fucking you, together, huh?" He pushed forward to slam Tobias into the kitchen wall, his body pressing against the man's, his voice getting low, "You remember when I told you about my murders, Beecher? You remember? You thinking...You thinking that 'Chris has killed for fucking less'? Because I know I'm fucking thinking that. And you know what, Toby?" The exchange of the man's first and last name was just getting blurred in Chris' mind, whichever one that seemed to fit in the moment getting put in, "You know why I can't fix this like I fixed them? Because I fucking love you, and I can't fix that. I could kill you, baby, but then what? Then fucking what? I'd still be the shit that I am," He paused, hand fisting in the man's shirt as he pulled him forward to then shove him back, hitting him against the wall, "I'd have to die too, baby. I'd have to die again. Every time I've died, Beecher, it's been for you. For you."

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otherofoz
2008-02-26 10:56 pm UTC (link)

Grunting as his still-injured ass hit the wall, Tobias did finally start shaking, as Chris threw him around, getting so close, becoming menacing. The talk of the murders only made his worry worse, but he couldn't stop the word at the end of Chris' speech. "You're not some shit, Chris. I love you, that doesn't make you a shit, baby. There's nothing to fix. I love you. Please, just... calm down, baby. Shh," He tried to get Chris to take a breath, seeing if he couldn't deflate the man at least some.

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willkillfortoby
2008-02-26 11:05 pm UTC (link)

Chris took a beat before huffing and yelling out, "You ran out on me!" Shoving against the man hard, eyebrows drawn together as he snarled, "You rand out on me. I fucking trusted you, Toby, I trusted you and you ran. You ran," It was obvious Chris was having the most problems with that, with believing Toby running off and what they did not having a connection, "And you want me to calm down?"