InsaneJournal

It was nothing personal against Jadzia, but Mary was not terribly thrilled to have a roommate. At least she only had to share the common areas and still had a bedroom to herself where she could retreat if she wanted some privacy. Mary was used to a much bigger space though, and used to it being all hers. Sharing a space was yet another thing that she had to become accustomed to in this time and place.

Fortunately, Jadzia seemed relatively easygoing and likeable. It was odd that she was from the future, that she even knew some of the people on board, including the captain. Was that odd for him, she wondered? Knowing that there was a person on the ship who knew your fate? Personally, Mary wasn’t sure that she would want to know something like that.

Mary was reading a book, an honest to goodness paper one, in the common area when the door to the dormitory slid open and Jadzia returned from wherever she had been. Mary looked up from her book and smiled. “Good afternoon.” The two of them had met and exchanged pleasantries, but so far hadn’t had a long extended conversation yet.

---

Until she'd married Worf, Jadzia hadn't had a roommate since she'd been an Ensign. So it wasn't a new experience for her, just one she wasn't used to. She didn't know what kind of person Mary was just yet, but if Jadzia was anything when it came to people, it was stubborn.

Mary was friendly at least, but she seemed distant. She supposed it had to be the era Mary was from, and Jadzia had plans to close the gap.

"Good afternoon." She smiled, taking her hair out of the ponytail. While she could have gone with pants, she'd opted for the skirt with stockings, for that authentic 23rd century feel. "Mine was pretty hectic, you wouldn't believe how badly someone takes it when you point out that their scientific theory gets invalidated in thirty years. How was yours?"

---

Ladies wearing skirts was the norm for Mary. In fact, the only time she ever wore pants was when she was riding her horse, an activity that she did not think she would be engaging in very much in space.
She marked her place in her book and closed it. “I can imagine that might be frustrating for someone if they worked particularly hard on it,” she replied. “My day was… just fine.” Rather boring. Mary felt bored on the ship a lot of the time because she didn’t quite understand all of the goings on. Add to that a certain fear factor of the unknown and it made her stick to a routine in order to stay safe. Perhaps someday she would get used to all of this. It must be easier for someone like Jadzia.

---

"Just fine?" Jadzia sank onto a chair and pulled her boots off. She massaged her foot, and groaned, before leaning back in the chair. "I can't imagine there's all that much you're used to here."

She might have a solution, and it would only be stretching the rules a little bit, but it was quickly becoming clear to Jadzia that the rulebook needed to be thrown out. But the, Jadzia Dax and rule books didn't always get along. "But I might have an idea, if I can make it work with the technology on your ship. It'll help you and some of the others feel a little more at home, if it works. What do you miss most about where you're from? Besides the people."

---

“I’m not,” Mary confirmed. It was so far removed from everything that she had ever known, in more ways than one. Not only was the environment harsh, but she was used to the routines of her home - dressing for dinner with her family every night, breakfast in bed every morning. She had none of that here and the period of adjustment would take some time.

She had to think for a moment about Jadzia’s question, though it wasn’t for very long. “Being outside,” she answered. “The grass, the air. I lived in a beautiful place and I loved being able to walk around our gardens and lawns.” Here she felt like she was stuck in a can.

---

"That's always the hardest part, I think. I'm used to it now. Home was a space station for me called Deep Space Nine, and even before that I spent a lot of time on ships. But the first time I ever left Trill..." Jadzia shook her head. "It was a hell of an adjustment. But that story might require a little explaining about my species."

It was a good thing Jadzia liked to talk, especially when it involved educating someone about just about anything. She took a particular joy in it.

---

Mary raised her eyebrows slightly. “Your species?” She had never really doubted that Jadzia was human, though there was something a bit off about her appearance. Peggy had told her that there was a wide variety of people both on the ship and in the universe, ones who looked human but were not.

---

"I'm what's called a Trill. An alien. Though I look pretty human, I'm not. And it's not just the spots." She trailed a hand down the side of her face. She tried to simplify the explanation, because she knew it was a lot to take in.

