ᴀɴʏᴀ ᴄᴏʀᴀᴢᴏɴ; sᴘɪᴅᴇʀ-ɢɪʀʟ (spidergirl) wrote in thedoorway, @ 2014-08-24 12:53:00 |
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Entry tags: | !log, anya corazon / spider-girl (616), rikki barnes / nomad (616) |
Who: Rikki Barnes, Anya Corazon
When: Late last night, early this morning
Where: Brooklyn. Across from BuckyNat's brownstone.
What: Anya finally follows Rikki in her late night excursions.
Rating: PG
New York City was the city that never slept. Rikki was starting to find more in common with that than she had ever meant to. Tonight she had managed almost three hours before the nightmares had started, a cold sweat waking her up. It was all by memory now, pulling on her uniform and slipping out of the apartment. The path she took would wind around the city but Rikki always ended up in the same area. And she had no idea why, they weren’t there, it was not like she wanted to reach out to them, and she was not about to admit that she missed them. But still she was overlooking their building, taking note of any shadows that looked like they might be out of place. Lowering herself to the edge of the roof she was on, she let her legs hang over the edge as she watched the empty house across the way. Shoulders hunched Rikki let her head hang down as she forced herself to just breathe. Anya was thankful that one of her new(ish) powers was melting into those shadows. It had worked against the Ravens when she hadn't even realized it, and it worked in the Senator's office when she and Amun nearly got caught by the guard. She hadn't quite tested it on Rikki yet, because, well, friend. That seemed weird and wrong. But something was up with Rikki. Anya had noticed it a week ago, but said nothing hoping that Rikki would confide in her. Unfortunately, she hadn't, and now Anya was worried. Every night, Anya heard her best friend wake up and leave the apartment. Probably wasn't a good idea to sneak up on her, but in her slightly half-asleep haze, she didn't have a better idea. "What is this place?" Anya asked, stepping out of the shadows and placing her hand on Rikki's shoulder. Rikki had been sure she was alone. no matter the lack of sleep Rikki had made sure she hadn’t been followed, that none of whatever it was that Natasha and Bucky had warned her about were around before she had even allowed herself that split second of weakness. All of which was quickly coiled back up as she pushed herself sharp to her feet, turning and swinging before she could even properly think once her feet had solid purchase underneath her. Except all she hit was air and when she finally focused on something other than attacking Anya focused into view. But it wasn’t that she was grateful that her friend was there. An enemy Rikki could take her aggression out on, could hit until the fear dissipated and all that mattered was getting out of the scrap alive. It would discourage her from doing something stupid and staking out a house she knew was empty, would be empty, and had no idea if they were ever even going to bother coming back. “What the hell, are you following me now?” she snapped, unable to stop herself. Or maybe she was but for the moment Rikki just didn’t care. If Anya hadn't gotten her new powers, that would have been a terrible blow that would likely have doubled her over. Instead, she managed to backflip out of the way as quickly as she'd arrive. She landed on the edge, far away from Rikki, and perched there in a typical Spider-Girl pose. Her costume covered her eyes, which were nothing short of hurt. "I mean, that's kind of obvious, isn't it?" Anya frowned. "Why are you sneaking out in the middle of the night? What's going on?" “Nothing’s going on.” Rikki frowned, turning away from Anya and making sure not to look at her actual target. Instead she simply started to walk away. Her eyes darted to the different buildings, taking note of anything that could possibly be out of place. If she was still coming to watch then they were likely too. Whoever they were, Rikki hadn’t really managed to track that part down yet. Not from lack of trying but there was only so much she could do with everything else starting to take precedent. “You’re not my mother, Anya. I’m allowed to leave whenever I want. It’s not exactly sneaking out.” Anya's eyes followed the line of Rikki's shoulders as she left Anya standing there. She gaped after her friend; she didn't understand where all the hostility was coming from. But Anya wasn't the type to beg for someone to let her in, so she folded her arms across her chest, leaning back on one foot as she stood up to counter Rikki. "Nah, I'm not your mom. I'm only your best friend. How dare I care what's going on in your life. I should be ashamed