"I shouldn't have left." He was almost pouting as he said it, and kept walking to the bar. The hand that remained on his shoulder told him that James was following. It comforted Remus. Maybe now he could explain himself, ask for help...
"I will be," he said. It was as close to the truth as he would let himself get, though it wasn't nearly as secretive as he usually was. Usually, he would've said he was fine, smiled, offered some excuse with a cheerful attitude and been on his way, telling James to go back to Sirius lest the poor chap get bored and leave with the most attractive person in the place before he could have the chance to get his drink. Instead, he couldn't muster the energy. He felt strange, today. Ever since he'd gotten up early because of the storm, he'd been doing things differently, saying more than he normally did. It was like he didn't care. Remus didn't care at all what James or Sirius or anyone else thought of him; he felt the way he felt and it seemed to him that the best way to get it to stop once and for all was to admit it and find a fix to it rather than sweeping it under the rug and letting it pile up as he usually chose to do.
They arrived at the bar where Remus ordered rum. "Actually, I'll take the bottle. Thanks." There really was no denying he had a bit of a problem now. "Can I get a glass as well?" he asked when the barkeep handed him the bottle.
He then turned to James. It took him a while to find the words. "He's... Pucey sent me that, because he wanted me to know that... James..." Looking at his friend wasn't working, and Remus started pouring himself a glass. "I like him. Sirius. I- ...But he's never, he would never go for someone like me. He likes people like Pucey, all he wants is the shag. He doesn't want the long-term and." It all made so much more sense in his head and Remus, frustrated, took a drink. It burned on the way down and he had to blink away a few tears. "What if I told you that I was interested in Sirius? And that we'd... discussed what he wanted in a... in a partner, and that I honestly..., for a minute, I thought I might stand a chance, and then he goes, and he shags Pucey and Pucey sends me this thing and. I'll be alright. I'll get over it. It's the baggage."