Clearing the Air Who: Lia and Riley When: Early afternoon Where: The ranch
After spending a bit of time with Micah, Lia cleaned up a bit in the house she would eventually be moving away from. She wanted to be with Riley, obviously, but that didn’t mean she wouldn’t miss the place. She and Sophia had made quite a few memories there, and Lia had always craved privacy. Something she probably wouldn’t have much of, living on a ranch. But she had a lot on her mind and cleaning had helped distract her for a while. Thankfully she felt calmer, and more clear headed, when she finally walked back to the ranch.
After taking off her jacket and shoes by the front door, Lia checked on Sophia first, finding her in front of the fire with one of the ranch hands, laughing and playing a game of from the deck of cards Riley had fished out for them the night before. Then she headed off to find Riley, smiling a bit and greeting a few of the boarders that spotted her. When she finally found him, Lia reminded herself not to let her emotions get the best of her. They were finally in a good place, and she didn’t want to screw it up so quickly by starting another argument. “Hey,” she greeted, walking over to give him a quick kiss. “Got a minute?”
Riley had been thrilled to see Sophia enjoying herself in front of the fire when he’d come in from checking the boundary fences. It was something he could have delegated but he liked to do it himself. Both because Tom was worthless at it and because he was feeling nostalgic, remembering Lia standing there in the rain on his family’s ranch all those years ago. He was in a good mood when he came in to get ready to meet the vet who would be coming in a couple hours. He needed lunch and a shower. He kissed his munchkin on the top of the head and felt his heart swell when she said, “Hi Daddy!”
Then he was off to his shower. When he finished, he got dressed and went downstairs to his study to get a payment ready for the vet and to make sure it was in the ledger properly. He wasn’t sure why he was bothering with a ledger with the doors closed indefinitely but it made sense to keep doing it. Just in case. He looked up when Lia came in and stood to his feet politely. “Hey,” he said back. “I have several for you. What’s on your mind?”
Lia hesitated, aware that she needed to choose her words carefully. Saying the wrong thing would send this whole day spiraling quickly, and she didn't want that. But she also didn't want to just hedge around the point of the conversation, so Lia managed a faint smile, glancing down at the ledger he had been writing in. "I talked to Micah," she said, not at all afraid to tell him so, since he knew she had planned to. She didn't want to tell him that Micah still had his reservations about Riley, so she pushed that part aside. "He suggested that maybe you should talk to Nic. His boyfriend," she clarified. "Maybe talking to someone else in our situation would be helpful for us."
Riley watched Lia’s face, wondering what she was about to say. It looked like it might be a little tough for her and he gave her a bit of a smile as encouragement. Whatever it was, he could handle it. He hoped. He nodded when she said she’d spoken to Micah, his expression a bit sheepish. He figured she’d probably get a full account of his behavior which had been ridiculous at best. Then she went on and well wasn’t that mortifying? Micah had suggested Riley talk to his boyfriend to get some perspective or maybe to further prove that he was, in fact, gay? A day or two ago that might have irritated the hell out of him but right now he couldn’t be unhappy with either Micah or Lia. “I know I went in at him with some pretty crap assumptions. I don’t believe those things anymore. Probably I never believed them, I just worried what if, you know? What if all the things I have right now that make me so happy are only waiting to go away.” He stopped himself from going on and confessing things he hadn’t even brought up to Micah. Not because he wanted to keep things from her but because they were ugly things she didn’t need to know. Fears that he no longer held onto.
It was something of a relief that Riley didn't get immediately annoyed by the suggestion. Lia had feared that he might, but she relaxed some when he spoke. She listened, her eyes watching his. She wondered if he realized what Micah would have probably told her about their confrontation. Lia could acknowledge that she didn't feel anger about it. Disappointment, more than anything. Of course, this had all happened before they were able to finally communicate, and that was probably what kept her temper at bay. But that didn't mean they shouldn't talk about it. "By crap assumptions, do you mean accusing him of sleeping with me?" Lia asked simply, her voice calm. "He told me that you seemed to think we were having an affair."
