Luke Skywalker Didn't Know She Was His Sister (jedifarmboy) wrote in thedoorway, @ 2015-01-24 23:04:00 |
|
|||
Entry tags: | !log, luke skywalker, rikki barnes / nomad (616) |
Who: Luke Skywalker and Rikki Barnes
When: January 17th or somewhere thereabouts
Where: The gym in the Tower
What: Luke is teaching Rikki how to meditate
Rating: PG for discussions of nightmares, death and general unhappy things
Status: Complete
Rikki took a deep breath and centered herself. This was not a big deal. Ground your stance, focus on your target. Air out and right jab, the bag swinging just slightly from the force of the hit. She had been the one to ask him for help. Stay focused, follow up. Sure he was Luke Skywalker and even Rikki knew that was a big deal, but she had trained with Steve Rogers and Black Widow, some of the greats of either of her worlds. Keep on target, again. The fact that he had said yes was not something to be nervous about. Again. Again. The bag kept swinging and Rikki kept hitting. It was slow, methodical, focused. Training she could control, the situation was completely within her limits. But the same practice over and over didn’t teach her anything all it did was refine the muscle memory already built up. The skills were kept sharp but pushing herself was how her mind would stay sharp. Anakin and everything that he was, everything his family was, it brought in further complications. Even if her relationship with Anakin was part of the reason Skywalker said yes it was still an opportunity that she needed, training she wouldn’t have otherwise. She had spent her life as a hero with no powers trying to go toe to toe with those that did. And a Jedi was just something else entirely. Again. But there was no person in this or any world who couldn’t be beaten. You just had to figure out how. And this was a step in that direction. And he wanted to meet with her to train. No matter the reasons Rikki had to give this everything that she would give to any other master who was willing to work with her. Deep breath, step back, hand out. The bag fell back into place, waiting just like she was. Luke had come to like Rikki a great deal even though they hadn’t spent a lot of time together. It was obvious that she made Anakin happy so that made Luke happy. He wasn’t sure that he could help her but he wanted to try. Maybe there was something that he could do to at least help her learn how to deal with the dreams even though she wasn’t Force sensitive. However, Luke had come to discover since he’d arrived here that some people were sensitive but since this world didn’t recognize the Force, they didn’t realize what they might be capable of. He didn’t know if Rikki was one of those people but Anakin had felt drawn to her so that might indicate a latent ability. He didn’t know and there was only one way to find out. He pushed open the door to the gym and stood for a moment watching Rikki with the bag and then walked over to her. “Hi,” he said. “I’m sorry I’m late. I got stuck at work a little longer than I had meant to. I hope you haven’t been waiting long.” Just how much Anakin had told his uncle Rikki wasn’t entirely sure. But she had a feeling she could bet pretty heavily on everything. Well just about everything, there were some very specific details she was pretty sure even Anakin wasn’t going to share with his uncle no matter how close they were. But when it came to Onslaught for some reason Anakin thought he could find something to fix what couldn’t necessarily be fixed. Some horrors were just too big for that. “I don’t think you’re late?” Rikki brushed a bit of hair back into place as she answered. Really he could have been, it’s not like Rikki hadn’t kept herself busy. Idle hands were not something that a Barnes did particularly well with. “I got here early. Can’t have enough practice right? I mean I spend a lot of afternoons here anyway. Or training somewhere else. And I mean you’re the one doing me the favor so it’s not like I could be picky. I’m babbling aren’t I? Sorry.” He gave a chuckle and shook his head. “it’s okay and yes you were babbling a little bit but don’t worry, I still babble sometimes myself.” Particularly when it came to some subjects but that was beside the point. “And no, practice is never a bad thing. It’s the only way to get better at something. Took me a while to figure that one out but I finally did.” Luke had just assumed at the beginning that once he learned how to use the Force that was it. There was no need to practice it but he was dead wrong about that. The skills that he had now would be non existent if he hadn’t spent time working on them. “Let’s sit down over there,” he said, indicating a bench. “there are a few things I’d like to ask you first before we do anything.” He wanted to hear about the dreams from Rikki. Not that he doubted anything his nephew had told him but Rikki was the one who’d experienced them and Luke wanted to hear it from her. An eyebrow rose up before she could stop herself but Rikki dutifully followed orders. She did know how to even if sometimes it seemed like she just did whatever she wanted to at the moment. Honestly Rikki liked the structure of orders, of