InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "i love you"

Bruce Wayne (darkcrusader) wrote in utr_logs,
@ 2009-02-08 21:12:00

Entry tags:

bruce wayne, carrie kelley

Who: Bruce Wayne and Carrie Kelley
What: Serious conversation and stuff
Warnings ~~I wish~~ Nope!

Bruce had considered his invitation carefully. Part of him had wanted to go to her and comfort her where she was, but there were other things to consider. With so much change, there was comfort in normality, and there was little in their lives that was more normal than a cup of Alfred's tea.

Waiting for her arrival had been a source of some anxiety. He was well-aware of everyone's discomfort. They had reason to be unhappy with him. He was handling all of these relationships with extreme caution. He was especially careful with Carrie; he knew how hot her temper ran. The worry that she wouldn't come tugged at the back of his mind. Regardless, he sat motionless as he waited, watching the steam rise from the pot of tea.

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girlwonder
2009-02-08 09:29 pm UTC (link)

It was strange coming home. It wasn't as though Carrie hadn't visited before. Even after Bruce had turned old and different, Carrie had visited, if just to see Alfred or check in on the younger version of Dick. But there was something different in this trip to the manor. And Carrie, full of anxiety and something like hope, was struck by her surroundings as she walked down the long and empty hallways. Maybe it had to do with the fact that she'd been thirteen again not so long ago. The world had been much bigger and simpler when she'd been a kid and that sort of world view had given Carrie a little bit of insight.

As she walked down a hall, Carrie flicked her wrist and let her fingertips brush against the wallpaper. She felt smaller than she had in a while. And better than she had in months. Maybe things could get better. Maybe they could go back to what they had been. Maybe she could be friends with Bruce again.

She swallowed hard as she opened a door and saw him sitting there, back a bit too straight. The posture was so familiar and wonderful. In spite of the fact that he'd crushed her by leaving, that she was still mad at him for what he'd done, she smiled a very small smile. After pulling at a frayed sleeve, Carrie wrapped her arms around herself. "Hi, Bruce," she said quietly.

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darkcrusader
2009-02-08 09:45 pm UTC (link)

Bruce stood when she spoke, a small smile crossing his face. "Carrie," he said gently. He was glad she was there. Things had been different between them for a while. Maybe stretching the relationship until it broke.. Maybe that was what they needed to mend it again.

He stopped himself just short of telling her to sit, trusting her to notice that there were, in fact, chairs in the room. "There's tea, if you'd like some."

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girlwonder
2009-02-08 09:51 pm UTC (link)

Somewhere along the way, Carrie had grown used to this young Bruce Wayne. He seemed more himself standing sharp and thinner, without any grey in his hair or stubble on his chin. When she spoke, Carrie's voice sounded faint to her own ears. She wasn't so much the woman she'd grown into but the girl Bruce always known. He had that sort of effect on her. "Uh. No." Quickly, for fear of making him think that her refusal was some sort of stand against him, she added, "Thanks, though."

There was distance between them, physical and emotional. Carrie walked up to him like a scared animal, cautious that he might strike out at any moment.

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darkcrusader
2009-02-08 10:04 pm UTC (link)

Bruce nodded, not offended by her declining the tea. He was a bit unsure of how to proceed, though this didn't seem to affect his outward demeanor. He thought of a dozen things to say, but none of them made it out just yet, each thought being tucked away into a little corner to await the proper time.

He watched her, disheartened by her caution. She could probably sense the same in him. Impulsively, perhaps, he moved forward and wrapped his arms around her in a fatherly embrace.

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girlwonder
2009-02-08 10:09 pm UTC (link)

Even as Carrie's brain screamed for distance, for logic and thought and caution, instinct seemed to take over. And instinct would never have her push Bruce away. She was only a little slow to return the hug. Exhaling quietly, Carrie's arms went around Bruce's neck. She buried her face in his neck.

"I don't know what to say," she admitted, voice muffled because she was stuck against him.

