theodore is nott here to comfort you (cleverloner) wrote in thispurgatory, @ 2011-05-16 18:02:00 |
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Susan smiled politely at everyone as she passed by the different compartments. Some of the students she ran into glanced at her badge, their conversations trailing off in her presence, and again she was reminded of the forced distance brought by her position at Hogwarts. While she had always been somewhat shy, there was a difference between avoiding conversation and being avoided or even feared, and Susan didn’t much like the idea of being seen as a terrible person, even with more and more people joining the Inquisitorial Squad.
Squaring her shoulders, Susan moved on. She’d left Ernie and Hannah a few minutes ago with the message that she was going to find the loo, although that was more of an excuse to get out and stretch her legs, and hopefully catch one more glimpse of Theodore before they arrived in London. It was a silly notion, one she would have rolled her eyes at before, but she was unable to help herself. Except his familiar mop of dark hair was no where to be seen, and Susan was beginning to wonder if this ridiculous search was really worth the risk of running into Parkinson, or, Merlin forbid, Blaise Zabini.
Theodore had taken the first shift patrolling the corridors of the train. Dealing with youngsters wasn’t something he enjoyed, but he was hardly going to brush aside the suggestion that he set the tone for the trip. Although he’d had already known about the Death Eaters at Hogwarts, he wouldn’t be surprised if some idiot (Gryffindor, likely) decided to be a hero. Besides, with the way the last trip home had turned out, bracing for another invasion wasn’t a far off concept. Frankly, he hoped that any other students marked for abduction would be taken at a different time - during the vacation, in fact. He wasn’t one to enjoy dealing with the aftermath such bold actions left.
By the time Emily had come to take his place, nothing out of the ordinary had happened - a fact he was grateful for. He all but ran away from the prefect’s compartment, finding himself an empty one near the very end of the train. It had briefly crossed his mind to stop in when he’d seen Draco, Gregory, and Vincent together a few rows up, but realising he had very little to say to them (as usual), he’d gone on past, intent on reading for the remainder of the trip. It occurred to him that Susan was somewhere on board as well, but he couldn’t bring himself to attempt searching for her. In all likelihood she was engaged in good book anyway.
He wasn’t sure how long he’d been engrossed in his history book before he heard the door slide open. Theodore was accustomed to random people assuming his solo occupancy meant the rest of the compartment was open for guests, so he didn’t bother to glance up. Whoever it was was very likely not worth the effort of being annoyed. However it only took a few moments for the silence to arouse his curiosity. Lifting his eyes over the pages of his old tome, he was surprised to see the only person whose presence was welcome: Susan.
“Ms Bones,” he said as he carefully marked his page, setting his book aside. “What warrants this... surprise?”
Deciding to give up on her search and make good of the excuse she had given to her friends, Susan moved towards the back of the train. She couldn’t keep herself from glancing into the compartments that she passed, regardless, and she wondered whether the younger students were all excited to go home, and how aware they were of what was passing outside the castle walls. She’d instructed her own sister to keep quiet, but Rae had never been very good at following instructions, and Susan worried daily that she would somehow get herself into trouble. Considering what she, herself, was doing, it hadn’t escaped her notice that it made her something of a hypocrite, but she felt that she was a lot better at assessing the risks.
Both her thoughts and feet immediately came to a stop when she spotted Theodore, alone in a compartment, and after a moment’s hesitation she slid open the door. He was engrossed in a book, of course, and a smile tugged at Susan’s lips at the look of concentration on his face, which she absolutely did not find adorable, only she did. She only became aware of her accidental rudeness when Theodore looked up, and she realised that she’d been staring instead of making her presence known.
Colouring slightly, Susan glanced behind her into the corridor to make sure that there was no one around. When she turned back, the smile she aimed at him was soft, shy, and one she was normally careful to stray away from in public, because she and Theodore weren’t allowed to be anything but amicably polite. “I just... wanted to see you.” It should be alarming how attached she’d become, but instead all she wanted to do was cling to this bit of fragile happiness.
