WHO: Cecilia and Declan WHEN: New Year’s Eve WHERE: Goyle's party and then a nearby hotel WHAT: Cece’s New Year’s Eve with Declan does not go quite according to plan Rating: R Complete
She was nervous. Even knowing she was wearing lingerie designed to make a bloke’s eyes pop underneath her party dress and she was looking fabulous overall didn’t stop Cece’s hands from shaking slightly. Up until now, she’d been her usual bubbly self at Greg’s party, laughing and dancing as if it was just another New Year’s Eve and she wasn’t about to do something life changing. Now the clock had struck the time she and Declan had agreed on to leave and she was wishing it could go backwards.
Checking her reflection in the bathroom mirror, Cece was glad she didn’t look as scared as she felt. Her mother had trained her well on how to conceal her feelings when necessary and that training was coming in now. “You’re being foolish,” she murmured to her reflection. “You want this, you suggested it, and you love him. This is all just silly nerves and perfectly normal,” she pushed aside her doubts with a firm nod and then left the bathroom to find Declan.
Declan looked around, trying not to show the anxiety he was feeling, and which he just couldn’t understand. So he was finally losing his virginity, and it was going to happen with a girl he positively adored. He should be excited, right? So why did he feel like he was preparing his own funeral?
Maybe it was the Divination student in him, he pondered, not for the first time. Ever since Parvati did his reading, he had become obsessed with the idea that something bad was going to happen. Maybe he’d fail to live up to Cece’s expectations. Maybe he’d be too forward, to fast, too strong. Maybe he wouldn’t be forward, fast or strong enough.
Sighing, he served himself with another drink (something soft and non-alcoholic - he was dying for something stronger but he knew it was better to keep his wits) while waiting for Cece’s return. He was being foolish, he told himself. Those nerves were going to be the cause of it all if he did screw up.
While sipping his drink, he tried to think of something that would calm his nerves - and the first thing that came to his mind was Molly’s voice in that card she gave him for Christmas. The Ravenclaw was the last person he wanted to think about at this point, but that song seemed to be having the desired effect so he didn’t struggle against it like he did in other occasions where he wanted to focus on Cece and Cece alone. The combination of Molly’s voice, made even sweeter by the emotion that she clearly had put in her rendition, the lyrics and the sentiment of such a gift, had a soothing effect on Declan’s spirits - probably even more than a full bottle of Firewhisky but without the numbness.
By the time Cece had returned, he was still nervous, but the feeling of dread had been replaced by the more pleasant sensation of butterflies in his stomach, and it was with a sincere and affectionate smile that he greeted her.
“Ready?” he asked.
“As I’ll ever be,” Cece smiled back at him, the affectionate smile on his face reassuring her that she was doing the right thing. All her nervousness was just because they were taking a big step, but in the end it would make their relationship more solid. She took his hand and squeezed it gently. “I love you,” she murmured, blushing faintly and veiling her eyes with her lashes, feeling shy all of a sudden.
“Let’s go,” there was a decisive note in her voice. She was going to do this, with the boy she loved, and she wasn’t going to hold back.
It was strange seeing Cece blushing like this. She was never the shy type, so it was almost like looking at a completely different person. However, for Declan, such a reaction had a reassuring effect, as it showed that she was just as nervous as he was.
He kissed the hand she had offered him, and the two of them prepared to leave.
As they had to say farewell to their hosts, leaving took a little longer, but the normal actions of polite departure were reassuring. It was only when they got to their destination that Cece felt nervous again. What did she do now? She’d been reading a lot of magazines and books (secretly of course), but all the advice seemed to have vanished from her head.
Removing her cloak, she set it aside and turned to Declan. Well, she had made the first move asking him out, perhaps she should continue the trend. With that thought in mind, Cece stepped closer to him and reached up to bring his head down for a kiss. Kissing was a good start, they knew what to do there.
As soon as Cece had told him to make the arrangements Declan rushed to make the preparations. In spite of his doubts, he wanted to make sure that, if things were to go forward, he would make sure everything was perfect. Either of their houses were out of the question, and she was just too good for a few hours in a cheap inn, so the only answer was an expensive honeymoon suite. With the amount of money he had won from relatives too lazy to buy presents (“Here, lad, take these Galleons and buy yourself a new broomstick!”), he was lucky to have been able to afford it without having to ask his father, even if he was sure he’d get some encouragement (and lewd suggestions) from his part.
Once they were there, he started to experience that feeling of dread all over again. Luckily, as he was trying to think of Molly’s song again to soothe his nerves, Cece pulled his head down and kissed him and all his doubts vanished once again. Pulling her closer, he deepened the kiss and, for the first time since she had made the suggestion, he thought that the night would turn out to be perfect after all.