of myself." Anya hopped down off the ledge. "Except I'm totally not. You can be mad at me all you want for worried about you. You're the one who looks like a big jerk. Not me." Opening up was not something Rikki did lightly, and it was something that Anya had fought hard and long for privileges to. But that didn’t change the fact that Rikki’s instincts were to lock things away, to tell as few people as possible. Even as her best friend there had been so much about Rikki’s life she had never told Anya. Because it wasn’t her place to bother her with it, because Anya might try to fix things that couldn’t be fixed. And this wasn’t something that could be fixed, she couldn’t be fixed. If it was Onslaught, if this was all just one more build up, all that could be done would be to put Rikki down like the threat to humanity she was. It had been a long time since Rikki had seen her actual mother. Since she had seen her grandmother. Hell it had been a while since even seeing Natasha, not that Rikki would make that comparison and expect to still be walking. But she had Anya. A constant between two world’s who she could lash out at, who always followed her despite that. “I’m fine.” she lied but that’s all she could really figure to do. Despite her mother dying when she was a toddler, and then her father dying, Anya was surprisingly well-adjusted for a superhero. They all have tragic backstories. Not many did this just because it was the right thing to do. She'd thought that Rikki was one of those types. You did this job because if you didn't stand up and say no, who would? Now, with everything that happened with Onslaught and her death, Anya wondered if there was more to it that her friend just wasn't telling her. "Sure. Of course." Anya rolled her eyes. "This is totally and completely fine. Next time, you should tweet about it and Instagram a picture if you're so fine. Selfie time!" “Is everything just a joke to you?” Rikki stopped, her hands balling into fists as her back tensed up. Rikki knew that her life wasn’t that awful. Honestly she had never wanted people to feel bad for her, like she was someone to be pitied. Following in Cap’s footsteps, becoming Nomad, all of it was because she truly wanted to make the world a better place, because she wanted to help people when they couldn’t help themselves. This world, honestly it was easier than she had had it in a long time. There was no reason to complain, none. But that didn’t stop the fear that kept creeping up her spine at the nightmares. It didn’t stop wanting something that she hadn’t had in a long time and would never really have again. Family was not exactly something that just happened, even if Anya was close. She had thought maybe that... which was foolish. The Black Widow and the Winter Soldier had more pressing matters to deal with. Except Onslaught was pressing, something that she shouldn’t hide but Rikki did anyway because the alternative was all too familiar and she was just simply too scared. Okay, that made Anya mad. If she took the serious route, like she had at first, she got a fist in return or nothing. If she asked what was going on, she got I'm fine. If she used sarcasm, everything was a joke. "Nuh huh, don't pin this on me. I followed you because I was worried about you." Spider-Girl huffed out through her mouth and turned to climb up on the ledge. This had been a bad idea. Maybe she should have just let Rikki suffer through whatever this was alone. It just wasn't in Anya's DNA to let someone suffer without at least trying to help, and in most cases annoying them until they wanted her to go away. For real. "But if you don't wanna talk to me, then I won't bother." When it came to Onslaught Rikki didn’t want to bring Anya in. Anya was about saving people, that was what she put everything into. But there was no saving Rikki if Onslaught was coming through, if she was just the bridge yet again for him to get into a universe that he could tear apart. Rikki loved Anya as if she was her sister but how could you ask your sister to kill you because it needed to be done? And how did you tell them that more than anything you wanted there to be some other way because you were so scared of going through that pain again, of knowing the pain of the people you would leave behind. “It’s Natasha’s house.” Rikki offered instead, her voice barely above a mumble. Because it was something but it wasn’t what she really needed to tell her. Instead it would distract her enough, honest enough without actually getting to the problem. “Or it was. I don’t think they’ll be coming back to it. I’m not even supposed to be here. They’d probably say it was undue risk or something from whoever’s after them.” Anya