Tweak

InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "We don't need rings."

Sable Skwigelf, nee. Harris (ex_sable973) wrote in utr_logs,
@ 2008-11-26 21:18:00

Entry tags:

cassidy turner, sable harris

WHO: Sable Harris and Cassidy Turner
WHAT: ...doing... some stuff.
WHERE: Mostly, an abandoned castle in France.
WHEN: Now ish.
WARNINGS: ...you never know. You just NEVER know.

-----

It takes Sable a little while to find the cabin, but she eventually does. Cass will find her on his doorstep dressed to fit the part of the gypsy, in colorful clothes and a long skirt, carrying a backpack over one shoulder.

"So. Are you ready?"

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1stbornextreme
2008-11-26 08:30 pm UTC (link)

Cassidy was bundled up in a winter coat and he tilted his head, "You're totally not prepared for this." He muttered, walking back in for a brief moment to get her a winter coat. He wrapped it over her shoulders and smiled briefly, "Just because it's a different country, doesn't mean it's not going to be cold." He kissed Sable's forehead lightly, before walking to the end of the block, where the portkey was, with his arm around her shoulders.

"I'm sorry I've been acting like a dick to you lately, it's not personal, Sabey, I love you very much. I just... Things have been freaking me out, lately." The scent of alcohol was on his breath, and he was speaking more deliberately clearly, but otherwise, things seemed normal as ever, for him.

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	ex_sable973 2008-11-26 08:33 pm UTC (link)
	She slips an arm around his waist and returns the kiss to his cheek in thanks for the coat. The scent of alcohol doesn't faze her. It's always on her father, and frequently on her customers. She understands it. "I'm sorry, too, Cass," she replies as they walk together. "For not understanding." (Reply to this)

1stbornextreme
2008-11-26 08:42 pm UTC (link)

"It's okay. I don't expect you to get me completely, you barely know me." He said with a sigh. His fingers teased the ends of her hair, as he tapped the portkey with his foot. They found themselves in the woods in southern France, which was cool, but not as bitterly cold as it was in Switzerland. He unzipped his coat and led her up a hill, picking up dry sticks, here and there. "Start picking up dry wood, we can make a fire in the fireplace that's there." He smiled slightly. "Hopefully the walls are still stable enough to climb, I'm going to have to make sure the flue is cleared out." He grinned slightly, squeezing her shoulders before bouncing up the hill, on what was once an obvious path, but was now overgrown with long grass.

The walls of the castle came into full view just then, and sure enough, it was a full castle, without ceiling or floors. Trees had grown through the main hall, and had tangled their branches around the tall arches and columns.

"Wow, it's prettier than I remember."

(Reply to this)

	ex_sable973 2008-11-26 08:45 pm UTC (link)
	Sable breathes a soft gasp as she sees it. "Oh, Cass... this is amazing." She squeezes his hand once, tightly, before setting off at a run towards the castle, her grin challenging him to race her. (Reply to this)

1stbornextreme
2008-11-26 08:48 pm UTC (link)

He chuckled and tucked the bundle of sticks he had under his arm more securely before dashing off after her. He found the hearth shortly afterwards, and set the bundle down. "Keep looking for sticks!" He said with a grin, before he started scaling the wall to go and poke a longer stick down the flue, making sure there was no nest of rabid weasels in it or something. As luck would have it, whatever nest that WAS in there was empty, and he easily pushed it down into the hearth. "Hello, new kindling!" He joked.

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ex_sable973
2008-11-26 08:52 pm UTC (link)

She drops her backpack as soon as they get inside the castle walls and takes a few moments just to spin around in it before dashing off again to find more kindling and clear out some of the debris from the "inside" of the castle. Cass is provided quickly with ample kindling and a few larger logs that seemed dry enough to be worth trying to burn. She stops her flurry of motion to fold her arms around his shoulders from behind, and over his chest.

"Cassie, how did you find it? Does it belong to anyone?"

