Never Could Keep A Secret Who: Gabe and Claire When: Evening Where: Gabe’s house
The festival had been plenty of fun, and admittedly, Claire had never seen The Wizard of Oz, so the movie was a bit of a treat as well. It felt normal to just hang around with Gabe and not worry about school, or work... or poisonous bats - if that’s what they were, anyway. At some point after the movie, Claire and Gabe headed back to Gabe’s house to hang out for awhile, like they had planned. That was when the nerves had kicked in hardcore, and Claire had to resist chewing on her fingernails as they walked back to his house. The nerves weren’t a bad thing, though. They were more like butterflies, flitting around in her stomach in anticipation of... well, something. Being alone with Gabe again, she supposed. Considering they had been friends for years, and had essentially grown up together, Claire knew there was no reason to feel awkward or out of sorts, and in a way, she didn’t. It was just a shift in their friendship, and Claire knew once a certain line was crossed, things would change.
“I had a lot of fun,” Claire said, once they got to his house. She glanced at him with a grin. “I’m impressed you survived the day after your night out last night.”
While Gabe wanted more than anything to tell Claire about what happened with Ren, he knew that would ruin the evening. Getting it off his chest was for his own benefit, not hers, and so he kept it to himself and instead allowed them to enjoy the movie. It was such a good night that he didn’t even want to bring it up afterwards, when they were heading back to his house, a chance to spend some time alone together. They’d spent plenty of time alone together over the years, but not like this, not when he’d asked her as a date.
“I didn’t drink too much,” Gabe laughed. “Plus, I got to sleep in. It would have been worse if I’d had to get up and go work or go to class.” In fact, he might have skipped. He hadn’t had a huge hangover, but he’d been exhausted nonetheless. “I didn’t realize you’d never seen The Wizard of OZ. What was your favorite part?”
"There's probably a lot of movies I haven't seen," Claire admitted a bit sheepishly. "But I think my favorite part was when the Wizard gave them what they wanted from his bag. Cheesy, but whatever, it was sweet. I liked the whole thing though. And it makes me wonder what other movies they might show later." Going to the movies seemed like a 'date' kind of thing to do too, so that was another reason to look forward to it. "The festival was a lot of fun though. Kind of nice to do something everyone could take part in and enjoy." Claire sort of felt like she was rambling, and she force herself to stop before she started getting redundant just to try and mask her nervousness.
“I like the witch melting.” He wasn’t sure why that part amused him so much, though it could be the idea that a monster could be fended off with water. “Hopefully they’ll have a good selection,” he smiled, also looking forward to seeing movies with Claire in the future. “Would you be up for seeing more with me?” He was pretty sure she’d say yes, but it still felt right to ask. “I don’t know why we don’t do things like the festival more often. I think we all need it, something to enjoy. Last night I told Avery that we should have a party, just the high schoolers, since we’ve missed out on so much.” If she was rambling, then so was he, enjoying the walk back to his house, his hand in hers.
It seemed silly for him to ask, because her answer was more than obvious, but at the same time, the simple question had her heart beating a little faster. "Of course I would go see more movies with you," Claire said. "I think we can manage sitting still and keeping our mouths shut for a couple hours every now and then." She squeezed his hand gently. "A party? That might give us something to do besides going to school and work. You think your mom would let you do that? Or did Avery offer up her place?" It might not even be something written in stone, but Claire had to admit the idea of being forced to socialize was tempting. It would be good for her have to meet and talk to people who weren't Gabe and Ren, although if Claire had her way, she would only ever spend time with them. More so Gabe, but she couldn't very well say that.
Gabe could think of a way they could be quiet for a couple of hours, but that didn’t involve watching a movie. In fact, he was pretty sure he’d miss the whole thing if he had Claire distracting him, but he couldn’t very well say that when he hadn’t even kissed her yet. He intended to, though, as soon as the time was right. “I was thinking maybe something outdoors. Maybe down by one of the lakes. That way we don’t trash anyone’s house.” He didn’t think his mother would be pleased with him having a huge house party, and Avery hadn’t offered her place for probably the same reason. He wasn’t sure who she lived with, but there were a number of O’Rielly’s in town. It could be any of them. “Do you think I could pull it together by next weekend?”
