robyngraves (robyngraves) wrote in undertherainbow, @ 2009-02-27 11:32:00 |
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Entry tags: | teja wartooth |
Haven't needed a smoke or a snort since I got back. I can't believe it took me that long to realize that. I want, but I don't need. And want is so much easier to deny.
I was about to start carving myself up the other night. I remember every scar by heart, I could have replicated my old self easy. I stopped. Most of those scars were earned, and it doesn't feel right to redo them. But my body is still too... Untainted. Getting rebranded today started me thinking. Finally I know what I want, but I don't know how to go about it. Get a tattoo, or scarification? The tattoo won't be enough to satisfy my pain needs, but they come in colors. Of course, an elaborate tat is just going to get cut up eventually, this is why I've never bothered to get one before. A scar design can get diced and just look like random old wounds after a time.
Thoughts from the body-modified in the audience?