Gareth is seated in his chair as the camera flicks on, straight backed and formal as usual with a polite smile on his face. Those who know him well, however, will be able to spot his "tells" that demonstrate that he isn't entirely comfortable with the situation, that may be mistaken for contentment by others - the sides of his mouth pull straight as he smiles, his eyes look straight forward and don't move, and he subconsciously cracks his first and second fingers by pushing down on them with his thumb. His hands are held together neatly on his knee.
INTERVIEWER: How hard is it moving from being single to being married in the space of two months?
Oh, not very, I would say. When you are fortunate enough to have found the right person to spend your life with, the changes that occur from living a single life to a married one aren't actually difficulties at all.
What does your wife think of your ex-girlfriends?
She doesn't work with any exes and wasn't at school with them, so she doesn't know them.
Gareth is being his usual polite self, but the sharper viewers will have noticed that he is rather deftly - although Gareth would say diplomatically - not *strictly* answering the question in the spirit in which it was asked. By sticking to the letter of the question, however, he hasn't made things difficult for the interviewer. Yet.
Do you find your relationship distracts you from work?
We work in different departments, so not at all. (Charming smile)
Even the less sharp of the viewers or onlookers may have noticed by now that Gareth seems to be purposefully keeping his answers short and to the point. Obtuseness, or protecting his family? YOU DECIDE, FOLKS.
How has your family reacted to your marriage?
They're delighted that we are happy, and they like her. My brother would probably tell you that the only thing that disappoints him is the lack of a stag party. (Quiet half-chuckle.)
Gareth shifts in his seat and crosses his leg, just enough of the infamous flag socks showing when the camera cuts to a full length shot. As it does so, the interviewer looks cheery in an Effie Trinket manner, having not yet noticed how well Gareth is playing the game.
Do any of them disapprove?
(Calmly) Not at all. They adore her as much as I do.
Do any of hers disapprove?
That would be a question better suited for her, wouldn't it? (Raises eyebrows slowly) But, no, they don't.
Have you both been checked out for STDs?
Most unlike himself - and to the surprise of the interviewer who jumps ever so slightly - Gareth actually eye rolls at this question. The calmness on his face shows that he was expecting tough questions, but the stern way in which he replies shows his disdain for it.
Oh, *please*. Any sensible, responsible adult takes as good care of their sexual health as everything else. That's a stupid question.
The interviewer frowns slightly, as even she has, by now, caught on to what viewers caught on to several questions earlier. She looks down at the clipboard of questions and gulps out the next one in almost a tiny voice.
What kind of contraception are you using right now?
(Sighs quietly in a somewhat exasperated fashion, speaking slowly as if to a child who doesn't understand something. Despite his annoyance, he is actually rather kind and gentle now that he has gathered himself.)
That is a personal and private medical question. I believe those more adept at slang would say "TMI"...
How many kids do you plan on having?
For the first time in the interview, Gareth visibly relaxes and even genuinely smiles. It's clear that he is restraining himself slightly in his answers, but it's through the necessity of not gabbling rather than terseness. The interviewer looks slightly relieved as he speaks.
(Chuckles) Well, we do both want children, but we haven't quite decided on how many yet. I mean, looking after other people's children is one thing - remember that DMAC was the only department that came off lightly on Bring Your Child to Work Day? Having your own and being responsible for them for the whole time is quite another. We've said we want a lot, but then, we might have one and decide that the parenting experience is satisfying enough just with him or her. Everyone's different in that manner, I suppose.
How soon will you be having them?
Gareth smirks, but there is an almost coy expression behind his eyes - something only those who see him on a regular basis will recognise for exactly what it is.
Oh, that's another question you can never really answer with certainty, isn't it? Luck, and all that...