That was probably a good idea, having it outside where there was no risk of a house getting destroyed, or things broken. Plus, if the weather was nice, hanging out by the lake would probably be pretty fun. "I'm guessing you could pull it together with no problem," she said, giving him a smile. "And I bet the people we go to school with would jump at the chance to experience a real party in a heartbeat. What better way to get a reputation for the guy who throws the badass parties?" she teased. It wasn't like they would get so rowdy they would all get in trouble, right? And, of course, Claire was letting her mind wander ahead to being able to hang out with Gabe in the midst of it. As something more than a friend. The thought was something she was still trying to get used to.
“Well, I hope it would be a badass party, but it could just as easily turn out to be a lame-ass party,” Gabe smiled. It was a reputation he might enjoy, if given the chance. Gabe loved having friends around and parties were even better. And people would also get to see him with Claire, which he liked for some reason. He liked the idea of people knowing she was his. Apparently he was just a tad possessive. “I’ll start planning then,” he said, walking up to the front of his house, searching for the key. “And if I have any ideas that are too crazy, you tell me, so I don’t get myself in trouble. Deal?” he asked, opening the door and ushering them inside.
“My definition of crazy might not be your definition of crazy,” Claire pointed out with a small laugh. “But if you suggest something that screams potential trouble, I promise to let you know.” She would, of course, use Thessaly as reference. If Claire thought his mom would be super pissed? That would be Claire’s definition of too crazy. Claire stepped into Gabe’s house, comfortable enough to immediately toe her shoes off by the front door, just as she had done a hundred times before. “You know, I’m kind of wishing you had done that bachelor auction this afternoon,” she said after a brief moment. “I think it would have been kind of fun to bid on you in front of everyone.” Claire told herself it was because she wanted to help out the orphanage, but really, there was a small part of her that kind of wanted to show everyone that Gabe was maybe, possibly hers.
Sometimes Gabe needed someone level headed around him. When he’d wanted to go hunt zombies, Ren was all over it, while Claire kept them from getting themselves killed. Things that sometimes seemed like brilliant ideas at the time were not always so. Gabe knew she wouldn’t spoil the fun, but would likely stop him from getting hurt or worse. “Really?” Gabe asked, a little surprised by this. It made him wonder if she would have bid on him if he’d not told her, or if she’d have been willing to risk someone outbidding her. “I don’t think I could have handled it if you’d have lost,” Gabe said, taking her hand and pulling her closer to him as he spoke. “I would have been throwing money to you, just so you could bid high enough.”
Silly how something so simple as Gabe pulling her close got her heart racing. Then again maybe it wasn't as simple as she thought. Smiling, Claire stepped in close, not really wanting to let go of his hand. "You know me, I'm pretty frugal with money. I probably would have spent it all at the auction if I had to bid against someone for you, even if you hadn't asked me out. I would have just told myself that I was saving you from a potentially awkward date." And even now, knowing what she knew, Claire wouldn't have wanted to share him. Odd how she felt a bit possessive when they hadn't even gone on a real date yet.
“I wish I had known sooner,” Gabe said softly, smiling as he looked down at Claire. He wished he had had time to think about it, process it, and accept it before he’d kissed Ren. A part of him hadn’t quite believed her, not until he’d asked Claire himself, and he couldn’t keep the thought from his mind that he should tell her what happened. He’d much rather head back to his room and try kissing Claire, but instead he thought maybe they should talk first. “Would you like some pie? I bought an apple pie from the diner in town.”
Claire wasn't sure she would have had the courage to tell him sooner. Technically, she hadn't told him now, Ren had. Sort of. But if this is what came from it, Claire couldn't be upset. At that moment, Claire was feeling a butterfly inducing sense of anticipation. With how close they were to one another, and the topic of their discussion, Claire was thinking Gabe was going to kiss her. She was remembering everything Ren had described to her when it came to first kisses, and Claire suddenly realized everything Ren had said was true. She knew it and Gabe hadn't even made a move yet. But then he asked about pie, and Claire exhaled softly before smiling. Okay, maybe not just yet. "Sure. It's been awhile since we ate."
