Private
"I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain."
Something I read once. The most significant part, to me, is that fears must be faced if you don't want them to control you.
Yes, special. That was when I put humanity aside and became a soldier, what my people called a Death Dealer, in our centuries-long war. Because of what we became, we were nightlocked, unable to face the ultraviolet rays from the sun without burning. So, you see, I did choose the dark. The darkness of deep space seemed familiar and welcoming to me.
While I did grow out of that unfortunate allergy finally, I am still a creature of the night. It was only natural for me to make my home on a ship traveling where it is always night, with the stars around me instead of just above.
If you believe in a Supreme Being, you may find Him looking back at you, through you, the first time you try a solitary space walk.