Credence Barebone Potter (obscurence) wrote in thedisplaced, @ 2018-02-01 16:24:00 |
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Entry tags: | !log/thread, credence barebone, emmeline vance |
log; credence & emmeline
Who: Emmeline Vance & Credence Barebone
When: Morning of January 18th or thereabouts
Where: Breakfast on the ship!
What: Emmeline & Credence have their weekly lunch at breakfast instead.
Rating: Pretty general audiences, but some talk of anxiety, and vague illusions to not so great past family experiences.
Status: COMPLETE.
It might be a lie to say that Credence Barebone was getting used to the ship, but he had settled a bit. There was still the feeling of being confined, and if he thought about it, there could be a creeping anxiety about the fact that he was so confined and if he let things get out of control what might happen. But it was easier than space had been. It felt somewhat less acute for one thing, and for the other, Credence was in a different place than he'd been when they'd ended up in space. In the past year he'd figured out some things about himself and made friends and felt as if he had a family. In the past year as well he'd learned magic, and he'd gotten a wand that seemed to work really well, and he'd gained a Hogwarts house. Well, he hadn't quite gained a Hogwarts House technically, but so far as he was concerned, and Albus was concerned, and everyone around him would know, he had. One of those friends was Emmeline Vance, and she was the one whose birthday idea had given him that Hogwarts House, and she was one who'd helped him learn magic, and this morning he was meeting her for breakfast. Thankfully, not too early of one, as he managed to get up and get himself dressed from the closet of clothes they'd provided. It was all his new clothing - whatever had provided it here, it was as if it had known that he didn't want any of the stuff he'd worn back in the 20s, or the things he'd worn over the first year here. He slid on a pair of the jeans, a button up, a vest, and a tie that could have been his house colors, and combed his hair, before he headed out to meet Emmeline. Emmeline did her best to relax while they were on the cruise ship, but sometimes it was difficult. As paranoid as it made everyone seem, she was good to have protocols and plans forming in case of an emergency. Emmeline was used to it back home, and it made her feel useful to be involved. It wasn’t always easy for her relax, especially when something was on her mind, but did her best. She had to admit that the ship wasn’t too bad, it was certainly nice looking and she liked the bars and resting by the pool. Emmeline was also keeping up with traditions, such as meeting Credence. Whether it was breakfast or lunch, she enjoyed catching up with him and happy to have something stable in her life. They decided to meet this morning for breakfast, she was already up early so she showed up a few minutes before they were supposed to meet. She found a spot and went ahead and made her there was something to drink for Credence when he showed up. Credence greeted Emmeline with a smile that was a lot more ready than during their early meetings. Some of the nervousness that had seemed to hang around him as a garment had floated away as he'd become more certain that he wouldn't be shunned for who he was. And while he still wasn't greeting anyone with 'Oh, yeah, I'm an Obscurus', he knew now, or he was beginning to know, that there were some people who were going to be there for him, and it was empowering. So his shoulders were a little straighter, and it wasn't just the new clothing. He was beginning to maybe feel his age, instead of like a child who had to be handed everything. And while there was still quite a bit about this world, and this time, that was unfamiliar to him, he felt he had a place, and that was a huge piece of him feeling more confident. "Good morning," he slid into the seat and reached for the menu. "Have you ordered?" “Morning, Credence.” Emmeline said cheerfully as he took a seat. “I ordered a couple of drinks. They had some amazing fruit juice options, smoothies and I guessed on which one I think you’d might like.” They’ve had lunch and sometimes breakfast dates for months now and she hoped that during that time she was able to get a clue on what Credence enjoyed. “Hopefully I got it right,” she added. “They’re supposed to be amazing and give you a good boost to start off the day.” Now that he was sitting, she was able to take in Credence’s new style. She had noticed over time that his confidence was building. This new style certainly showed it and it nearly made her glow with pride. Even though Emmeline had a little sister, it had been so long since