Fitz. (![[info]](https://www.insanejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} damagednow) wrote in ![[info]](https://www.insanejournal.com/img/community.gif){kind=small} toboldlyrpg,@ 2017-09-25 10:03:00 |
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| Entry tags: | ! enterprise, - medical bay, leopold fitz | mcu, phil coulson | mcu |
WHO: Phil Coulson and Leo Fitz
WHERE: Medbay
WHEN: 226409.10
WHAT: Fitz arrives and is still reeling from The Framework
RATING: ?
STATUS: Partial Log; In Progress in comments.
It was like an electric shock, waking up. Fitz’s muscles seized, briefly forcing his back to arch as he gasped for air before he collapsed back down on the bio bed. For one brief, shining moment, he had forgotten. He’d forgotten about Ophelia, and the Framework. He’d forgotten what it was like to walk down the halls and not have people smile and wave because they were happy to see you, but turn their eyes to the ground and their faces away because they feared you. He’d forgotten what a rush it was. He’d forgotten the familiar but not at all calming presence of his father at his side, constantly whispering in his ear like far more loyal and cruel Grima Wormtongue. But once that initial shock wore off, all that was left was the pain and the knowledge that at his core, Fitz was a cruel, callous monster who could and would easily disregard human life. That he didn’t deserve the friends he had, didn’t deserve Jemma no matter how he loved her, hungrily, desperately. After the lives he’d taken, his own should be forfeit. Maybe that’s what this was. Maybe this was his penance. Phil paused outside the exam room, pulling up the file. Fitz, Leopold. His heart skipped a beat. It couldn't be. He entered the room with his heart in his chest, not knowing exactly what he'd find. "Welcome to the USS Enterprise. I'm Phil Coulson-" Phil glanced up to see the familiar young man he considered part of his family. "But I'm hoping you already know that." Seeing a familiar face helped. It helped a lot, eased the heart that was pounding in his chest, but it did little to ease the pained, almost tortured, look in his eyes. “Director?” "Fitz," he said, giving Fitz a worried smile as he came over to the bed and put a hand on Fitz's shoulder. "It's okay, Fitz. You're safe. I'm here. May's here. You're okay, Fitz." Fitz sat up on the bed, one hand moving to cover Coulson’s on his shoulder. It was comforting, not like Imaginary Jemma’s had been when he was still in the early stages of his recovery and rehabilitation after having drowned. It was more solid. Warmer. Real, as opposed to a figment of his imagination. That was what he latched on to, with a deep breath as he looked over at the older man. “... Jemma?” "She's not here. Not yet, anyway, but she could show up at any time." No need to tell Fitz she'd been here before. They both knew there was no point in dwelling on the past. He squeezed again before taking Fitz's hand in his. "Some sort of nebula anomaly. You can find out everything you need to know from the science division, but short story is we're in the future, on the USS Enterprise. And all that Star Trek stuff is real." Not having Jemma there was going to be rough. They had so much to talk about, not just to deal with his issues and the things he’d seen and said and done, but about… He almost didn’t know what to call her any more. AIDA? Ophelia? And he didn’t even know what the best way to begin that conversation was. That train of thought was interrupted, though, by the phrase “Star Trek is real”. His brows shot up and Fitz looked a little more like his usual self. “Really? Really real? The isn’t another version of the Framework?” "As far as any of us can tell." But there was no way to prove that. "Not to mention now that you're here we can talk about upgrading the features on my arm again." It was a distraction technique. Even Phil had a hard time thinking of Fitz without SImmons. It would be difficult. Phil knew all too well what it was like not to have your other half around. "Although I should warn you - most of the avengers are here - as well as Howard Stark, so there's plenty of folks for you to chat engineering with." Fitz knew it was a distraction, telling him about the Avengers and other engineers on board and leading with talk of Coulson’s prosthetic arm. He knew Coulson and that he was just giving him a way out of this panic he was stuck in- rightfully, he thought. But his self-flagellation could only go on so long, so Fitz took the hand up and held onto it tight. He could continue to punish himself later, in private. He took a deep breath, trying to steady himself. Having Coulson’s calm presence there helped. “What, uh… What sort of upgrades were you thinking? Because I had a thought about the possibility of expanding your shield so it forms a dome, yeah? For total coverage.” "You know I'm probably going to let you do any upgrades you want, right?" Phil said, raising an eyebrow at Fitz with a bit of a grin. He held on tightly to Leo's hand. He may not have his whole team here, but they were his family and his responsibility, and he wasn't going to let them down. "Well, I thought we could link the interface with the network they're using on this ship for starters… and whatever else your genius brain comes up with." Already the offered distraction was working wonders for Fitz, keeping his brain focused on all the things he could do fort he good of others rather than all the ways he was a horrible human being who no longer deserved to be part of SHIELD, to be part of this team, to be part of life. "Yeah, that's... That's a good idea. Hooking the interface up to the ship's computer. It might be a good idea to, um... To get permission first. And then I'll have to make a few modifications. Maybe, um. incorporate some replicator tech so you never run out of ammunition." There were millions of options so that was just the tip of the iceberg. |