InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "I'm not being ridiculous!"

Steve Rogers/Captain America (kicksnaziass) wrote in utr_logs,
@ 2009-01-04 00:44:00

Entry tags:

pepper potts, steve rogers

Who: Steve, OPEN to Pepper or Tony
What: Oogling at the napping baby!
Where: Olivia's room
When: Late at night

Avoidance wasn't something Steve was generally used to in his life. Normally he liked to face things head on but when it came to Tony, Pepper and their child he preferred to fade into the background. They'd been so good to him the past few months and now he was trying to return the favor by staying away. Yet he was curious about the child; he wanted to see her and so he waited in his own room for Tony and Pepper to finally retire to bed. Once he was certain the two were asleep he slipped out of his room on quiet feet and stepped into the baby's room.

He headed over to her crib and peered into it, a smile blooming on his face as he studied the sleep redheaded girl swaddled safely in bed. Reaching down with very gently fingers he touched her cheek, immediately pulling back when Olivia twitched. Best not to touch her, then, he decided and instead found himself okay with just watching the sleeping child. It awakened something in him, a paternal instinct. Of course Steve was an all American man who wanted a wife and children but life hadn't seemed to have that in mind with him. So instead he'd just try and live through Tony and Pepper from a distance. He'd put on a smile whenever approached and would avoid their bed, most certainly.

Yes, he was aware he was loved but he also knew where priorities laid and they were not with him then. With a little sigh he brushed some hair out of his face and just studied the small child in the crib.

(Post a new comment)

pepperedsnark
2009-01-04 03:16 am UTC (link)

It was a wonder that Tony had let the baby out of his arms. To be honest, the only time Pepper got to hold her own baby was when the little girl had to be fed. And then she'd be handed right back over to Tony after. So she'd been taking to sneaking out of the room when Tony was asleep so that she could spend some time bonding with her baby. Plus the kid had to eat every couple of hours anyway.

Getting up quietly without waking Tony and then padded into the hall very quietly and went into the baby's room. Surprisingly she had been feeling really well since she'd been home from the hospital and not too tired. She opened the door to find Steve there. "Oh hi.." she whispered, smiling.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

	kicksnaziass 2009-01-04 03:25 am UTC (link)
	Steve jumped in surprise and almost tripped over himself. Actually, he really did trip over himself since he didn't dare grab onto the crib to stop his fall. So he crashed to the ground with a dull thud, holding back a groan as he rolled onto his back and looked at Pepper. "Hi." He stated quietly. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

pepperedsnark
2009-01-04 03:35 am UTC (link)

She hadn't meant to scare him but there wasn't any way around it when they were trying to keep Tony asleep, and the baby for that matter. "Oh god, I'm sorry," she went over to go help him up. The baby was probably going to start crying any minute now though. Ah well. Pepper went over to help him up off the ground, "are you okay? I didn't mean to scare you. I should have knocked but I didn't know you were in here."

She hoped he hadn't hurt himself.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kicksnaziass 2009-01-04 03:37 am UTC (link)
	"Its fine, Pepper. Really." He waved her away when she tried to help him up, getting back up onto his own two feet and keeping his voice low. After all, he didn't want to wake up the baby. Glancing at the infant he then glanced back at Pepper. "Couldn't sleep?" (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

pepperedsnark
2009-01-04 03:39 am UTC (link)

"Are you sure?" Well it was like her to fuss over him anyway, she had to take care of everyone in the house, that was her job. When he got back up to his feet she went over to rub the baby's back to make sure she didn't wake up or start crying. "Not really. And it's almost time for her to eat. I guess I can't stop myself."

She glanced back up at him, "what about you? insomnia?"

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kicksnaziass 2009-01-04 03:41 am UTC (link)
	"I just don't sleep much in general. I don't particularly need it and some nights...the dreams aren't worth it." Steve shrugged a little bit and watched Pepper with the baby. It was pathetic how he could see his own future wife fawning over an infant of his own loins. A man could wish, after all. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	pepperedsnark 2009-01-04 03:46 am UTC (link)
	Her head nodded a little, "Gotcha.." she ran the back of her fingers over the baby's cheek. "I guess I just keep worrying that she's okay in here by herself even though she is and Jarvis would tell us if she wasn't. But it's a good place to come think anyway.." she smiled up at him. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kicksnaziass 2009-01-04 03:54 am UTC (link)
	"Yeah? I'd probably worry too. I'd like to keep any child of mine in bed with me but I'd fear I would smother them." He smiled a little shyly and glanced back at the baby. "She's beautiful though, Pepper. Beautiful and healthy and the safest baby in the world right now." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	pepperedsnark 2009-01-04 03:59 am UTC (link)
	"Yeah.. I'd do that. I mean we'd do that. Just. Well I'm surprised that Tony doesn't to be honest." And by that she meant holding the kid all to himself but hey. "Thank you, she is yeah. I'm so glad she's here finally. It felt like I was pregnant forever. I kind of want another one but I think Tony is going to put his foot down." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kicksnaziass 2009-01-04 04:01 am UTC (link)
	That made Steve slightly curious. Why would Tony, who loved the child they had, not want another? With a little thoughtful frown he studied Pepper. "Why doesn't he want another? He certainly loves Olivia enough." He pointed out. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	pepperedsnark 2009-01-04 04:06 am UTC (link)
	"I guess because he thinks it's too much strain on me. It took.. so long for me to get pregnant the last time. I guess he doesn't want to jinx it again. I don't know. Maybe down the road when Olivia's a little older." she looked down at the baby and then back up at Steve. "He's just over protective." That was putting it mildly. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kicksnaziass 2009-01-04 04:12 am UTC (link)
	"Well, I mean...you know your own limits, don't you? Not that I know anything about pregnancy. Maybe you could just talk to a doctor about it first? If you really want one." Steve shrugged a little bit. "I always wanted a big family." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	pepperedsnark 2009-01-04 04:17 am UTC (link)
	"Yeah I'm going to. I just think that even if she said it was okay he might put his foot down as a just in case. You now how Tony is," her eyes kind of rolled. "I'm sure you'll have one soon and then our kids can grow up together. It'll be fun. Make sure you check with the woman though since she's the one pushing them out." She winked at him. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kicksnaziass 2009-01-04 04:23 am UTC (link)
	Of course he smiled a little in return to her comment but he couldn't help shaking his head. "I don't think so." He replied with a shrug, glancing back at Olivia. "I don't tend to randomly run into women. Those I do I'm usually saving and they have little interest." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

