Rab fidgeted quietly for a moment, trying to figure out exactly how to explain his reasons.
"I, I need to prove myself." He finally admitted, not looking over at his friend. "I need Rod, my family to know that I can be who they want me to be. I've been practicing curses, and, and Dark Magic my whole life, but if I never u, use it, I might as well not know any. I, I want them to be proud of me.'