That tiny flash of disappointment was all it took for Gabe to realize he’d made the wrong move. Maybe he should have kissed her when he had the chance. Maybe she’d be so upset that he’d have missed the only chance he had. Pie was nothing compared to kissing Claire, he was positive, but he felt like the weight on his shoulders prevented him from moving forward as he wanted. Gabe gave her a little smile and rested his forehead against hers for just a second or two, his eyes closing briefly. He couldn’t remember ever being this angry with himself and there was nothing he could do about it. “Sorry,” he said, squeezing her hand as he pulled away. “I don’t know what I’m doing.”
Sure, she felt disappointment but it wasn't anything that Claire figured would linger. They were spending time together and Claire was enjoying herself. She knew that first kiss would come eventually, and while Claire had never been a romantic, she knew it would happen when it was meant to. Her smile softened when Gabe rested his forehead against hers, because the closeness was nice. It was kind of amazing that she had no idea what it was she really needed until it was right there in front of her. Her eyes opened when Gabe pulled back, and while she continued to smile, Claire's brows drew together in mild confusion. "What do you mean?" He didn't know what he was doing? Did he mean with her? Or in general? One comment sent her thoughts spinning, but she figured he would clarify it for her.
“I just... made a big mistake before I asked you out. And now I keep worrying about it, that you’ll find out, or that you won’t want to date me anymore, and we haven’t even been on a date! And I keep thinking that I shouldn’t tell you, but then I feel like that’s distracting me from being with you. So is it better that I keep something a secret that might hurt you? Because it doesn’t effect how I feel about you,” Gabe rambled on, stopping only to catch a breath. “So I thought pie. Because... if you left after pie, I could handle that.” But not after a kiss. If she ran out after he kissed her, Gabe didn’t know what he’d do.
While Gabe spoke, Claire's smile faded as confusion, and maybe a small sense of dread, deepened. It was one thing for him to say he had made a mistake about something, but it was evident by his words that whatever mistake he had made would affect her somehow. Could it really have been so bad that he thought she might run off? If it was that bad, did she really want to know? The butterflies in her stomach gave away to mild nausea and Claire studied Gabe's face, wishing she could just tell him not to tell her, to keep whatever mistake he'd made a secret so they could just have some pie and hang out for the rest of the night. Kissing didn't even have to happen. But her heart was pounding now and Claire thought maybe she was a glutton for punishment. "What happened?" she asked, trying to sound calm even she didn't feel it inside.
He hated that he’d managed to chase away any trace of happiness from her features. Why couldn’t he just keep the secret? Was it really that hard? Keeping this secret felt like lying to her and he didn’t want to do that. Gabe opened his mouth to tell her, then swallowed it back. It had been easy enough to tell Avery, but this was Claire. Telling Avery didn’t hurt her. “I kissed Ren,” he blurted out. “We were talking about first kisses and how awkward they can be, and that it would be nice to get that out of the way. She suggested it and I agreed because I didn’t really think you were interested. Maybe I should’ve known, but sometimes it was so hard to tell. And I didn’t really have time to think about it like I did later and... I wish it had been you.”
Out of everything Claire braced herself for, Gabe kissing Ren was completely unexpected. She almost asked him to stop talking because her mind was still trying to wrap itself around the I kissed Ren part. All Claire could hear as Gabe rambled on was I kissed Ren. Because first kisses were awkward and Ren suggested getting theirs out of the way. With each other. But that wasn't right, because Ren didn't mention anything about awkwardness when Claire admitted her uncertainty about kissing Gabe. She mentioned butterflies, and smiling and perfection. Of course she had, because Ren already knew what it was like. None of it really made sense just yet, and Claire took a step back, just for a little bit of distance to absorb everything. Claire swallowed and kept her eyes on his face. "So... was it awkward then? Your first kiss together?" Since apparently that's why they had decided to do it. To get those awkward first kisses out of the way. Only, how would they know if first kisses were awkward, if they'd never experienced one before? Claire wasn't sure how to feel, but she supposed once her mind cleared, she would figure it out.
Gabe watched her nervously, the knotting in his stomach getting worse with each second. Now he was glad this wasn’t technically a date. This kind of discussion didn’t belong in a date. He just hoped there might still be one in the future. “I dunno,” he shrugged. “It was good and it was bad.” It might hurt Ren’s feelings to know, but he couldn’t associate a happy memory with the guilt he’d ended up with afterwards. He’d gotten carried away and regretted it. It wasn’t even that it was Ren, though he had the feeling it made things worse for Claire. They lived together. “It’s not a memory I want to keep,” he said finally, hoping that she’d understand that, even if it would likely stick with him.