Riley's stomach rolled slightly at her blunt question. He'd figured Micah would give her full disclosure but he hadn't expected her to confront him with it. Though he supposed he should have. Why wouldn't she? That was an accusation that didn't just involved Micah, it involved her and Riley's seeming lack of trust in her. He looked down at his desk for a moment, trying to figure out what to say because the first thing that came to mind was, "I was drinking, what can I say?" But that wasn't going to help them. He took a deep breath and looked at her. "You talked about him so much that I got it into my head you might be in love with him. And it spun out of control because I let my fears take control instead of talking to you. I'm very sorry I said that to him, that I even ever thought it."
While it still stung that he had thought Lia would be capable of such a thing, she realized she couldn't vocalize her feelings about it. It didn't seem fair, given the progress they had made. And his apology. She knew things had been rocky for them since finding one another again, but there had been some amazing moments too. And Lia couldn't help but wonder if they had meant anything to Riley at all, if he could have believed, even for a second, that she would do something like that to him. But those were her own feelings, and deep down she knew Riley had just been dealing with issues he hadn't communicated to her. So Lia took a moment before she nodded. "All right. I think, maybe, when you have some time, you should talk to Micah yourself. I want you two to be able to get along."
Riley knew it couldn’t be easy for her to assimilate that into her thoughts. That he’d stopped trusting her even for a second. Their marriage was so shaky in his mind. A fragile thing that could blow away in a second. He was trying to hold on with both hands because he knew he’d made the biggest mistake of not holding on hard enough the last time. But he only had Lia’s word that she was doing the same. And once he’d seen Micah it sort of solidified in his drunken brain that here was a better, stabler man who was also a werewolf. There wasn’t any baggage there with Micah the way there was with Riley. Why wouldn’t Lia prefer him? It had been why he hadn’t readily been able to believe Micah was gay. “I plan to talk to him,” he said, nodding. Though now it felt like a lot bigger deal than it had before to face the guy and eat crow. “You’re not going to start inviting him to over, are you?” he asked after the last thing she said occurred to him.
Lia could understand his doubts. She had her own, obviously, although it hadn't once occurred to her that Riley might be seeing another woman. It was only recently that she had begun to notice the girls who worked for him, or were boarders, but she blamed those sparks of jealousy on the changes she was dealing it. It was ludicrous and irrational to never want him around another female, and even if she felt it, she knew better than to voice it. All that really mattered at the moment was that Riley and Micah get along. She needed both of them in her life, and she wasn't sure she could handle having to deal with their dislike of one another, especially when a simple apology should be enough to clear things up between them. At Riley's question, Lia lifted a brow curiously. "Is it a problem if I do?" It wasn't as if she had plans to have Micah over all the time, but if she wanted to invite he and Nic to dinner, or even ask Micah to come over for any reason, Lia wanted to know she was able to do so without it causing problems.
Riley was sure that he could make peace with Micah. The man had seemed reasonable enough. Riley would eat crow, apologize for being an ass and that would be that. Lia could spend time with him as much as she liked because it didn't bother Riley if she did. At least, not a whole lot. It still stung some that she had another man in her life that was as important or more than he was because of this damned werewolf thing but he would learn to live with that because it was necessary. But did he want to have to spend time with Micah on a regular basis himself? To come home and find Micah in his house, laughing and talking with his wife? No. That would be extremely uncomfortable to him. He almost stuffed that all down and then realized he was going to dig himself in deep again by not communicating. "It's not a problem, no… But I'd be lying if I said I'd like it. I don't want to keep it from you because if I bite my tongue I know it's going to cause problems again. And it's not that I want to keep you from seeing him or to not feel like this is your house too. I don't know. Maybe I just need some time to wrap my head around it?"
