Free will!
Who: Alex & Jasper What: evening in the camp, Alex goes to check on the healing Jasper When: Day 29, evening
After his talk with Angelica, Alex headed over to where Jasper sat, looking miserable. She had to be in pain he thought, but she was healing and seemed to be healing well from her injuries. "Hi," he said softly, "Can I join you?" he asked, not presuming. If she didn't want to be bothered then that was fine, he wouldn't take offense. Then again, Alex rarely took personal offense at anything,he was too easy going to do so. "I brought water if you want some," he offered.
Jasper was stuck babysitting. She could've been off doing something important and useful, like scouting. When that job had been called up, Jasper really needed to surpress the urge to whip a rock at whoever volunteered because that was the kind of thing she did, and it was driving her slowly bugfuck to be sitting around doing nada. Even Corbin, who she was supposed to be watching, was being incredibly boring by sleeping in a patch of grass in the shade just out of the sun's reach. Adorable as that was... yeah. No. That was boring.
So it was with pleasure that she recieved Alex just because he was, if nothing else, a distraction from her sheer uselessness. "That would be nice, thank you. Would you like to pull up a rock and join me?"
With a smile, he sat down gingerly, his body sore and tired from the day's attempts at learning the lumberjack trade without actually having equipment to be a lumberjack. "Here," he said, offering her some water. He'd been drinking a lot this past day, it felt good. "It's room temp, but hey...it's wet and it's water, right? I assume it's clean. How do you feel?" he asked concerned. He looked fine and felt less than stellar. She could look horrible and feel great for all he knew, but he hadn't missed her glare when the scouting position was offered nor did he miss that she hadn't even made a token offer. That in itself told him a lot.
"I hurt." Jasper took the water and a sip of it. It seemed fine to her so she continued to consume it in small sips between words. "I'm frustrated and angry and tired of sitting on my ass..." she shot a glance at Corbin, who was still asleep. "Backside, sorry, all day long where I have five points of view. The inside of the lean-to, and the four cardinal directions out here on this wonderful rock. I'm bored, but nothing that I can do while sitting appeals enough that I could give it my full concentration, y'know?" She sighed. "Meanwhile everyone is working their... backsides... off and I can't do anything to help that I wouldn't get tired of ten minutes from now." Jasper was, fundamentally, an honest person, and that was probably why she went on a spiel about the entire thing. "...I also could use a bath, but as it is I'm rather stuck."
He had asked and she had answered. He wouldn't have asked if he hadn't cared and this was truthfully what he wanted to hear, good and bad. "You can curse if you need to," he offered. She looked like she might need it if only to let off some steam. "Sounds like the curse of the invalid doesn't change no matter where you are," he commiserated, not trying to tell her that it wouldn't be much longer or that if she rested she would heal better. She knew these things. "Can you take a bath?" he asked, "That is, will Thorne let you yet? Or even a sponge bath?" not that they had any sponges, but it would be something anyways, to try to help. "I'd gladly watch the kids if you'd like to get one of the ladies to help you," he didn't offer to help her himself for obvious reasons.
"Ashwin went that way over there..." she waved towards where the other camp-cooks, so to speak, were doing mysterious things with not-food to turn it into actual-food, like cooking it, and the kid had gone to help. "I just have Corbin to watch. Y'know how I found these kids? I'm running back from the desert and I'm just protein hungry, y'know? I didn't have time to do any hunting. And I smelled blood so I figured, maybe there's something there I can get before it spoils. There's a broken branch on the ground, a few junker bits on the ground, like beads and things, some splashes of blood, and laugher prints. And I hear this noise up in the tree, and there are these two kids huddled up here. So, of course, I bring them with. And you know what really, really pisses me off about it? That I actually, for just a second, thought that none of this would've happened if I'd left them there." Jasper looked so disgusted, she actually spat on the ground. "I am not a good person."
Pursing his lips for a moment, Alex finally asked, "Is this your confession?" and crossed himself, wishing he had a stole. It sounded like one to him, one he knew needed to be heard and never repeated. "You understand what that means when I say it?" he added as an afterthought, in case she needed an explanation. To him, right now, it didn't matter if she was Catholic or not or believed or not, her soul needed to be heard and she needed forgiveness, whether she accepted it from him or from a higher power.