falling into step with someone else. It was just that she had found that there were very few people whose orders were worth following. A teacher’s were, so Rikki sat down and folded her hands in her lap neatly. Maybe this was a meditation thing? She knew Anakin did quite a bit. It was never something she had given much thought to but it seemed important to the jedi. If he had questions then she would have to have answers. Honesty was important in training. “Yeah, sure, I can answer questions.” She nodded and tilted her head towards him expectantly. He looked over at her. He could sense that she was ready to get started and that she had expected something completely different than answering questions and that didn’t surprise him. Luke already knew that Rikki was more of an action person, he’d seen that from the few moments he’d watched her training before he’d spoken to her. “Tell me about your dreams,” he said simply. “If we’re going to find a way to help you, I need to know what you’re seeing. I know only what Anakin’s told me and I don’t need the Force to tell me that you’ve probably not told him everything.” He wouldn’t have if he were in her shoes. The dreams. Right. Of course. The ends of Rikki’s fingertips went numb for a moment, the cool wash of fear that was inescapable when it came to Onslaught and the nightmares that accompanied him. Her lips went tight as she tried to think of a way out of this. Logically she knew that Anakin had told him, Anakin told his uncle pretty much everything. And he was so focused on trying to find a way out when there really wasn’t one. “I’ve told him more than I’ve told anyone else here.” Rikki looked away and frowned just slightly as she stared at the punching bag. Aggression was something she could understand, something to focus on that wasn’t hopelessness. “He’s insistent he’s going to find some magic way to fix all this but there isn’t. There isn’t some magical way to change what I am and what Onslaught is either.” “No there isn’t but to help you find a way to at least deal with the dreams, I need to understand Onslaught a little better,” Luke looked at her, wishing that he did have some magic that could change things for her. “I’m afraid that some of the things that might help are things I’m not allowed to teach you but there are some things that I can. If nothing else, it will help you sleep. But first I need to understand what we’re dealing with.” “I sleep fine.” Rikki’s arms crossed over her chest. It was half of stubbornness and half protecting herself from this conversation. Theoretically she could run. There was no way Luke could force her to answer, well there was but he wouldn’t. That wasn’t the kind of person he was. But these people, they didn’t understand just what it was that made her blood run cold. And fine, they wouldn’t. Even when she explained it without truly knowing... and how could they? A great and heavy sigh escaped her as her head fell down. Damnit Anakin. “He’s.. energy. He’s a psionic force that’s born from the powers of two of the most powerful mutants to exist. He absorbs mutants and can’t really ever actually die. But he can be contained in the negative zone, a space between universes. Which is where I put him when I first died.” She shifted, pulling her legs up to her chest and resting her chin on her knees. “He remade me and pushed me into another universe. I guess it was weaker or something. But I’m made from him. So if the walls are weak enough, he can pull through. And the only way to stop it is to destroy the vessel before he’s fully over.” “And you are the vessel,” Luke was beginning to understand why Anakin was worried. “and the dreams you’ve been having. They make you think he might be trying to come back?” He wasn’t sure how he could help her if this being was energy and could be trapped in between universes but he wanted to try if he could. “How did you stop him the first time. I mean how did you put him into the negative zone?” “The dreams were how it started the last time.” The stupid dreams that she didn’t understand until it was too late. It had all been a trap, one that played on her own stubbornness and recklessness. She should have known better, she was supposed to know better. But now they were happening again and maybe it was nothing but what if it wasn’t? Gravity wasn’t here. “It wasn’t just me. I was more the... shove. It’s not like I can open pathways to the negative zone.” “Well I think what might help is meditating before you go to bed at night. It will put you in a safe place so to speak,” he explained. “help you to put up a sort of mental wall. I’m not sure if that will work because most of the true wall building things I know can’t be used by someone who isn’t Force sensitive. I mean they could be but that would mean letting me inside your head and I can’t do that. That’s how Dark Jedi control people and I would never do that to anyone.” Luke knew it would be far too easy for him to do given his power and he would never allow himself to do that. “but the meditation, that I can teach you.” He shook his head as he remembered being told about the technique from Obi-Wan. “I didn’t want to learn how to do it when I first