Good and bad. It was mean of Claire to wish it has just been bad? Because Ren was her best friend too. But now she knew they had shared something that Claire thought, despite rolling her eyes at most things having to do with relationships or romance, was supposed to be special or something. Like sex. You always remembered your first, right? She was aware that she was probably reading too much into this. Gabe didn't belong to her, and this had happened before he asked her out. But still. It was Ren. Her other best friend, and whether Claire would admit it or not, the girl she always felt a little inadequate next to. But it seemed like Gabe was genuinely regretful about it, which helped lessen her hurt feelings a bit. Only, it didn’t really make sense that Gabe and Ren would have kissed without Ren telling Claire, since they told each other almost everything. It was a big deal, wasn't it? They were all close, and kisses between two of them seemed like a Big Thing. Claire was lost in thought for a few moments before her gaze ticked away, then back to Gabe's face. "Wait...when?" Claire realized she hadn't asked that and she had been thinking this happened awhile ago. Because Ren wouldn't kiss Gabe if she had known Claire liked him, right? And Gabe wouldn’t have kissed Ren if he liked Claire, and knew she liked him back. Right? Everything jumbled together in confusion again and Claire's heart started thumping faster in her chest as she stared at Gabe intently. "When did it happen?"
“Umm, a few days ago?” Gabe said, worriedly watching Claire. “Before I asked you out, but it was kinda what made me realize I should.” He didn’t know how to explain it, except for the fact that he wanted more than kissing. He had chemistry with Ren, but it wasn’t the same as when he was around Claire. “It wasn’t technically my first kiss,” Gabe admitted. “I kissed Harmony Fletcher on the playground in fifth grade. We dated, which meant we held hands on occasion.” He didn’t know if this would make Claire feel better or not, but if she was concerned about his first kiss, he wanted to let her know there had been one before. Maybe that made it worse. “I don’t know what I was thinking,” he said, running his hand through his hair. “I’m sorry.”
A few days ago. There was an undeniable sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach, because that meant Ren had known then, that Claire liked Gabe. Her gaze lowered to the ground, because honestly, she didn't know what to say. No, it didn't really make her feel better to know it wasn't technically his first kiss, because his whole reasoning behind kissing Ren had been wanting to get that 'awkward' first kiss out of the way. Did a kiss in the fifth grade even count? Did it even matter? Was she overthinking things again? Claire was the one feeling awkward now, and she tried not to fidget as she worked out what to say in her head. Nothing really sounded that coherent and Claire pushed her hair behind her ears before looking at him again. "I guess... I mean...but you didn't know how I felt about you, right? Ren told me that she sort of told you... but it was after you kissed her?" Because that felt important to know. She didn't want to think he had kissed Claire's best friend even after he knew Claire potentially had feelings for him.
“She just said she thought you were flirting with me, but that she wasn’t sure,” Gabe sighed. “And sometimes I thought you were, too. And then we kissed and the more I thought about it, the more it bothered me that I didn’t know for sure, that I hadn’t asked you myself. So I asked Ren not to say anything because I kinda freaked out and now she’s avoiding me.” He hadn’t seen her all day today, which was a relief as much as it was worrisome. It meant he got to spend the day with Claire,that he could put the issue out of his mind for a while and just have fun. But it also meant one of his best friends was avoiding him, something he didn’t like at all.
Claire couldn't help but be a little confused. She remembered Ren telling her that very morning that she and Gabe had sort of talked about her already. It felt like something just didn't add up, but Claire couldn't do much about that. She hadn't been there, and all she knew was that Ren came out of nowhere and asked her about her feelings for Gabe, and then Gabe asked her out, and now Claire knew the two of them had kissed, and she couldn't help but feel out of sorts. Why did it have to be Ren? Somehow it might have been easier to accept if it had been anyone else, because technically, Gabe hadn't belonged to Claire at all. He still didn't, not really. "You should probably talk to her," Claire said finally before clearing her throat. "She had been acting strange, I just didn't know why." Chewing on her lip for a second, Claire then looked at Gabe. "I should probably go. I don't know that I'd be really great company, so... and it's late."
