Monday, August 1st, 2005

Time	Event
12:21a	Even The Old can wonder I Know this land.. This place that all of you keep talking about a place so perfect that even angels would cry to get in.. Angels are nothing more then that of what you make of them.. Those beings are the same who betrayed the creator when the battle of Satan came.. There are light angles of purity and good and dark angels who became the monsters of this earth but are they not born of the same creator? The same thought created both good and evil.. The balance is something I have always lived my life by.. You can’t have good without evil…. You can’t have order without chaos.. Too much of one always kills the affect you are trying to cause… To much order leads to chaos.. Why because people and minds don’t like to be controlled. it’s the same with free will and destiny. Our choices help us choose who we are in our destiny.. They say in free will everyone has a choice.. Then why not the same in destiny? Pre decided fate is everyone’s argument.. Isn’t that the same as free will.. A choice to choose what can happen.. Or you act without thinking.. Did someone mess with your made and make you choose that just by sheer influence… Or did they just choose that because you were going to pick that one anyways? I myself am a chaos/ order guardian.. I believe you can’t have one without the other.. And I will do anything in the world to keep the scales tipped in an equal balance.. Im constantly running around trying to keep the scales to a point that they can operate.. Many a times im late to get there before it happens.. But there is only a few number of us left.. Guardians can protect things that are none physical.. Like guardian angels.. They protect the living.. Well who protects the balance? Sometimes even the angel’s need help. I started this group.. To start a place that guardians left out in the world.. Who were just started to waken to this calling that you truly belong to some greater purpose in this world.. Could come and stay and get advice on handling.. The hurt and the pain. And anything else that comes with being a guardian.. The prophetic dreams.. Or the hurt of being alone.. Even when someone is holding you close.. This is to be a support group. But everyone seems to not know what to say.. Do you have any questions? Any hopes? Any issues to not hold within to keep your hearts discontents down to a low murmur.. that’s another thing.. Guardians now seem to be quiet afraid to show.. What happens when a guardian is quiet? Their unheard prays go unspoken.. So speak I pray you.. The oldest here.. *raises her hand* will not reprimand you.. Just come to your senses and let your true nature breath.. The Lady.. Current Mood: restless (Comment on this)
1:55p	What is it that I wan't to shout out into the open that I think no one would listen to... well this is it... you asked... Why is it the ones I am surrounded by have to be so damn cryptic... why do I have to find out everything thing the hard way... what ever happened to being blunt and just speaking your feelings. I swear, I try to do my best to protect those around me but to what purpose... they hide more then what they tell me and when I try to help it only hurts them... I don't know which way to turn at times... I can't not make someone happy without upsetting another. It is becoming that endless spiral that we all know well. I know there is a balance to everything, good with evil and so on and so forth. But I have yet to be able to tell in which way the balance is tipping... I want everything to keep in balance... but it is hard to tell where the balance is at times. I know I am young at being a guardian, and there are others watching me while I am doing this to make sure I don't mess things up to badly... but they don't tell me when I mess up or what I should have done better... I can't learn from my mistake unless I know what my mistake was. Even though it is frustrating at times I will not give up... I will stay on my path that I have chosen or better yet, the path that was set in front of me... I just want to know what I can do to tell where the balance is?? Is there anyway of truely knowing?? Current Mood: confused (2 Comments | Comment on this)

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