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1stbornextreme
2008-11-26 08:57 pm UTC (link)

Cass put his hands over her arms, chuckling softly. "Like I said, I do a lot of hiking. I asked some people in the town about a mile and a half away if there was any story behind the ruins here, and they said all they know is that there's stories of this forest being haunted. They're like the French version of Amish people, they're really superstitious so they never come near here. I don't think anyone owns it."

He looked around at the ruins. "Someone did, once, that's for sure. Don't anymore, though."

He slipped away to start making a proper configuration of the wood, and pulled out his lighter. "See, this is why I prefer to have Soren around. He always makes fires look so easy." He muttered, trying to get the kindling to light. It took considerably longer.

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ex_sable973
2008-11-26 09:02 pm UTC (link)

"Maybe we should give them some ghosts to find," Sable suggests cryptically with a sly grin as she lets go of him and sets about clearing a little space around the fire so that it's comfortable for them to sit or sprawl near the warmth. She lugs her backpack over from where she left it in a tuft of taller grass near the entrance.

"I brought a blanket to sit on, and some food and drinks, if you want."

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1stbornextreme
2008-11-26 09:08 pm UTC (link)

"You're a doll!" He said, bouncing slightly as he went to hug her. He grinned and helped her spread out the blanket, and took a seat. "Sable, I've been meaning to really apologize about how I've been treating you. It's not fair of me to act like I do. I just don't know how to feel about things lately. I've been more or less losing any sense of normalcy in my life that I used to have, and it's really wigging me out. I guess I've been taking it out on you."

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ex_sable973
2008-11-26 09:18 pm UTC (link)

Sable pulls a loaf of bread from her bag and sets it close to the fire to warm it as she unpacks with it a wedge of cheese, a little container full of pomegranate seeds, a bottle of wine, a thermos of coffee, and various utensils.

"It's no feast," she says apologetically, "but it's all good. I took a portkey to Ireland for the bread and cheese, and there's some chocolate in the bag I got from Denmark..."

As the bread and the fire warm up, she scoots a little closer to Cass, not looking at him, but not AVOIDING looking at him either.

"I'm sorry, too, you know. Whether I need to be or not. I've lost focus, too. I've always been so good at dealing with... things like this. I don't know why I've been so awkward and undiplomatic and confused with you. All of you. I don't blame you at all, Cassie, I really don't. I know I'm the one here who doesn't belong, and you were here first. I really am trying to figure it out. I want to know you the way you've known me since you were a kid. And... I do love you, Cassie. I don't know if I've ever made it clear to you just how much I really, really love you." There's so much sincerity in her voice it almost breaks.

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1stbornextreme
2008-11-26 09:26 pm UTC (link)

"Stop thinking you don't belong. You belong just as much as I do. I'm sick of you thinking you're the odd one out. You're my cousin, you're my best friend's fiancee. You're not allowed to think that way anymore." He wrapped his arms around her and buried his head in her hair. "If there's any way I can make you feel more involved, let me know. I want you to be there with us for Yule. I want you to be with us all the time, but you're too busy at the store most of the time. Stop putting yourself outside the group. You're a part of it." He tugged her onto his lap and cuddled her close. "Sabey, you want to come to Thanksgiving with me tomorrow? My mom and dad are throwing a big thing." He smiled. "I'm taking Henn with me, but you're family, too."

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ex_sable973
2008-11-26 09:45 pm UTC (link)

She pulls her cousin into a tight hug.

"I'm not trying to put myself outside the group. I'd really wanted to try to give you whatever space you wanted. I really do want so, so badly to be a part of you, all of you. I'd like..." She pauses, seeming suddenly uncharactistically shy, not used to asking for things she doesn't think are hers by right, "I'd like to go with you when you and Soren... do things. Not all the time, but sometimes. I know it'll be kind of awkward and weird at first but it'll never stop if we don't TRY to see if we can get over it. I'd like to come over and sleep at your house on slow nights when there's no one in the shop, and help Henn or you cook dinner, and just... be there. I can't give up the shop, Cassie. It's a good income, and besides that, I get a lot of people in there who actually need real help -- things Judah and my register girls can't give them. It's not just a job. It's... my life, sort of. And it's my home. I've never had a place that was mine before. I don't know what I'd do if I wasn't doing this."

