Stark turned in his chair and looked at Jasper as he entered, rubbing his chin reflectively he smiled at the former SHIELD agent and got to his feet to greet him properly. It meant a lot to him that Sitwell had come up to see him. He knew he had dangled an irresistible carrot in front of him to guarantee the company, but that didn’t take away from the gesture. Tony didn’t really believe that anything in the world was free; there was a price tag on everything. This didn’t mean that he thought things like love or friendship could be bought, by any means. But relationships only existed successfully when coupled with compromise. There was always a sacrifice, always a cost. Giving Jasper a tour as payment for an ear to listen barely registered.
In his hands, he held a small screwdriver and a stained grey rag which he was wiping it off with. As he walked towards Jasper, his head remained bowed, focused on what he was doing, as he spoke.
“You know, a famous man once said: ‘we are what we love’.” Stark looked up at Jasper and smiled at him a little before gesturing around himself to the room they stood in. “I’ve always liked that better. You know, we’re not what we do, what we eat, I don’t even think we are who we pretend to be -- who said that? ‘Be careful who you pretend to be because you are who you pretend to be’. Vonnegut, I think.”
Stark turned the handle of the screwdriver in his hand and held it out to Jasper. Last week, he’d robbed casinos and brought down giants alive because Jasper had asked him to. This week he was watching a kid who’d lost control over a life that was never his fling himself into a grave. It felt the same. Like, if very cold or very hot water is run over fingertips long enough, the body can’t distinguish between the two sensations. Hot, cold, exhilaration, grief -- it all stretched him thin, it all hollowed out his chest and made his ribs hurt.
“This -- this is what I love. We’re standing in the middle of it. I like, I like fixing things, solving problems. Not because it’s the right thing, not because I feel some driving urge to do it, but because I can.” His expression tightened. “But sometimes -- sometimes I forget that I can’t. Jasper, I’m not buying OsCorp, but I think I might be murdering Harry Osborn.”