The Web Spot

What're you supposed to do with time if you've never had it to begin with?

Greetings and Salutations!

I am very pleased to be here. My name is Aziraphale and I am a very good friend of Mr. Crowley's, as I have learned many of you call him here.

Should you find yourself in need of anything, I am certainly happy and inclined to help.

Roll Call. Who is here and are you in a safe spot? I'm going out in my suit.

[A voice post that is, understandably, frantic and frazzled. Faint metallic noises can also be heard in the background.]

Tony? Morgan, sweetie? Peter?

You're all supposed to be here!

May?

Is this happening?

You know, I don't like to tempt fate.

Okay, that's inaccurate, temptation is literally in my job title, but I digress.

Is it really...calm around here lately, or is it just me?

Fun fact: Aragorn likes to swim. Please ask how I figured that one out

Where am I? This is not Hel - I have things to do and I cannot afford to be on some sandy hel-planet. I have business to run in Hel, do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a crown in a place overrun by dead? Norns help anyone who's done this to me on purpose. I will drop you under my care there for a long, long time.

If I continue to think about the drinks I want to consume because of this, do you think they'll just appear in my hands? Asking for a friend.

Ah.

I could have done without that today. Is this place trying to make go mad? Good luck.

Remind me to never complain about the sand at the beach again.

[FILTER: Adults 21+]

For the record, I am madly in love with my wife and fuck this island for messing with that.

[FILTER: Family]

Everyone okay? I am so sorry about everything.

Looks like I'm the only Asgardian left. What a terribly familiar feeling.

I'm reminded why I'm virtually a fucking hermit. Norns have mercy, I ought to just fuck off

If you need help getting anyone who's been turned to stone, Aragorn is good at hauling things without dropping them.

Talking coconuts.

I swear, I thought I'd seen everything. It politely asked me why I stabbed it and I am not sure how to handle this fact.

I can't turn it into a drink, either, which is as frustrating as it is a good thing.

I need someone who isn't afraid worried about getting bruised and such after some punching and kicking. And who doesn't mind punching and kicking me. Chivalry is great and I appreciate the heck out of it, but right now? I really just need to get some things out of my system.


[Kristy]

Sorry about the slump. The maze sucked and I'm just hiding trying to deal with it. Everything good? Still settled? Uh, did you get stuff for school? I kind of suck at this

[Filtered away from Morgan and Peter]

I can't break into the damn maze. I failed my boy again. You better believe I'm going to keep trying.

Looks like Thor is gone again.

It's been a few days, but does this place always change like this then change back? How many times has this happened?

That was a nice little diversion, I suppose.

Thor:
We should get into a training routine. This place appears capable of throwing things at us - we should be ready for anything not so pleasant, don't you think?

Alright, I'll bite for a moment and play along with this ridiculous "network".

If Thor has left then how in Hel did he do it and why wouldn't he tell the rest of us how to get out of this horrid place? Or is the general consensus that he did not in fact try to leave and instead was sucked out the same way that he was thrown in? It would be him that leaves me here Now I have to put up with all of these idiots without some semblance of someone I like tolerate know