She sighs and leans her head on Cass's shoulder.

"I will come tomorrow. I've arranged with Judah and some of my regulars to keep the shop open all day. I spent most of today preparing things so there's food for anyone who wants it. I know they don't celebrate Thanksgiving in England, but they all know I'm American, and I like to give them something just because it's a good thing to do. I love being with uncle Teague and aunt Bren and everyone else. And you. And yeah... I do want to spend Christmas with you. I'd love that. If it's okay, I'd like to help you guys prepare too, and decorate..."

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1stbornextreme
2008-11-26 09:54 pm UTC (link)

"I'm not saying you should give up your shop, Sable. I'm saying you should stop putting it between yourself and us. I have a job, Soren and Henn have jobs too, but you don't see any of us using it as a block between each other. It's great that you help out people, but sometimes, we need help, too. It depends entirely upon you what you think is more important. Who you think is more important. If you want to spend all the time in the store, that's your decision. But... you've always been welcome, and you always ARE welcome to stay with us, and be with us. You're family. You're IMPORTANT."

He nudged her slightly. "And we miss you when you're not around. This entire time at the cabin has been less one beautiful presence and we all have felt it. Take time off, and come spend it with us. Please. Don't just... go and be someone we don't know. It makes me sad that you're always just... somewhere else when I need you the most. And it makes me sad when Soren needs to go to you, instead of you already being where we are."

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	ex_sable973 2008-11-26 09:57 pm UTC (link)
	She might, just might, be a little misty-eyed, and there may just be a slight tremor in her voice when she speaks. "You need me?" (Reply to this)

	1stbornextreme 2008-11-26 10:00 pm UTC (link)
	"More than I know how to express, Sable." He muttered softly, petting through her hair. "We all do." He really couldn't help but let a few tears fall, himself. (Reply to this)

ex_sable973
2008-11-26 10:10 pm UTC (link)

"Aww, Cassie!" She pounces him in a tight hug, petting his hair back and rocking him, protective as a mama wolf, but not ultimately all that maternal.

"I want to come home, Cassie. I know that means with you. It's just scary, okay? You get so mad sometimes and I can't understand why. I'm usually really good at stuff like that, I just can't ever guess right with you. I can't ever fix it or solve the puzzle so I wonder if it's because you really would rather just have Soren to yourself and won't tell either of us or what..." Her voice breaks a little more as she nuzzles into his hair. "I don't want to hurt you, Cassie, but I don't know how NOT to. And if you... all of you... really want me there... I'll try to find someone who can run the shop when I'm not there so I can come home to you."

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1stbornextreme
2008-11-26 10:25 pm UTC (link)

He huffed and shook his head, "It's nothing personal, I told you. I'm jealous, yeah, but I don't want him all to myself. That wouldn't make anyone happy. I just want... him around with you more. It's like this, Sabe. When he goes off to be with you, who knows what he's doing? You know? The whole thing with him being with Judah for at least a month after we started this... it made me wonder if he wasn't doing other things, too. He wouldn't do that to you, but he did that to me. He's happy with you. He doesn't want anything else. But for a while..." He shook his head and sighed deeply.

"I trust him, but not that much. And there's other stuff, too. It's nothing against you, but it might seem like that. You don't get me very well yet. You know I've got... issues. I don't really know what to say about it. I'm not the deeply sharing kind of guy Soren is. I don't lay myself bare. It takes a lot for me to explain it." He took a deep breath, and tried to collect his thoughts, sort them into some semblance of order, before explaining to her.

"I have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. The shrinks said that it's a moderate case, but could wind up severe without my constant working at it. They said it stems from a perceived lack of control, as did my anorexia when I was around 14. Luckily for me, I'm past that part, but when I got past it, my OCD swung into full gear. If I don't have some semblance of control in what goes on around me, I flip out. Instead of internalizing it or being self-destructive, I tend to do other things. I count my footsteps, I keep things lined up. I wash everything twice, I won't buy certain things because they have the number 6 in the price. Stuff like that. I know," he laughed softly, bitterly, "it doesn't make sense, and it sounds completely trivial, but it extends into pretty much everything I do."

