I don't know who the fuck you are, sweetheart, but that is just about the hottest thing I've ever seen. I don't think I've ever met a woman who cussed that fucking much. I mean, I gotta say, I'm fucking impressed. And you really aren't missing anything by not coming to New York. Unless you're really fucking anxious to see Lindsay Lohan's cunt or something.
Alternate universe? What is this? Some fucking comic book? I mean...fuck me. Ah well, Perry can't kill me for losing his dry cleaning. At least it's not fucking Munchkinland or some bullshit like that.
Oh, damn. I am a private detective here. Fuck yes! Now Perry can't bitch at me about how I need to take a fucking test before I can go around calling myself a private detective. As if I don't help him solve his fucking cases. And isn't it always the gay guys that get bitchy about the stupidest fucking shit?