That was still slightly confusing to Lia, because she had thought they worked out the Micah-issue. He wasn’t a threat to their marriage in any way that really mattered, but Riley still wouldn’t like finding Micah in his home with Lia? Was it going to feel like her home too if she couldn’t invite her friends over? Lia took a moment to think that over, to choose her next words before she slipped her fingers into the back pockets of her jeans. “You wouldn’t like it because it’s Micah? Or because it’s another man?” She didn’t sound annoyed, or accusatory. She just wanted to know what issues remained. “It’s fine if you need time, Riley. I don’t want to do anything to upset you, but I also don’t want to feel like a guest in your home, if it’s supposed to be ours.”
Riley knew that what he was saying was confusing. He knew why too and perhaps he needed a moment to figure out his underlying thoughts on it. He took a moment and then he said, "It's because it's Micah. And not because I have a problem with your relationship with him. It’s because I think that coming into my house to find him there with you would feel like, to me, an extension of him saying he'd protect you against me. Like there was something you needed to be protected from and he was there to make sure that's exactly what happened when I came in. He really unsettled me with that, Lia. I don't understand how or why he got the impression I'd be harmful to you and that's going to be a touchy subject even if I don't have a problem with you having the relationship you have with him." He sighed and ran a hand up the back of his hair. "I don't want you to feel like a guest here either. I'm only trying to tell you how I'd feel. Maybe I do just need time. I don't want to be the reason you don't feel at home here."
Lia listened and understood what he was saying. She hadn't thought to ask Micah that part, but she realized she ought to. There was nothing dangerous about Riley, and Lia had never once in her life felt threatened by him in any capacity. But she paused, let her mind work over what he told her and then gave a small nod, reaching out to take his hand. "I don't... think he meant physically harmful, Riley. I understand how you feel, I do. I won't invite him over until you start to feel more comfortable with it. And with him. There's just something that I hadn't told you about yet, with this werewolf thing. There are obviously side effects, and mental changes, like feeling as though I need to belong to a pack." Lia stepped in close to him, wanting to be near him. "I think Micah is worried more about us not being able to work things out. About splitting up for good. Maybe he's worried more about you wanting to leave me." She licked her lips and lifted her gaze to his. "Werewolves... they mate for life. And I'm in love with you. I want to be with you. And if you decided someday you didn't want to be with me anymore... my feelings wouldn't change."
Riley took his turn listening, his eyes darkening slightly at the idea Micah would have it in his head Riley might want to leave Lia. Where did this guy come up with this stuff? Or was it that his boyfriend had wanted to leave so he was transferring that into Riley and Lia’s relationship? Whatever it was, he knew he was going to have to bite the bullet and talk to the guy sooner rather than later. Clear the air. “I’m in love with you too, Lia. More so now than I ever was before. I can’t imagine ever wanting to leave you or Sophia for any reason.” He took her hand, kissed it gently, then held it. “You can tell Micah he doesn’t have to take on so much worry over our marriage. I’m committed to making this work and I know you are too. There’s never really been anyone for you but me so maybe I mate for life too.” In high school he’d dated plenty but Lia had been his first. After that, there had been no one else who had ever caught his eye. Not even in the years he’d thought she was dead. He hadn’t decided to be celibate in tribute to her memory, no one else had compared to her. That was just how he was and always had been about her. “Have you ever thought about maybe renewing our vows? It might solidify the fact we’re married for Sophia too.”
There was probably nothing he could have said that was more perfect than that. Lia could feel a lot of the tension seeping out of her shoulders as she smiled at him. She had to stop assuming every touchy subject would lead to an argument. They were both trying now, and that was the important thing. Lifting her hand, Lia brushed her fingers gently through his hair. "I think," she said slowly, watching the dark strands slide between her fingertips, "that's a wonderful idea." Renewing their vows would feel like a renewal of their marriage as well. Maybe they could simply let go of the past and focus completely on the future. It would be a lovely symbol of that, at least. "We can invite our friends, or just have it be you, me and Sophia. Either way, I think it would be amazing." Lia smiled and pushed up on her toes to press a kiss to his.