anyone brought out that ‘motherly’ instinct in her. Emmeline wasn’t sure if she ever wanted children, but Credence certainly came close and she was perfectly fine with that. “I like the new look. Has a bit of that style from your time, doesn’t it?” Credence's cheeks flushed but there was a smile on his face at the complement as he glanced down and he nodded. "A bit, yeah." He'd realized, although it had taken him actually looking through things with Albus, that he could have a very different look, one that reminded him of all the smart men that had frequently just walked past him without seeing him, and still managed to be timely and current for this moment. And despite the fact that it wasn't a three piece suit, he suspected he could still be dropped in New York at home and be taken more seriously than he had been before in clothing from the 1920s, although he likely attributed that more to the clothing and less to the confidence that he had gained even if it was the latter that would likely have made him stand out. "Albus helped me with it," he added, credit where it should be due, as he reached for the menu. "Juice still feels so splendid. We never had it at home." Emmeline nodded. “He does dress well. Going with the Slytherin colours, I see too.” She grinned. It did make her happy to see Credence embrace the stories he was told about Hogwarts. In reality he would have gone to Ilvermorny, but having everyone teach him about Hogwarts felt more like accepting him into their family. Which, he already was, but having the sorting ceremony really felt like a family affair. It was one of the main reasons she came up with the idea in the first place, and Albus was brilliant in helping planning everything out. “Glad you get a chance to treat yourself then.” She smiled. “You seem better, Credence. Not just the confidence, but look happy.” Credence grinned a little bit. "Thanks for the sorting," he told her as he reached for the juice she'd given him. "It was the best present." Even if he'd never get to go to Hogwarts, and he knew he wouldn't. He was too old and of course at home he wasn't even in England. Had he gone to a school it would have been a different one, but so many of the people here had gone to Hogwarts, and it made him feel included. "Yeah, I'm," he glanced down and smoothed his vest with his free hand. "I like the green." Mostly, truthfully, he liked the fact that he'd got sorted into Albus' house. It made him feel like he really was a part of Albus' family, even if he wasn't. And while most of Albus' family wasn't Slytherin, Albus was - and that was the important piece to Credence. And he was happy. Happier than he'd been for longer than he could remember. It had the effect of making the Obscurus that was there feel smaller, and less frightening. In the moment he could almost forget any concern he had about breaking out and destroying an important part of the ship and drowning everyone. The reality might still be there, but it seemed much less likely. He sat the juice down and nodded at her words. "I think I am happy," he said. "I have a wand that works and my magic feels stronger. It's good, I think." “I’m glad it was a success.” She smiled at him. Emmeline also decided not to mention that she probably reached her peak in terms of birthday presents. It was probably the best idea she had ever come up with and she doubted she could come up with something better in the years to come. Birthday presents wasn’t always a strong suit of hers, hell back home she was lucky if she could remember. It was easier during her Hogwarts’ days, but once the work of an Auror took over, she had a hard time keeping her days straight. “The green suits you. Looks like it worked out to be a Slytherin then, eh?” Emmeline nodded in reply. “That’s good.” She was glad he was able to count his blessing, the good things in his life. It wasn’t always easy, she knew that personally, and it was inspiring to see someone like Credence succeed. “How are you doing with the cruise? Are you able to enjoy yourself here?” "I like being in the same house as Albus," he admitted. "Even if it's not exactly real. It still makes me feel like I'm part of… well, like I belong there." Albus and Helena and Luna felt like family, and if he hadn't been in Slytherin, he suspected he would have wanted Ravenclaw, like Luna, but he didn't think he was probably smart enough for Ravenclaw. Luna saw things completely different than he did, and he didn't think he would ever come close to being able to do that. "I think so," he put the glass down and frowned. "If I think about it too much I still worry. What if someone frustrates me too much, or something happens," his brow furrowed slightly, his eyes on the juice in the