He would be lying if he said it hadn't bothered him. But he's not given to lies, and he is a poor liar even when he's made the attempt.
But on the other hand, he has often thought himself unworthy of being loved: he is naiive and clumsy when it comes to matters of the heart, and it is territory that has proven treacherous whenever he has ventured into it.
But for all that Victoria hurt him, he still could not find it in himself to hate her. Perhaps the adage of love being blind is true. He certainly had been blind then. Is he so blind now?
He had offered to father a child with her, misunderstanding entirely that she had really meant that she wanted his help with the paperwork of adoption. A miscommunication, on her part, and an assumption on his. He has never thought of himself as a potential father; much less a good one. But he had not offered out of a sense of duty.
"I wanted ... " he pauses, trying to think it through. "I wanted ... the impossible."