“I don’t want to talk to her right now,” Gabe said, frustration kicking in. “What would we talk about? I’d tell her I told you and she’d ask why. And I’d rather hang out wit you and... eat pie and stuff.” He wasn’t sure what ‘stuff’ was, but he was pretty sure it wasn’t kissing anymore. His gaze shifted down, more angry with himself than anything else. He didn’t blame Claire for wanting to go, not after what he’d told her. “I’m sorry for spoiling the evening.”
"You don't have to talk to her right now," Claire countered. "But obviously you need to... to talk about whatever happened and figure it out." Despite how she was feeling, she certainly didn't want Ren and Gabe being on the outs with one another. They were both frustratingly stubborn people, but they had also been friends for far too long. Reaching out, Claire took Gabe's hand. "You didn't spoil anything. I'm... I guess it's better that you told me. I mean... I don't... we weren't... it's not like I own you, or... I don't know, Gabe. I'm not good at this." A part of her wanted to stay and try to forget what he had said, but Claire knew herself well enough to know it would bother her, even the mental image of it, and she really wouldn't be any kind of decent company at all. "I think it's just better if I go home," she whispered.
He knew Claire was right, she usually was, but was glad she emphasized that he didn’t need to talk to Ren tonight. That wasn’t going to happen unless Ren marched through the door right this second. When she took his hand, he relaxed a little and pulled her closer, wishing he could capture the moment from earlier. “I’m not either,” Gabe admitted, and that was where his frustration lay. He felt completely inexperienced when it came to things like this and it was making it far more difficult when he kept second guessing everything. “Can I see you tomorrow maybe?” He understood if she wanted some time to herself, but he didn’t want her to disappear completely.
It was difficult being close to him again, because there was a selfish part of her that wanted to just forget the past few minutes and kiss him. But Claire knew it wouldn't really be because she wanted to like before. It would be some weird, unexplainable competition thing with Ren. Kissing Gabe just to prove something to herself. And Claire didn't want her first kiss to be like that. She was still unsure as to how she would feel in the morning, but Claire nodded anyway. It was rare to go a day or so without spending time together, and while Claire felt like just hiding in her room, buried under her blankets, she knew that wasn't likely an option. "Okay. When?"
“You get to pick,” Gabe said, daring to smile a little more. “Breakfast in the morning or ice cream in the afternoon.” Either way, he wanted to try making something for her, half to cheer her up and also because he enjoyed doing so. He didn’t have a lot to give, but he figured that if he could feed her things she liked then it had to count for something.
It was sweet of him to offer both really, and while Claire still felt like she had been punched in the gut in some weird way, she managed to return his smile with a soft, faint one of her own. "Um... okay. Breakfast sounds good. Just send me a text when you're up and I'll come over." Maybe then she would have a clearer mind. Maybe by morning it wouldn't feel as bad as it did then.
“Okay,” Gabe said, feeling better now that he knew he’d see her tomorrow. He released her hand, only to pull her into a hug, holding on a for a few seconds before letting go. He couldn’t stop her from leaving, but he could make sure she knew he cared about her. “See you in the morning? I’m thinking omelets and pancakes.” So what if he went overboard? They both sounded good right now and he knew how she loved omelets.
The hug almost made her want to cry, but that was stupid and silly and Claire swallowed down the tightness in her throat. She was probably overreacting to everything, and that was why it was best to just go home and sleep it off. Things would be okay in the morning, and she could really think about it and... maybe get over it. If she was being honest with herself, the hurt feelings stemmed more from Ren than anything else, but Claire couldn't do anything about that. Pulling back, Claire nodded, unable to keep from smiling a touch at the mention of omelets. That was one thing about knowing someone for years... they knew your weak spots. "You know just where to hit me, huh?" Claire managed a small laugh before she stepped back and turned to collect her shoes by the door. "I'll see you tomorrow."
“Bright and early,” Gabe said, seeing her to the door. He wasn’t at all pleased with how this evening had gone, but he was feeling better now that he’d told her what happened. Maybe tomorrow would be better and Claire would be able to give him another chance. He could make it up to her, if he tried. All it would take would be knocking on doors after she left, tracking down peppers, cheese, and sausage to go with the eggs he already had. He would make her the best omelet she’d ever had.