cup. "It's not impossible still, but I do feel like I had more control than before, and maybe this isn't quite as dire feeling as space. I'm trying to breathe, and enjoy some things. I just don't want to accidentally ruin it for anyone." He'd had explosions before, some literal ones with the gas station in Tumbleweed, and it had caused a stir although he didn't know to what extent much of Tumbleweed even knew that it was him. He'd like it if they never did, but he supposed it was possible some did. Emmeline did her best to give him a reassuring smile. “Slytherin’s not a bad house. Don’t let my bias ruin that, obviously with someone like Albus being in a Slytherin, that shows that there’s good and bad everywhere. And you-” she stared him. “Are not bad. Even if it’s not a real sorting, you absolutely belong here with us. We’ve claimed you. In Albus’ mind, you’re his kid. And I guess that makes me the weird aunt or mother that lives down the street.” She laughed a little and shrugged. As he spoke, she frowned, but nodded. She understood that fear, even if Emmeline had confidence in Credence, it’s always a small fear of the ‘what-if?’ and she understood that Credence would have that fear as well. “I wish I could say that it’s impossible. My best advice is not to focus on if it could happen, but to add that we have plans if something does happen. Remind yourself that you know the steps to take, we’ll keep everyone safe, and we’ll keep you safe.” She paused. “I know it’s harder to do on the ship, but doing your meditation lessons will actually help, and there’s plenty of room on the ship for that.” Credence nodded, smoothing down his vest a little anxiously. He realized there was so much about things he didn't understand, but there were some things he'd gathered. Slytherins weren't always trusted, although he couldn't figure why if they were like Albus. Maybe not all of them were. It didn't matter to Credence so long as he could be a little bit like Albus. He'd never really had a father figure in his life, and Albus had stepped in and been willing to help him, to guide him and Credence wanted to make him proud. Somehow it felt as if this might have done it. "I'd like to be Albus' kid," he glanced up with a shy smile. "I know I'm not, but I'd like to think that I am, sometimes." It was easy to do, even if sometimes it felt too good to be true. "I'd like you to be my mother," this was also said shyly. "You aren't -" he stopped, feeling that he shouldn't speak too terribly ill of his Ma, but at the same time. "You make me feel like I can do things. And I think that's how a Mother is supposed to be." He reached for the juice again. "I have been doing meditation lessons though. I think they're helping. I hope so." There were many things that was apparent to Emmeline, it wasn’t easy to hide much from her and such observations had already lead Emmeline to believe that she was in fact like a mother to Credence. Not once had Emmeline ever thought of herself as a mother to anyone, and yet the moment she was introduced to Credence it came so naturally that she didn’t have a moment of second guessing. It didn’t scare her as she thought motherhood would, and perhaps that’s because it wasn’t quite the same standard you see with typical families. Maybe that’s why it worked so well. As Credence spoke, she couldn’t help but smile. Emmeline had to remind herself they were having breakfast and while her eyes watered, she was determined not to cry. “Thank you, Credence.” Thankfully her voice didn’t crack and she was able to keep it stable. “That means a great deal to me, and you never have to wonder if I love you like a son, because I do.” With her mouth dry, she copied Credence and reached for her own glass. She nodded, swallowing her juice before she answered. “Good! That’s real good. There’s also an option of going to one of the powered people where they do a lot of mind work. I don’t know how much it’d help, and I can’t remember if we had anyone like Charles Xavier talk to you, but it’s possible they could sense something about the Obscurous that may help. I’ll leave that up to you, and Albus if he thinks it’s a good idea.” It was still difficult for Credence to trust new people. He'd never been able to before reaching Tumbleweed, but once he had arrived there had been Albus and Emmeline and Nico and Luna and others that had helped him with his secrets and helped him. And he truly felt as if they wanted him to be happy, not just wanted him to be 'safe', which was a new feeling that he didn't know if he could entirely trust. Reaching out to new people, or working with them on things like the Obscurus, was therefore, difficult for him, but he nodded, seriously. "I could to talk to Albus," he