Jasper Sitwell (agentsitwell) wrote in timeloopic, @ 2019-05-05 22:22:00 |
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In fact, though everything he was about to say was a lie, Jasper was a practiced liar for as long as he could remember. It was the way of life for a biracial, closeted kid attending forging new paths in computer crime or attending a school for young spies. The trick was that while the story was false, the anger had to come from somewhere. What he'd been up to his neck in for years was more invasive than cancer.
"I'm Bob. Stage III Cholangiocarcinoma."
"I'm originally from North Carolina, but work's brought me up here since the Disappearance. I guess things are hard up enough that even guys like us are needed back at work..."
"That's--new." He offered as a bitter aside.
He'd watched his mom through the end of her breast cancer in his 30s, but a career in HYDRA cancelled the empathy to properly face treatment with anything more than fatalism and gall. But that didn't mean he couldn't mimic it. "A few months back, I found out it had metastasized to my spine. They cut one out, two more grew back in its place, I guess." Subtle. "That was the same day everyone vanished." "I'd spent that whole morning asking 'Why me? Why this?' the primary cancer was hell enough. I'd probably already spent the whole two years before asking that--and then it happened and... I spent the next two weeks asking 'why not me.' You know. We have to face mortality. We get used to thinking of a world without us in it. Almost find it peaceful, like it could end all this bullshit that threatens to choke us. It's hard to find a purpose, or really the will to even look for one when you turn around and find everything you ever worked for is just... dust." Jasper let out a sigh and sat back in his chair. He let his hand slide over the silver streaked dark hair he'd been letting grow on his head. He hated hair, but it was a good indicator of recovery. And the gesture was the best way to reveal the carefully applied tattoo on his wrist. "But it's been good getting back to work. I work in biotech--sort of. It's real cutting edge stuff--I probably shouldn't even be talking about it. But... it keeps me occupied and going forward. I've been feeling stronger. I've got what passes for hair which I'll take." "Sometimes I almost feel like I'm turning a corner. Is that cliche?" He let someone else build off that question. Jasper's part was more or less done. He looked across the circle, letting his eyes linger on his mark until they met. He kept them locked and held his arm up in front of him, sliding the sleeve over the tattoo.