OHRIGHT! You're new. Hi! I'm C.V., or Ceevee if you prefer, or even Cunning Velociraaptor, if you want to get all full-namey.
Welcome to this place that I like to call 'home', so, if you'll keep your hands and arms inside the vehicle, we can start our tour, first stop, the [welcome site] and isn't it a welcome sight? No? Not really? Yeah, figured as much.