InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "then it fell out he window"

jack sloper (slopen) wrote in ultrarpg,
@ 2008-08-07 13:00:00

WHO Jack and Demelza.
WHAT Banjo playing and cuddles.
WHERE ~~Where the magic happens~~ Pinball Wizard HQ; Jack's bedroom.
WHEN August 7, early afternoon.
RATING PG?
STATUS Incomplete.

“Fuck yes! Fuck me, I am good.” Jack paused in his frenzy of complimenting himself “No, I am God.” Once that was settled in his head, he took a bow to his wall and held his banjo high over his head. He was God, God of the Banjo. It hadn’t taken him all that long to get the hang of playing the instrument, it wasn’t too different from the guitar, but it was still confusing considering he had never seen the instrument in real life before. He wasn’t concerned with how weird it was that a fan would actually give him an instrument like it, he just thought it was cool. And without hesitation he had taken it to his room and locked the door. At first it was frustrating because he couldn’t decide on a tune, and that was why he had grunted and groaned to himself.

Finally, after a few days, hours, minutes and seconds he was like a professional. He also felt like a bit of a farmer but that was beside the point. It didn’t take him long to parade around his flat, the banjo still attached to his hand and his face still set in that same smug expression. And then, he consulted his journal to share his excellence with friends. This gathered a weird reaction, but if he hadn’t said it, then he and Dee probably wouldn’t be meeting. If he and Dee weren’t meeting he’d be stuck doing something unproductive of his time. Not that he had much planned for when he saw Dee. He just wanted to show off, really. It wasn’t often that he got the chance to gloat and not be teased for it. Normally something good was followed by something bad – he was able to climb on the roof of his parent’s house with no equipment – but then fell down and broke his arm. That sort of thing.

Still sat on his bed, Jack strummed away at the instrument, humming softly to it like it was a small child. He waited for Dee in that position, paying no particular attention to his surroundings. His room was in the same state it had been in for weeks now, a complete pig sty. Without a girlfriend, maid or his mother around he didn’t have the motivation or the aid to keep the pit he called a room tidy or clean. The best part was that he wasn’t guilty about it, he was proud. “My name is Jack,” he brushed his fingers over the strings. “And I am a God,” he sung with a slight head bang, which didn’t fit the tune he was playing. As awesome as the banjo was, he much preferred his electric guitar.

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demelz
2008-08-07 10:01 am UTC (link)

She’d been home for just a few minutes when Jack had invited her to come over and see his banjo; which, strange enough, had been a part of her dream last night. He’d been there, a banjo had been there, and she’d been there, but that was all she could still remember clearly. Demelza had woken up thinking herself crazy because there was no point to her dream; she’d never seen Jack with a banjo, and she wasn’t going to. Or so she’d thought. Upon returning from St. Mungo’s, she’d been proven wrong and wondered if she was psychic for at least a good two minutes before closing her journal and going on her way again. Heading out the door while taking her jacket, her shout echoed throughout the apartment, telling that she was going to see Jack to Avery, even though she wasn’t at all sure whether the girl was home as there was no answer.

Demelza looked to see if everything was clear and that there were no muggles around that would faint upon the sight of her disappearing into thin air before she apparated to her destination with a pop. Taking out the spare key she had once received from the two boys, the Pinball Wizard keychain dangled from it as it twisted into the lock, opening the door. Andrew was nowhere to be seen, which was good for the bloke or else she would have stomped on his foot for implying her best friend was a whore. Not that she knew what their little argument was about, but a girl had to stick by her girl. Avery was in the right, whether she was in the wrong or not. That’s just how girl code worked. Discarding her jacket, which she really hadn’t needed at all but had just taken along to make sure, she walked to where she knew Jack would be, knowing the apartment in and out as though it was her own.