Cece shut off her thoughts and just let herself feel, enjoying the moment without thinking of what lay ahead. This approach worked successfully, the butterflies vanished and after a several minutes of heavy snogging and caresses, she was feeling warm and tingly all over, and therefore wanted more. “I have... something... to show... you,” she murmured between kisses, reluctantly pulling away so she could unbutton the front of her dress, which she’d specially picked so it was easy to remove. Licking her kiss-swollen lips, she slowly undid each button so he would start catching glimpses of the delicate and sexy lace bra she was wearing.
A little shimmy of her hips and the dress fell to her ankles, revealing the bra’s matching knickers. Cece had never undressed like this in front of Declan - or any other boy - and even though she felt a little shy again, she also felt bold and powerful. She knew she had an excellent figure, well-developed for her age with a small waist and no puppy fat. She stepped out of the dress and toyed with the ends of her hair. “I hope you like what you see.”
It was with reluctance that Declan let go of her, and once she began unbuttoning her dress an eagerness to grab her again and do it himself began to take over him. However, he was able to control his urges and allowed himself to admire the show the was putting on just for him - it was part of the special moment they were sharing, after all. Once her dress fell, he was looking at her figure in a mix of eagerness and awe. “Oh I do,” he said in a hoarse whisper.
His reaction was perfect, reassuring Cece and encouraging her, making her felt sexy and wanted. “Well I’m all yours,” she said, stepping close again and taking his hands. With only a small hesitation, she placed one of his hands on her chest. “You’re the only one I want,” she added, wanting to lay to rest any fears he had about her feelings for him in the light of Hugo’s teasing.
Again, Cece’s gesture made Declan feel torn between wanting to grab her and savour the moment. Slowly, he let his palm trace her skin until it reached the right-side strap of her bra. Gently, he pushed it aside and kissed her shoulder, followed by her neck. “And you’re the only one I want,” he whispered in her ear, before brushing his lips against her temple.
She shivered, eyes half closing as the strap slid down and his lips were on her skin. There was no going back now, and even though she was still nervous, Cece didn’t think she wanted to stop. Being in his arms like this, hearing those words, she wanted him so much that the depth of feeling shook her.
She shifted her head to seek his lips again, kissing him hungrily as her fingers got busy on his shirt, deftly undoing buttons and sliding in to touch his torso. “You’re a little over-dressed, darling,” she teased, the boldness returning. As much as she wanted him to take charge, Cece wasn’t the sort to hang back shyly when she desired something.
Declan grinned at this. Good, he wasn’t the only one who was feeling eager. Immediately he began helping her get rid of his clothes, breaking up their kisses only for brief seconds here and there, until he was wearing nothing but his boxers. The feel of her hand on his torso sent pleasant shivers up his spine, and in retaliation he teasingly ran his fingers down her chest before breaking their kiss.
Cece knew Declan had a good body, but she hadn’t quite known how good until he was practically naked before her. Fascination overcame nervousness and her exploring hands became quite bold, fingers tracing the lines of his muscles and brushing across his chest, lingering on the flat nipples.
A little gasp escaped at his teasing touch, which seemed to tingle delightfully on her skin and made her feel all warm inside. Her legs were feeling weak though and when he broke the kiss, she looked up at him with needy expression. “Perhaps we should... go to the bed?”
He nodded, his eyes looking at her with deep longing. There was no turning back now. “Yeah,” he said with the same hoarse whisper that had greeted her undressing before. He kissed her again, taking her in his arms - and before he knew it, they were half sitting, half lying down on the bed, his hands now alternating between exploring a little more of her and trying to unclasp her bra.
Everything was a blur of kisses and touches, and sensations unfamiliar and thrilling. Cece never used to understand how people could get carried away by desire, but she did now. His hands seemed to be everywhere, making her gasp and moan in a way she hadn’t thought she was capable of, while her own hands were greedily seeking out more places on him to touch. Even if she wanted to stop, she didn’t think she could.
As his hands fumbled to undo her bra, she reached back and helped, so the flimsy lingerie came free and could be tossed aside. She paused in her caresses, looking up at him, breathing hard, waiting for his reaction to seeing her bare chest for the first time.
Declan had always seen himself as a bit of a chest man, but this was the first time in his life that he had been allowed to see actual bare breasts - any of his previous attempts having been greeted with either mocking laughter or a slap on his face - and as a result he resembled a child visiting Honeydukes for the first time.
