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Tweak says, "take that and rewind it back"

katniss everdeen - au, jaha (burningwings) wrote in the100,
@ 2015-07-20 21:17:00

Entry tags:

!log/thread, katniss everdeen, penelope featherington

WHO: Katniss & Penelope
WHAT: Talking about ~boys~ (kind of maybe)
WHEN: Monday evening
WHERE: Their room
WARNINGS: There may be vague references to sexual stuff in Katniss's narrative. Otherwise probably low.

Katniss was trying not to push herself too hard, but she was doing it anyway.

It was just too frustrating to be stuck inside this bunker. It grated on her nerves to be underground, reminded her of Thirteen and of the sewers. It gave her too much time to think about all the things she didn't want to think about, and her mind had a bad habit of wandering along trains of thought that it really shouldn't. The last few days, at least — since Friday, specifically — she'd had other things to think about, just as distracting and significantly less upsetting, but that didn't mean she wasn't still itching to get out of this bunker as fast as she could.

Which meant that she was back in training, in a sense. Her exercise regime had started to look more and more like the regimen they'd given her in Thirteen, and she hated that, but the simple fact was that it was effective. She walked, she built up her strength, and now she was trying to run. She ran two miles on the treadmill in the gym, her legs and lungs aching the whole time, but her wound stayed closed, and the exertion burned away some of her frustration.

Sweaty, but pleased with herself, she headed back to her room. She opened the door, and then came to an abrupt stop. Penelope was there, and she was dancing, and Katniss had the distinct feeling that she'd walked in on a private moment. She froze, tempted to try to sneak back out without being noticed, but sure that it would only make things worse between them again. "Sorry," she said finally, "I'll-- I was just-- I can go."

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featherington
2015-07-21 05:28 pm UTC (link)

It wasn't often that a fellow claimed to return Penelope's regard. In fact, in all of her 28 years of living, no man had claimed any tender feelings for her beyond that of a nice, chummy friend. So upon reading that Cullen seemed to be as enamored of her as she was of him, it only seemed natural that Penelope sweep herself into the steps of her favorite dance, the waltz. She even hummed a little, hugging her tablet to her chest as she executed a perfect turn.

Opening her eyes as she paused to see if Cullen had replied, Penelope realized she wasn't alone. Katniss stood, framed by the doorway, and Penelope blushed a bright, bright red. "No -- no, please don't. It was nothing."

But it was everything. "You must think me the greatest of idiots. But -- well, Cullen will be calling on me later."

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burningwings
2015-07-21 05:38 pm UTC (link)

"No," Katniss said, "I don't think that."

There were plenty of things that would make her think someone was an idiot. Dancing wasn't one of them. Penelope wasn't an idiot, she was just — so innocent, naive, or at least that was how she seemed by comparison to Katniss. But a lot of people were innocent and naive compared to her, and it wasn't as if she wished her experiences on anyone.

She still hadn't really figured out how to talk to her, but she knew that silence and keeping her distance would only make her roommate feel like Katniss hated her, so she was making the effort.

Adrenaline was wearing off, leaving her exhausted and her legs feeling weak and a little achey, so she closed the door and stepped into the room, heading for her bed to sit down.

"I like dancing," she said, because it was true. "There's nothing wrong with it." She paused, then added, "Who's Cullen?"

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featherington
2015-07-21 06:00 pm UTC (link)

"You're kind. I was being silly, and foolish," Penelope said, smiling. She moved to the chair that sat near Katniss's bed, and sank into it. She drew her knees up comfortably. "I've always adored dancing. Did you enjoy your walk today?"

Peneleope looked away, a smile once more playing around her lips. "Cullen is -- he's my very dear friend." She wasn't certain what he was actually called, so she settled on describing what she thought their friendship had evolved into. "He is courting me, I think."

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burningwings
2015-07-21 06:08 pm UTC (link)

Katniss sank down onto her bed, feeling her legs all but give out from under her. She was probably going to regret how hard she'd pushed herself, later, but she didn't care. She had to get out of this bunker, sooner rather than later.

"I know a few dances, from Twelve," she said. "I don't think I know the one you were doing." She lifted her hands, running them over her face and back over her hair, to smooth the wild strands that had gotten in her face. The rest of it was back in its usual braid, hanging down over one shoulder.

The smallest hint of a smile appeared at the corners of her mouth. There were probably specific things that people said whenever someone confessed to having a boy interested in them, but Katniss hadn't had enough of these conversations — or any of them, really — to know what they were. She settled for, "That's good. I mean — you look like you're happy about it."

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featherington
2015-07-22 05:40 pm UTC (link)

"It was a waltz. I'd be happy to teach you, someday," Penelope offered. It was hard for her to quell her smile, so pleased was she with how the evening had gone so far. "It's not difficult, and done with the right partner it's... well, it's magical."

Katniss was smiling, making Penelope even more pleased with the world. "I am happy. I didn't know I could be happy here." She paused, looking at Katniss closely. She looked sweaty but satisfied. "Are you happy here?"

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burningwings
2015-07-22 06:17 pm UTC (link)

"I'd like that," Katniss said, and she meant it. "I can teach you the dances I know, if you want."

No matter how awful things were, she'd been able to dance when the moment felt right. The last time she'd done it had been at Finnick and Annie's wedding, and that had been one of the best moments of the entire rebellion. Over too soon, ruined too soon by the mission and the mutts that had taken Finnick down, but... he was here. So that was only the stuff of nightmares.

She forced her mind away from it, because it was a dangerous path for her mind to go down, and focused on Penelope. Her roommate was happy, she could tell that much; this place couldn't be so bad if it was a place where people could be genuinely happy. But as for Katniss herself...

Her smile faded a little. It was a loaded question, although Penelope probably didn't know it. "I don't mind it here," she said. Explaining that in detail was too much to go into, much more than she wanted to share — for Penelope's sake as much as her own — so she said instead, "Sometimes I feel like I could be."

Specifically, when she was with Peeta. She let her thoughts turn to him, because it was better to dwell on what made her happy than what didn't, and she offered Penelope a small smile before clarifying, "There's someone who makes me feel like I could be."

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