Her head peeked in when she opened the door to his bedroom, looking around the corner to see whether Jack was still there, receiving her answer when he announced that he was God. Her eyes rolled in their sockets almost instantly, although there was a smile on her face. “Hello, God,” her hello was said tiredly but happily; tired because work had drained her, happy because she was done and could spend a bit of time with Jack. It was in a matter of seconds that she had successfully climbed upon the bed, managing to avoid the banjo before curling up against his side like a cat would do once it was ready to take a nap. And while doing that was tempting, she really just wanted to talk to Jack as they hadn’t done that for a while, at least not face to face. “What’s it like in heaven?”

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slopen
2008-08-07 10:31 am UTC (link)

“Full of half naked women.” He breathed, wrapping an arm around her shoulders to keep her closer to him on his bed. If she asked or queried the action he would explain, with a confident tone, that it was to make sure she stayed on the bed. Jack couldn’t count the amount of times he had fallen off the mattress on two hands anymore. He needed to get some bed rails like a little baby had for a cot, but if he did, he’d only end up smacking his head during the night time. “We’re in heaven now, but I am puzzled.” He mocked a serious, God-like tone, and stroked his imaginary beard. “You are not naked.” He placed the banjo down at the end of his bed, careful to keep it out of kicking range. Eyebrows were fixed into a questioning frown and his lips were pursed into what he hoped looked like an authoritative expression (and not a cats arse).

His eyes ran over her body, taking in her legs, arms and body. “Instead, you’re in a nurse’s uniform.” Kinky. “God approves.” He chuckled, poking a finger into her side. “Did you come straight from work, then?” by now Jack had dropped his God tone, shaved off his beard and demolished his Godly features too. Jack didn’t truly know what it was like to work. In his area of business it wasn’t like a chore, doing what he did for a living, it was like a hobby that he was getting paid for. It was stressful, but in the end, he loved it. And it always brought good consequences. He would stay up until four in the morning playing, but a month later the tune he recorded would be a top ten hit. “How was work?” Since he didn’t have a 9-5 occupation, he could only find out what it was like from his friend. And Dee always had something weird or funny going on with her life, which he found, was the same for Avery. But he had a feeling she exaggerated a lot of the time and never knew what was true and what was false. Then again, she worked in a bar, so literally, anything could happen.

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demelz
2008-08-07 11:02 am UTC (link)

A laugh escaped her at his answer, quickly becoming a snort of disbelief. Her arm was thrown around his waist when he removed the banjo, and she cuddled against him, placing her head on his chest because he was her new bed. Quite a comfortable one, too. “I thought heaven was supposed to be all pure and stuff,” half naked women didn’t sound pure. It sounded like God was actually a pimp. She wondered what kind of car he’d drive. “Neither are you,” she tugged on the material that was nearest to her hand, which happened to be his belt. “This is not like my dream!” Not that she could actually remember if he’d been naked or not. Because that would mean she’d have some sort of sex dream about Jack. And this, in return, made her wonder whether Jack even knew she had breasts.

Weird thoughts. Right, okay, moving on.

“I didn’t change,” it was more a question than confirmation, as she really hadn’t thought about her outfit. It was a good thing she had taken a shower during her one hour break earlier and there had been no incidents with blood or gore, or she probably would have come over wrapped in nothing but a towel. Her tongue poked out at him when he prodded a finger in her side, before heaving her head for a nod. “Yeah, you should have been there,” but not really, she didn’t want him in the hospital. Only strangers that she didn’t know and wasn’t emotionally attached to could come to the hospital, or else she’d probably have some kind of mental breakdown because her friend was hurt. “There was this boy,” who was about ten years younger than her but had still been adorable, “and he swallowed a few magnets. And you know magnets, they’re like, drawn to each other and won’t lose sight of where the other is. Especially wizarding ones, those stick together like super glue. So they were basically going through every one of his organs to find each other,” her hands were making weird gestures, as though she could explain what the hell she was babbling about through that. “If we hadn’t taken them out, he would have died.”

She took a breath, becoming quiet for a while as she thought about it. She was glad Jack really wasn’t God, or else he would have been dead, or just not with her. Her arm tightened around his waist, nestling deeper against him just to make sure he wasn’t leaving. Sometimes her work just wasn’t pleasurable and even helping people didn’t cheer her up. “How was your day, then?”