said tentatively. "I wish that - Well, I wish Newt were still here." Newt had seemed to know the most about the Obscurus as anyone did, and while Luna had picked up on some things easily, like the fact that the Obscurus seemed to be echoing the spells he did when he was tired, she wasn't an expert in magical creatures like Newt. And maybe nobody was an expert in an Obscurus because mostly they hadn't been studied, and he knew he was older than most, but he couldn't help but think Newt might be able to help as well. "I think he could help with the obscurus maybe." Emmeline nodded. “Up to you.” Catching on to his hesitation. “I say right now we’re doing fine and getting a lot of work done on our own.” She smiled and shrugged casually. “Figured it couldn’t hurt to at least have that option out there, just in case.” “I know.” Emmeline added a moment later. “I wish Newt was here as well. I think he’d be really interested and proud with what you’ve accomplished in the time he’s been gone. It’d be good to pick his brain about this, and I’m sure it’d give you some comfort as well.” Credence nodded, feeling a bit of relief at not having to talk to someone - specifically someone he didn't know so very well - just yet. Maybe he would want to do that eventually. He probably would even, but he could work up to it. He didn't have to do it now. And maybe he wouldn't even have to. "It's good to have the option," he said politely. Because it was true - even if it wasn't something that he would necessarily be excited about doing. "It would, but he isn't, so we'll just have to muddle on," Credence shrugged. "Mostly I feel as if it's fine. When I do magic regularly, the Obscurus feels… less powerful? Or hungry? I'm not certain how to describe it exactly, but that's the best I can think of it. I worry that I'm not being worried enough, but it doesn't feel like a problem so much most of the time, except when I'm tired or anxious maybe." Understanding, Emmeline nodded and didn’t press the issue. It was just as much of Credence’s right to have a say as it was anyone helping him. Emmeline would leave it there, and would be ready to help if the situation changed. “Hm. It is good to be cautious but not too worried to the point where it’s all you think about. That sort of thinking takes a lot of practice. I wont say don’t be worried, I want you to try and focus more on what brings you happiness and joy, and if you need to take some time to worry.” She paused for a moment. “A few suggestions for the worries, is to perhaps keep a journal. That way they aren’t festering in your mind all day long. You write it down. As for the anxiety-” She breathed. “There are people who are more well equipped to handle individuals with anxiety. I had to deal with it back home after I lost people. Again it might end up meaning you have to talk to someone new, I’d suggest talking to Albus about your anxiety and see what other suggestions he may have. If you decide you want to speak to someone, I’m fairly certain you’re allowed to have Albus or I there with you, that way you’re more comfortable.” "The journal's a good idea," Credence said quietly. He wouldn't have thought of that alone, but it seemed like it might work. He'd never kept one before, he'd always been afraid of what might happen if the things he thought were found out by his mother. But Mary Lou Barebone wasn't here and couldn't see his journal, and Emmeline, Albus, Luna - they weren't the sort that even if they found it that they would even look, and if they did… he didn't think they'd be put off. A year was showing him that they seemed to trust him. "I could talk to someone if I needed to," he said, although he might have been trying to convince himself. "I don't know if it would help though." “It’s something I did for a while, even now and again I’ll write something down, especially before bed.” She sighed. “Sometimes my mind wont slow down enough for me to fall asleep, so this is a good way to sort out my thoughts and put any worries at ease, at least set them aside to focus on later.” Emmeline knew that for Credence, trust didn’t come easily. It was why she started feeling so protective of him right away. It made her even more furious though, when she thought of what his homelife could have been like for him to end up this way. Yes, there was the Obscurous issue, but it was more than that. It gave Emmeline a strong urge to hex anyone from his home that caused him emotional and physical harm. If they ever showed up here, Merlin help them. “You never know. It’d be good to talk to Albus about it, go over options,” she replied, giving him an encouraging smile. “Now I don’t know about you, but I’m starving and that breakfast buffet looks amazing.” |