"Ugh. I don't know what it is." Jasper sighed, setting her elbow on the knee of her good leg, making a fist, and setting it under her chin. "Me bitching about myself, more than anything, I think. I'm not a Catholic. Sorry man. The few sort-of hymns I know I learned from CDs and from other people. I don't even know what some of the lyrics mean in a few of them since they're in Latin. So I guess it's not a confession in the real sense of the term."
"Confession is when you tell me what is bothering you, your sins if you will. Things you shouldn't have done. I in turn offer guidance if I can and ways you can give restitution and offer you absolution. More than that, I cannot speak of anything told me as a confession to anyone. Ever," he explained, "Normally, you would be anonymous as well, though it's not uncommon for a priest to recognize a voice or something. Regardless, we do not acknowledge you directly, if that makes sense? If you confessed to murder as a confession, I couldn't tell the police...even if that just means Angelica. I legally cannot even be subpoenaed if we were on Earth," he let her digest that information for a moment, "Any questions?"
"Yeah, I think I'm good. You don't have to treat this like a confession. Like I said, it's just... more like me bitching about myself. Me being stupid or mean without a reason, and it's just all a mess. I'm slowly going bugfuck without being able to run, that's all." Jasper said a little uneasily. She'd always treaded very lightly around the religions of the various cultures she'd encountered and hadn't any wish to offend Alex because the circumstances weren't right or she wasn't Catholic or anything. "I mean, if you just want to hang out as a friend I'd appreciate it but I don't want to suddenly be, like, a... a client, for lack of a better term."
With an amused smile, Alex shook his head, "It's not like that, not doctor patient or lawyer client or whatever. I can hear confession and still be your friend. No judgment. But it's alright if you don't wish for it, we can still always talk and be friends. Some people...they like that security, you know? Not that I gossip much in general, but confession is different. As for being a bad person...well, thoughts like those are natural. They're not the nicest, but they are human. That's why the little cartoon man always has an angel and a devil on his shoulders when faced with a dilemma. The question is - did you act on them? And you didn't, you took the kids here, did the best you could for them and were hurt for it. Was it the easy choice? No. Was it the right one? Yes," he patted her shoulder gently, "We always have free will Jasper to make decisions."
"I didn't think I'd get hurt at the time. Annoyed, maybe. Kids ask a lot of questions." Jasper gave him a vaguely disgruntled look. She obviously didn't spend a whole lot of time around kids as a general rule. But she seemed to be feeling better, and that just added to what she said next. "Thanks for listening, man. I appreciate it. If you ever need a shoulder to bitch on, just let me know. Anyway, what crazy things have you been up too today?"
"Eh..." Alex trailed off, not really speaking and then shrugged, "I'm fine. Nothing to complain about really. No more than anyone else here at least," in truth, he wasn't really comfortable saying what his problems were and discussing them. It wasn't that he felt he had to be macho, but how did he explain that he missed celebrating mass and missed the companionship of the other priests and such? It was hard to be a priest alone in a group like this and he had been here nearly a month. He hadn't confessed in that time and while he had prayed...well, there was no sense in complaining. There was nothing that could be done, so he simply didn't. He wasn't having a crisis of faith, that was as strong as ever, he was having a crisis of lifestyle. There was a reason that priests lived as they did and this was exactly why, right here. "Oh, you know me, Jasper. I'm always getting into some sort of trouble. Mostly I've just been doing various council things," he smiled, then began to sing, "I'm a lumberjack and I'm okay! I sleep all night and work all day!"
"...yeah, crazy things." Jasper smirked lazily and stretched, popping her back. "Oh, there's an idea. Well, if we had any chert, anyway. My parents are anthropologists. I learned how to make spear points, arrow heads, knives, and hand axes from chert. I mean, if that's something people are interested in. We keep finding things so it might end up being a completely useless skill."
"Talk to Adnan then, he could use help with that. We're trying to chop down trees with the axes he made and we're making progress," very slow progress, "but any help or ideas you have would be welcome. I'm just the muscle for the group. Not even a lot of muscle," compared to Aaron and some of the others anyways. He was the shortest and least experienced too, he thought. It didn't entirely matter, he still pulled his weight regardless. "I know Angelica's working on learning to use the bow and arrows and so's the Colonel too."
"Adnan, Adnan!" Jasper threw up her hands in what could be best described as cheerful disgust. "I don't know which one he is, and apparently he even has a map! I swear, I want to walk just so I can pounce him and wrestle the map away so I can just see it!"