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slopen
2008-08-07 12:59 pm UTC (link)

Was God really male? Did God have a beard? Was God white? Did God exist? Jack hated questions like that, if God was really real – then somebody needed to prove it before he believed there was a guy sitting in the sky. Questions like that rarely popped up at school, but the TV and a few magazines his Nan read brought up the topic regularly. His mum didn’t believe, his dad didn’t believe and he only believed if it got him what he wanted. To him, God didn’t exist because when he wished for his parents to get back together, things only got worse. So to Jack, a true and pure heaven didn’t exist. Only his version did, and in his image of heaven he saw half naked chicks serving him without objections. They were all blonde, too, strangely enough.

“That sounds absolutely-” he wanted to say wicked, or awesome, or cool but if he did she might hurt him for not being considerate so instead, he sucked in his chest and said “awesome!” he couldn’t help it, because if he said terrible as a first time reaction he’d be lying. “But shit because that must have hurt.” He didn’t want to think about it but with a brain like his, he couldn’t help imagine the magnets fighting their way through organs, tearing them apart just to be together. If you were an insane person you’d find it sweet, that they’d do anything to be together, thankfully, Jack wasn’t insane. He was just a guy, so anything gory seemed kind of awesome, mainly because it didn’t involve him. If it did then he wouldn’t be smiling like a goon right now.

During the course of their conversation, Jacks’ legs had tangled their way innocently between her own, bringing her closer to him for a tighter embrace. It was unmanly but he liked just sitting there, hugging; it was comforting. It was better done when the war was going on, because now there was no real reason to comfort her like he was there and then. “My day?” he laughed, because his day couldn’t be considered a day at all. “Boring. Andrew wouldn’t do anything with me because Avery pissed him off and then you came over. I had a good lay-in this morning.” And there, behold the life of a famous, self-proclaimed Banjo God.

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demelz
2008-08-07 01:49 pm UTC (link)

Why was the earth round, and not flat? How could they all just walk around on, what was technically, a ball? And why couldn’t they fly like birds. There are questions that just cannot be answered, but were constantly on her mind, wondering how, when, why, who. There was no one to answer them, and therefore, there wasn’t a God. If there was he wouldn’t have allowed someone like You-Know-Who to roam the planet, he wouldn’t have allowed kids (because that was what they were) like them to participate. He wouldn’t have had Jack being hit with a curse that had actually been meant for her. She’d had nightmares about that for months after, and while he’d been okay, she had still felt like it was all her fault. Stupid boy, always wanting to play the hero.

Broken from her thoughts about the war, she moved her hand and smacked his stomach, although soft. “It was not awesome!” well, the little boy had said it was, just because he didn’t have to go to school, but he was too young to understand he could have been dead. Jack could have been dead if it had been the Avada curse that had been shot at her, too. That thought didn’t make her the least bit happy. Her head buried into his chest, wiggling their joint legs together like little kids that played in a sandbox. “I’m glad you’re my best friend,” random, but true. He was always there when she needed him to be, he was the male version of Avery. “And I’m glad you’re not naked because you needed a wax in my dream,”

“Of course it was boring, you weren’t with me,” her voice was muffled against his chest, eyes half closing. At the mention of Andrew and Avery, though, she was wide awake. “What’s with them, anyway? Avery acted like she was on her period again, even though hers just ended.” Yeah, that wasn’t too much information at all. “You should tell Andrew to stop being such a dick,” Whatever was going on.

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slopen
2008-08-07 02:31 pm UTC (link)

“You have retarded dreams.” It was a statement and it was the truth and it was also something he said on impulse to ignore the topic of cheese. He was glad she was his best mate too, and he wanted to say it back but he knew that if he did he’d be drowning another feeling. He knew, and he had evidence that relationships between best friends just didn’t work very well, so if he said he was glad she was his best friend too, he’d be taking away the possibility of her being anything more. She was his best female mate, the one he went to for entertainment, the one he spoke to about anything. He endured her female rambles and she was stuck with his idiotic and dorky ways. “I don’t like the fact you’re suggesting I was a gorilla in your dream.” To prove her imagination at night time was totally wrong, he lifted his shirt and exposed his toned chest. Hairless. Normally, it would play host to the odd hair here and there, but he and Andrew burned them off.