started. I thought it was stupid, I thought Jedi were supposed to fight but it’s a lot more than that. So if you want to say that it sounds like a really dumb idea, go ahead. It’s nothing I haven’t said myself but I promise you that it helps.” Meditating. Rikki couldn’t help the eyebrow that shot up slightly and maybe that was a little rude. Logically it could help, getting her mind in some kind of order. But meditation was not exactly something that she had given much thought to. The closest she ever got was the sort of zen moment in practice or in a fight where all that seemed to matter was where her body went next. “I’m not a jedi.” She pointed out, which they both clearly knew. And she certainly wasn’t force sensitive. Luke was offering to help though and Rikki was not really in a position to turn him down. She could already hear Steve in her head telling her to be more open minded about alternative solutions. After all keeping yourself narrowly focused on only one result would blind you to the other possible solutions in a fight. Letting her knees go, Rikki sat up straight. “Ok, so, meditation. I’ve... walked in on Anakin like that. I’m not really sure how you’re supposed to start.” “Well the first thing you need to do is get comfortable, whatever that means for you,” he began. “I sit on the floor myself although some people prefer to stand or even lie down. Whatever feels right is what you do. Once you do that, the hard part starts and that’s clearing your mind of all the stuff that’s in there. I have trouble with that especially here since there is so much noise but that type of thing won’t be bothering you although you need to stop thinking about anything else.” He looked at her and grinned. “The first time I did it, I spent about ten minutes trying to get the thought that this was ridiculous out of my head so don’t feel bad if that’s what you think. Once you do that, just focus on something, make that your main thought and just….think about it. Let yourself fall into it, make it a thought that’s pleasant at first, don’t worry about things. When you do that, you’ll find that you’ll relax, your body will feel lighter and you’ll calm down. I know it sounds like a load of bullshit but it works.” Luke hadn’t even realized that he’d picked up on some of the slang terms of this place but every now and then one slipped out. Like “bullshit.” “So... I just sit down right now and empty my mind?” Rikki asked carefully, trying to keep the skepticism at bay. That would be disrespectful, this was as much a part of their culture as anything and Luke was offering to share that with her. The fact that it also might help was an additional factor but just because he said it was okay if she thought it was bullshit didn’t mean, well, she didn’t want to be that person. But she had to admit it did sound kind of hokey. So Rikki took his suggestion and moved to take a seat on the floor. Closing her eyes she took a deep breath. Clear your mind. This was just like practice, clear out all the distractions and just focus. Empty it of all distractions. Focus on the task at hand instead of outside distractions. Except she was sitting on the floor in the middle of the training room. But that was not what she was supposed to focus on. Was this really all Anakin was doing when he sat down to meditate? He always seemed to act like it was some sort of enlightening experience. Focus, Barnes. After several minutes her eyes opened and sought Luke out. “Focusing is a lot easier when I’m hitting things.” He couldn’t help but smile. “Yes, I know. I used to feel the same way. And there are times when that isn’t a bad idea but this is something that’s coming at you from inside not outside. You can’t fight it physically, you have to fight it from the inside out.” Luke looked at her. “Now close your eyes and try again.” He knew this wasn’t easy for her, he could tell that she would much rather fight something she could see. The problem was that the things you couldn’t see were often the things that were the most harmful because they found a way inside you when you least expected it, something Luke knew only too well. The urge to huff was narrowly averted mostly by the idea of not wanting to look like a sulking child in front of Anakin’s uncle who had been pretty awesome about, well, everything so far. She would not be rude when he was only trying to help. It just seemed so simple in concept but impossible in action. Rikki’s life was movement, she had trouble sitting still. Thinking was always easier on her feet doing something, it could be anything. Even before she became a hero, before it was fighting, it was hours spent perfecting each dance move. Repetition until it was as easy as breathing. Breathe in, breathe out. It was just like dancing, just like fighting. Control your breath, focus on the way your lungs move. Maybe the involuntary voluntary, each one controlled. Rikki closed her eyes and focused. Stillness was as much about control as movement. Measure the breath, keep it slow and steady. Control yourself, control the battle. Your will is stronger than your body. Luke’s voice almost blended together with Steve’s in her mind for a moment. |