He shook his head. "It's something that Soren's learned to deal with, he puts up with it pretty damn well. Henn's used to it, because her folks are the same level of crazy, in different ways."

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ex_sable973
2008-11-26 10:39 pm UTC (link)

Sable listens quietly and attentively to all Cass says. At some point about midway through, she reaches to take the bread from the fire, breaks off a couple of pieces, slices some cheese to put on them, and hands one to Cass.

"I should be used to it. I am used to it, in anyone but you. And I think it's because you're more than a psychological formula to me, and I'm more than a source of fixing problems for a couple of shows to you. It's hard because you're not the kind of person I usually deal with who has your kinds of problems. You're not used to being placated with the usual response and even if you were, I can't give you that because... because I love you."

She nibbles her bread and cheese and headbutts his shoulder.

"Make you a deal, cousin-mine. I'll try my best to figure you out, if you try to tell me what I do wrong if it upsets you and let me try to fix it. Okay?"

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1stbornextreme
2008-11-26 10:44 pm UTC (link)

Cassidy nibbled at the bread and cheese, shaking his head with a small chuckle, looking at her. "It's not a matter of you doing something wrong or anything. I told you, it's not personal. It's not about you." He leaned over to the backpack to get the wine.

"But if you do, I'll let you know. It's a good deal. You still have to spend more time with us. Like you said... you're home, when you're with us. And it's not home without you."

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ex_sable973
2008-11-26 10:49 pm UTC (link)

She curls up beside him and pours him a little wine.

"I know it's not about me to you, but it is to me, because the only way I can make it not be about me right now is to take the me part away from it." She pours herself a little wine, too, and takes a sip.

"If I were to ask you if I could start moving in with you guys -- like, move some of my stuff over there and start spending the night -- what would you say?"

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1stbornextreme
2008-11-26 10:53 pm UTC (link)

"I'd say do it or I'll freak out and think you hate me." He chuckled, nudging her slightly. "We're staying in the cabin for the winter. It's close to the slopes, and Soren loves snow. That, and being in our house for the winter... it's so damn rainy all the time." He visibly shuddered and took a drink of wine.

"Please, come stay with us. I would be so happy. You'd make us all happy."

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	ex_sable973 2008-11-26 10:55 pm UTC (link)
	"You know you're gonna make me cry again, Cassie," she says quietly as she tugs him close. "You know, it's funny you say that... about thinking I hate you... I was starting to think maybe you didn't like me." (Reply to this)

1stbornextreme
2008-11-26 10:59 pm UTC (link)

"No, I just hate going all the way to London to hang out with someone. Only reason you'll catch me there is to go to my folks' house or go pester Bill and Jack. I hate London. It's so dreary all the time." He shook his head. "You have no idea how much I dislike just... everything, about that city. I grew up there."

He squeezed her around the waist before he pulled away to dip the bread in the wine and snarf it down. "I love you and your fluffy goofy self. I just fail at interacting with about 90 percent of females."

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ex_sable973
2008-11-26 11:05 pm UTC (link)

"You got a wife. That's better than a lot of guys do, trust me."

She sniffs back the lump in her throat and quickly leans forward to kiss him on the lips. It's not a lover's kiss, just a swift, shy peck.

"Will you come see me sometimes, though? I know you hate london, but my shop's warm and quiet and I have tea and biscuits and things, and Miniver's there a lot. He'd love to see you around as much as I would."

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	1stbornextreme 2008-11-26 11:09 pm UTC (link)
	"I'll try, but you can't use it as an excuse anymore. You have to come live with us. We're all sad that you're never with us." He pouted dramatically, entirely put on. He smiled slightly and finished his wine before he moved to warm his hands by the fire. "So... If this place isn't owned by anyone in particular, and if it's up for sale... would you like it as a Christmas gift?" (Reply to this)

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