It was hard to deny that Susan looked cute standing there, smiling at him. He was certainly glad she wanted to see him, even if he wasn’t convinced of the wisdom of doing so here on the train. Nowhere on the Hogwarts Express could be considered remotely private, which made Theodore somewhat nervous about her presence. A few moments might not be held under suspicion - they did have a friendly, if professional, public acquaintanceship - but that didn’t make him any less paranoid. Some people were perceptive.
“Has the ride been pleasant so far?” he asked, trying to keep their interactions from swaying over into more ‘familiar’ territory. Despite that, he couldn’t help but smile in return. He would have liked it if she could have sat down next to him, but he refrained from inviting her to do so. “I’m rather glad to see it’s been uneventful,” he added, thoughts drifting to Christmas when the train had been invaded by a gaggle of Death Eaters.
“It’s been acceptable,” Susan said, absent-mindedly running a hand through her hair. She didn’t think Theodore would be very interested in hearing about Ernie and Hannah’s latest discussion, and to be honest she had been tuning her cousin out for the last half hour of her stay in their compartment. “It seems like the ride home keeps getting longer.” Her smile was a bit wry this time, tense as she remembered the Death Eater invasion from last time. It was difficult not to worry about it happening again.
Shifting uncomfortably - it was hard to remain standing here when she really wanted to close the door and snuggle up against Theodore’s side for the remainder of the trip - she noticed his eyes flickering down to her legs, causing her cheeks to burn brighter. “I, erm,” she tried, not sure what she was going to say but trying to break the tension in the room. The smart thing would be to walk away, but she couldn’t, not yet. “What are you reading?” she finished lamely, taking a few steps closer to him.
“Longer,” he repeated, only a hint of curiosity in his tone. He wasn’t sure whether she thought that was a good or bad thing. Generally he was content to be at home, as the manor library was a favorite place of his, however this year he certainly saw prolonging in a favorable light. Theodore was rather anxious about what might happen this holiday, after having already been subjected to the unpleasantness of Malfoy Manor over Christmas break. Of course, that wasn’t something he could share with Susan, much as he would have liked to.
It was difficult not to notice her legs from his seated position. As she had so graciously pointed out before, they were quite nice to look at. Generally he had better self-control than to be so blatant about physical interests, but he realised only too late that he had begun looking at her quite inappropriately. At the sight of her reddened face, his own cheeks colored as he hastily stared at the cover of his book.
“It’s- a biography. Well, sort of. I mean. It’s mostly history. Centaur uprising. Just, I’m currently on the section about the tribe leaders. Which is actually rather extensive, for a book that wasn’t intended to be purely biographical,” he said, starting off with a distracted voice that eventually reached full confidence by the end. He found he was still staring at the book though, because looking at Susan would be too humiliating after she’d caught him looking at her. “Have you read it?”
“Longer to wonder whether it’ll remain undisturbed,” Susan admitted, chewing on her bottom lip a bit nervously. No one but Ernie knew quite how affected she had been by Luna’s kidnapping, and how she had been sure for just a moment that they’d been after her. It was hard to explain the kind of fear that came with her last name, irrational as it was, and the irony of her and Theodore’s involvement had certainly not escaped her notice.
Theodore was rambling, and Susan had to bite back on a smile. History of Magic wasn’t generally in her line of interests, though over the years it had been impossible not to get drawn in by his enthusiasm whenever he spoke of it. It made him seem like a different person somehow, even now when he was clearly using the subject to hide his embarrassment. Not that she’d actually minded his looking. It was flattering in a way that was rather new to her, and made her feel oddly warm.
“Can’t say I have,” she said in a soft voice that made it clear she wasn’t upset with him. “Maybe I should put it on my reading list.” By which she really meant that perhaps he could read to her later, but she wasn’t going to risk saying that out loud just now.
His brow furrowed at that. Even though he’d been having thoughts along the same lines, it didn’t mean he felt in any position to talk about it. After all, it was a well known fact that his father was one of them. He hadn’t been near the part of the train that had been broken into during their last trip, so he wasn’t sure whether or not the man had taken part in the abduction, but it didn’t really matter whether or not he did. Theodore was mildly surprised they had not sent anyone after the blood traitors yet, but he supposed most of them had kept quiet, more or less. There were a few people he would not have minded being taken away for lock up in the Malfoy dungeons though, a thought for which he was unapologetic.
