WHO: Billy Sinclair & Luka Romanov, then Billy & Mark Reilly WHAT: Luka asks Billy to sneak into his room at night so Luka can show him the heart he's been working on. After Billy sneaks back OUT, he decides not to go to his own room but to Mark's, because apparently sneaking around between bedrooms is what Mark and Billy love to do ALL THE TIME.
Weirdly enough, Luka hadn’t asked Billy to sneak into his room for sex. Or it would be weird, if they hadn’t decided that days ago. They just wanted to spend some private time with each other without the risk of someone walking in. The only real risk was that Luka shared his bathroom with Peter and Sebastian, but neither of them had super senses and Billy could always hear if one of them was in there. Avoiding them to use it if need be wasn’t that difficult. Luka had a habit of locking his door and working all night, anyway, and his room was more of a lab with a bed shoved into the corner anyway.
It was chilly, but he left the window open for Billy---and then tugged him through it when he was halfway in. At first it seemed like it was for a kiss (and it was), but it was partially to keep Billy from accidentally stumbling into his work table, where the mostly-finished cybernetic heart was resting on a stand, in the midst of his tools and supplies. It was attached to its stand by tubes to mimic blood flow, pumping a bright blue liquid through it and back into the base. The synthetic cardiac muscle was clear, leaving the ventricles, valves and atriums visible.
Billy stumbled into the room, clinging to Luka and twisting so he didn’t hit the table. He turned to look at it, and any words he had just sort of died. “Oh, my God,” was what he said instead, pulling away from Luka to crouch down and look. “Is this it...?”
“That’s it.” Luka didn’t show it off. He didn’t like to share his work before it was finished, even with Bethany. Everyone knew he was working on it, but he was practically a hermit in here. No one came in, no one came out. “It’s not completely finished yet. Almost.” He smiled tentatively.
“It’s beautiful,” Billy breathed, keeping his distance. He didn’t want to disturb it. It wasn’t just a functional valve; it was a work of art. “That’s going to go in your chest.”
“That’s the idea.” Luka touched Billy’s back, gently trailing his hand down his spine. The sound of its beating was faint---just enough to lull him to sleep while the glow acted as a nightlight. The room was comfortably cluttered. With the lights off and the heart beating, it must have felt like a womb.
Billy glanced up at Luka. There were tears in his eyes. He didn’t sob easily, but he was moved by beauty. It was able to overwhelm him completely. He took Luka’s hand, lightly kissing his fingertips. “This is amazing,” he said. “You built this. And it works.”
“It works.” Mostly. Luka pulled him in, pressing Billy’s back to his chest. “Listen to it.” He was trying to be collected and suave, but in reality he was somewhere between relieved and anxious, and it showed.
Billy closed his eyes, leaning back against Luka and listening to the gentle, distant beat of what would become Luka’s heart. “I...” He didn’t know what to say, so he just hushed himself and paid attention to the heartbeat. It was steady, comforting. He had sensitive hearing, but he couldn’t hear heartbeats, not like this. Jack Murdock could, and he briefly wondered if this was how Jack heard the world.
“I won’t ask you to sneak around again unless you want to,” Luka said quietly. “I just wanted to show you.” He needed Billy to know that Luka was working. It wasn’t a dream or a concept. It was real and formed and less than two months away from being put into his chest. If Billy could see and hear it, it was more real for both of them.
“Thank you,” Billy said honestly. “I’m... honored that you’re showing this to me.”
“I can’t keep it a secret forever.” Luka kissed the back of his neck before resting his chin in Billy’s shoulder. “And if it doesn’t work like I think it will, I don’t want to hold anything back from you.”
Billy reached up and touched Luka’s cheek. “You trust yourself. You know it’s going to work. Or... you hope it will, and that’s enough for right now. Maybe you can’t know for sure, but... you’re not playing around.”
“No. I’m not.” Another kiss to Billy’s cheek and Luka pulled back, running a hand down Billy’s spine. “So. Do you want to play chess? Are you thirsty? I don’t have alcohol. ---Not that you’d want alcohol. Anyway.”
“I really don’t want to play chess,” Billy said quietly, turning and kissing Luka’s throat. “Not right now. Maybe later. And no alcohol.”