Riley smiled as she ran her fingers through his hair. Whenever she did it he somehow felt safe. Not that he hadn’t before but it was a reassuring gesture to him. He loved it. He loved her. He put his arms around her when she kissed him, returning it with a kiss full of his love. “I think we should invite friends. I think we should be ridiculously open about how we feel about each other.” He was already imagining Sophia as an adorable little flower girl, remembering Lia in her wedding dress on their first wedding. None of it had to be outlandish, they probably couldn’t have anything similar to the first time they’d said their vows, but they would be together, in front of God and friends and declaring their love once more. It felt really important to do this and he was actually a little excited to plan some of it. “But I am not inviting Tom. That’s where I draw the line.”
"All right, no Tom," Lia said with a soft laugh before wrapping her arms around his neck to keep him close. "I think it'll be nice to have people we care about with us, and then maybe we can have a party afterward, a barbecue or something like that." Any kind of celebration was just fine with Lia. All that mattered was that she and Riley re-committed to one another and let go of past hurts and resentments that seemed to be crippling them today. She lifted a blonde brow and smiled. "Do you want to plan this together?" As much as Lia had loved her mother - when she wasn't being overbearing and critical - Lia hadn't had much say in their first wedding. Since their parents had taken care of the expenses, Lia's mother had made the majority of the decisions, most of which were grand and extravagant. It had been frustrating for Lia, a nineteen year old girl who had really just wanted a simple wedding with family.
Riley gave her a light kiss when she laughed as though trying to catch it before it got away. “I think it will be too. And there most definitely has to be a party afterward. No fancy reception because that was insufferable the last time. All the stuffy speeches from relatives I didn’t even remember and the name cards and politics of who got to sit where. I was glad I wasn’t at table nine. The hair-pulling alone…” he let his voice trail off into a half chuckle at the memory of some of the minor fiascos and utter fussiness of the whole affair. “We should do a barbecue like you said. Like the one we had with just our friends before I shipped out. I’d love to plan with you. We can drag Mrs. Haggerty into it too. She’ll be really pleased to know we’re doing this.” He felt a renewed sense of hope having this conversation with her. Something higher than he’d felt when he’d finally broken down and really talked to her the other night. It made his heart soar and made him want to laugh.
It seemed like they were on the same page in terms of the casualness of it all, which was an immense relief. Lia smiled at the memories that surfaced as Riley spoke. That whole day had been a whirlwind, a mess of faces and well wishes, rumors that Lia was pregnant, given how young they were. She missed her family with an intensity she couldn't quite put into words, but Lia had a feeling this kind of commitment ceremony would fit the two of them so much better than their first wedding. And the best part was that Riley wouldn't be shipping out to war afterward. He would be here, with her and Sophia. "I'm on board with all of that," Lia said. "The more help, the better, if you ask me. Do you want to pick the date?"
Riley smiled with unabashed adoration at her, feeling like he had just after he’d managed to propose the first time. Giddy and high on life. He managed to contain himself. No loud whoop of joy like before. But he did kiss her, putting all his love into it yet again. “Mmm, how long do you think it will take to plan something like this?” he asked when he’d pulled back to take a breath. He couldn’t imagine it would be something done in a day, though he hoped it wouldn’t take months the way it had with her mother at the helm. His own poor mother had tried to get involved but she was quickly swamped by the details and politely backed out to do other things like talk him through his worries about being a terrible husband. He missed his mother and her calm, blue eyes, so kind and full of wisdom. And the pain of having married the wrong man. He hoped he never became his father and put Lia through all his mother had been through.
