Oh GOD. Well, okay, so Josh's sister, Hannah, totally liked Mike, who was MY boyfriend? So last year, we all played a prank on her. TOTALLY dick move, right, but she'd been making moves on him for MONTHS so Mike pretended he liked her and she got all "let's make love" and we all saw it and then laughed at her, so she ran outside and then Beth, Josh's other sister, she ran after her and then they both disappeared and were never heard of again.
Only, the next year, Josh invited us all BACK to the cabin, where he totally had designed this whole "Ha ha, I scared you" bullshit thing because we didn't feel BAD ENOUGH ALREADY or something. And we thought there was a psycho killing us, but it was just Josh and fake blood and his stupid MOVIE crap. At least, that's what we thought, but then we found out that we were being HUNTED by a wendigo, which is a totally gross like, naked mole rat cannibal thing, but they used to be MINERS and now they ate people and took them to their LAIR and that's what had happened to Hannah and Beth - like, Hannah ate Beth's corpse and then tried to eat US and I got bitten and Mike thought about shooting me and didn't and then Josh disappeared and Chris and Ashley died and then Mike and I woke up HERE.