Standing up, he moved past Susan, briefly brushing against her in the tiny compartment space, and moved to lean against the window. “It’d be less of an inconvenience if further abductions took place outside of the train,” he said with a shrug. If they were going to happen, they might as well happen in a place that wouldn’t disrupt him, personally. “But the sky looks clear. At least for now.” If anything, Death Eaters were not known for doing anything without credit. With no dark mark looming above them, he had to assume the trip was continuing as normal for the time being.
Turning to look at her, he smiled slightly, shaking his head. “It’s a shame you haven’t. I wouldn’t have minded a spirited debate over the pros and cons of the various angles of the war. Naturally, the ending is non-disputable,” - wizards winning, with the centaurs going off into self-isolation - “but I don’t think it’s as straightforward as some tend to believe.” After a pause, he bit his lip, then added, “I’m certain it could find its way to your list in some fashion.”
“I’d rather they not happen at all,” Susan said, both her voice and posture tense at the subject. She was aware that they lived in different worlds, but to her the threat was very much real, even if that likely hadn’t occurred to Theodore. She moved to stand next to him by the window, silent as she looked up at the sky. The weather could change without warning, something that applied to more than one aspect of life, and she wondered if she would be able to see the clouds coming, and whether there would be time to run for cover.
Forcing herself to turn away from that line of thought, Susan glanced at him, her smile less open than it had been before. “I suppose I should go soon.” She didn’t move from her position, instead allowing her hand to lightly brush past his. In a few hours they would be home, and even with the promise of seeing him before their return their Hogwarts, her stomach still felt uneasy at the thought. Last time, when they had returned after Christmas, things had been different, which caused her to worry more than before about what went on during these reunions with his father.
At her comment, he wondered if she was worried about being a victim of a next abduction. Theodore was well aware of her family history. Even if she wasn’t a pureblood, her family had been for a very long time. Everyone knew the sort of political pull the Bones family had enjoyed for generations... and everyone also knew they were now blood traitors in almost every branch.”You’re not your aunt,” he pointed out after some time had passed. Though only the most recent member of her family to pass, the contrast between them was worth mentioning. Amelia Bones certainly hadn’t been known for her prudence in certain matters at the ministry. He wondered briefly how much of his statement he thought was true, and how much of it he merely wanted to be true. Theodore knew very well that she didn’t exactly agree with anything going on, despite her show of solidarity at Hogwarts. Separating her from her family was practically impossible and a large part of the reason he didn’t think it would be safe for them to conduct their relationship openly.
“You should,” he agreed, though he enjoyed the comfort her closeness offered. Although they were not touching, he felt like standing next to the window with her was in some ways very intimate. Turning his body fully towards her, he looked at her. He wanted to kiss her but refrained, content to reach up and brush a strand of hair away from her eyes. Theodore’s fingers lingered on the silkiness of her cheek, wishing they were somewhere else, away from any potential interruptions.
Emily's train rounds had been fairly easy, thankfully. Like many others on the train, she'd been worried someone else would be abducted like Luna Lovegood and she wasn't sure she was ready to deal with Death Eaters searching for a student, nor did she believe she'd turn someone over to them if she was asked. Luckily, it hadn't come to that; the only thing she'd had to worry about so far was confiscating a few fireworks--how had these little second years gotten fireworks?--after keeping them from getting set off down the corridor in the first place.
She'd managed fine, of course, but wanted to report the incident to Theodore, knowing it would probably get back to him anyway. She'd glanced in several of the cars she'd walked by without much success but eventually recognized his silhouette through the window. She knocked gently on the door as she opened it and stuck her head in. "I wanted to--oh," she caught herself, noticing Susan Bones in the room as well. "I--hello."
The subject of her aunt brought forth a lot of questions that Susan was unable to address, and so she simply nodded quietly. It was frustrating not being able to tell Theodore what exactly was going on with her family, and where she stood in this war, but she knew that it would put him in an impossible position and that she very likely would not like the outcome. She looked at him instead, a half-smile on her face and a silent apology hidden somewhere in her eyes.