"My species has a symbiotic relationship with another species native to our planet. It gets implanted in some of us, and we share memories and experiences. I have the memories of seven previous lives, going back hundreds of years. I've been a husband and a wife, mother and father, and many other things besides. It’s in the ship’s database, as we exist in this time too. One of my past lives even met the ship’s doctor, but I don’t know yet if he remembers or if that was a… different version of him."

---

Mary nodded. She had noticed the spots, of course. They, like the ears on a Vulcan, were the telltale sign that a person was not quite human. She would have to remember that. What Jadzia described next though was one of the oddest things Mary had ever heard in her life, and she was sure that her face reflected her surprise.

“You have memories of the past lives of seven different people?” How did a person manage with that many memories?

---

"Sounds really strange, doesn't it." Jadzia had met a few of the other aliens on board, some of which were a lot weirder than she was, and one of which of a species she'd never met in person before.

"It's less confusing than it sounds. Oh, I pick up habits. I often have my hands clasped behind my back and I got that from my first host. My love of Klingons from the most recent host before me. Among other habits and hobbies. When Jadzia was joined to Dax, we both changed. I believe it was for the better."

She realized she sounded rather blase about the whole thing, so tried to look at it from Mary’s perspective. “The universe is a vast and strange place, filled with wonders beyond imagining. For example, there are beings who don’t exist in linear time. They exist across all time at once and have a hard time understanding… time. I had the pleasure of being one of the first Starfleet officers to make contact with them. And you haven’t seen anything until you’ve seen a nebula up close.”

---

Indeed, Mary’s brow was furrowed as she looked at her. Jadzia had said a lot of things, many of which Mary didn’t quite understand. Especially how a person could exist across all time.

“I am from a very long time ago. We had barely mastered flight above the ground in my day. Now I am on a ship floating thousands of miles away from Earth. It is… overwhelming.” It still was. She didn’t know when it would get any easier. “Everyone has been kind, but… I still feel quite lost.”

---

“What year are you from?” Jadzia asked. She’d need to know, if she could get permission for what she was realizing she wanted to do. A way for people like Mary to visit home. Sort of.

“It’s easy to get lost out here, even when you belong out here.” Jadzia gave her a friendly smile. “Describe a typical day.”

---

“1924,” she replied. “A typical day for me?” The question kind of surprised her, as she wasn’t sure if she had ever been asked. “Well, I would start with breakfast in bed, usually with the newspaper as well. My maid would help me get up and get dressed. Usually in the morning I would go out and check on the farms on our estate to check that everything was running smoothly. If I had any errands to do in town, I would usually do that in the morning too. Then I would have luncheon back home. In the afternoon I would visit with people for tea, or spend some time with my son, or work on paperwork for the estate. My maid would help me dress for dinner, as that was always formal. My family would eat and then we would usually settle in the library or one of the sitting rooms for a while. Then it would be time for bed. Sometimes I liked to read at night before I slept.”

That was what it was like to be an upper class woman in her time. Very privileged, but not terribly exciting.

---

1924, England, on an estate. Jadzia could work with that. She listened intently. It was a life of luxury, but Jadzia didn't judge her for it. It didn't sound all that exciting and Jadzia would probably feel stifled and very quickly. "How old is your son?"

That may or may not be a safe subject, but one that Jadzia knew needed to be broached. Best to get it out of the way.

---

“He is three.” Thinking of him made Mary both happy and sad. She had pictures, though they weren't enough. “At least he has my parents and the rest of my family to take care of him. I would rather him be there than here.”

She had fought her whole life to preserve the estate for him, to make sure that her son would be the heir. Mary supposed that at least she had the good fortune to not be sent over 200 years in the future before she had managed to make sure that Downton would remain with their family.

---

"Three, that's both a wonderful age, and a terrible one. I've noticed that no matter the species, that's always an interesting time. They're coming out of the toddler phase and really starting to show their minds and personalities working."

