I was nearly married, once! Then a bunch of shem lords invaded, kidnapped me and several other women, and murdered my intended, among other things. That's how I ended up a warden, actually. After I revenge-slaughtered my way out of the castle, it was conscription or execution.
Alienage weddings are fun, though, when they don't end in piles of bodies. Basically everyone comes out for it, and there's drinking and dancing and as much feasting as you can manage while being dirt poor, and the groom gives the bride a ring. The ceremony itself is more or less the same as for humans--elves in the city are nearly all Andrastian.