“Then what do you want to do?” Luka touched the underside of Billy’s chin and gently kissed his mouth. “I didn’t mean to make you sneak in here just to stare at my science project.”
Honestly? Seeing Luka’s heart like this was touching and beautiful and … it turned him on. He wanted to throw himself around Luka and make out in his bed until the sun came up. So he said so. “I want to kiss you until dawn,” he said hopelessly, slumping against him.
“I might be able to handle that.” Luka wrapped his arms around Billy to catch him, pulling him back toward the bed. It was the only thing to sit on; the rest of the room was taken up by Luka’s workspace, after all, the bed shoved unceremoniously in the corner.
Billy fell onto the bed, pulling Luka with him. He kicked his sneakers off, letting them fall to the floor. “It’s peaceful in here,” he murmured, kissing Luka’s jaw. The atmosphere was otherworldly with Luka’s heart glowing and beating in the corner.
“This is where I make life,” Luka said quietly, kissing Billy’s nose. It was dramatic and kind of cheesy, but so was Billy. This was his workroom, it was his home. He was changing his fate in this room, and it was warm and safe as childhood. “Do you want to set an alarm? Just in case, I want to give you time to sneak back.”
This is where I make life.
God. If Billy wanted to lose his virginity at any moment, it was right now. But they’d set boundaries for a reason, so Billy just touched Luka’s cheek and hooked a leg over Luka’s hip. “That’s... right. You’re right, I need time to sneak back.” He didn’t want to think about leaving.
Luka gave Billy a long, loving kiss before he pulled back. He snuck in another kiss to Billy’s nose before he went to set an alarm on his phone for Billy. He didn’t want to, but Billy couldn’t be caught going to and from their rooms. “Eventually we won’t have to do this.” Here, in this room, Luka felt like he was definitely going to live.
“It’s kind of sexy to sneak around,” Billy admitted, scrunching his nose.
“Yeah?” Luka crawled back to him, laying down next to Billy and kissing his forehead.
“It’s not ideal,” Billy said, “for a lot of reasons. But … being here with you, in this room, knowing no one else knows...” He snuggled in and pulled Luka over him. “It’s definitely sexy.”
“Good. We’ll be doing it for a long time.” Luka comfortably settled between Billy’s legs. Kissing was fine. Kissing, Luka could do. Not for as long as Billy might have wanted, but he didn’t want to admit that he tired easily.
Billy made a little noise and he nuzzled Luka’s throat, kissing and sucking at the soft, vulnerable skin there. He was a teenage boy, and he was a teenage boy who’d just been wooed by an insanely complex and beautiful science project. His opinion on saving himself was starting to change. He wrapped his legs around Luka and tugged at his shirt to keep him close. “Luka----”
Luka nuzzled, pushing at Billy with his nose before he had time to leave a mark. Hickeys definitely wouldn’t help them keep a secret. “Hm?”
Billy’s breath caught in his throat and he tipped his head to murmur in Luka’s ear. “That thing that I said, about not being ready... can we forget I said that?”
Luka paused before he pulled back. “Billy...”
“I mean, I …” Billy fidgeted a little, deflating when Luka pulled back. Bad sign? Bad sign. “I’m sixteen but I’m not... sixteen, you know what I mean.”
Luka touched his cheek, gently tracing the line of Billy’s jaw before he said, “I’m not ready.”
Billy’s ears twitched. “What?” He swallowed hard. “Oh. Oh, my god, you’re too sick.”
“I can’t really... ugh.” Luka buried his face against Billy’s shoulder, embarrassed. “I’m not … comfortable. I’ve tried having sex and it doesn’t feel good for me. I don’t want you to think it’s you.”
Billy cradled Luka against him, taking some time to process this. Uncertain and insecure, he said: “But it’s not me?” What if it was him? What if Luka felt guilty that Billy was so young? What if Luka had second thoughts? What if Luka----
“No. God, no, of course it’s not you. It’s the medication I’m on, I haven’t had sex I really enjoyed since before my heart attack.” He felt old and sick. There was a difference between being sick and feeling sick and Luka was both by now.
