Swallow your pride and apologize....
Who: Angelica (CLOSED) When: Morning of Day Eleven What: Any version of an apology is still an apology, right? Where: The climber tree Rating: G, Angelica's nice today
Angelica didn't often feel guilty for her actions. The detective's history was a rather brash and blunt one. She had always been the one to say things that others didn't want to hear. She generally was the personification of bad cop. She didn't mean to be so horrible to others at times. She didn't have anyone. She was stuck in a place that was unfamiliar for all of them, but she wasn't making friends either. If she was going to survive this, she needed to stop making only enemies. Alex had extremely valid points and she'd pushed him away.
Why had she pushed him away so quickly? Probably because he made her think about things that she thought she'd already buried. Angelica hated thinking about her family. She didn't want to remember her Nana dragging her to church or the fact that she'd heard that her mom was religious and though everything would work out. Things went wrong, shit happened. She didn't want to admit that she was such a small part of the greatness in the world. Angelica didn't want to think about religion, she didn't want to risk losing anyone else, or feeling.
Angelica didn't want to feel hurt anymore. She didn't want to have pain. She didn't want to see someone make the mistake of feeling something for her, especially friendship. Those ties were dangerous, they meant more than most people realized to the redheaded detective. Angelica would always be fiercely loyal to those that she loved, no matter what. Her partners had never lasted long, but it had never been because she'd let them get hurt. She naturally pushed others away and many people couldn't deal with that. People don't deal well with rejection, and people need human contact and interaction. Angelica was no different.
The guilt had settled in the most when talking to Ryan, and Angelica honestly didn't know what to do. She didn't want to walk up to him like a child and apologize like it was something her mommy made her do. She couldn't think of what else to do, though. Dozing off and on throughout the night, Angelica was up before the sun. She didn't bother to move, her jacket was on her and she could feel the notebook digging into her side.
The thought wasn't automatic, it took her a few moments. She thought it over carefully. Would he still be upset? Would he forgive her? Was it too impersonal? Honestly, the answers weren't going to come to her. She had to take a chance, though. You don't get anywhere by not taking the opportunities that life presents.
It was a fumbled movement to grab her pen and the small pad of paper, but once she had them out, Angelica stilled her body to make sure that no one was watching her. When she was sure that everyone seemed to still be sleeping, she gently clicked the top of the pen, the sound echoing around her as if she'd just fired a gun. Still no reaction. Angelica didn't waste the moment and pressed the tip of the pen to the paper, though she didn't know what to write. She laid there, holding the pad and pen frozen for a few long moments before she wrote, in her messy scrawl: 'I'm sorry.' Angelica wasn't one for an excess of words, and she didn't want to overdo it. It was simple, and it was an apology.
The police detective sat up quietly and ripped the small piece of paper off of the hand held notebook. Shoving what she didn't need into her pockets, she slid off of the hammock and onto the branches. It was a few awkward moments as she maneuvered around the branches until she could see and just barely reach the hammock. She wasn't waking anyone and she wasn't going to be creepy. She leaned far enough to reach him and settled the small piece of paper in the empty hammock. After she achieved that she pulled back and climbed back to her own hammock, settling down to lie there for at least a little bit before everyone started to wake up.