Mary Winchester {is not a hunter} (nohunting) wrote in thedoorway, @ 2015-09-22 00:16:00 |
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Mary was pretty sure her head was going to explode. After everything she’d seen growing up, you’d think that would have made it easier to understand the strange things that had happened to her in the last few hours, but it really probably only made it harder. Time travel would have been enough to set her back, but she could have, eventually, taken it in stride; it was pretty easy to prove, after all. But everything else? Multiple people she’d never met who claimed to know her--or John. John. How the hell did he get mixed up in hunting? What about their son? Mary had sworn that her children would never grow up knowing the monsters were real--had she broken that promise to herself? And Dean “Van Halen” (she wasn’t stupid enough to believe that was his real name), a man whom she would always associate with the deaths of her parents and John and that Deal, he was there as well, claiming to be her Dean. It was all too much to process. Instead of responding, she totally left the computer alone and went for a walk; she didn’t really know how any of the machine worked anyway. The walk didn’t last long, as it didn’t really provide her any answers and she quickly found that clearing her mind when there were so many people on the crowded streets, so she headed back inside; she wasn’t at all ready to confront these men who were making these claims about her son and her future, but unless she wanted to retreat entirely and avoid every person who might know her, she’d have to face it head-on. Sending one last message with her room number, she sat down in the shared living space to wait. --- Despite his calm, there was an undercurrent of tension in Sam’s posture, and in his expression, most visible in the tightness of his jaw. He was glad that their mother was here, he really was -- having met her here once before and actually gotten to know her, he’d missed her even more as a result -- but there were a lot of emotions to hold at bay, in order to deal with this calmly. He wanted to ease Mary into all of this as gently as possible, but at a certain point, they were just going to have to bite the bullet and give her some really unpleasant information. There was no getting around the fact that she’d died, that her sons had grown up without her, and that they were hunters. They were more immersed into the world of monsters than she’d ever been. And that wasn’t her fault. But he knew she was going to blame herself for it, and that it would hurt, and there was nothing that could really prepare any of them for dealing with this, no matter how much they tried to steel themselves against it. Outside her door, he glanced over at Dean, silently, and then lifted a hand and knocked on the door. -- He’d not long left this same apartment and now here he was again, about to reconnect with another amazing woman from his past. He’d seen this younger version of his Mom before, he knew how sparky she was and he wasn’t entirely convinced they would have it easy trying to explain who they were to her. If he was in her shoes he’d probably be throwing Holy water in faces and making demands. Again, she was probably the one he got that from. John had been far too sweet when he’d met him, it was tough believing their father was the same guy. Blowing out a breath he hadn’t known he’d been holding, he gave Sam a small nod as he looked over at him. He knew by the set of Sammy’s jaw that his little brother was just as tense as he was, despite his apparent calm. You didn’t grow up with someone and not learn their tells. He knew exactly what Sam was thinking, how they would have to break the inevitable bad news; and how their Mom would no doubt blame herself entirely for what they and their Dad had become. Last time they’d met, she’d wanted out. To settle and make a life without Demons or Monsters. To be safe with her John and raise a family. How differently things had turned out. -- She was up and at the door within seconds, but her hand stilled on the knob for a long moment before she actually opened it. Before her stood two men, one she thought could be the one she’d spoken to on the network, the other...well, she definitely recognized him. The sight of them stirred up a lot of feelings, especially Dean. The hunter Dean who had shown up on the case that killed her parents and John. The Dean who was now claiming to be her Dean, her son, from the future. Therefore, it was not the taller man she was staring at, but the one she knew. She was trying to see if she could see it, see him in her child’s face. “Come in, I guess,” she said, holding the door open and standing aside. She hadn’t yet made up her mind about their story, but given her upbringing, there wasn’t a whole lot that could prove that what they were saying wasn’t at all possible. She’d seen weirder things happen. “So if I’ve got this right, I’m in the future, you’re my son, and hunting is a part of your life and John’s.” --- It was equal parts easier and harder to be the one who wasn't on the receiving end of Mary's stare. On the one hand, he didn't have to deal with the hostility of it, which he imagined must be really painful; on the other, he wanted to be a part of the reunion, heart wrenching as it was. He stayed quiet, letting them have their moment, unable to find it in his heart to begrudge either of them for it. He almost decided not to say anything at all, to let Dean explain. But when she laid out the facts like that, he felt obligated to speak, to reveal the secret he'd been keeping from her. To explain his whole presence here, really, because he was sure he'd end up on the end of a suspicious stare sooner rather than later if he didn't. "Yes," he said, his voice coming out low and even, as if he was trying to make it as little of an interruption as possible. Despite his height, he somehow managed to make himself seem unobtrusive, too, his whole mien quiet and reserved. "We can explain all that. And... I didn't want to overwhelm