Jadzia thought of her own children. Well, those of previous hosts. She'd wanted one of her own with Worf too. "I was going to have one. My husband is...was... will be, I suppose, a Klingon. Fierce, honorable. Vastly misunderstood in this time period. We thought we couldn't have a child together, but Julian assured me he could make it work. And then I was attacked, and they probably think I'm dead."

Was it possible to mourn someone who wasn't even born yet? She didn't know if she'd ever be able to return, or if she tried, she really would die.

---

“Yes,” Mary said with a smile. “He can walk and speak now and some of the things he says are quite funny.” He still reminded her so much of her deceased husband. It had taken her a long time to get over that, to be able to look at him without thinking of Matthew and how much his death had hurt her.

Mary nodded. She wasn’t familiar with all of the different alien species of this time and expected that it might take her a while to do so. “I’m sorry. I have heard that others faced some sort of tragedy as well before they were brought here.”

---

The things children said could be very funny. Sometimes poignant, too. "Your son sounds wonderful. I'm sure you'll get to see him again. It would be a shame to miss the little hellion stage."

Jadzia gave a little shrug. "I've died before. I'll die again. I suppose I have a different viewpoint of it at least for myself. It's a little harder when it's someone else. A friend, or a lover. That always hurts a lot more than my own mortality. But it can get complicated."

She smiled, sounding a little sad. "Among the Trill, we try to avoid contact with the spouses of previous hosts. It's believed rekindling a relationship is bad. I don't believe so myself, but it is what it is. No matter how strong the emotions or attraction might be."

---

“I hope so,” Mary said quietly. She didn’t want George here, so hopefully they would be able to find a way for her to get back home.

Jadzia’s situation was so odd. She tried to put herself in her position, but she found it difficult to. Imagine having the feelings and memories of seven different people before you? “How are you able to keep all of those memories sorted? Sometimes I can hardly keep my own sorted.”

---

“We go through rigorous training and testing,” Jadzia explained. “Psych evaluations, the full works. Not every Trill can be joined. Some just don’t make the cut. There aren’t enough Symbionts, for one thing. But it’s no different than pulling any other memory. There’s just a lot more to sort from, and each host leaves a sort of… trail behind. I can always tell it’s a Curzon memory by the way the memory feels.”

---

It was so hard for Mary to relate to that, but she found that she did like Jadzia. She seemed kind and intelligent. That worked well for her. Mary could get along with that. “You were married back home?” Mary asked. “I was as well, though my husband died several years ago, right after George was born.”

---

"I'm sorry for your loss. I know that can't have been easy. Especially so soon after George was born." She crossed her legs, leaning back. "Yes, I was. His name is Worf. A Klingon. Very honorable. Kind, as far as Klingons go. But get him in a fight and he's a true warrior. He was Starfleet's first Klingon officer. Served aboard..."

Jadzia looked around, but it wasn't like anyone was there to listen. "Another Enterprise, before coming to my station after his ship was destroyed. It's a distinguished name. A good ship for someone like Worf. I think he learned more about himself and his culture aboard the Enterprise-D and Deep Space Nine than he ever did in his life leading up to those points."

They learned about Kirk’s Enterprise at the Academy, and also the B and C. Jadzia was certain the D would be added as well.

---

“So this ship has had several iterations?” Mary asked. There was a brief pause before her next question. “Captain Kirk, is he well-regarded in your time?” Imagine someone from your future showing up and telling you what would happen to you? Mary would be curious to know, but also a bit scared.

---

“Yes. Different classes. This one and her predecessor are Constitution-Class. Her successor is Excelsior-Class, then Ambassador, Galaxy, and Sovereign. There’s a long lineage of ships with that name, dating back to the 1700s. It’s required reading at Starfleet Academy. I once visited the latest Enterprise with Worf, shortly after she was commissioned, and I’ve been on several of the other classes, but I never served aboard an Enterprise until now.” An Enterprise rarely made it to mothballs. Most had been lost and usually for the greater good.

Mary seemed very curious about Kirk. Jadzia couldn’t blame her. When she’d seen him during the Orb of Time incident, in the flesh, she’d gotten a little fangirly. “He’s well-regarded. A hero. Considered a bit of a maverick, but that’s not always a bad thing.”