“Okay,” Billy said quietly, kissing Luka’s hair. “Then we’ll wait. Of course we’ll wait. Probably for the better.” He chuckled quietly. “I’m sorry, you just. You romanced me so hard in the last twenty minutes that I was ready to just throw myself on the bed and have you destroy my virginity.” He paused. “In a sweet, loving, beautiful way.”
“Sex isn’t all about fucking.” Luka kissed Billy’s cheek, grateful that it hadn’t turned Billy off from the relationship completely. “I guess if you’re stuck on it I can destroy something tonight. How does that sound?” Billy was sixteen and Luka could get arrested, but only if that was what Billy wanted. And quite frankly, if Billy decided that any of this was wrong and worth calling the police over, then Luka deserved it.
Billy raised his eyebrows, trying not to smile. “Go on.”
“Mm. Question first: where am I allowed to touch you?”
“Um.” Billy pressed his lips together to avoid blurting EVERYWHERE. Luka was asking a valid, polite question and it was … wonderfully charming. There were the obvious answers, as if Luka was asking if he could open up Billy’s jeans, but he didn’t ask that. Curious as to what Luka would do depending on how he answered, Billy tipped his head back. “My neck. And my ears.” Nothing else.
Luka wrapped his hand around one of Billy’s ears and let it slide through his fingers. His mouth went to Billy’s throat with soft, warm kisses that were just shy of leaving marks. Billy could get away with scarves this time of year, but not in gym class, and Pella would notice no matter what. Or Peter. Either would be horrible. His lips hovered near Billy’s collar, but Billy hadn’t given him permission to go any lower.
“And … my shoulders,” Billy mumbled softly, stretching to get comfortable. No one had ever really touched him like this. He’d fooled around with Mark and Brön but Billy had never felt quite as in control. He was setting boundaries because he could. Because it was erotic. “But that’s all.”
Luka tugged at Billy’s sweater so it exposed his left shoulder. He kissed and sucked at the skin---where he did leave marks, in places that would be covered by all of his clothes. “That’s all.”
Billy bit his lip and squirmed a little, wrapping his legs more tightly around Luka’s waist. “Yes,” he breathed. “That’s all you can touch. For now.”
“Then I’ll put off what I was planning to do.” Luka didn’t sound all that bothered, though. He was happy to kiss what he could get his mouth on, using one hand to massage and caress Billy’s ears.
“Mmm. I changed my mind, I want to go slow. Like this.” Because oh holy God in Heaven that felt wonderful, and if Billy had a say in things----and he did----he was going to savor every second of this. “No rushing.”
* * *
The alarm went off at two in the morning. It wasn’t quite kissing until dawn, but Billy had classes and he needed to get a little bit of sleep. The problem was, he didn’t want to sneak back into his own room. Kaito would wake up, and … he’d get nosy. Billy just didn’t want to deal with it. Maybe it was a bad idea to avoid him altogether, because that would raise more questions, but Billy would figure things out later.
He felt high. He’d been touched in a way that he’d demanded and that he’d consented to, he didn’t feel like he’d been violated or pushed too far, and … mm. He was in heaven. In love. And he knew he should have felt bad about the situation but he didn’t.
So instead of going back to his own dorm, he went to Mark’s room, sneaking in and crouching by Mark’s bed.
“Hey. Hey. Can I crash with you?”
Thankfully, Mark was in his own bed tonight. The thing with Owen was still a secret and neither of them wanted to risk being caught going in and out. The roommate thing didn’t help, either; that’s what the boathouse was for. He jerked away when Billy snuck in, rubbing sleep out of his eyes until he knew what was going on.
“Hm?. ..Yeah. Hi. What’s up?”
“Hi. Sorry,” Billy whispered. “I don’t want to go back to my room.”
“It’s okay. C’mere.” Mark scooted over to one side of the bed and pushed down the blankets. After a second of thought, he reached underneath the pillow on that side and dragged a worn, stuffed giraffe over to his side and tucked it back underneath his own pillow to hide it.
Billy stood and wriggled out of his jeans, shoving them off and kicking them aside. “Thanks,” he said, hopping into bed and pretending he didn’t see the giraffe. He glanced across the room to where Jack was sleeping, curled up next to Lizzie with his arm thrown around her. A threadbare stuffed dog was on the floor. “Is he asleep?” he asked. “I know Jack wakes up easily, but... is he asleep?”