“Oh, wow,” he gasped, with the eagerness that only a teenage boy in his situation could have. He looked at her in an unspoken request for permission before reaching for one of her breasts with a trembling hand. Very soon, he was once again exploring and teasing, his lips now joining his hands in his attempt to cause a reaction out of her.
Cece wanted him to touch her so badly that she nodded very quickly when he looked at her and was tempted to pull his hand onto her. The reaction, his expression and tone, was all she could hope for and when he got bold enough to really explore, she was soon wriggling and moaning in pleasure. Somehow she managed some words in between her gasps and moans, encouragement to let him know what she liked. She was burning up inside, aching for more, and wanting to give him as much enjoyment so without thinking, she moved her hand down over his stomach to the waistband of his boxers and then down further, over the fabric, to caress what she found there. Merlin, but it seemed big and she was equally scared and excited.
With every moan and word of encouragement that left Cece’s lips, Declan became increasingly bolder. He loved the fact that he was making her feel this way, and that she was responding to his actions with equal passion. His thirst and eagerness for her was unlike anything he never felt for anything or anyone.
When her hand moved downwards and started caressing him, the surprise and excitement of her action made him gasp in a way he had never imagined he could have possibly been able to do. “Oh, Merlin,” he moaned to himself. ”Oh, Molly...”
Cece’s hand stopped abruptly. What? Stunned it took a moment for her to fully process what he’d just said and then rage exploded inside her. “WHAT?!” she shrieked and with a strength she hardly knew she possessed, she pushed him away and scrambled off the bed, hands covering her breasts. “WHAT THE FUCK?!” she yelled, her pretty face contorting with fury and humiliation.
Declan stared at her in shock and amazement, his mind having failed to register what he had done. “What?” he asked.
“Y-you said HER name! That cow... that mudblood loving trouble-making... You bastard... were you thinking of her?” Cece’s eyes filled with angry tears that rapidly spilled over as she took a couple of steps back. His amazed expression just infuriating her more. She grabbed a ornament from a nearby table and tossed it at him. Luckily for Declan’s head, her aim wasn’t very good at it hit the wall. This only made her madder. “I’m NOT MOLLY fucking CARMICHAEL!” she screamed then, throwing several quills and an ink pot at him for good measure before grabbing her dress and yanking it on. She couldn’t stay here, she had to get away, but her fingers were trembling and she was having a hard time doing up the buttons.
Having to dodge all the things being thrown his way made it impossible for Declan to think about what she was screaming at him. What did he do? And what did Molly had to do with...
Oh.
Fuck.
The sudden realization of what he’d done hit him like a Bludger, and he froze in horror - and, as a result, the ink pot hit him right in the middle of his forehead, spilling ink all over himself and the bed. However, he ignored the pain and the wetness and jumped out of the bed. He had to stop Cece. He had to reassure her that...
That what? He did utter Molly’s name, but he had no idea why. There was nothing going on between them apart from this sort of friendship they were keeping a secret and practically limiting to the journals, but he knew Cece would neither believe nor understand. Still, he had to say something. “Sweetheart...”
“DON’T SWEETHEART ME!” Cece backed away, her hands outstretched to ward him off. She was still trembling, her mouth twisted and tears flowing. “Don’t come NEAR me!” if he touched, she was sure she would take out her wand and blast him with a hex learned in Dark Arts. She felt revolted and sick, wanting to howl and wanting to scrub herself down in a shower, but most of all, desperate to leave. She jammed her feet in her shoes and made a grab for her cloak.
The anger in her voice made Declan freeze on the spot. He wanted to hold her in his arms, tell her he didn’t mean it, that he had chosen her and that it was her that he wanted to be with, and make her tears stop. But he knew it was pointless. His only chance was to convince her to stay and calm down so that they could talk about it.
“Cece, don’t go,” he pleaded in a faint, hurt voice.
She paused, staring in disbelief that he would dare to sound hurt after wounding her so badly. Yet his expression twisted something inside and instead of screaming at him, she shook her head. “I can’t stay... I have... I just... I can’t,” she stuttered, backing up with her cloak clutched to her like a child with a security blanket, looking at him in misery, her mouth bunched up and her eyes still streaming. Her back hit the door and she fumbled the handle, eyes still on him. Then the door was open and she shot him one last hurt look before bolting away, running down the corridor as fast as she could.
Declan stood still, his eyes on the door and ink dripping to the floor, for what seemed like an eternity. His worst fears had come true in a way he just hadn’t expected, and it had all been his fault. Why did he say Molly’s name? He wasn’t even thinking of her, for fuck’s sake.
Eventually, he gave up and sat on the bed, hugging himself, and started to cry.