This was true. His day had been boring up until now. His hands gently rubbed small circles on her arm, out of habit more than anything else. “Yeah, thanks. Periods still don’t make me horny.” And he was now officially turned off Avery again. “And you need to tell Avery to stop being so dramatic.” Jack didn’t know the full story but he knew snippets and he was on Andrews side the entire way, all women were a pain in the arse. Even Dee, but right now she was being fine. “You looking forward to the party tonight?” Jack was and he wasn’t. Wasn’t because it would mean him getting up and out of the flat. But he was because he wanted the booze and the party, he missed their little gatherings.

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demelz
2008-08-07 03:35 pm UTC (link)

“You’re calling yourself retarded,” she informed him plainly, sighs of breathes leaving her open lips as she breathed through her mouth, her nose busy rubbing against his shirt. She waited, waited, and then waited some more to hear whether he was going to say something about her being his best friend too. When he didn’t, she felt strangely disappointed. But him having said nothing was better than hearing something like ‘I don’t like you’. “Oh, smooth like a baby’s bottom,” a grin played on her lips, her nail digging into the skin of his stomach to see if it really was that smooth, fingertip sliding over it. “But I never said to wax your chest.” Her smile widened, but he probably couldn’t see because her head was ducked down, trying her best to remain serious. The thought of Jack having hair there was just too much. It made her want to roll around in fits of laughter, but she was comfortable where she was.

“I thought over time you’d learn how to love the blood,” she told him wistfully, as though she was disappointed that he didn’t. “I mean, if we were dating right,” she paused a little, vaguely wondering how that’d be like and knowing this wasn’t the first time she thought this, before continuing. “And you were horny, and I’d be horny, but I was on my period—would you still not want to bed me?” okay, that sounded weird. “Imagine someone else if you don’t want to think about me and my blood.” He was probably grossed out by now, good job, Demelza! “Yeah, gives us a chance to spend time with James before he goes off to his sheep,” but at the same time she didn’t feel like going; sometimes those four boys could get so caught up in their own world they’d forget about them girls. Avery was her only hope. “You’ll make sure I don’t drink too much, right?”

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slopen
2008-08-07 04:05 pm UTC (link)

The pause she left between her saying ‘if we dated’ and her continuing on was long enough for Jack to realise she was thinking about it. And this wasn’t the first time it crossed his mind either. But now she had mentioned periods again and just elaborated, he was sure he wouldn’t think of her in the same context again. “Ahh, Dee!” he choked, feeling heat rise to his cheeks. Did she have to be so graphic? Did she have to continue the conversation about periods? It was exactly like watching the Sex Education tape with his mum all over again. Only worse because she used herself in the example and he didn’t know if there was a right or wrong answer to that question. “Nung.” He grunted, turning his face to bury inside her blonde hair. It was uncomfortable knowing when a girl was on her period, and knowing at that moment blood was running out of them and into their knickers. It wasn’t like he spoke about wet dreams or discharge or premature ejaculation. “That’d be messy.” His reply was muffled by her hair and he left it at that, no details, no explaining.

“I’ll make sure you don’t get drunk, or naked, or hurt.” He confirmed as though it were a ritual they always went through. It was, really, whenever they went out they always promised they’d look after each other. It was just natural now, since the war and Hogwarts for Jack to want to look after the female, even though he could hardly look after himself. “But if you do end up naked it’ll probably be your own doing. Or Avery’s, you know what she is like.” No matter how much protesting a person did she always wriggled her toes and got her own way. “Anyway, do you have work all week?”