“Maybe. Where the hell have you been? You’re never out late?”
Billy bit his lip, trying not to grin. He was failing, because he was definitely grinning. “I was in Luka’s room,” he said softly.
“You slut.” Mark smiled, dragging the blankets back up to keep it as private as possible. “So. What happened?”
“He showed me his heart,” Billy said, keeping his voice down so he didn’t disturb Jack. “His secret project. He let me see it, and... Mark, it’s beautiful. It’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. It glows. You can hear it beating. It’s incredible.”
“So it’s real? I always thought he was just running away from home and needed an excuse.”
Billy shook his head. “No. It’s real. It’s really...” He sighed softly, closing his eyes. “It’s real. He’s making life and it’s incredible. He’s going to save himself.”
“So... did you end up saving yourself?” Mark settled down with his head on the pillow, slipping his hand underneath it.
“Mm?” Billy raised his eyebrows. “Yes. I did. I kept my clothes on.” He adjusted his sweater, making sure it stayed on over his shoulder. There were a couple of marks there.
“All of your clothes? What’s that?” Mark gasped, faking incredulity. “Are those hickeys?”
“Stop! Shh. Stop it.” Billy snuggled into his sweater, snickering.
“You have hickeys,” he whispered. “I can’t believe you. My baby’s all grown up.”
“Shh. It’s... okay, fine, yes, but.” Billy straightened his shoulders and settled in, looking rather proud of himself. “If I manage to keep this secret I … will be stunned. No. Scratch that. I can keep a secret. Luka can’t.”
“So you’ll have to keep his mouth shut. So how is he?” Mark had spent a lot of time telling Billy about his flings and the boys he messed around with. It was finally Billy’s turn and Mark was kind of relieved.
Billy shook his head. “No details,” he said. “I mean. He’s... he’s...” Sick. Exhausted. A good kisser but clearly ill. He blinked away tears. “Good,” he said. “Really good.”
Mark frowned, reaching for Billy so he could brush back some of his hair. “What’s wrong?”
“He’s...” Billy closed his eyes. “He’s really sick, Mark. He hides it as best he can, but there’s a reason he’s building his own heart and racing the clock. He had me leave because he said I needed to sleep but he needed the rest more than I did.”
“I’m really sorry, Billy.” He knew that Luka wasn’t terribly energetic, but he hid just how sick he was. Knowing it was all real was … strange.
Billy nodded, running a hand over his face. “It’s worse than he lets on. I don’t think he tells me everything, obviously, but … he was exhausted, so I tucked him in and came back.”
Mark was quiet for a few long moments, slipping his hand back underneath his pillow. “How long does he have?”
“I don’t know,” Billy said honestly. He slowly shifted back into his natural form, almost like he needed the extra fur and the claws as a defense. “It depends. He’s at risk for a lot of infections, the blood thinners make it worse. He won’t tell me a lot, but I’ve been doing my own research anyway. But he’s basically in a position where if he isn’t extremely careful it could just... end. Holding off until his heart is finished isn’t easy, let alone waiting the years for a transplant.”
Mark leaned in to nuzzle, closing his eyes tight. “You’re a good man, Billy.”
Billy tipped his head slightly. “No one’s ever called me that before.”
“You are, though. You’re talking about this like it hasn’t even occurred to you that you don’t want to wait it out with him. Even though it’s a secret, and you’ve been together for five minutes. And... I love you. And you’re awesome.” Mark flushed and pulled back, already feeling silly for saying it.
Billy was listening intently. His facial expressions were a little harder to read when he was in his natural form. “Why wouldn’t I want to wait it out with him?”
“Exactly.”
Billy’s ears twitched and he bowed his head. “Thank you.” Being called a man really meant something to him. He wasn’t sure he felt like one in other areas of his life, but when it came to Luka, he didn’t really feel like some kind of blushing schoolboy or anything.
Mark wished he was more like Billy. He wished he already felt as strongly for Owen as Billy did for Luka, but he didn’t. And it seemed better to keep that thought to himself and settle in for sleep. It was almost three in the morning and they had class in a few hours. “Mm. Now go to sleep.”
“Love you, too,” Billy said belatedly, curling up and burying his face in the pillow. A few deep breaths and he was out like a light.