looked across the street for a brief instant before hopping back down off the ledge and shuffling over toward Rikki. Back across the street, Anya tried to pick out which house was Black Widow's. For all her bravado when she and Spider-Woman had teamed up with Natasha, Anya was still terrified of the spy. You just never knew what was going on in her head. She didn't understand Rikki's closeness with either her or the Winter Soldier, but then again, did anyone really understand? "Someone's after them?" Anya asked over Rikki's shoulder. She pointed at the house directly across the street, silently hoping that her own detecting skills were up to par. "Someone's always after us, but what happened?" Rikki didn’t look towards their house. It was more than she should have shared. Natasha and Bucky had trusted her with this location and now she had gone and told Anya. Nevermind that it was already compromised, her stomach sank all the same from the violation of trust they had put in her. It had meant the world to her, having that little bit of a connection to them. It was more than she had ever thought she would earn. And now maybe she hadn’t deserved it after all. “Been after them.” Rikki crossed her arms over her chest, almost as if she was cold. “Don’t point.” she added before continuing on. “Going on a few months now.” If she made it vague then maybe it wouldn’t sound like she was mentally keeping track of each day. “All I know is that one day they told me someone might be after me because of them, and then they were just off the grid. If I need something they’ll get back to me but I don’t have a clue what’s going on.” The black-clad hand dropped quickly at her side. Oops. Anya wished her costume had pockets sometimes. This being one of those times so she'd have something to do with her hands. This still didn't explain Rikki's lack of sleep. Worrying about Widow and Winter Soldier was all fine and well, but the times she left the apartment weren't consistent, and Rikki wasn't that great at lying. "That still doesn't explain the nightmares, though." Anya had heard Rikki wake up a few times in a panic, and they had definitely been getting more intense as of late. Rikki’s back tensed up again and she could feel her teeth grinding together. It wasn’t a conversation she wanted to have. All of this she wanted to avoid, she wanted to bury it deep enough that she wouldn’t have to think about it and there would be no problem. There was enough to focus on as it was. Between Jon’s assassins, Bucky and Natasha’s, the mob’s drug market finally gaining traction, along with graduating and finally getting to say she was an adult, there were more than enough problems to focus on. But none of those are world ending. None of those sent the chill along her back at remembering the details even after she woke up. “It’s nothing.” "Rikki…" Anya exhaled softly, though she was obviously not buying the it's nothing reply. There were a lot of things that could trigger nightmares, and a lot of things to have nightmares about. Rikki'd had a lot of terrible crap happen to her in their world, and maybe not quite as bad here, but those things lingered. They haunted you, unless you were able to figure out a way to put them behind you. Anya tossed her arms over the back of Rikki's shoulders. "I know it's not nothing. You're putting on a costume and doing god knows what. You don't have to talk to me if you don't want to, but I'm here if you want to." Instinctively Rikki reached up and reached her hands over Anya’s arms. She was warm, solid, and it was nice to have comfort even when she never seemed to actually seek it out. Because she couldn’t take about it. The need was outweighed for the moment and Rikki hated herself that fear was so easy to fall into. She had always thought of herself as brave, throwing herself into situations that no one else would. But this was something different. Maybe it was even nothing. “Thanks.” she said quietly, not offering up anymore. But she was grateful. If Anya was gone too, well, Rikki wasn’t ready to be completely alone again. Ugh, it always sucked when someone didn't want to talk, especially when you offered. It kind of felt like one of those tiny slaps in the face, like I don't trust you enough to talk about this. Still, Anya knew that if there was anyone that Rikki was going to talk to, it would be her. Rikki was the best friend that Anya had ever had. She'd been able to share every facet of herself with the other girl, which was a first, even with Superhero Registration. Anya slipped her other arm over Rikki's hands until they were all tangled up together. "Do you ever watch their house with pizza? 'Cause pizza sounds really good right now." |