Well, the life of an Assassin's supposed to be lonely. If it's not, it's probably going to be short instead. I don't know if I buy into all that but I saw how Father was after Mother died. Putting yourself out there like that's terrifying. I imagine it's not dissimilar from what you've been through, in experience if not in particulars?
Think there's flour somewhere. I should warn you though, I'm really terrible in the kitchens.