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demelz
2008-08-07 04:28 pm UTC (link)

“I’m sorry,” she was, but couldn’t help the snorts that vibrated against his chest, trying her best not to laugh out loud. Right now she wished she could see his face, and thus she moved from her position, instead climbing on top of him so she was lying on top of him entirely. “Don’t get ideas, mister,” she tried to keep a straight face, but due to the fact the topic of blood gushing vaginas, she just couldn’t help but utter out a laugh again. Her arms folded on his chest, trying to find a comfortable position so she wouldn’t fall off, before laying her head down on her arms. “It would be messy, you know. I wonder if your free willy would be all red and stuff.” Pause, scrunch nose. “Ew!” Great, now she had that image in her head. Like she wasn’t deranged enough already without having Jack’s red penis on the brain.

“Deal,” she wagged her pinky into his direction, wanting to have a pinky promise. He hadn’t failed her before, and she was sure he wouldn’t fail her now. Okay, so he had failed once with the whole not getting her drunk thing, because she had snuck out to get drunk and dance on a bar with Avery in tow, but that had been during their days at Hogwarts. He hadn’t failed her after Hogwarts. “If I end up naked, I’m blaming you.” Yeah, she could see herself now, telling him off with her private parts exposed. “Nope,” she took a moment to rummage through her brain for her schedule, “I have tomorrow off, and Sunday.” Her chin was now resting on top of his chest, looking up at him. “Why? Are you trying to distract me from the blood talk?”

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slopen
2008-08-09 09:02 am UTC (link)

Why was she still talking? Wait, a better question would be why was he letting her talk? He closed his eyes tight and hummed, but it served no use as her words drowned out his voice and he caught wind of ‘free willy’ and ‘red’. This was Demelza, she was meant to be sweet and innocent and not interested in talking about periods and how messy it would be if they had sex during one. “Dee,” he whined aloud, squirming under her. He didn’t mind her being on top of him; he minded her topic of conversation. There was only so much he could say without his mind focusing on other things. “I don’t want to know about blood gushing out of the same place you pee.” He couldn’t help but snort at that. Girls were weird things.

“Nah,” well, actually, he was kind of trying to bring her away from the period talk. “I just wondered if you wanted to do something else.” His shoulders shrugged briefly, trying hard not to disturb her position on his chest. His arms now folded around her waist, to keep her from falling off him. “We could see a film, or something.” There wasn’t much to do around here, and many things meant he’d probably get noticed by fans and if fans noticed him with her – well, she might not be alive the next day. Not only were females weird in the genital department, they were also crazy in the head too. “We haven’t done anything outside of my bedroom in a while.” That sounded wrong but true. They only ever cuddled or talked, or he played her a song and they danced. He didn’t mind doing it, but he wanted to do other things too. “You’ll need to decide what we see, though. Because I don’t know what’s on.”

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demelz
2008-08-10 04:53 pm UTC (link)

“Then I bet you don’t want to know it comes out as--”chunks. Okay, she was going to stop now and not say anything, her lips pursed forward in an attempt to bite her tongue. “But to go back to the original point, you wouldn’t shag me--” best not use herself as an example anymore. “—or someone else if she was on her period and you were horny as heck?” Yeah, she wanted to know. It seemed like that type of thing best friends told each other. But not really. When the topic shifted to doing something else she piped up. “Such as?” He could give her a piggy back ride, that sounded fun about now. Something silly and, well, normal for them, she supposed. It would distract her from the fact she was about to go on her period and would now have mental flashbacks to this moment. “Aw, but I like it in your room,” yeah, that didn’t sound strange at all. Not after the whole blood gushing out of one’s vagina thing.

“It smells all you like,” and now she’d turned into a stalker. Well, she couldn’t help it; after him and Andrew had gotten all famous and stuff they had resided in his bedroom more often than going out somewhere. And now she’d gotten used to it. At the same time, however, she didn’t like the fact he didn’t want to bring her out more often. It’s for your own good, Andrew once told her after she’d questioned him when she didn’t want to ask Jack, because if our fans would know about you, they’d slap you so hard your face would fall off. “Do you promise not to introduce me as your long lost sister this time?” This hadn’t been to a fan, but to some random girl she had caught him chatting with and thought he was getting a little too cozy. “I don’t know what’s on, but no blood or gore, please. I’ve seen enough of that for now. How about a romantic comedy?”

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