InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Pants are for the weak."

Lucifer (morningbringer) wrote in undertherainbow,
@ 2010-02-21 02:21:00

Entry tags:

erik northman, lucifer, mary

The odds against any particular individual existing are astounding.

Roughly one hundred million sperm are in the typical volume of semen that one ejaculates during a sexual encounter. A woman can only become pregnant roughly a quarter of the time, and a conservative estimate for miscarriages is roughly twenty-five percent, most of which happen without the woman ever knowing she was pregnant. The ova is one of hundreds that will be viable within a woman's lifetime. The chances of any particular individual winning the conception lottery and being born are quadrillions to one against.

And yet, despite the odds, a nigh-microscopic not-yet individual is growing in the womb of one Mary Anne McGee.

(Post a new comment)

	erikbloodred 2010-02-21 07:52 am UTC (link)
	Angels ejaculate? (Reply to this) (Thread)

	virginal_ 2010-02-21 07:54 am UTC (link)
	Sometimes with very poor aim. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	erikbloodred 2010-02-21 07:56 am UTC (link)
	Or very good aim and very poor manners, I'd assume. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	virginal_ 2010-02-21 07:57 am UTC (link)
	Oh, with him, it's anyone's guess. At least he offers to wash my hair sometimes afterward. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	erikbloodred 2010-02-21 07:58 am UTC (link)
	And they say Lucifer was selfish. That's outright considerate! (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	virginal_ 2010-02-21 08:01 am UTC (link)
	He even cooks in an apron. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	erikbloodred 2010-02-21 08:03 am UTC (link)
	How quaint. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	virginal_ 2010-02-21 08:05 am UTC (link)
	You know, even if you can't eat it, every woman's a sucker for a guy in an apron and nothing but making them pancakes. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	erikbloodred 2010-02-21 08:22 am UTC (link)
	I doubt Gigi would want me anywhere near a kitchen. She's quite aware that I have the cooking skills of a neanderthal. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	virginal_ 2010-02-21 08:24 am UTC (link)
	Oh, but I'm sure she finds that attractive. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	erikbloodred 2010-02-21 08:28 am UTC (link)
	I'm positive she'd find it more attractive if I went hunting for her, instead. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	virginal_ 2010-02-21 08:30 am UTC (link)
	Oh, I'm sure, the whole bloodletting thing being erotic and all that, and you're pretty to begin with. I had fun at your wedding, by the way, you two are gorgeous together. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	erikbloodred 2010-02-21 09:03 am UTC (link)
	Thank you, Mary. I know I'm a trophy husband, but when it comes to that, at least she picked the best there is. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	virginal_ 2010-02-21 09:04 am UTC (link)
	She loves you. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	quirkyhumor 2010-02-22 06:21 am UTC (link)
	No, not a trophy husband! More like...a gift. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	virginal_ 2010-02-21 08:14 am UTC (link)
	That was the most braggy birth announcement I've ever seen. Well. Conception announcement. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	morningbringer 2010-02-21 08:20 am UTC (link)
	It's the only part of the process where I have an equal amount of influence. From here on out, you're providing all the nutrients and raw material for growing a person. I have no more room to be braggy. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	virginal_ 2010-02-21 08:24 am UTC (link)
	But you'll feed me, and that helps. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	prettylilbunny 2010-02-21 09:09 am UTC (link)
	Congratulations. And while I doubt it's the first for either of you, here's a refresher course for you on infant care. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	virginal_ 2010-02-21 09:47 am UTC (link)
	Oh, good, now I won't have to teach him anything! (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	prettylilbunny 2010-02-21 09:52 am UTC (link)
	Ah, well in that case you're welcome. My would-be daughter's father-in-law sent that to me when I was pregnant with my son, figured I should pass it on. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	hiptomyjive 2010-02-21 08:10 pm UTC (link)
	tl;dr Cookies? (Reply to this)

	quirkyhumor 2010-02-22 06:04 am UTC (link)
	giggle You're welcome! (Reply to this) (Thread)

	morningbringer 2010-02-22 06:07 am UTC (link)
	I don't take credit for your creations, please don't try to lay claim to mine. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	quirkyhumor 2010-02-22 06:11 am UTC (link)
	Oh come on, can't you take a joke? You're supposed to be Lucifer pre hissy fit. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	morningbringer 2010-02-22 06:18 am UTC (link)
	I'm making progress. I used the word "please." I didn't lead a third of your dominion in open rebellion. It's a step. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	quirkyhumor 2010-02-22 06:20 am UTC (link)
	There's the little angel with moxie that I know and love! I'm happy for you, Lucy. A baby is more precious than anything in the world. ~~I wish I could have one.~~ (Reply to this) (Parent)