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darkcrusader
2009-02-08 10:36 pm UTC (link)

"Me neither," he confessed, loosening his arms some so that she wouldn't feel compelled to let the hug last longer than comfort permitted. "I'm glad you came." Even as he said it, he felt some weight leave his chest. It felt as though it had been much longer than it actually had been.

"It was nice," he said quietly. "You and Dick being young again. Being here. It was nice."

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girlwonder
2009-02-08 10:46 pm UTC (link)

When she pulled away, Carrie realized the world was a little blurry around the edges. She swiped at her eyes with her sleeve. "It was," she nodded, maybe a little too vigorously. Carrie didn't want to draw too much attention to her bright eyes. "I've missed you. And I've missed... all that fun stuff that came with being your sidekick." She exhaled noisily and sucked in a deep breath of air. "I've missed you a lot."

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darkcrusader
2009-02-08 10:53 pm UTC (link)

He smiled softly. There was a sadness tugging at him, but he wouldn't let it win. He knew that too soon, Robin-Dick would be leaving for college. Bruce, the man who had a back-up plan for every back-up plan, didn't quite know what he was going to do when that day came.

"I miss that too." He knew it wasn't the same for her. He hadn't gone as long as she had, with an alternate version of her. But it had still been too long. "I've missed you too."

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	girlwonder 2009-02-08 10:58 pm UTC (link)
	"You left," Carrie blurted, wanting to kick herself almost immediately for not being even the slightest bit elegant with her words. Her jaw tightened a little and after a small sigh, she straightened her shoulders. "You really don't remember any of it?" (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	darkcrusader 2009-02-08 11:34 pm UTC (link)
	"I don't. I've been researching the events leading up to it and I think I understand it.." he sighed. She didn't need the detective right now. He shook his head and pushed the lingering thoughts away. The important thing was that he knew enough of what happened to make sure that he didn't repeat the mistake. "Carrie, I won't leave you again." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

girlwonder
2009-02-09 04:59 pm UTC (link)

For a brief, childish moment, Carrie frowned and was tempted to shout at him that he shouldn't have left in the first place. But Bruce already knew that going had been a mistake. He was forced to pick up pieces that he hadn't left broken. It wasn't fair to him, but that was how it would be for a while. Carrie was still upset at him and it wasn't going to go away.

Her arms were crossed over her chest and her pose was defensive. In spite of this, there was something very soft in her face. "Even if he shows up again and somebody gets hurt? And," she paused for a second, "If you think you understand could you maybe tell me what the hell you were thinking? You didn't even say goodbye."

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darkcrusader
2009-02-09 08:29 pm UTC (link)

"Especially not then," he said, his voice quiet and firm on that point. He leaned against the armchair in a forced casual pose.

He frowned, thinking. He didn't like the way his explanation would sound outloud. "There are.. different parts of me, Carrie." All of the memories, all of the different lives he'd led. He spoke slowly. "I think a part of me--a part I wish I didn't have--took over."

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girlwonder
2009-02-09 08:34 pm UTC (link)

Up until his departure, Carrie had had an unshakable faith in Bruce. That was broken now. That lost innocence couldn't return. She might have been more forgiving, more understanding of what he was saying months ago. Now it just didn't make sense to her. Shaking her head a little, Carrie sighed quietly. "What's to say that side won't take over again?" She watched him closely.

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	darkcrusader 2009-02-09 09:19 pm UTC (link)
	"I know that it's there now. I won't let it." Being aware of one's weaknesses gave them the opportunity to compensate for them. The tightness in his voice was the only outward indication of his discomfort. "You're my strength. All of you. You keep me," sane? Perhaps not quite. "Grounded. I don't intend to forget that." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

girlwonder
2009-02-09 09:33 pm UTC (link)

Any other person who hadn't grown up beside Bruce might have thought him incredibly cavalier. But Carrie noticed the signs and heard it in his voice that he was stretching a little thin. It was nice to know that he was uncomfortable. It was an uncomfortable situation all around. "You can't forget that," Carrie said. "If you leave again..." She exhaled. "There won't be anything for you to come back to." After a short pause, she added, "Except Jason, I guess. He doesn't seem to get hurt." She almost smiled.