pepperedsnark
2009-01-04 04:27 am UTC (link)

Pepper frowned a bit, "Don't say that. There's lots and lots of nice single girls all over that message board. You just have to you know. Weed out the very scary ones." which there were some around. A lot of some, but there were lots of nice people too.

"I could tell Terra. Somehow I think she'd be perfect at that sort of thing. Um you know, if you could put up with her helping.." since Terra had a .. very big mouth. She meant well though.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

kicksnaziass
2009-01-04 04:32 am UTC (link)

"I don't know if being...set up on dates is something that would be best for me." To be honest Steve didn't know what was best. "I guess I just have this ridiculous old fashioned idea in my head of meeting a girl at random and falling in love at first sight."

He'd felt sort of that way with Psyche but she...didn't seem to return his feelings. So of course he'd never mentioned it.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	pepperedsnark 2009-01-04 04:37 am UTC (link)
	"I don't blame you. It's not for everyone. Just keep your eyes open. You just have to keep positive." She paused, "That sounded horribly superficial.. sorry. We just want you to be happy." Then she paused again. "I just want you to be happy. Shouldn't speak for everyone I guess. Until then you've got.. us.. me.." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kicksnaziass 2009-01-04 04:43 am UTC (link)
	"And you have Tony. You both have each other." Steve scoffed but smiled none the less. Always smiling. He never wanted anyone to know anything was wrong. "And the baby." Which he cast a glance over at the crib. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	pepperedsnark 2009-01-04 04:47 am UTC (link)
	"We love you.. you know that right? I mean I know that.. it's not enough. I get that. But we do. Very much. And the baby's going to know how much we love you too." She wanted him to be around at least. "And you can even babysit as much as you want." she grinned a little. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

kicksnaziass
2009-01-04 04:49 am UTC (link)

"I doubt you'll ever need a babysitter. Tony probably would let me anyway." Steve was good enough to have sex with, but not good enough to have the child be left with him. Oh. That was a nasty thought and he immediately shook it off.

"I know you guys do but you...are starting a family. A real family." In other words, there was no place for him. He was just a fuck on the side for Tony. That is the only thing that made him special. Outside of that he was just another friend.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

pepperedsnark
2009-01-04 01:20 pm UTC (link)

"Of course he would. Besides it's as much my decision as it is his. And I say yes. Clearly my vote over rules his," because it usually did when she put her mind to something. "You would be such an amazing father, I know you'll take good care of Olivia.." Any one could see that, right?

Her head tilted and she turned to him. "You're our family too, Steve. Don't think like that. We want you as a part of this family. A real part. You just have to let us in." She wasn't sure he could do that, but she wanted him to at least try.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

kicksnaziass
2009-01-04 02:37 pm UTC (link)

It was hard for Steve to let people in. He'd been through a lot in his long life. He'd seen the ones he loved and cared for die and a lot of the time he blamed himself for it. However he didn't see it. He didn't see how he pushed people away but he did none the less.

"I don't want to get in your way, Pepper. You and Tony...will probably get married someday. You'll have your daughter to raise." There wasn't any place for him in a proper family.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

pepperedsnark
2009-01-04 02:51 pm UTC (link)

"You're not in our way, Steve. You never will be. I don't know if we'll get married, but that's not going to change how we feel about you." She understood pushing people away, that was for sure. "I understand wanting.. a family of your own. I just.. we want you to be with us until that time comes."

Carefully she put her hand on top of his. "We're always going to be here. You can't get rid of us. We're not going anywhere, no matter what you decide."

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kicksnaziass 2009-01-04 03:03 pm UTC (link)
	"I don't quite feel as if I'm welcome with you two anymore. Tony dotes on Olivia nearly 24/7. He doesn't wish to spend time with me anymore. You are busy with the baby as well and I feel selfish for wanting...both of you to myself sometimes." Steve looked away in the direction of the window, sighing. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	pepperedsnark 2009-01-04 03:18 pm UTC (link)
	Pepper frowned, "I'm sorry we made you feel that way. So sorry, we haven't meant to shut you out. You're not selfish, Steve. Not any more then the rest of us are." She gave his hand a little squeeze. "I'm here, aren't I? If you want time with me, you can just say so. I want to spend time with you.. alone." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)