“Not long,” Lia said, peppering kisses along his jawline. “This won’t be like our first wedding. We don’t even need to do invitations. We can just invite people ourselves, let them know when it is. We’ve just got to pick a date, figure out who’s coming and what we want to eat. Might be nice to just renew our vows here, what do you think?” She just wanted something simple and low key. She would still let Sophia dress up, although she had a feeling her daughter would rather stomp around in the mud and wear jeans than a dress, but Lia would cross that bridge when she got to it. “Maybe a couple weeks? Or even just a week? Hell, I don't know.” Lia pulled back and kissed his lips again. “Once we know the weather’s going to get better, and we can give people plenty of notice.”
Riley tilted his chin a bit to give her lips better access, enjoying those kisses. He had what felt like a permanent smile on his face as he kissed her back. "Ah yes, the weather," he said. "Let's hope that works with us though I suppose there's enough room to be inside if we don't invite all of Delphi. Which I hope we don't. Simple is the way to go with this, I think. Do we want to figure out if there's a minister or someone ordained to lead proceedings?" he asked and kissed the corner of her mouth. "Or do you want it to just be us saying our vows to each other?" he asked and kissed the other corner.
“We can play it by ear,” Lia said, unable to keep from smiling when Riley kissed the sides of her mouth. “I’ll ask around about a minister. Maybe there’s one in the hospital. If we can’t find one, then we’ll just do it ourselves.” She would prefer a minister, sure, but she wouldn’t let the lack of one derail their plans. Ducking her face down, Lia pressed her lips against Riley’s neck before nuzzling him with her nose. “Do you think we ought to let Mrs. Haggerty plan the menu? I don’t want her to think she’s obligated, but if she wants to help, I’d love for her to do it.”
Riley could see Mrs. Haggerty’s face when they announced what their intentions were. “You might have a hard time keeping her from helping once she’s aware. But she’s pretty good at not railroading, it’s the only reason I eat the cookies with the veggies in them!” He chuckled gently and tugged the ends of her hair playfully. “I don’t know about you, Mrs. Pollard, but I’m a happy man. A happy man who wants to tell you to clear the rest of your afternoon and come take a nap with me.” He gave her a look that said there would be anything but sleeping.
"I'm completely fine with as much help as she wants to give. She's not going to be pushing for expensive champagne and a five tier cake," Lia pointed out with a small smile. As lovely as their first wedding had been, her mother had definitely gone overboard. But then again, her mother had gone overboard on everything. Lia had always suspected the extravagant wedding had been some kind of subconscious effort on her mother's part to save face in front of her friends. An expensive, over the top wedding to make up for the fact that Lia was marrying a ranch working cowboy down across town rather than someone her parents chose for her. But none of that mattered now and Lia had to work on letting go of the past, rather than letting it control her emotions. "I have to say I'm a pretty happy woman," she murmured, smiling as her arms fell to slide around his waist and pull him close. "And rather sleepy, so I think a nap is definitely in order." And yes, she knew exactly what Riley meant by 'napping'. Sophia would stay preoccupied down here with her games, and if not... well, one of the nice things about Lia's hearing is that she would know if Sophia were coming to find her well before she reached the bedroom. "Let's go upstairs."
Riley grinned at her mention of expensive champagne and a five tier cake. There had been so much of both and the aftermath of the former had resulted in some funny things happening with the latter thanks to some of his family and friends. He had been pretty aware of the reasoning behind the extravagance. He’d watched her mother’s face when his side of the party began to get rowdy in front of her side. He wasn’t particularly pleased that they reinforced her belief that she needed to downplay the whole daughter marrying a cowboy aspect of the wedding. But it had made for some really funny stories later on. “Nope, definitely no five tier cake. And I’m hoping for beer.” He smiled and slid his arms around her when she got close. “I’m happy you’re happy. Let’s see what we can do about you being sleepy.” He stood back and took her hand to lead her out of the office and toward his room. It felt like a breath of fresh air had been blown in between them. It was definitely a high but Riley knew not to hang all his hopes on keeping that. There were still difficult things but if anything, their recent conversations proved that they had a pretty good shot at making this work.