"You have to fix things with everybody. Cassandra and Dick. The little one." She'd been staring at the carpet and only just managed to meet his eyes as she spoke, "Probably should talk to mine, too."

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	darkcrusader 2009-02-09 10:20 pm UTC (link)
	"I won't," he said. "I won't leave." Not by choice. He couldn't lose them. He nodded. "I know. I will." He'd try, at least. It wouldn't be easy, he knew that. But he was incredibly stubborn, and he wouldn't give up until things were right. It didn't matter how long it took. "I need you, Carrie. I'm not about to jeopardize that." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	girlwonder 2009-02-10 10:03 am UTC (link)
	"Okay," Carrie said. She didn't have anything any more elegant to add. More to give her hands something to do, she raised a hand and brushed it against her cheek. "I want to work with you again," she said. "But I don't know if I'll trust you like I used to." She felt guilty even thinking this sort of thought, so to say it out loud made her feel worse. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	darkcrusader 2009-02-10 10:51 am UTC (link)
	His jaw set. That stung, but the outward signs of that were minimal. He nodded. Trust was important for sidekicks, and essential for partners. It had taken him some time to grow to trust his Robins. He didn't think the tables would be turned. "I'll have to earn it back," he said finally. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	girlwonder 2009-02-10 10:55 am UTC (link)
	"Yeah," Carrie said. "I'm..." she faltered and sighed heavily. "I'm sorry." She felt like a bad sidekick and a bad daughter for having lost faith in him. But she just couldn't really get those old feelings of an almost religious reverence for him back. She respected Bruce. She loved Bruce. But she couldn't look up to him and see Batman, the god anymore. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	darkcrusader 2009-02-10 03:36 pm UTC (link)
	"It's fine," he said. It wasn't, but Bruce wasn't one to feel sorry for himself. He found himself reassuring his family and his now ex-girlfriend that it was all right to be angry with him. "You don't need to apologize." She had every right to feel the way she did. Bruce took a seat and poured two cups of tea. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	girlwonder 2009-02-10 03:39 pm UTC (link)
	Carrie exhaled. She knew it wasn't fine, but she wasn't going to say anything else on the matter. Instead of speak, she just followed closely behind him and sat down across from him. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	darkcrusader 2009-02-10 08:43 pm UTC (link)
	Bruce offered Carrie a cup before taking his own. "How is Dick?" he asked, leaning back slightly. Generally the small talk came before the deep conversation. Small chat was better than one of them getting up and walking out. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	girlwonder 2009-02-11 07:42 am UTC (link)
	Carrie took her cup and took a sip before setting it aside. She leaned forward in her chair and rested her hands on the little table. Her features softened at the mention of Dick. "He's okay. He's good, actually. He's been running things and probably way too busy, with his own job and Nightwing work. But," her smile was warm, "he's good. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	darkcrusader 2009-02-11 10:18 pm UTC (link)
	Bruce nodded, smiling some. "Good." He took a sip of his tea, pleased to see Carrie happy. "Good. I'd like to see him sometime soon." He rubbed his brow thoughtfully. Things were always a little strained between Batman and Nightwing. Maybe because they never dealt with anything. Hm. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

girlwonder
2009-02-13 10:33 am UTC (link)

Carrie tried not to look amused. "You should," she nodded. But she knew the two of them well enough to know that they wouldn't really deal with an issue. Carrie imagined their reunion to be full of long silences and manly handshakes. The two of them were just too alike in some respects. It would take something Very big for them to come together and really talk. Carrie was tempted to try, but didn't want to mess with their relationship. "I think he'd like to see you."

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