you, before, but I'm also your son. My name is Sam. I was born in 1983." -- As soon as the door opened, Dean felt his Mom’s eyes on him, he was under intense scrutiny while Sam was being ignored. Somehow that made him more uncomfortable than being the centre of attention -he’d felt exactly the same way when Cas had rocked up with his ‘more profound bond’ nonsense. Call it brotherly instincts or whatever. Stepping into the apartment when invited, he almost made a beeline straight for the couch, then decided against it. He didn’t want to have to explain why he was comfortable enough to make himself at home there this early on. He nodded an affirmative to her one line summary and opened his mouth to reply when Sam spoke up. Keeping quiet, his gaze went from Sam, to their Mother, trying to gage what her reaction was as the new information sunk in. “We’re both Hunters, Mom. But Sammy here, he’s been to College.” There was a note of pride in his voice and he smiled, even though he’d given his brother hell for leaving the family, he saw now how similar Sam’s feelings about Hunting were to their Mother’s. They’d both wanted a normal life… and now he could see the attraction of that too. -- What had started off as a lot to take in became an impossible amount of information to accept and process, and Mary needed a minute (or 10) to compose herself. She was already shaking her head at the impossibility that her son--sons--could be hunters, but even as she turned her back on them and crossed to the nearest piece of furniture to brace herself on, her mind was already working on putting together the pieces--of that night seven years ago, of the things they’d both told her on the computer. Confusing as it was, and she was obviously missing pieces, it still seemed to fit. The way Dean had looked at her every time he saw her, the way he knew where that demon had been about to hit. Time travel didn’t seem possible, but that part, at least, added up. She breathed out slowly through her mouth, her stomach in knots, feeling sick. “How? How did I let this happen?” she asked, mostly to herself, but she still turned to look at them, confusion and pain written on her features. “What happened?” --- Sympathy and affection were written all over Sam’s face. He couldn’t help it; he knew this must be horrible news for her to hear. It had been gut-wrenching every time he got pulled back into the life, even if he knew he belonged there, and that was only how he felt about it for himself. Other people’s pain usually hurt him even more than his own, especially the pain of people he loved, but he still couldn’t even begin to know what it would be like from a parent’s’ perspective. He glanced at Dean with a small smile when he heard the note of pride, and opened his mouth to respond to it -- to say something about how smart Dean was, though he’d never been to college -- but the look on their mother’s face made the words stick in his throat. He swallowed it down, and took a deep breath. “It was the demon, Mom,” he said. Mom slipped out almost without him thinking about it, and then he couldn’t take it back. “The yellow-eyed demon. He came back, ten years later. For… me.” Guilt and grief made his throat close over, and he couldn’t get the rest out. He looked at Dean for help. -- Watching as their mom turned her back on them, Dean knew exactly what must be running through her mind. He felt terrible for piling so much on her so soon after her arrival. But on the other hand he'd want to know, if he were in her shoes. Meeting Sam's gaze briefly, he could see he was about to jump in with a response, but their mother spoke first. Swallowing, he shifted uncomfortably, staring at a point just beyond Mary's shoulder, as Sam started to explain. Recognizing the emotion in Sammy's voice, he met his gaze and steeled himself to finish the explanation. "Demon came back to finish the deal you made. He went into Sammy's room... you tried to protect Sam and you-" His jaw clenched, whole body feeling numb, unwilling to say what he was about to, but knowing he must. "That yellow eyed bastard murdered you. Dad found you... and he swore from then on he wouldn't stop hunting that demon for as long as he lived." -- Mary could have dropped dead on the floor right then. She felt a little like she actually might, too. Of course it was that demon, she’d fooled herself into forgetting, into thinking that she could actually have a normal life and forget everything about her life growing up. She was foolish, naive, an idiot. How could she have possibly thought that she could keep her family out of the life after making that deal? A tear slipped out of the corner of her eye and she hurriedly wiped it away, trying to keep her composure. If these really were her sons, then she didn’t want them to see her cry or fall apart. But she didn’t know how long she could keep it together. She needed to process everything. What if growing up hunters had made their life awful? The fact that they looked to be older than her and still alive was a good sign, but that didn’t mean they were happy and living good lives (and really, being hunters, how safe and happy could they be?) “I think I need some time. A few days, maybe. I can’t do this right now, I’m sorry.” -- Sam opened his mouth to say something, and then closed it again. What he really wanted to do was hug her, but wasn’t sure if that was something she’d want, so he stayed where he was. “That’s alright,” he said finally, gently. His expression was still sad, but understanding. “It’s a lot, I know.” He shook his head. “But you don’t have anything to apologize for. I’m sorry we had to dump all of this on you.” -- Dean saw the tear, just one and wiped away so quickly that he shouldn’t have noticed, but he had. It was his fault, he’d made his mother cry, and so he stepped forward and did something he hadn’t done since he was a kid. He hugged his mom, whether she’d return it or not. “I’m sorry. Take all the time you need and call us when you’re ready. It’s okay.” Moving away, he looked at Sammy, nudging his ‘little’ brother toward the door. |