The breeze swung the hem of her dress and sent the loose bob of her hair into undulations, and she had to swipe an auburn curl from across her mouth as she lifted her chin to blink widely up at him. "You don't want to marry me either," she was quick to interject, because there was no way that she was going to bear the burden and guilt of that alone.
Why else would he make such a suggestion, then, if not from that place of mutual understanding? It was no secret, after all, that neither one of them were particularly happy about the way things had gone... who wanted to spend the rest of their life with someone they had almost nothing in common with? Simultaneously, though, she struggled with the notion that he was saying these things merely for his own benefit; perhaps less of a secret was the fact that almost every eligible girl in their age bracket (and even beyond, the last she'd heard) wanted him to warm their beds.
She turned to face back out ahead of her and was quiet for some time. Like the leisurely pace they'd set in their strolling, the conversation carried no sense of urgency, and for once she took the time to weigh her response instead of jumping on her suspicions and accusing him. As of tomorrow she wouldn't get the chance to talk with him again for who knew how long... this reminder, surprisingly bittersweet, was enough to smooth the edge off of her voice when she finally responded, staring out at the scattering of leaves in their restless dervish.
"I don't want to marry some Castyllian," she admitted. "I don't know if I want to get married at all. I don't even know if I can be happy with anyone, or if they-" She cut herself short as though surprised by the trajectory of her own confession, though her cheeks instantly ignited. She pointedly kept her gaze averted from him and shrugged. "And you say you wouldn't but everyone else certainly would."
She tried not to let it bother her that other people tended to favor Luke the way they did, but it was hard not to hear the things people said sometimes.
"Even though we both know it would barely be moments later until you were holding someone else against you if I did."