Where one moment she was leaning into his caress, vaguely considering throwing caution in the wind and kissing him regardless of their position, the soft sound of the door sliding open caused her to tense. Taking a quick step backwards, Susan’s eyes drifted over to the door, her cheeks blazing with heat, and she wasn’t sure whether to be relieved or alarmed to find that Emily Hopkins had been the one to interrupt them. She didn’t know the other girl, not really, and while there hadn’t been a lot for her to see, the scene had been decidedly... intimate.
“I should go,” she said hastily, finding herself unable to look at Theodore now, for surely it would give everything away if they hadn’t already. The colour still high on her cheeks prevented her from looking quite as poised as intended while she moved past Emily and out into the corridor. “Ms Hopkins.” She gave the girl a polite nod before setting off back in the direction of her own compartment, her heartbeat sounding entirely too loud to her ears.
Theodore wasn’t easily startled, nor was he used to feeling exposed - but those were the exact feelings he had right then. He didn’t do much more than nod at Susan when she proclaimed she was leaving and while his eyes followed her out the door, he didn’t move a step away from his spot by the window. Once Susan had gone, he glanced over at Emily, not sure he quite trusted himself to say anything. His first instinct was tell her that anything she thought she saw, she hadn’t but that was, itself, practically an admission of guilt.
“Emily,” he said at last, deciding for the time being that he wouldn’t address the last few seconds, regardless of how awkward and paranoid he now felt. “Was there something you wanted?” he asked. He could feel a slight burn in his cheeks, but aside from the redness there, he thought was doing quite well not to react to her obviously unwanted intrusion.
The awkwardness in the room was hard to ignore. Emily hadn't really caught Theodore and Susan at anything, she realized, but it certainly felt like she had. It rather blew her away; she'd had no idea there was something even to catch, let alone that it would be between Theodore Nott and Susan Bones. She really didn't know how to proceed but, for the moment at least, she followed Nott's lead. "I, um," she paused, trying to remember exactly why she'd come in. "Right. I've just--there were a couple of second years trying to set off fireworks in the corridor. I took care of it, obviously. I'm also going to speak to their parents at the station. I just wanted to let you know."
Second years and fireworks. Well that certainly wasn’t the worse thing that could have happened. Though he could see why Emily had felt the need to bring it up to him. With the way things were going, every little thing was being scrutinized. It was probably best she’d been the one to apprehend them, as there were several prefects who might have reacted differently. Of course, he wasn’t too concerned with that at the moment, and only nodded his head in agreement.
“Alright, I’m certain they will appreciate your concern,” he said. “I would appreciate your discretion,” he added, not at all talking about the matter she’d brought to his attention. He wasn’t sure what she’d seen, if anything, but erring on the side of caution was nothing if not a good idea. He was at least assured that there was little she could do with anything she thought she might have seen, but at least determining her level of perception could be useful.
So there had been something to see, Emily realized. She nodded her head quickly, wondering for a moment if there was even anything she could do with the information she'd just come upon. Of course, nothing really came to mind and even if it did, she wasn't really the type to use secrets against someone. Still, it certainly gave her a new perspective on Theodore Nott, and on Susan Bones for that matter. If nothing else, it was definitely interesting. She offered a small smile and, in a tone offering the lightest of jokes, asked "Discretion about what?" as if to say everything was already forgotten and there was nothing to talk about.
Theodore merely raised an eyebrow at that, not sure what to make of it. Of course, he had no intention of elaborating or continuing that line of conversation. “I believe you had rounds to finish? Or another compartment to seat yourself in?” he said. Although he already felt as though he’d given her some sort of unintended upper hand, he wasn’t about to sacrifice his pride or dignity by fleeing from his own compartment too.
Emily had to stop herself from smiling even wider at the brush-off she was clearly getting from Theodore. She had no idea why it amused her, but it had. Though he was still entirely controlled, it seemed that she had probably just seen Theodore Nott as close to flustered as she was likely ever to again. "You're right. I just wanted to report. Here's hoping the rest of the train ride is... uneventful." With that, she left the compartment.