---

Mary didn’t remember any ships named Enterprise in her time, but she wasn’t exactly up on the names of ships either.

She was curious about him, ever since meeting him officially at the lounge. This ship was more important than she realized, and to be captain of it was a feat for someone so young. “He and his crew have been very welcoming to us.” Mary paused for a moment before making her next statement. “I am amazed at how young he is to have such an important position.”

---

“He’s younger even than where I’m from,” Jadzia said. While a lot of the circumstances surrounding this Kirk’s promotion were Starfleet eyes only, there was enough she could still talk about. “In my timeline, he was the youngest Starfleet captain, at 32. He took command of the Enterprise in 2265 to start an historic five-year mission. That’s a full year from now. Here, something happened that altered the course of history, and he was given the promotion seven years early. I don’t have the full details but I do know he took command of the ship in an emergency and proved himself by saving Earth. You might want to ask him yourself for the details.”

Jadzia grinned. “While you’re at it, ask about the Kobayashi Maru test.” That at least remained mostly the same.

---

“It sounds like quite a feat,” Mary said, slightly shocked by it all. Admittedly, it was also impressive. Kirk was, by all accounts, a remarkable man. To be under his protection made her feel a bit better about being in this position. She furrowed her brow. “The what?”

---

"It's a test, at the Academy." Jadzia decided then and there that she was going to do one of her favorite things. Hook Mary up with someone. That someone being the Legendary Captain Kirk.

"Basically, it's a no win scenario designed to test command officers and see their reactions to a situation they can't beat. Jim Kirk found a way to beat it."

---

Mary’s eyes widened a bit. “That is… very impressive. I wonder how he did it.”

She obviously wasn’t blind and had noticed that the captain was a good-looking man. His appeal wasn’t only physical either. He carried himself in a way that implied authority and importance. Mary was the type of woman who was attracted to such a thing.

---

“Only one way to find out. Ask him! He’s a good man. Worth getting to know.” She winked at Mary. “And I mean that in every way imaginable.”

---

Mary furrowed her brow and gave a slightly nervous laugh. She was surprised at what Jadzia was suggesting. “I suppose he's handsome, if that's what you mean.” She wasn't quite sure if she felt that way towards the captain, as she did not know him very well yet. He did intrigue her though.

---

“That he is.” Jadzia always admired attractive people, gender and species not really mattering. Even after marrying Worf she still looked. Strayed, no. But looked, yes. “I’ve met many people. Jim Kirk is among the more attractive. But then his is a legendary handsomeness.”

---

“You seem quite taken with him,” Mary said. As if she wasn't. “I admit that he is… an impressive man.” But he was from 300 years in her future. Why would he be interested in someone so old-fashioned? “But also quite busy, I'm sure,” she continued, as if closing the matter by mentioning that. Mary had recently reopened her heart to the idea of love, but finding it here seemed so unlikely to her.

---

“What can I say, in a lot of ways he’s the opposite of Worf.” Jadzia shrugged, a twinkle in her eyes as she leaned forward and smiled at Mary. If this Jim Kirk was anything at all like the one she’d read about, Mary might have a way in. “Even the Captain of a starship has downtime. I suggest bringing up literature.”

---

Mary gave her a skeptical look. He didn’t look like a man who was fond of literature, but then she supposed that looks could be deceiving.

“Are you trying to set us up for courting?” she asked. There was a little smile on her face. That was sweet, even if Mary doubted that there would be interest on his part.

---

Jadzia wouldn’t exactly call it courting, though it was close enough. She just hoped Mary loosened up enough to accept modern customs. If she could get Worf to loosen up, she could do anything. “You’ve found me out. I’m trying to set you up.”

---

She laughed a little. “Do you honestly think that he and I would be well-suited?”

There were so many differences between them, time being only one of them. He was much less formal than the men she was used to. And who even knew if he wanted or was interested in courting at all?

---

“I already told you,” Jadzia smiled. “Only one way to find out!”