Laughing, Alex pointed to a man's silhouetted by the dimming light. "That guy," he said. "Don't know about a map...maybe," he had heard something about it, but couldn't recall what exactly to agree with her, "Why don't you pounce on him later? After you're more healed. I don't much want to have to give you the sacrament of the sick again. Unless you'd like it," which he doubted given her avoidance of a formal confession as well.
Jasper pursed her lips thoughtfully. "Since I'm not sure what that is, I'm going to have to go with 'no' for the moment. And I'm not really sick now, anyway. Maybe sick in the head, but that's pretty normal for me."
"The sacrament of the sick is more commonly known as 'last rites,'" everyone had heard of that it seemed, "but that's not really a good name because you don't have to be dying to receive it, only really sick. Not a cold or something mild, I mean. I gave it to you when we pulled out of the water," he figured at the time it was better to ask forgiveness for it later than permission. It would have made him feel better too if they had failed, thankfully, she was just fine.
She looked impressed. "Was I that bad off? All I remember is getting into the water and then waking up and yelling at Thorne for some bloody reason. I think I was yelling. Whatever. Still. Wow." Jasper looked thoughtful for a moment. "Thanks, though. I mean, for doing that."
"You weren't breathing," Alex informed her, "Angelica and I gave you CPR until Thorne could get to you and take over," which had been a good thing. Neither of them were doctors, even though they knew CPR. "You're welcome though. I'm glad you lived...even if healing is annoying."
"Will you forgive me if I'm snappish and want to bite people?" She raised an eyebrow and looked kind of amused. "And not just because it's your job to be forgiving?"
"Depends..." he pretended to consider, "you going to bite me?" He'd forgive her, whether the person she bit would was something else entirely. "And have you had your shots? I don't want rabies."
Jasper laughed. "Don't worry, I'm up to date on everything. The vast majority of my races wouldn't let me enter if I wasn't, what with being in weird and random countries. And I probably won't bite anyone, but I'll probably really want too at some point. I'm pretty sure I don't have rabies..." she held up her arm that had a shallow but still rather nasty looking nip from one of the dogs the day previous, "but I'll let you know in a few days for sure."
"Good point. It's been a while since I've run a marathon, forgot that they want your shots," of course, his marathons had been in Boston and the surrounding area, not in random countries. She was an entirely different caliber of athlete than he was, "Biting is a bad idea. We're not so desperate around here that we need to resort to cannibalism," a yawn interrupted his train of thought and he paused, covering his mouth with one hand, "Anyways. I think that's my cue for evening prayers. You need anything? Other than to hurry up and feel better?"
"Not tonight, but maybe when you have some time you could help me make a pair of crutches?" Jasper gave him a hopeful look, then lazily, and very lightly, punched his shoulder in a friendly sort of way. "Though Doc might object for a little while, so you're off the hook... for the time being." And she grinned. "Oh, and if you could get Corbin so I can harass someone into putting him to bed, that'd be cool." And she grinned.
"I'll get him," Alex offered, spying the boy not too far away. "And I'll see what we can do about crutches or something...no promises. Dr. Thorne'll make those calls and you know it," he took his punch like a man and grinned, climbing slowly to his feet. "Corbin!" he called, heading over to where the boy was inspecting some sort of bug, "Bed time, shortstuff!" He had called his nieces and nephews 'shortstuff' too. Picking the child up around his waist, he carried him over to where Jasper was sitting. "Where do you want him?" he asked, holding him over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes as the child giggled. "And do you need help getting up for bed too?"
Jasper used one of her many sticks to help lever herself up to standing, even if it was on one leg, and she gestured unsteadily to the leanto. "Just in there. The kids like to sleep like a litter of puppies - all over the place."
Nodding, he offered her a hand then set Corbin on the ground and nudged him towards the lean-to so that Alex could help Jasper. "You're doing good here," he informed her quietly, "Taking care of these kids...it might not be what you expected or where you saw yourself, but you're doing a good job. You should know that," he helped her hobble to the lean to and sit down where she indicated then placed a hand on her cheek before turning to Corbin, "Alright, shortstuff. You need to pee?" he asked, years of babysitting for his nieces and nephews coming in handy now. When Corbin shook his head and laid down, Alex headed out of the lean to. "I'll talk to you later, alright?"
"I really didn't expect to be the babysitter of two children on an alien planet, no..." Jasper said dryly, with a grin. "They seem cool. Y'know. For kids." With Alex's help she settled into a comfortable position, which was sitting up. She wanted to be able to see what was going on if something did happen.